Nicole Sobon Quotes

Sometimes the hardest part isn't letting go but rather learning to start over.

You love them, even though they're gone. In order to love you need to live, if you give up on life you can no longer love. You'd no longer have the capability to love them.

My past is trying to catch up to me and I must continue run from it. It's the only way I can live.

The thing about the truth was that it sometimes tore apart the perfect world we forced ourselves into believing existed.

How could you explain to someone that sometimes it was not worth living in the past when the past was all that they had worth living for?

People screw up. People screw up a lot. We allow our own selfishness to overpower us at times. It happens. But you can’t allow that to tear you down. You can’t keep dwelling on your past choices, and your past actions, or else you’ll never learn from them.

I went from having everything to losing it all almost instantly. Something that traumatic changes a person. The anger, the depression – it shapes you until you become unrecognizable. Until the person you were has been erased.

I closed my eyes, seeking a moment of peace but finding none. Behind my eyelids, an entirely new nightmare was waiting. This wasn’t another haunting memory. This was a new form of torture.

There is no way of stopping death, not here. You can prolong it. But at some point, it is bound to catch up to you.

It was easy to believe in anything when you were desperate enough...

Just as I allowed them to live in my mind, I allowed them to die.

For one last time, I said my goodbyes to the place I’d known as home for the last decade, and for the first time, I welcomed the unknown.

No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t let them go. He wanted to start fresh, but there is no denying the heart what it longs for – especially when it longs for home.

All of this time – I need you to answer one thing,” I paused, preparing for the incoming heartbreak that would surely follow. “Did you ever give up on me?” “Never.” Her voice was stern. “No matter how much trouble you may have caused, Taylen. No matter how much you may have hurt me. I’ve never given up on you, love, and I never will.

It never ceased to amaze me just how fast one could lose everything.

Hope could be a devastating emotion if you allowed it to control you. But it was a risk that I was willing to take.

Hope. It was both the best thing and the worst thing that could happen to a person. It had the ability to consume a person, to become them. I used to believe in the idea of hope before I saw what it had done to Hayden – what I had done to Hayden.

He looked up at me without saying a word. I tried to hold it together but I could feel myself breaking as I fell to the floor, my face in my hands – tears flowing down my cheeks. For the first time in a while I felt like I was truly losing a hold of myself.

He’s safe, I repeated to myself over and over again. But even I knew it wasn’t the truth. For now he was safe, but they’d find him. Eventually they’d find him, they always do. I was supposed to protect him. I was supposed to keep him alive. Instead I’d brought him directly into the lion’s pit.

I really need to remember to block my thoughts." "Oh, come on," he pulled me closer towards him. "Why are you so scared?" "Because the second that I let this conversation happen, I'll be letting my walls down. No matter what answer you give me, you'll have some sort of power over me, and I don't want that." I pushed past him, plopping down on the bed, not bothering to remove my boots. I could feel the mattress sink beside me. Ian ran his fingers through my hair. "Come here," he spoke softly. "Please." I pushed myself into a sitting position, and moved closer to him, leaning my head on Ian's shoulder. "I like this, a lot. It feels nice." Ian lifted my chin so that I was forced to look directly at him, and then he leaned in to kiss me.

body went tense, forcing goose bumps to rise over my bare arms. My tough demeanor had been ripped apart and was replaced by a frightened little girl in need of her father’s protection. But he wasn’t here, and all I had was Jeremy. It wasn’t his responsibility to protect me. He shouldn’t have to worry about me. And I shouldn’t be falling apart like this.

Hope could be a devastating emotion if you allowed it to control you.

As much as I hated the silence, I also found a small part of me that appreciated it. Because, even for just a brief moment, it allowed me to escape the chaos that surrounded me. Silence, as unnerving as it was, was also rather beautiful.

I had an unfortunate habit of allowing my anger to blind me. An extremely unfortunate habit. Glate knew that, and he knew how to stop me from doing something stupid. He was my sense of reality in a world thrown off balance. But he wasn’t here now.

