Kidney Awareness Quotes

confusedly aware that he was doing something that for a very long time he had wanted to do but that he had imagined could really never be done, not knowing what he was doing because he did not know where his feet were or where his head was, or whose feet or whose head, and feeling that he could no longer resist the glacial rumbling of his kidneys and the air of his intestines, and fear, and the bewildered anxiety to flee and at the same time stay forever in that exasperated silence and that fearful solitude.

Get your dagger,' he orders. 'What?' My eyes fly wide. He has me defenceless and in the kill position already. 'Get. Your. Dagger,' he repeats, taking my hand in his and retrieving the last blade I have. His fingers curl over mine, clasping the hilt. Fire races along my skin at the feel of his fingers lacing with mine. Toxic. Dangerous. Wants to kill you. Nope, doesn't matter. My pulse still skitters like a teenager. 'You're tiny.' He says it like an insult. 'Well aware.' My eyes narrow. 'So stop going for bigger moves that expose you.' He drags the tip of the dagger down his side. 'A rib shot would've worked just fine.' Then he guides our hands around his back, making himself vulnerable. 'Kidneys are a good fit from this angle, too.' I swallow, refusing to think of other things that are a good fit at this angle. He leads our hands to his waist, his gaze never leaving mine. 'Chances are, if your opponent is in armour, it's weak here. Those are three easy places you could have struck before your opponent would have had time to stop you.' They're also fatal wounds, and I've avoided them at all costs. 'Do you hear me?' I nod. 'Good. Because you can't poison every enemy you come across,' he whispers, and I blanche. 'You're not going to have time to offer tea to some Braevi gryphon rider when they come at you.' 'How did you know?' I finally ask. My muscles lock, including my thighs, which just happen to still be bracketing his hips. His eyes darken. 'Oh, Violence. You're good, but I've known better poison masters. The trick is to not make it quite so obvious.

1. Oral Involvement 2. Laryngeal Involvement 3. Cardiovascular Involvement 4. Skin: rashes, vitiligo, Raynaud’s 5. Constitutional symptoms: including fever, fatigue, and muscle wasting (cachexia), infections 6. Rheumatoid vasculitis and blood vessel disease 7. Lung Involvement 8. Kidney involvement 9. Eye involvement 10. Other organs: including spleen, liver, lymph system, gut KEY POINTS 1. Some symptoms and antibodies can precede diagnosis over 10 years. 2. Many studies indicate RD begins in the lungs, before joint symptoms are diagnosable. 3. RD is often called an “invisible”illness because symptoms are not obvious to casual observers. 4. Doctors must be more aware that systemic symptoms like fatigue may indicate serious problems. 5. Extra-articular disease has been proven to affect most PRD, but is still not widely recognized. 6. Acknowledging rheumatoid disease that exists beyond and before joint inflammation (arthritis) could bring a) Improved care for lower mortality b) Improved research for better treatments c) Improved diagnosis for increased remissions

Perhaps the most significant thing to be aware of here, for anyone who works a desk job, is that sitting is an independent health risk factor—meaning that even if you do exercise, sitting for eight hours each day will still damage your health.124 According to Thomas Yates, MD, “Even for people who are otherwise active, sitting for long stretches seems to be an independent risk factor for conditions like diabetes, cardiovascular disease, and kidney disease.”125

National data said it wasn’t just our imagination or where we sat. I soon learned that though Blacks and Whites each made up a third of the kidney transplant waiting list at that time, Whites received every other donated kidney and Blacks received every fifth one, which meant that on average, Blacks waited nearly two years longer than Whites for a kidney transplant. As a primary care doctor at the time, not aware of the realities of nephrology, I didn’t know that two years could mean never having to be on dialysis at all. That two years could be the difference between surviving in body and spirit. Or not.

Though I wasn’t aware of it at the time, a small but growing body of research supported my intuition. It showed that patients similar to Mrs. Lee—over seventy-five and with serious medical problems in addition to advanced kidney disease—were as likely to live as long without dialysis as with it and often with a better quality of life. This research comes mostly from the United Kingdom, where about 15 percent of elderly patients with end-stage kidney disease die without ever starting dialysis. They have programs in place to provide conservative management—treatment aimed at minimizing symptoms of kidney failure while maximizing the quality of life remaining without dialysis.

I was fortunate I had uncovered the protein intolerance before I became too sick to research it. I only uncovered it so quickly because it had coincided with research I was doing on hypoxic kidney damage and I was aware of the link to protein in urine. Had I gone back into a state of permanent chronic fatigue, I would have needed to move in with my parents.

In late 1985, the Reagan White House blocked the use of CDC money for education, leaving the US behind other Western nations in telling its citizens how to avoid contracting the virus. Many Americans still thought you could get AIDS from a toilet seat or a glass of water. According to one poll, the majority of Americans supported quarantining AIDS patients. This heightened awareness set off waves of anxiety across the country, which was often express through jokes (Q: What do you call Rock Hudson in a wheelchair? A: Roll-AIDS!) and violence. Between the years 1985 and 1986, anti-gay violence increased by 42 percent in the US. Even in San Francisco, where Greyhound buses still dropped off gay men and women taking refuge from the prejudice of their hometowns, carloads of teenagers would drive through the Castro looking for targets. In December 1985, a group of teenagers, shouting “diseased faggot” and “you’re killing us all,” dragged a man named David Johnson from his car in a San Francisco parking lot. While his lover looked on in horror, the teenagers kicked and beat Johnson with their skateboards, breaking three of his ribs, bruising his kidneys, an gashing his face and neck with deep fingernail scratches.

