Emotional Baggage Quotes

The past has no power to stop you from being present now. Only your grievance about the past can do that. What is grievance? The baggage of old thought and emotion.

They carried all the emotional baggage of men who might die. Grief, terror, love, longing--these were intangibles, but the intangibles had their own mass and specific gravity, they had tangible weight. They carried shameful memories. They carried the common secret of cowardice.... Men killed, and died, because they were embarrassed not to.

It seemed sometimes that life was nothing more than the accumulation of emotional baggage-memories,regrets and lost opportunities.

It’s all the same to me—a fucking red flag emblazoned with the words DO NOT BECOME EMOTIONALLY INVOLVED WITH ME, and this bed is barely big enough for my own baggage.

Forgiveness is the process of dropping off your emotional baggage.

Mindfulness is continuous undisturbed awareness of the present moment. Fully aware of here, and now, we pay attention to what is happening right in front of us, we set aside our mental and emotional baggage. To be mindful we have to re-train our mind.

Emotional baggage,” which is carried over from the past, colors our perceptions. Likewise, past conclusions and beliefs, based on reasoning that may or may not have been accurate, also tint our perception of reality. Retaining our capacity for reason is common sense, but definite conclusions and beliefs keep us from seeing life as it really is at any given moment. Emotional reactions can be unreasonable, and reason can be flawed. It’s difficult to have deep confidence in either one, especially when they’re often at war with each other. But the universal mind exists in the instant, in a moment beyond time, and it sees the universe as it literally is. It’s the universe perceiving itself. It is, moreover, something we can have absolute confidence in, and with that confidence, we can maintain a genuinely positive attitude.

But people like the doll guy who sells women and the dog guy who buys women, and other guys who, say, rape women, or maybe don’t go as far as violent rape but treat women like objects instead of people—sure, there’s a difference in the level of crime, but it’s all the same thing, where women become a canvas for throwing emotional baggage, Jackson Pollock style.

That's a really nice thought and I'm grateful for it, but there comes a point when one realizes that gratification of the flesh is only so fulfilling. It's fantastic while it lasts, but comes with so many questions of emotional baggage and doubt that frankly I begin to question whether the grief involved outweighs the satisfaction gained.

For me, it's really easy to be kind to others when I remember that none of us came into this world with a manual about how to get it all right. We are ultimately a product of our biology and environment. Consequently, I choose to be compassionate with others when I consider how much painful emotional baggage we are biologically programmed to carry around. I recognize that mistakes will be made, but this does not mean that I need to either victimize myself or take your actions and mistakes personally. Your stuff is your stuff, and my stuff is my stuff.

He did not care what the end would be, and in his lucid moments overvalued his indifference. The danger, when not seen, has the imperfect vagueness of human thought. The fear grows shadowy; and Imagination, the enemy of men, the father of all terrors, unstimulated, sinks to rest in the dullness of exhausted emotion.

This was one of those moments when I realized that my emotional baggage, once a few neatly packed pieces, was now like the Joads' truck, stacked high with old clothes, half a rocking chair, a mule, all barely secured with twine.

I don't know if it's the terrible pain from my shouler or the weight of his emotional baggage, but I feel like I'm losing all sense of reality.

Women were for recreation. On a job, they got in the way and fogged things up with sex and hurt feelings and all the emotional baggage they carried around. One had to look out for them and take care of them.

She called it baggage. "You're scared to open your suitcases and see what your mother packed.

She was so emotional, on the verge of tears. This was what I'd wanted to prevent with all those quick disappearances, the tangledness of farewells and all the baggage they brought with them. But now, looking at Deb, I realized what else I'd given up: knowing for sure that someone was going to miss me. What happened to goodbye, Michael in Westcott had written on my Ume.com page. I was pretty sure I knew, now. It had been packed away in a box of its own, trying to be forgotten, until I really needed it. Until now.

I don't have the emotional capacity to navigate the minefield of your fucked up baggage.

You realize it's not wooden stakes that kill vampires. It's all the emotional baggage and letdowns they have to carry around for century after century.

You could never 'toss' your emotional baggage. You could only store it in an overhead compartment that might burst open at any given moment.

If you push kids too hard, too young, they will quit forever. Parents should never burden their kids with their unfulfilled ambitions, frustrations, anxiety, or any other form of emotional baggage. The parents’ support must be consistent. The most important thing is that the child gets the experience—win, lose, or draw—without judgment.

Heartache purged layers of baggage I didn’t know I carried. Gifts hide under the layers of grief.

Please remember that, no one is ever going to carry your overloaded emotional and mental baggage. You only have to find a way to reduce it.

What was there to worry about? It's not like I was an active aquaphobic carrying nine years of emotional baggage onto a boat held together by duct tape.

Simply put, your pain body is the same thing as your unresolved emotional baggage.

After a bad trip, don't carry your luggage on board the next flight. Stay grounded til you figure out a new way to travel.

Mindfulness works with continuous awareness of body, breath; feelings, thoughts, intentions. Our state of mind, our positive or negative attitude towards the world, is closely related to our experiences of happiness or suffering. Mindfulness is awareness of everything that is happening in the moment of 'Now'. Mindfulness is a self development technique that will change the focus of our mind towards happiness. Mindfulness is continuous undisturbed awareness of the present moment. Fully aware of here, and now, we pay attention to what is happening right in front of us, we set aside our mental and emotional baggage. To be mindful we have to re-train our mind.