I knew it was a terrible idea. We were supposed to be leaving our past behind us, not fully embracing it. But she was a part of my past that I wanted to hold onto. She was my only reminder of Tommy, my only remaining connection. I couldn’t let that die, not yet.

I walked slowly, my eyes focused on the gravel beneath me. I didn’t know where I was going, not that I cared. I just needed to get away. Soon enough, I’d find my way home. I had to believe that. There was a loud crackling noise in the sky as the thunder rolled through the clouds. I threw my head back, admiring the storm above. The sky was dark with flashes of white sparking throughout with each bolt of lightening following behind the thunder. It was beautiful. “After the storm, you will find peace.” I smiled as the sound boomed through the quiet neighborhood. And in that moment I felt at one with the storm as the pain inside of me slowly began to seep out.

This is your idea of mission uniform?” Cole asked, eyeing my burgundy leather ensemble. I arched a brow at him as I shoved my cell phone inside of my back pant pocket. “What? Do you have a problem with it?” “Well, last I checked, we were supposed to get in and take care of the mission without drawing any attention to ourselves.” “And we will,” I assured him. “Just remember to keep your eyes on the target as opposed to on me, and we’ll be fine.

Life as a hunter often felt pre-determined for us. We were taught to use a stake early on, and hunting was something we were taught was a right of passage. I’d learned, though, nothing in life was set in stone. All it took was one minor shake-up for our plans to change. It was terrifying at first, sure. The idea of having to accept the world wasn’t what you thought it to be, but once you let go of the idea that you had to follow a certain plan, life became better.

Together. The fact that one single word could send my heart aflutter was utterly ridiculous. I didn’t fall for boys I hardly knew. At least, I hadn’t until I met Glate. The night in the shack, things changed between us. The walls I’d built up once the Sectors were formed? Glate had torn them down, and I knew that Lex could see that by the daggers he kept shooting our way. Was I in love with Glate? No, though I was sure Lex thought otherwise. Glate was the stability I sought in a world of discord; being with him made things easier to handle. I wasn’t weak, but even I had my breaking point, and when I was ready to break, he was there to pick up all of the pieces. He was there, something I could never say for Lex. “Thank you,” I said after a few moments of silence. “For everything.” “Everyone needs a shoulder to lean on,” he said. “I’m more than willing to be that shoulder for you, Taylen. I’m willing to be whatever you need me to be. Just know that.

I needed Hack to think that I would comply, that I’d go along with his nonsense because that would be the only way to discover the truth. I needed him to think he was in control so that he could slip up. All it would take was one mishap on his end, that was all I would need. One mistake and I would be able to figure out what he was hiding. So instead of allowing my anger to guide me, I chose to allow hope to lead me in the right direction. Hope was my ammunition. And I was the weapon.

I knew that I was about to walk into Hell – not literally, of course, but as close to it as one could get on Earth – and I wasn’t sure that I’d last to see another day. But I also knew that I didn’t regret the actions that had led to me being here. Love, pure love was one of the most exhilarating things that I’d ever experienced. I’d never known a feeling more genuine, or thrilling than the feeling of being in love. It was an all-consuming thing; a feeling that overtook your mind and body, one that I’d hoped I’d never forget because the experience of love was something that every person should have had the right to.

On one hand, I knew that we should have headed back to the others. Taking time to get cozy with Glate wasn’t the smartest of choices, especially given what had happened last time we tried to take advantage of what little free time we’d had with one another. But on the other hand? Life was far too short to not give into temptation every now and again. We were all merely existing to die at one point or another. There would be no happily-ever-after for any of us. Life was what you made of it, and even if the world that I had found myself in had been complete and utter shit, I had decided that I would see to it that I lived out my last days happily.

I shot him a smile and spun back around to face my computer screen, unable to process what the hell had just happened. That was when I noticed a small Post-It-note pressed against my Dell monitor. Scribbled across the neon pink sticky was a note from Jesse: Evie, what are you so afraid of? -Jesse What was I afraid of? I was afraid of everything. I was afraid of letting people in. I was afraid of falling. But most of all, I was afraid of myself. I was my own worst enemy. I grabbed a blank Post-It note from the container on my desk and pulled a black pen out of my coat pocket. I allowed my hand to move freely, not thinking of my response. Only then, after I placed the pen down on my desk did I read what I’d written. Reality.