As I drove, I became ever more aware of the bubble I lived in. I’d never seen a person covered by a huge blue IKEA bag sleeping on a mattress in a median before. I slowed, and angry drivers made it clear that this was not something people slowed for. In Wisconsin, if a person was found lying on the side of the road, 911 was called. People stopped. I watched the traffic barrel past, and that’s when I saw the encampment under the overpass. A jumble of tents, boxes, tarps of all shapes and sizes, and people clustered along the sidewalk. I knew now how this happened to people—you live, take out a second mortgage on your home to get through a pandemic, hire a criminal with too much eyeliner and an old perm. You trust that person, google what a kidney does and how much it’s worth.

This is how we know that Anthony Fauci was well aware of remdesivir’s toxicity when he orchestrated its approval for COVID patients. NIAID sponsored that project. Dr. Fauci had another NIAID-incubated drug, ZMapp, in the same clinical trial, testing efficacy against Ebola alongside two experimental monoclonal antibody drugs. Researchers planned to administer all four drugs to Ebola patients across Africa over a period of four to eight months.10,11 However, six months into the Ebola study, the trial’s Safety Review Board suddenly pulled both remdesivir and ZMapp from the trial.12 Remdesivir, it turned out, was hideously dangerous. Within 28 days, subjects taking remdesivir had lethal side effects including multiple organ failure, acute kidney failure, septic shock, and hypotension, and 54 percent of the remdesivir group died—the highest mortality rate among the four experimental drugs.13 Anthony Fauci’s drug, ZMapp, ran up the second-highest body count at 44 percent. NIAID was the primary funder of this study, and its researchers published the bad news about remdesivir in the New England Journal of Medicine in December 2019.

I have somatic awareness of kidney function, nutrient absorption, glandular secretions. I am even conscious of the role that neurotransmitters play in my thoughts. This state of consciousness involves mental activity more intense than in any epinephrine-boosted stress situation; part of my mind is maintaining a condition that would kill a normal mind and body within minutes. As I adjust the programming of my mind, I experience the ebb and flow of all the substances that trigger my emotional reactions, boost my attention, or subtly shape my attitudes.

The most cited experiment in this field was conducted a quarter-century ago. Researcher Benjamin Libet asked subjects to choose a random moment to perform a hand motion while hooked up to an electroencephalograph (EEG) monitor in which the so-called “readiness potential” of the brain was being monitored. Naturally, electrical signals always precede actual physical actions, but Libet wanted to know whether they also preceded a subject’s subjective feeling of intention to act. In short, is there some subjective “self ” who consciously decides things, thereby setting in motion the brain’s electrical activities that ultimately lead to the action? Or is it the other way ’round? Subjects were therefore asked to note the position of a clock’s second hand when they first felt the initial intention to move their hand. Libet’s findings were consistent, and perhaps not surprising: unconscious, unfelt, brain electrical activity occurred a full half second before there was any conscious sense of decision-making by the subject. More recent experiments by Libet, announced in 2008, analyzing separate, higher-order brain functions, have allowed his research team to predict up to ten seconds in advance which hand a subject is about to decide to raise. Ten seconds is nearly an eternity when it comes to cognitive decisions, and yet a person’s eventual decision could be seen on brain scans that long before the subject was even remotely aware of having made any decision. This and other experiments prove that the brain makes its own decisions on a subconscious level, and people only later feel that “they” have performed a conscious decision. It means that we go through life thinking that, unlike the blessedly autonomous operations of the heart and kidneys, a lever-pulling “me” is in charge of the brain’s workings. Libet concluded that the sense of personal free will arises solely from a habitual retrospective perspective of the ongoing flow of brain events.

...but the further the illness progressed the more dubious and preposterous his notions of a kidney became, and the more realistic was his awareness of impending death

You’re tiny.” He says it like an insult. “Well aware.” My eyes narrow. “So stop going for bigger moves that expose you.” He drags the tip of the dagger down his side. “A rib shot would have worked just fine.” Then he guides our hands around his back, making himself vulnerable. “Kidneys are a good fit from this angle, too.” I swallow, refusing to think of other things that are a good fit at this angle.

So although it is an extraordinary and consequential truth that we know ourselves from inside, it is an even more consequential truth that what we know is largely not material. I am not directly aware of my brain as a material object, nor of my skeleton, heart, stomach, lungs, kidneys, intestines, and all the other material things that go to make up me. Not even by an act of will can I make myself aware of most of them. Far from knowing them well, I do not know some of them at all, and have little idea how they function. I scarcely know where some of them are, still less what they look like. I am fairly sure I would be startled by the appearance of many of them, and would find the sight of them alarming, if not disgusting. A lot of people—children obviously, but many adults too—have little idea of the organs that go to make them up. In fact, the truth is that this is not what human beings think of themselves as being. I have been living in or with my body for more than eight decades now, but it has never occurred to me to think of myself as it. I own it and am in it, as a driver owns and is in a car; and in the same way what happens to it can kill me or injure me. It exerts all sorts of influences on my life, from the important to the trivial. But I am not it. At least, I have never supposed or imagined that I am.