Remember when your curiosity inspired your investigative mind to explore and learn… you weren’t bogged down with resentment, cynicism, and emotional baggage… just think about how great it would be to return to that mindset of unencumbered learning and adventurous living… you are just one choice away from that life… choose to let go of the infertile past… go live your adventure!

c’mon, delete all negative thoughts, Carole, release the past and look to the future with positivity and the lightness of a child unencumbered by emotional baggage life is an adventure to be embraced with an open mind and loving heart

In our unpacking process, we must own it before we can disown it!" EL

I use Facebook to broadcast my intellectual luggage". ~R. Alan Woods [2012]

I want a real relationship, one without intimacy issues; without trust issues, but with all my emotional baggage, I don't know if that's possible.

May you never feel the weight of your emotional baggage.

My therapist has helped me learn to understand that if you don't unpack your own emotional baggage it's no longer baggage--it's deadweight.

Those who do not know emotional baggage also do not know about the tribulations of the world. But those who do not learn to cope with its burdens also forget about its beauty.

They both had emotional baggage, and every reason in the world to be afraid, but they chose each other anyways, and I think that’s kind of beautiful.

We both know it doesn’t work like that,” he says so softly only I can hear. “As much as we want it to be the character’s emotions, it’s still going to be my arms around you, and my mouth on yours. Now, I feel pretty weird about that considering all our baggage could fill a goddamn department store, but since you seem cool not discussing anything, let’s crack this fucking thing open and see what falls out.

You can find God, make as much money as God or be as good-looking as God, and you'll still need to figure out a way to pack the emotional baggage you were handed when you were a kid.

Using the Emotion Code is a journey, intended to help you chip away at your emotional baggage until you feel in charge of your emotions and are creating the reality you want to experience.

the ability to allow or even make room for reactivity in the other, without reciprocating, creates the best chance that both partners can go on to their next relationships with the least amount of emotional baggage.

Danny seemed nice. But it was the nice guys you had to watch out for. The mean ones, they wore their crimes on their sleeves, carting them around with all their messy emotional baggage. Nice guys buried things deep.

They may have all had suitcases three times as big as mine, but I realized that the emotional baggage I’d brought with me was big enough to put theirs to shame. It was a little lighter, though, now that I was leaving.

We use our minds in a way similar to how we use a scale - it tells us its worth, its value. But what if the scale has not been accurately recalibrated to zero? What if you had forgotten to remove mental and emotional baggage?

There comes a time when you have to drop your burdens in order to fight for yourself and your dreams. Many of us carry baggage from the past that hinders our ability to fight for the things we want in life, our goals, our dreams. If you learn in this book to let go of those burdensome emotions and memories, then one of my chief objectives will be realized; you will be able to pursue and live your dreams.

Everyone comes with baggage, make sure you get one that comes with a rack

He was really trying to be my friend, without all the emotional baggage we both carried - mine still with me, but carefully folded in vacuum bags so they'd occupy as little room as possible and his, hangin on his shoulders like lead armor, making him slouch sometimes. And yet, as pinned down as he was, he was the one comforting me, supporting not only his weight but mine, too. It wasn't fair.

That’s a really nice thought–” I sighed “–and I’m grateful for it, but there comes a point when one realises that gratification of the flesh is only so fulfilling. It’s fantastic while it lasts, but comes with so many questions of emotional baggage and doubt that frankly I begin to question whether the grief involved outweighs the satisfaction gained.

Negative emotions are heavy baggage that slowly burns you down

Running a marathon with a backpack is tough and may hinder you from winning the race. Don’t let the baggage from your past - heavy with fear, guilt, and anger - slow you down.

We have to slowly train ourselves to stop living in the past and set aside the emotional baggage we carry.

Sometimes travelling is all about unloading that emotional baggage: the ones which are unspoken of.

Older guys have too much emotional baggage. They’ve already lived their lives.

This is the first real conversation we're having and already I'm burdening you with my emotional baggage.

Our attention plus the attachment to negative conditions that we may be experiencing adds weight to our emotional baggage.

Where I can't take you along with me, I stuff my emotional baggage with your words and unpack them slowly, a bit all the way, till I return.

Everyone has emotional baggage. Some have a small carry-on while others lug a steamer trunk.

If you leave emotional baggage lying around, you trip all over it when you're trying to get from one place to another.

It seemed sometimes that life was nothing more than the accumulation of emotional baggage—memories, regrets, and lost opportunities.

We found out that day, fairly quickly, how great and complex our fondness was for each other; I also had my first sense of something central about Caroline that would become a pillar of our friendship. When she was confronted with any emotional difficulty, however slight or major, her response as to approach rather than to flee. There she would stay until the matter was resolved, and the emotional aftermath was free of any hangover or recrimination. My instincts toward resolution were similar: I knew that silence and distance were far more pernicious than head-on engagement. This compatibility helped to ensure that there was no unclaimed baggage between us in the years to come.

Only, in the end, you will realize. Among all the baggage you carried all your life, you didn't own most of them. And the remaining weren't as important as you always thought or expected it to be.