I want to do this right,” he said. “Wha—?” I went to protest, but he stopped me before I could. “Gemma, trust me when I say I want nothing more than to kiss you. Hell, I’d love to take you right now, right here, but I can’t.” Well, this was not where I saw things going. I crossed my arms over my chest in a pitiful attempt at mock sadness. Ben just laughed. “Do you know why I can’t?” Obviously not, I thought to myself. If I had, I wouldn’t have been begging for him to continue. Lying this close to him? It was hard to forget what had just occurred. My body was aching for his presence, for his touch, still adjusting to the electric shock that had coursed through me. “No,” I answered. “Please, enlighten me.” Ben reached for my hand, entwining my fingers with his. A devilish grin spread upon his full lips. “Because, when I do finally kiss you, Gemma Michaels, I want to see to it that I’m your last first kiss.

Harley, if you’re asking me to marry you, I’m afraid I must say no,” he joked. “I mean, we hardly know each other, and you haven’t even bothered to ask my parents for my hand.” “Will you shut up?” As much as I didn’t want to laugh, I failed. That was the good thing about Drake. He could be annoying, sure, but he knew how to lighten the mood when things became tense. “I’m being serious, Drake.” “Okay, then shoot.” “Are you like me?” As the words escaped my lips, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders. “What do you think?” “Answering a question with a question doesn’t work,” I answered. “And I think you are.” “Well, then, you can rest assured knowing you’re right.” He shrugged as he turned the chair around to properly face me. “Although, I do believe I wasn’t supposed to tell you as much just yet.” “Was my father behind this?” Drake shook his head no. “The League—more specifically, the Council—had nothing to do with my arrival,” he assured me. “I came here for you, yes, but only because the clan of the vampire you killed is looking for you. And while you might not believe it, I’m your best chance at survival.

But do you think our futures are already determined for us?” “Why are you asking all of this? What’s going on?” I let out a small laugh. “Remember when we were in the hallway?” He nodded. “Well, Thirteen tried telling me that I couldn’t escape my fate and that there was no point in fighting the inevitable.” “Do you think it is inevitable?” he asked. “Me?” I scoffed. “No. Nothing is ever guaranteed. One minor adjustment can alter everything. Nothing is ever set in stone. As of right now, we’re all on one path: we’re all stuck inside of this hell that we’re trying to escape, and it may seem like the outcome has already been determined for us, but it hasn’t. The smallest of things could change everything. A death. Deception. Anything could force us to follow another path, and you know what? We determine that path, not fate.” “What path do you see yourself on?” Colton hopped up onto the computer desk, tucking his hands underneath his thighs. “I see us starting new lives outside of this place, far from McVeigh and his men,” I answered honestly. “But I know not all of us will make it out of here. There is still more pain to come our way, but there is also happiness if we allow for it.

Taylen,” Glate whispered, wrapping his arm around my waist. “Are you okay?” Was I okay? No. I was a complete and utter wreck, but there was no way in hell I was going to show him that. “I’m dandy.” “You’re a terrible liar.” He propped himself up on his elbow, and leaned in closer, resting his chin on my shoulder. My body was well aware of how close he was, and it took everything in me to fight the urge to turn and face him. Teenage hormones were the absolute worst. “You know how I can tell?” he asked, running a single finger down my arm. “How?” the word barely escaped my lips. “Your voice trembles,” he whispered. Glate moved his hand to my hips and pulled me back towards him. “Whenever you lie, you get this slight tremble in your voice. It’s almost as if you’re scared to admit the truth, so you try to conjure up a lie, but the fear engulfs your words on the way out, calling your bluff.

The sun’s rays reflected beautifully upon the water, creating a magnificent glistening effect over the waves. The pier to the left was docking ships, while on the right, a ferry took off into the open waters. It was a beautiful sight to watch; how small everything looked in something as big as the ocean. It reminded me of people, how we were just a small part of what made up the world. Our numbers might be large, but we were not alone in this world. We were insignificant to nature.

