Squidward Quotes

Today was the dance contest, the one where Squidward takes over Spongebob's body...During the competition, Squidward gets a cramp and Spongebob's body ends up writhing on the floor in agony. The audience thinks this is pretty cool and gives him First Prize. Quite a metaphor. The person in the most pain wins. Does that mean I get a Blue Ribbon?

you either die a spongebob or live long enough to become a squidward

SpongeBob SquarePants vs. Squidward Tentacles When SpongeBob SquarePants tried to have kinky sex with Squidward Tentacles, SpongeBob was confused as to whether to suck the octopus's nose or use Squidward's head as a butt-plug. SpongeBob appreciated a challenge and decided to do both at the same time. Now SpongeBob has a lucrative career as a Yoga instructor at Yogis Anonymous in Santa Monica. Gary the Snail runs the Spin class.

I remember watching SpongeBob and laughing as he and Patrick irritated Squidward.

remember watching SpongeBob and laughing as he and Patrick irritated Squidward.

Hey VILLAGER! You’re a stupid Squidward-nose-having donkey-fart-loving lame face!” With a stupid smile on his face. But the villager just laughed it off.  

hawk tuah

Squidward Tentacles is a Greedy Bitch {Limerick} When I was a kid under age eight, I watched Spongebob with awe and wonder. Now I've become a blundering squid (lying in wait with a takeover bid) to triple my troy weight and plunder.

I remember watching SpongeBob and laughing as he and Patrick irritated Squidward. Mom

I hate all of you.

Please come again… when I’m not working.

Why must every 11 minutes of my life be filled with misery?

Another day, another migraine.

We were way too different. I was fun. He was not. I was happy. He was like Squidward from SpongeBob.

I’m SpongeBob, he’s Squidward, and the address is simply Pineapple Under the Sea.

If I had a dollar for every brain you don’t have, I’d have one dollar!” –  Squidward on SpongeBob SquarePants

Everyone's a critic.