They were tough. They carried all the emotional baggage of men who might die. Grief, terror, love, longing—these were intangibles, but the intangibles had their own mass and specific gravity, they had tangible weight.

HAZEL WASN’T PROUD OF CRYING. After the tunnel collapsed, she wept and screamed like a two-year-old throwing a tantrum. She couldn’t move the debris that separated her and Leo from the others. If the earth shifted any more, the entire complex might collapse on their heads. Still, she pounded her fists against the stones and yelled curses that would’ve earned her a mouth-washing with lye soap back at St. Agnes Academy. Leo stared at her, wide-eyed and speechless. She wasn’t being fair to him. The last time the two of them had been together, she’d zapped him into her past and shown him Sammy, his great-grandfather—Hazel’s first boyfriend. She’d burdened him with emotional baggage he didn’t need, and left him so dazed they had almost gotten killed by a giant shrimp monster. Now here they were, alone again, while their friends might be dying at the hands of a monster army, and she was throwing a fit. “Sorry.” She wiped her face. “Hey, you know…” Leo shrugged. “I’ve attacked a few rocks in my day.” She swallowed with difficulty. “Frank is…he’s—” “Listen,” Leo said. “Frank Zhang has moves. He’s probably gonna turn into a kangaroo and do some marsupial jujitsu on their ugly faces.” He helped her to her feet. Despite the panic simmering inside her, she knew Leo was right. Frank and the others weren’t helpless. They would find a way to survive. The best thing she and Leo could do was carry on. She studied Leo. His hair had grown out longer and shaggier, and his face was leaner, so he looked less like an imp and more like one of those willowy elves in the fairy tales. The biggest difference was his eyes. They constantly drifted, as if Leo was trying to spot something over the horizon. “Leo, I’m sorry,” she said. He raised an eyebrow. “Okay. For what?” “For…” She gestured around her helplessly. “Everything. For thinking you were Sammy, for leading you on. I mean, I didn’t mean to, but if I did—” “Hey.” He squeezed her hand, though Hazel sensed nothing romantic in the gesture. “Machines are designed to work.” “Uh, what?” “I figure the universe is basically like a machine. I don’t know who made it, if it was the Fates, or the gods, or capital-G God, or whatever. But it chugs along the way it’s supposed to most of the time. Sure, little pieces break and stuff goes haywire once in a while, but mostly…things happen for a reason. Like you and me meeting.” “Leo Valdez,” Hazel marveled, “you’re a philosopher.” “Nah,” he said. “I’m just a mechanic. But I figure my bisabuelo Sammy knew what was what. He let you go, Hazel. My job is to tell you that it’s okay. You and Frank—you’re good together. We’re all going to get through this. I hope you guys get a chance to be happy. Besides, Zhang couldn’t tie his shoes without your help.” “That’s mean,” Hazel chided, but she felt like something was untangling inside her—a knot of tension she’d been carrying for weeks. Leo really had changed. Hazel was starting to think she’d found a good friend. “What happened to you when you were on your own?” she asked. “Who did you meet?” Leo’s eye twitched. “Long story. I’ll tell you sometime, but I’m still waiting to see how it shakes out.” “The universe is a machine,” Hazel said, “so it’ll be fine.” “Hopefully.” “As long as it’s not one of your machines,” Hazel added. “Because your machines never do what they’re supposed to.” “Yeah, ha-ha.” Leo summoned fire into his hand. “Now, which way, Miss Underground?” Hazel scanned the path in front of them. About thirty feet down, the tunnel split into four smaller arteries, each one identical, but the one on the left radiated cold. “That way,” she decided. “It feels the most dangerous.” “I’m sold,” said Leo. They began their descent.

My wife has always been my beloved mean girl, she fires emotional bullets when she’s pissed or upset. Not so much in the last years, not since she’s gotten a grip of her anxiety and dealt with a lot of her emotional baggage. I love her fucking mean. Not even lying when I say it makes me hard as stone. I love fucking her when she’s mad. But this is different. She won’t want me on top of her when she knows the secret I’ve been keeping.

When the weeks have built up with frustration and immense stress and one of your co-workers, a manager or an employee triggers irritation or angers you, knowing how to respond in a mindful way can pay huge dividends. Knowing how to not take other people’s emotional baggage personally and intuitively sensing when to bring up concerns and when not to is an expression of emotional intelligence. This is all possible if we are being truly mindful.

I wasn't in the habit of saying no. If I went around saying no, then they'd be mad at me. Disappointed. Unhappy. I couldn't tolerate that. That kind of audacity belonged to other people like guys and hot women with no emotional baggage.

You got a lot of baggage?” Hank asked with a drawl. I shrugged and smiled lightly. “Does emotional count?” He chuckled under his breath. “Well, I’d say it does, but that’s not something I can carry for you, young lady. I’m sure it’s heavy, but you make sure you unpack that bag first,” Hank said, giving me a wink. I couldn’t help but love the man immediately. Jake’s

And then there was this pest of a girl. He sighed. Women were for recreation. On a job, they got in the way and fogged things up with sex and hurt feelings and all the emotional baggage they carried around. One had to look out for them and take care of them.