What happens if they return?” I asked, leaning forward in the metal chair, my elbow pressing into my knee. “Won’t they seek punishment for all of us?” “Maybe they’ll return, maybe they won’t,” Gwen shrugged. “All I know is that as long as I hold on to that feeling of love – that feeling of pure happiness, that rush of joy – then I’ll be okay because in the end, the only thing that matters is that we had the chance to love and that we held onto that feeling until the very end.

I’d spent my entire life in Seattle, watching others pass me by, day after day, completely oblivious to me. I remained along the background. I was an outsider; the eye looking in on the world around me. I was the puppet eager to cut her strings. I had witnessed the transformation humans must undergo in order to become Programs. I had watched as their humanity was stripped from them while they lay motionless, their hearts barely beating. My uncle had told the others that he only took bodies of the deceased, but those of us who had spent time in the operating rooms knew differently.

I’d been so closed off from the world, that I’d never known true love – until I met Hayden. Seeing the way that he cared for his sister, how he was willing to risk his life in order to rescue her? It showed me that love knows no bounds, and that it can be the most powerful thing in the world, because even death couldn’t kill his love for his sister.

Does it truly make a difference how I’m alive?” I asked him. But he didn’t answer. I walked over to where Hayden stood, resting my hand on his. I looked at the photo he held before making my way along the wall. Every photo was of our family. The family that existed before the accident. The family that existed before I was struck by a car. I wasn’t supposed to remember it, but I did. When they exported my memories and my life from my body, every trace of the accident was supposed to be erased. But it still remained. You can’t erase death. That was what Hayden was trying to tell me. No matter how much he wanted to forget, he couldn’t.

I slumped down against the wall and pulled my knees up beneath my chin. “Sometimes it just feels as though we’re fighting for nothing; as though all of this is nothing more than a never ending cycle of pain.” “But isn’t that all life is?’ Grant countered. “A never ending cycle of pain that we learn to maneuver? Isn’t it all about finding the tiniest bits of happiness, and making something out of them? I mean, life will never be perfect. It’s meant to have its ups and downs. You just have to learn to make it worthwhile, even when it feels as though the world itself is collapsing around you.

Wait. Was that a thank you, or a lecture?” I stared back at Ramona, eyebrows raised. “A bit of both, I suppose.” She laughed. “Just do not do anything that stupid again. Got it?” “Would you believe me if I swore to you that I wouldn't anything stupid, ever again?” “Not for a second.

I laughed as I thought of what Savannah would have told me had she been here. “You’re capable of anything Jer. You’re much stronger than you give yourself credit for. Keep pushing; it’ll all be okay in the end.” Then I’d turn and smile at her, nudging her in her side as she looked up towards the sky. Whenever she thought of dad, she shifted her attention towards the sky, as if she were looking for him in the clouds. It was the same thing I found myself doing now. Except I wasn’t looking for dad, I was searching for her. But there was nothing. The night sky, usually lit up by the moon and the surrounding stars, was empty.

You know,” I fold my arms over my chest. “You’re quite annoying, but I guess your company is better than no company.” Keegan presses his arm against the wall beside my head and smiles. His curly black hair stands out against his pale skin. The slightest bit of sunlight finds its way inside the patio, reflecting upon his icy green eyes. His light pink lips turn up in a smile. With his mouth closed, he is actually quite attractive.

Sometimes the hardest part isn’t letting go but rather learning to start over. ~Nicole Sobon I

I missed her. I missed her more than I’d ever admit aloud, but she was gone now, and there was no changing that. They burned her body just to be sure. After all, they couldn’t chance the possibility that the disease would survive after she’d died. “There’s still too much we don’t understand. It’s the only way to ensure the safety of the survivors.” Survivors. Such an odd word for our predicament. Yeah, we were still ourselves. Still human. Our minds still within our control. But were we alive? We spent our lives running, trying to escape the ever-tightening grasp of death, and yet, we were the survivors – the lucky ones.

