Hawkeye Pierce Quotes

I'll carry on, carry over, carry forward, Cary Grant, cash and carry, carry me back to Old Virginia, I'll even 'hari-kari' if you show me how, but I will not carry a gun!

The world would be a far better place if more people listened to the wisdom of Hawkeye Pierce.

Hawkeye: War isn’t Hell. War is war, and Hell is Hell. And of the two, war is a lot worse. Father Mulcahy: How do you figure, Hawkeye? Hawkeye: Easy, Father. Tell me. Who goes to Hell? Father Mulcahy: Sinners, I believe. Hawkeye: Exactly. There are no innocent bystanders in Hell. War is chock full of them—little kids, cripples, old ladies. In fact, except for some of the brass, almost everybody is an innocent bystander. ~ Conversation between Hawkeye Pierce and Father Mulcahy on television series M*A*S*H

Insanity is just a state of mind.

My kidneys were expecting orange juice. Silly kidneys.

What's a man worth without love ? $.89 worth of chemicals." Hawkeye Pierce