They say, “It’s not what you walk away from, it’s what you walk away with.” Many of us have walked away from toxic relationships, but we have walked away with a broken heart, emotional baggage, scars of abuse, mistrust, depression, addiction, and low self-esteem.

Conflict is messy. We are messy. We’re human, and we’re each carrying our own heavy baggage—from life, from childhood, from previous relationships. We have triggers that get set off. Big emotions that grab us by the throat, or the heart, or the gut—wherever you feel it when you get flooded.

Our tendency to cling to the stuff of this world pushes us to drag our things—physical possessions, emotional baggage, old assumptions, and habitual reactions—through every transition. It is hard to contemplate letting go, let alone letting go of absolutely everything, as we cross the street of mortality. No wonder we think of change as the enemy!

A Black woman isn't justifiably upset, she's angry. A Latinx person confronts someone, they're fiery or feisty. I don't like raising my voice in public, Max. There's too much baggage associated with it. A woman gets emotional in the workplace, she's irrational and not fit for leadership. I was fired for being overly emotional in a male-dominated space.

Live light. Offload internal and external baggage for peace within and peace without.

Baggage is just the lies you tell yourself about the way things are. Those lies clutter up and obscure a clear perception of the world and other people.

Please tell me the other four don't come with so much baggage.

Take out the garbage...true happiness comes from within not from without!

The past has no power to stop you from being present now. Only your grievance about the past can do that. And what is a grievance? The baggage of old thought and emotion.

Don't let your past pollute your present and disable you from progressing in the future.

Their lives were now less than a footnote in history. As gone, as utterly forgotten as any random individual from the Middle Ages. No longer even a ripple in time, except to the extent that I could keep their memories alive. I sighed to myself. It seemed sometimes that life was nothing more than the accumulation of emotional baggage—memories, regrets, and lost opportunities.

There is a subconscious, emotional level that informs playing, and since I’m the kind of person who carries his baggage around internally, nothing has ever helped me tap into my feelings more.

If we think of our life as a journey [...] we don't want to move into our future lugging along the heavy baggage of our past. One way to lighten the load is to work on forgiveness and acceptance.

When we forgive, our emotions evolve and reveal the futility of carrying the baggage of anger, antipathy, hostility and hatred. We emerge out of those dark corridors of fear, angst and insecurity.

To this day, I remain awestruck by the fact that human beings are capable of this type of metamorphosis. We don’t have to stay stuck displaying the same personality traits over the course of our lifetime but are free to transform into higher expressions of ourselves. Today I can honestly say that I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that human beings are capable of making radical and lasting change. After a decade of coaching individuals and leading groups, I have discovered that if I don’t buy into people’s perceptions of who they are and what they are capable of, I can bypass their public personas and see who they are in their highest expression. With a little effort, I can see their magnificence and their potential no matter what they look like or what condition their emotional, spiritual, or financial world is in. I can see through their acts, their personas, their fears and insecurities. I can see who they are apart from the baggage they carry around. The undeniable fact is that underneath all of our public personas, we already are that which we desire to be. Our only job is to see past our own limitations so that we can return to that which we already are.

Before you go expecting men to treat you like Ivanka Trump, get your life in order. If you want more out of the men that approach you, first demand more out of yourself. Investing in education leads to more money, working out leads to a healthy body, and dealing with your emotional baggage leads to a happier you. All of those things contribute to high self-esteem, and you will never reach your potential without a full tank of that.

My job as a therapist is to help victims of trauma understand that they are not to blame. They are not responsible for the bad things that happened to them as children, nor are they responsible for the personal problems that developed as a result. What they are responsible for is fixing those problems. This can only be done by bravely facing the past, identifying the effects that the past has on the present, and working through all the painful emotional baggage.- Scared Selfless

It is nearly impossible to feel anything negative in here. Because you’re really connected, to everything, here… but it’s only meant to be a temporary sanctuary, a place to remember yourself. In time you’ll want your negative thoughts, your emotional baggage back, and you’ll have hopefully bolstered yourself enough with the Sanctum’s reminder of your Source that you can come out with fresh perspective. When you’ve had enough of it, you’ll know, and then come and join us outside.

The realization that my grandmother, mother and I are one in the same awakens something mysterious inside of me. The person I am, someone I believe has more opportunities than my mom and grandmother in matters of work, relationships and love is true, yet I am still acting out old belief patterns. I am no better or smarter than either one of them. Our basic needs and emotions in life are the similar. Our experiences differ, but we are one and the same. This conscious awakening is surreal.

But I don't want to take responsibility of your emotional baggage. That's up to you, when you walk through a hall, because that then determines what and how we listen to certain things. I may feel sorrowful, or happy, or exhilarated, or angry when I play certain pieces of music, but I'm not necessarily wanting you to feel exactly the same thing. So please, the next time you go to a concert, just allow your body to open up, allow your body to be this resonating chamber. Be aware that you're not going to experience the same thing as the performer is.

We don’t have to understand someone’s pain to make room for it. We don’t have to know what someone is carrying to decide whether or not their emotional state is justified. We can just be glad that they’re with us and let them know that they’re safe as they are, baggage and all.