I’d always wondered if I would ever encounter that kind of love. If I’d ever be so lucky to know what it was like to willingly give everything I had to one person. I’d always thought it was a long shot. Me? In love, better yet, willing to settle down? Yeah, right. Gemma Michaels had other plans, though. The night we spent together at the park was the promise of what was to come; we just didn’t know it then. “I wanted to bring you back to the place where I began to fall in love with you,” I’d said. My lips twitched as tears began to swell at the corners of Gemma’s eyes. “You bastard,” she said with a laugh. “Remember how I said you lack charm? I was wrong. You can be pretty charming when you want to be.” “Only when it comes to you, love.” “Okay, no need to overdo it, bigshot. You’ve already got me.” When we got older, Molly asked my dad why he’d ultimately decided to stay following Mom’s affair. His answer had been simple. “No one is without fault, Molly. Giving up on the person that matters most to you because they acted out of fear is not love—you fight for love, dear. Because things worth caring about, the things that make your heart race, those are the things worth fighting for.” I didn’t get it then. But now, as I looked into Gemma’s eyes, I finally understood what he’d meant.

When a knock finally sounded from outside the apartment, I eagerly rose to my feet and made my way toward the door to let him in. “You do realize you have a key, correct?” I teased, trying to bite back my nerves. “You don’t have to knock.” “I don’t have to, but I wanted to.” He leaned in and gave me a peck on my cheek and I took in the smell of his cologne. It was light enough that it was hardly noticeable from a distance, but up close, it was a mesmerizing scent, one reminiscent of sandalwood. He pulled a small bouquet of flowers from behind his back and handed them to me. “Your favorite, of course." All at once, my nerves seemed to ease up. I smiled as I took the purple tulips from Ben and went in search of a vase to store them in. “I’ll admit, I can get used to this.” “Is that so?” He cocked a brow as he followed me into the kitchen. “Well, I’ll admit, I could get used to you like this.” He moved in behind me as I stood at the sink, filling a vase with water for the flowers, and wrapped his arms around my waist. “I’m a lucky man,” he whispered, leaning in closely so that his warm breath caught against my neck, eliciting a chill throughout my body. “You look amazing, Gems. So much so that I fear if we don’t leave soon, I won’t be able to stop myself from dragging you to your bedroom.” “Is that supposed to be a threat or an offer?” I grabbed hold of his arms and pressed back against him. In response, he let out a growl. “Don’t tempt me, love. It’s already hard enough,” he insisted. “We’re supposed to do things the right way, remember?” “Ah, yes. You and your ‘right way’ nonsense.” I leaned my head back to look up at him and grinned because I knew he was fighting it, and it would only be a matter of time before he caved. “I know you and sooner or later, you’re going to give in.” “Don’t tempt me, love.” He pulled one of his hands from mine and ran his right thumb over my jaw. “I’m trying to be good here.” “But maybe I don’t want you to be good, Benjamin.

You were utterly perfect,” he said, forcing me from my thoughts. “I’ve never hated myself more than I did that night because you were the girl I should’ve been with. You were the one I wanted to be with.” And yet, I wasn’t the one he’d chosen to go with. Even now, all of these years later, it still hurt to recall the pain I’d felt after he bailed on me. And hearing him say those words? Well, they kind of pissed me off. “Then why didn’t you do something back then?” He pressed his forehead to mine and closed his eyes. He dropped his right hand to my hip and tugged on the fabric of my pajama shorts, bunching the fabric in his fist. “Because I was a fucking idiot, Gemma.” “Besides, you wouldn’t have wanted me back then,” he continued. “Back then? I spent most of my time thinking with my dick, and you deserved a hell of a lot better than me. You, Gemma Michaels, deserve the world.” He ran his left hand up the side of my body, bringing his hand to rest at my waist, and I had to fight the urge to pull him closer to me. I wanted more, but I wanted to see how far he was willing to take things, first. “And I would like to be the one to show you that,” he said. “Show me what?” I asked. He grinned. “The world, sweetheart.