It does seem that the more in tune you are with life, the more you live in the present day, the less emotional baggage you carry with you in your daily life, and the happier the relationship you had with whoever it was who died, the more easy, surprisingly, it is to feel sad – and then move on. But the more loss a relationship contained, and the more emotionally uncomfortable the bereaved person is with his own life anyway, the worse can be the effect of a death. [...] Since people tend to mourn bad relationships more than good ones, and because of the confused feelings of guilt involved, they may over-compensate to make up for their bad feelings.

It’s way easier and more “comfortable” to stew in anger and resentment, for example, than to practice forgiveness. But the former will keep you mired in unwholesome thoughts and feelings, while the latter will open the door to true transformation and make you strong. “Anyone can hold a grudge,” Doe Zantamata wrote, “but it takes a person with character to forgive. When you forgive, you release yourself from a painful burden. Forgiveness doesn’t mean what happened was okay, and it doesn’t mean that person should still be welcome in your life. It just means that you have made peace with the pain, and are ready to let it go.”When we let go of unnecessary emotional baggage, we are, quite simply, freer on every level.

...I couldn't let go of her hand. For a few moments, I looked at the shape of it, the roundness of her fingers. I realized that her hands gave me a sense of comfort because they were the most familiar part of her to me. Those hands had always been in my sight when I was a child. Those were the hands I held crossing the street, the hands that made me lunch and cooked me dinner, the hands that stroked me when I was feeling sad, the hands on the steering wheel driving me all over town, the hands whose rings I had looked at and played with, turning them around on her finger. I knew then that regardless of how we had fought and cried and how adoption had affected us both, those hands, free of words and emotional baggage, encompassed everything. They were pure love-all the love that she had for me.

The words "I should have done this back then" are a curse. Whenever they come up, they tangle around your heart and keep you from moving. They bring up all the baggage you carry and dull your emotions. From this point on is a domain where your emotions can't be dull... "I want to get faster", "I want to beat him", "This is fun"... "I want to move forward". You need to have only pure feelings like that, if you want to reach that domain!

children whose parents have been unfaithful are often pressured to become the caretaker of the betrayed parent, thus adding to the son’s or daughter’s emotional stress. Young children may be unable to articulate their anger, anxiety, and confusion. They might act out, regress, or withdraw. And when an adult child’s family baggage includes lies, cheating, and the breaking of promises, they may have a particularly hard time navigating the rough waters of dating and marriage.

FOR MOST OF us, failure comes with baggage—a lot of baggage—that I believe is traced directly back to our days in school. From a very early age, the message is drilled into our heads: Failure is bad; failure means you didn’t study or prepare; failure means you slacked off or—worse!—aren’t smart enough to begin with. Thus, failure is something to be ashamed of. This perception lives on long into adulthood, even in people who have learned to parrot the oft-repeated arguments about the upside of failure. How many articles have you read on that topic alone? And yet, even as they nod their heads in agreement, many readers of those articles still have the emotional reaction that they had as children. They just can’t help it: That early experience of shame is too deep-seated to erase. All the time in my work, I see people resist and reject failure and try mightily to avoid it, because regardless of what we say, mistakes feel embarrassing. There is a visceral reaction to failure: It hurts.

All of us carry around countless bags of dusty old knickknacks dated from childhood: collected resentments, long lists of wounds of greater or lesser significance, glorified memories, absolute certainties that later turn out to be wrong. Humans are emotional pack rats. These bags define us. My baggage made me someone I did not want to be: a cringing girl, a sensitive plant, a needy greedy sort of thing. I began, at an early age, to try to rid myself of my bags. I began to construct a new role. I made a plan. When I was six, I wrote it down with my green calligraphy pen and buried it in the backyard. My plan: To get thin. To be great. To get out.

To be a pioneer of your own life, living an existence that has purpose and meaning you must first remove the past baggage that takes up space in all of your body, home and surroundings. Clean out the core soul clutter of built up three dimensional pathways to allow yourself the energy to overcome, heal and outgrow what no longer is. We are taught that our realities are a reflection of our thoughts and emotions and that we can alter anything with the law of attraction and i couldn't disagree more. Its so much deeper than that, it'd be insanity if it were that simple. Thoughts are powerful, i believe that much but without practical steps, vision and risks towards something that sets your soul on fire; changes and adverse situations to try distract you from your truth; words are just words and the meaning we give them can vary from person to person. We attract what we give focus to, we collide with the energy we hold within ourselves, we are constant mirrors of a bio product of the enviroment in which we have not only created but accepted or tolerated, regardless of what we percieve our circumstances to be. When you can sit with that truth and hold yourself accountable for your part in the unfolding of your journey you will come to a realization of self that will guide you all the way home. Becoming a pioneer is mastering self in few aspects within the human conciousness, be the change, let the way you live be your story.

Come here.” Without regard for modesty, she pulled off her T-shirt and wadded it up to stanch his wounds. He splayed his fingers on her bare stomach and grinned. “Honey, I’m afraid I can’t help you with that right now. Maybe later?” How could he joke and flirt when she was so afraid? “Max. You’re bleeding. Maybe dying. I don’t want to lose you.” “Come. Here.” He grabbed her and pulled her down into the grass beside him. He pressed a kiss to her temple and rubbed his grizzled cheek against hers. The sirens were getting closer. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?” “I’m fine. You’re the one who got shot. Twice.” “I’m gonna live through both. I’m a tough guy, remember?” “Damn it, Max—” “Rosemary March. Did you just swear? You know I don’t like hearing that from you,” he teased. He pulled her in for a kiss that lasted until a groan of pain forced him to come up for air. “You get under my skin, Rosie.” “Like an itchy rash?” she teased. “Like an alarm clock finally waking me up to the life I’m supposed to have. With you.” So when did the tough guy learn to speak such beautiful things? Tears stung her eyes again as she found a spot where she could hug him without causing any pain. “I know I’m not the guy you expected to want you like this, and I know you weren’t the woman I was looking for. Hell, I wasn’t even looking.” “Neither was I.” “But we found each other.” “We’re good for each other.” “I’m not an easy man to live with. I come with a lot of emotional baggage.” “And I don’t?” “You can do better than me.” Rosie shook her head, smiling. “I can’t do better than a good man who loves me. A man who encourages me to be myself and to be strong and who makes me feel safer and more loved than I have ever felt in my life.” “I do love you, Rosie.” “I love you, Max.” “What are we going to do about these feelings?” Max asked. “What do you want to do?” " Let’s give the Dinkles something to talk about.” “You’re moving in upstairs?” “And opening all the windows.” Rosie smiled. “Oh, I hope we give them plenty to talk about.

When working on turning your life around, if you don't have structure, a foundation of others who keep you accountable, you won't be able to build a strong foundation for yourself. If you don't develop your emotions the right way, it's easy to get thrown off course. Keep your head clear, learn to deal with your issues head on, responsibly. Remember to keep in mind that you will be dealing with all types of emotions, situations and obstacles when facing your daily living. There will be a lot of baggage from the past to unpack, sort through and throw out. The important thing is to stay patient, keep the faith and listen to those around you who have succeeded. Let go of everything that you think you know so you can learn everything that you really need to know to have a great life. If you are serious about changing your life, it will show in your actions, the people you surround yourself with and the places that you choose to go. Just remember when you were down, you were ready to do anything to get your life on track the right way! Keep your focus on living a new way of life and I promise you that you will be happy that you stayed the course!

An example can clarify this point. Suppose in our childhood we had role models who demeaned or ridiculed us rather than teaching us how to live and how to flourish. Such an experience will undoubtedly influence the development of our character. Self-inhibiting thought patterns and negative emotions such as hate, anger, and anxiety are likely to shape who we become. But these negative thought patterns and maladaptive emotions are not hermetically sealed off in the mind. Our thoughts lead to action, or abstention of action, and action is a bodily phenomenon. Emotions are felt in the mind but they also have a somatic form of expression and this expression influences the structure of our body. The baggage of our youth will not just weigh us down psychologically, but it can also weigh us down physically and inhibit the functioning of our body, or as Lowen explains: “If a person has a strong and secure sense of himself, he will naturally stand erect. If he is frightened, he will tend to cower. If he is sad or depressed, his body will droop. If he is trying to deny or compensate for inner feelings of insecurity, he will stand like a martinet, and his posture will be unnaturally rigid. Alexander Lowen, The Spirituality of the Body

When someone is judging you, it's unlikely that their judgment is actually about you. As I see it, we're all carrying around a bunch of suitcases. We have our insecurities suitcase. We have our stress suitcase. We have our guilt and our worries suitcases. Some suitcases we might have been carrying since our childhood, stories we were told about who we are that aren't even true. They're fiction that we were handed, picked up, believed, and still carry. Sometimes a person comes along with one of their suitcases, with their issues all packed up and ready to go, and they try to hand it to us. Do not pick up that suitcase! Do not pick it up! Because if you pick up their suitcase, you will be up all night, worrying if what they said about you is true, stressing yourself out, questioning yourself, getting bitter, and feeding your insecurities. Over a suitcase that never belonged to you in the first place. So if people keep trying to hand off their suitcases to you like you're a bellhop, you might need to break up with them the same way you would break off an unhealthy relationship with an emotionally abusive boyfriend. And as you go through life, trying to figure out how to ferry around those suitcases that do belong to you (and we all have our own stuff . . . the stuffiest of stuffs!), don't try to hand those off to someone else as a way to try to get rid of your pain. Instead, sit down with a friend or a great therapist and have a big, nonjudgmental "let's unpack these suitcases together" session.

When this spot is active, your spiritual awareness is awakened and you are attuned to the universe. You live in the present, and you have no emotional baggage that ties you to the past. You know when to let go.

The new scientific outlook of Darwin’s evolution and Ernst Mach’s physics had demonstrated to all concerned that there was no heaven above, only an open, empty sky.‡ “Metaphysical reality” was a self-contradiction.12 Science had left Western man standing alone on an empty train platform, with all the emotional and intellectual baggage left by a Christianity that had been based on a myth and had absorbed a lie: Plato’s assertion that man had a “higher” rational self, when all it was was his own fear of life.

Leave yesterday’s emotional baggage behind and live your best life today. Tomorrow is never ours!