As she waitress hurried off toward the back, I turned to look at Gemma and grinned. “Benjamin? The full name, Gems? Was that really necessary?” She leaned in and laughed. “A girl’s gotta have some fun.” “Well, I could think of a few ways to aid in that cause.” Blood rushed to Gemma’s cheeks as she glanced around, apparently to make sure no one had been paying us any mind. Fortunately for her, no one else was within earshot, allowing her to relax. Still, it didn’t take away from my pleasure of seeing her squirm in her seat. Although she wouldn’t admit it aloud, I knew Gemma’s mind had gone there, too. “Will you behave? This is a fine-dining establishment,” she quipped. “You’re adorable.” I leaned over, somewhat hanging off the stool, and pressed a quick kiss to her cheek. “Now let’s get you some pizza, shall we?” “I knew there was a reason I loved you.

Don’t be an idiot, Drake. I’m more than capable of enough poor decision-making on my own,” I reminded him. “I don’t need you falling victim to my half-assed decisions today.” A smile tugged at his lips, and before I knew it, he’d had his arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me closer against him. I was fast, but he was faster. Much faster, it seemed. “You don’t get to make my mind up for me, Harley. I’m more than capable of making my own decisions.” “Well then, perhaps you should learn to make some good ones.” Drake tightened his grasp on my waist and dropped his head so that our foreheads touched. I felt the heat of his breath on my lips as he opened his mouth to speak. “Whatever happens to you today, I’m going to be there by your side. No matter what.” “Don’t be a creep,” I teased. Truthfully, though, I actually wanted him there. It was stupid, and I knew as much. I needed to retain a distance between us; I needed to keep him safe, no matter what. And yet, I needed him to be there for me because I was terrified of what awaited me.

He used his free hand to grab a hold of my chin and lift my face to his. His eyes were locked onto mine as though he had discovered the most important thing in his life. Me. “I don’t want to give you up,” he said before pressing his lips to mine. At first, I hesitated. I wanted this. I wanted him. But I knew I needed to keep my thoughts clear. Well, that and I was still fearful of allowing things between us to become much of anything more because the idea of giving him so much of myself was unsettling. I was still figuring out who I was and what I was meant to do with my life. I couldn’t be sure where I would be in two years. Even a week from now was hard to imagine. I would’ve loved to believe he would still be by my side, but life was everchanging and nothing was ever promised to us. I couldn’t stand the idea of letting him in, only to have to learn to live without him should things go wrong. The truth of it all was that I’d been on my own for so long, I had forgotten what it was like to let someone else into your world, and the idea of closing that door again? I couldn’t do it. “This should be the last thing you want,” I said. “And yet, it’s the only thing I want.” “Perhaps I’m not the only one capable of making terrible decisions then.” Drake pressed his lips to mine again, and this time, I welcomed his mouth against mine. There was an urgency in the kiss, though he made sure to keep it soft and gentle. There was no denying the fear in his movements. And that worried me. What had he intended to do that he was so scared?

None of you are intending on coming back, are you?” I finally managed to ask. “You never intended to see this through to the end.” “When you’ve lived a life as long as ours, Harley, the promise of death is the only thing to look forward to.” Esme shared a smile with Felix, who tipped his head ever so slightly in agreement. “This isn’t a battle we ever truly wanted to be a part of; it was merely a way to ensure our death would come at last.” “Couldn’t you have just asked them to kill you?” Frustration overtook my voice because I realized the danger they’d put us all in for selfish reasons. “The Ancient Elders will do whatever they can to keep themselves safe,” Felix answered. “You have to remember, we’re their personal weapons. They don’t want to see our demise.” “Don’t get us wrong, we still hate your kind,” Amelia assured me. “But when you’ve lived a life as long as us, sooner or later, you find yourself craving an end to it all.” “So comforting, Amelia,” I groaned. Honestly, I wasn’t entirely sold on her hating hunters. Or at least, she hadn’t truly hated hybrids as much as she would have liked me to believe. After all, she’d given me a weapon to take down the Ancients myself. Still, I didn’t dare share our secret with the others.