I’m sort of nervous you’ll find out Even though I want you to I’m sort of nervous you’ll be angry Even though I know that’s not you We’ve been through this all before And you never made me feel unsure But still A hush had fallen over the crowd as soon as she began to sing and Julie marveled at how different this atmosphere was from the raucous one the boys had described to her from their visit to the club. She wondered if Caleb would be satisfied with her slow and emotional song choice but if he was dissatisfied with her he didn’t show it on his face. He merely glanced around at the rapt expressions of the lifers and smirked. Julie allowed her eyes to slide over to her friends who were both watching her with knowing looks. She knew that the sadness in her lyrics was reflected in their eyes, that they felt sorry for her and that they ached for Luke too. She forced her gaze away from them, needing to focus on getting through the song and finding it almost impossible in the face of their pity. I’m sort of hopeful you’ll find out Even though that’s not fair I’m sort of hopeful you'll guess Even though I’m so scared I don’t know what the right choice is And part of me wants you to insist But still Despite all of the circumstances that made singing this particular song in this particular venue absolutely loaded down with baggage she found herself slipping into the zone she always occupied when performing. She could feel the heady rush of doing what she was meant to do in front of people hanging on her every word. She wished Luke was there to sing with her but she had also never been so glad that he wasn’t. She gripped the mic stand and raised her voice to new heights as she began the chorus. How do I tell you this isn’t where I belong? How do I tell you this was a tragedy all along? That we never had a chance At a happy ending at all Just a few brief stolen moments Between your heart and mine How do I tell you? How do I tell you? Goodbye She could hear emotion breaking through into her voice but she didn’t care. The ghost band once again seemed to sense what she had heard in her head and the music built and built before suddenly dropping to next to nothing. A few chords on the piano were all that accompanied the final verse as she gave it her all. I’m sort of happy we happened Even though I know the memories Will hurt I’m sort of happy we met here Even if it took a curse I know that I’ve made mistakes And some of them are hard to shake But still Julie allowed herself to truly see the audience for the first time. They were still watching her with awed expressions but something about the lighting in the club seemed different. There was a soft golden glow settling over the whole room. Julie blinked and the glow was gone. She barely had time to wonder if she had imagined it before the band came back in full force for the final chorus. How do I tell you this isn’t where I belong? How do I tell you this was a tragedy all along? That we never had a chance At a happy ending at all Just a few brief stolen moments Between your heart and mine How do I tell you? How do I tell you? Goodbye The band fell away again and Julie’s voice echoed through the ballroom alone on the final lines. How do I tell you? Goodbye

I love everything I do, and I fully invest myself emotionally into the people and the activities I love. I used to not be this way. I used to hate the emotional baggage that came from loving someone or something so much that it hurt. But stumbling upon a quote from Mother Teresa once, I realized just how flawed that approach was. ‘I have found the paradox,’ she says, ‘That if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.’...I love Amor Vincit Omnia. I love it so much because it never stops holding true. Love conquers all, and it does it again and again. Love conquers me every single day.

Because deep down and buried under piles and piles of emotional baggage, I knew I was falling in love. Three times over.

I can no longer be a doormat for a broken man to dump his emotional baggage on when he refuses to even attempt to help himself.

Two things must happen to partake in this mindset of non-judging so that we can start dealing with stress better and gain greater well-being. Don't get angry at the little weirdo doing its thing. Be like, "whatever I don’t mind." Continue to bring your attention back to the song that you play. Feel the sound vibration. When you meditate, all kinds of thoughts and experiences will come up. Patience: understanding that growth happens in its own time. The mantra therapy session will clear your head and make you happier and brighter and relaxed and free of anxieties–these results are pretty instant. Yet, the meditation's long-term objectives including self-realization, liberation from fate, jumping out of the reincarnation loop... those don't happen overnight. We have a lot of karmic baggage from who knows how many lifetimes of gazillions. Don't overemphasize development. Be rest assured it will happen. Beginner’s mind: a mind that is willing to see everything as it is for the first time. The cornerstone of mindfulness practice lets us catch the "extraordinariness of the ordinary" of our perceptions of the present-moment.  This mentality encourages us to "be able to see everything as if it were the first time" Critical for practicing and participating in organized meditation practices, such as body scan, yoga, meditation, this sort of open-mindedness to new experiences "helps us to be receptive to new ideas and keeps us from getting stuck in the rut of our own wisdom, which often thinks it knows more than it does." They have no assumptions resulting from past experiences with the mind of the beginner.  This reminds us that every single moment, by definition, has unique possibilities.  The subconscious of the novice is working as de-clutterer.  With it, we can see, witness, hear, and learn of our universe's beings, places, and stuff, as they really are and in the moment.  Our ideas, feelings and desires no longer filter or place a curtain on our everyday lives. Trust – No Imitations, Live Own Life, and Honor Own Feelings, Intuitions, Wisdom, and Goodness An integral part of the training and practice of mindfulness includes the development of a simple trust in yourself and emotions.  Guidance comes from within you— your own instincts, your own strength.  The foundation involves looking inward rather than outward.  Your mindset here indicates that you value your own fundamental intelligence and goodness.  Your thoughts are honored.  An analogy here may be linked to backing off a stretch during yoga practice.  The mindfulness ethic "accentuates being your own human and knowing what it means to be yourself" Being your own individual means you are not mimicking someone else.