If it comes down to it, and it doesn’t look like I’ll win,” I started. “Let me die.” He stood perfectly still for a moment, his eyes dark and his lips pursed as though carefully mulling over his words. When he finally did speak, the sudden rasp of his voice sent a shiver down my spine. “As a servant of Dante, I’m not to risk my own being to save your own. However, I can’t let you sacrifice yourself for a war you were unfairly born into.” “Dare I ask why” I placed my hand in his and allowed him to pull me to my feet. “Because some souls are worth saving.

Juliet,” he said as I closed the gap between us. “Have you finally come to plead for my hand in marriage?” “And why the hell would I do that?” I groaned. “Don’t act as if you’re not head over heels in love with me.” “Trust me when I say the only thing I feel towards you is the strong desire to plunge my stake into your chest,” I said with a shit-eating grin. “But for some reason, Ezekiel thinks you’re worth keeping around, so I have to play nice. For now.” Deacon took a step closer and reached out his hand and grabbed hold of my face. “As if you wouldn’t let me kiss you right now,” he teased. “As if you wouldn’t let me do whatever I wanted with you if I asked.” I rolled my eyes and yanked his arm away. “In your dreams, Deacon.” “Oh, you have no idea, Juliet.

What the hell was wrong with me? Was I secretly attracted to Deacon? And if so, how the hell had that happened? I tried to force myself to focus on something - anything - else. No such luck. Traitor, I thought to myself. I’d spent a majority of my life living among vampires and as a general rule, I always made it a point not to get into bed with them. It wasn’t that they weren’t attractive. They were. Hell, there were plenty of vampires I’d caught myself fantasizing about before Deacon. But with him, I actually wanted to act on those fantasies and that was dangerous territory. A heart could be a deadly thing in a world at war. And I couldn’t risk losing mine to a vampire soldier because I wanted him.

I was drawn to him. My body sung in his presence, a hymn so low it was only audible to the two of us.

I didn’t have to like her to have a little fun. I wanted her, and there was no use denying it. I was the hunter, and she was my prey. Everything in me said it was wrong. And yet… my body hungered for her touch. To feel her fingers as they ran over my skin, to feel the warmth of her flesh against mine; my lips pressed to her neck. I wanted to caress every inch of her body, to make her beg for me to stop, and I hated myself for it. Fucking hell. But I couldn’t stop. I didn’t. “I can hear your heartbeat, princess,” I said, my voice full of desire and lust. “It’s racing with excitement. You want this, don’t you? Why, I imagine if I were to slip those panties off, I’d find you ready and waiting for me.” “Is that what you spent your shower doing? Thinking about me?” I could’ve been honest. I could’ve told her yes. But I refused to let her have the upper hand. No. If this was going to happen, I was going to be in control.

I told you to look at me,” I growled. “Now, how about you listen and be a good girl, princess?” “Give me one good reason,” she teased. I felt the hunger as it took over my body. I sensed it the moment my eyes turned black. The moment my body went rigid on top of hers. Her scent had consumed me. It was a new hunger I’d never experienced. One I hadn’t known I needed. Without another word, I leaned down and pressed my lips to her. Desire erupted upon my tongue. I dug my fingers into her hips, adjusting her so that she was pressed tightly against me. “Is this a good enough reason?” Our mouths met with a fierce passion, our tongues caressing one another as we were running low on time. “It’s going to take a hell of a lot more than that to woo me,” she said as we broke apart momentarily. “What else are you capable of doing with that tongue of yours?” I often wondered how I would die. Never once did I believe it would be at the mercy of someone like Juliet. But my cock had never been one to make the best decisions. “Oh, you’ll find that out soon enough. Don’t worry about that, princess. I plan to taste every single inch of you before we’re through.” “Promises, promises,” she said as she rolled her eyes playfully. “I’m afraid I don’t have time to wait for you to back up your words.

You don’t understand it now, but I am keeping you safe,” he insisted. “Trust me, if it wasn’t for me, you would have been dead by now. They’ve also kept you alive because they knew I would kill them if they hadn’t.” “Oh, I’m sorry, is that supposed to make me feel better?” I wanted to hate him. My goodness did I want to hate him. The problem was, no matter how much he had pissed me off, I couldn’t bring myself to write him off. He was a piece of crap for allowing me to be captured. But I had to believe there was still good beneath the boy who stood before me. It couldn’t have all been a façade, could it? Don’t be an idiot, Harley. I just wanted to be happy, and Drake had presented a possibility of something I had wanted for so long but refused to admit aloud. For so long, the idea of wanting to be with someone terrified me. Heck, a future with someone seemed to be a novel idea. Then this frustrating and wonderful boy had entered my life and threw it into utter chaos. It was exciting, and I hadn’t wanted to consider my life without him. But I also knew I had to question how much of what he’d displayed with me was real.

Heightened senses would be useful in the field. But in day-to-day life? No, thanks. My thoughts were an utter disaster as it was. I’d spent so much time trying to get outside of my head, reminding myself that the person my mind thought I was and the person I truly was were two different entities. Taking on the weight of the world around me was an unnecessary evil I wasn’t looking forward to dealing with on a daily basis.

This should be the last thing you want,” I said. “And yet, it’s the only thing I want.” “Perhaps I’m not the only one capable of making terrible decisions then.” Drake pressed his lips to mine again, and this time, I welcomed his mouth against mine. There was an urgency in the kiss, though he made sure to keep it soft and gentle. There was no denying the fear in his movements. And that worried me. What had he intended to do that he was so scared?

Should I take your silence to be an opening?” He brushed his lips against my ear. “You ask far too many questions.” Drake released me from his grasp and climbed on top of me. “You have full control over what happens, Harley. Do you understand? If at any point you’re not comfortable, I need you to tell me.” “Understood.” Drake looked down at me with a teasing smirk on his lips. “Now, will you just stop procrastinating and kiss me already before I change my mind?” He leaned in and gently pressed his lips to mine as though testing my reaction. But slow was not how I preferred to roll. I reached up and ran my fingers through his hair. Drake seemed to understand what I was doing and pressed his body against mine. I knew I should have stopped it. I should have stopped him. But I couldn't. This was what I wanted. Drake pulled away slowly. An amused grin pulled at his lips. "What?" I asked. He shook his head. "You, Harley Sanders, will be my undoing.

How do you get over being thrust into a life you didn’t ask for, though?” Amelia forced a laugh. “Life doesn’t care what you want, Harley.” Her words were harsh but full of truth. I knew it. Did I want to accept it? Absolutely not. I did understand, though. I couldn’t do anything about what led me here. I could, however, figure out how to move forward and hope for something better. Was it guaranteed I would succeed? Nope. Did I intend to try regardless? Yes.

Lucas’ mind was an interesting place. He was always thinking of a back up plan, there was always an escape already in place just in case things went wrong. It was fascinating, yet frightening at the same time. Through his memories I was able to determine that at some point in his life, he was actually a decent human being.

While I waited for Adley to answer, I took in our surroundings. The sky was a lovely shade of pink, there were scattered flowers outlining the river – all of them varying shades of blue. Birds flew above us, humming the sweetest of sounds. Things seemed almost perfect. Almost, since the circumstances over which we’d escaped to this place were undesirable.

Nicole sobon

She had been reprogrammed. She knew how to protect herself from intruders – from me. That was the worst part of it all. I was an outsider inside of my own body.

Haven’t you ever heard the saying that our pasts do not define us?” I countered, growing frustrated. “I screwed up, Hayden. I admitted that. Why can’t you let it go?” “Let it go?” He sneered. “You are the reason my sister is a Program. Please, tell me how I’m supposed to let something like that go? Because I’d love to know.” Footsteps sounded from outside of the holding cell, essentially ending our conversation. I still had much to say to him, but for now, I welcomed the silence. The silence was much more comforting than the truth.

You’re going to turn me into one of them, aren’t you?” “That is what my uncle expects from me, but I can’t do that to you.” “Except you will,” he said, dropping his arm to his side. “Humans are weak individuals. We will do anything and everything in order to protect ourselves – any morals we have instinctively go out the door when it comes down to life or death. And as you’ve already shown, you’re no different from the rest of us.

This cell was a form of hell. I was trapped in my past, unable to escape my mistakes, forced to relive them each time a new body was brought in. It was tortuous, and so much like my uncle.