Lisa Clampitt, the matchmaker in New York who used to be a social worker, told me that often what seems like "chemistry" might be emotional baggage from childhood. That's why if she sees a client repeatedly going after men who aren't working out, she looks at the psychological roots of the attraction.

SoulBlazing is a practice for blazing through your emotional baggage so that you can live a more purposeful life that’s aligned with your Authentic Self.

Contemplation cultivates an inner connection, an awareness of yourself. I don’t mean your emotional self; I mean the part of you hidden beneath your emotional baggage—your soul’s consciousness.

Dating a person fresh out of a relationship is the worst thing to do. If someone is just out of a relationship, they haven’t taken the time to reflect on their past relationship, learn from their mistakes and properly heal from it so they will more than likely bring over trauma and emotional baggage which becomes your trauma and baggage.

If you hang on tightly to past memories, you might miss out on the life God wants you living today! Yes, it takes courage to let go of the weights you have carried around for years—whether those are actual, physical things (such as clothes, cars, jewelry, or houses) or intangible weights (relationships, bad habits, wrong thinking, or emotional baggage). It’s time to clean out your mind. Then your hands will be free to hold the good things God has for you. The new things He wants to give you!

The Dark Cloud Is the emotional baggage that you got from the hatred and hostility you were dealt because you tried to succeed Is the short end of the stick that outsiders receive even though they are the ones who lead Is the mental health crisis of your close family members because they went through war Is the appalling behavior of jealous fools who choose to keep score

Deep spiritual relationships often come with baggage. There are intense emotions involved both in this life and previous ones, which can affect both partners. These connections are designed to test your boundaries and will often cause intense pain and heartache.

pulled away, should’ve reminded him that they were just friends—but despite what she should do, she just couldn’t bring herself to do it. Her emotions had run away with her, but falling into Luke’s embrace helped her to still herself once again. Because their kiss just felt so… Right. That was the only word for it. And even though all the relationships that had come before had fizzled out—or even ended in disaster—maybe this one would be different. Was she a fool for hoping, for believing that something in her life might actually work out for once? After all, he had initiated the kiss. So did that mean he was willing to overlook all the extra baggage she came with? As a soon-to-be single mom she wasn’t exactly traveling light, either. He’d chosen to trust her with his secret and had never pressed her to share more of her past than she willingly offered. He made her smile, made her put all her worries aside whenever he took her in his arms. And Deborah and Charlie could sense how much Luke meant to her despite Mandy’s incessant denial. Charlie even picked up on her crush despite being thousands of miles away. It had all added up to this moment right now. She could either deepen their kiss, allow herself to fall face forward into the very real possibility of love—or she could pull away, pretend it never happened, remind Luke that they were really better off as friends, point out that he was way too good for her, besides… Mandy brought her hands up to Luke’s shoulders and gently pushed him away. “I’m sorry,” he said reflexively. His handsome features pressed into a frown. “Don’t be.” Mandy swung her legs up onto the couch and repositioned herself into a semi-reclined position. “I just wanted to get more comfortable, before…” She giggled nervously and silently cursed herself. Why couldn’t act sexy for once, instead of her usual silly and girlish self?

Fuck everyone else, I want to say, for burdening the two of us with all their baggage. Let's go back to minding our own business, anything but this. Who cares about our family? What have they ever done but keep us alive only to make us feel like shit?

In my first book, The Emotion Code, I explained how your subconscious mind, your vastly intelligent inner self, knows all about the “emotional baggage” you are holding on to. The Emotion Code provides a way for you to find and remove your own trapped emotions, the emotional baggage that has been disrupting your life, creating physical, mental, and emotional symptoms.

My soul belongs to you. Even if sometimes, I wish like hell it didn’t.” I don’t know whether I mean that or not. Sometimes, it probably would be easier to be free from her. With us, there is so much emotional baggage. But it’s like I am a genie stuck in a bottle.

Hot single dad with more emotional baggage than London Heathrow Airport during Christmas? Check.

On being Single. How many times have we heard people asking “So why are you single?” “Oh no! What happened!?” I haven’t heard anyone ask “So why are you in a relationship? Oh no what happened?!” As if being in a relationship is a standard of happiness or the only way to be “in” and being single is a “curse” of some sort. Now let’s change the narrative. Maybe this “single” person chose not to carry the emotional baggage and shit of other people. Maybe she was able to finally gather her courage and leave the demon in hell. OR… maybe that person is just really happy on her own, has a good relationship with herself and provides her own happiness. Many a partner isn’t a necessity for her but just an option. Maybe she feels COMPLETE just by being with herself. Maybe she is her own HERO and rather than be stoned — her strength and independence should be CELEBRATED. May we learn to upgrade our mindset, transform our mental landscape and overcome limiting beliefs. EYO! (Educate Your Opinion) and peace!

Why wait for someone else to make you feel good? And that’s why it’s so deeply important that we heal ourselves, taking charge of that process instead of shifting blame and responsibility to a partner. If we’re trying to fill an old void, we’ll choose the wrong partner. A partner can’t fill every gap. They can’t unpack our emotional baggage for us. Once we fulfill our own needs, we’re in a better place to see what a relationship can give us.

Plato warned that pursuing pleasure leads to unhappiness. The Buddha taught that desires can never be satisfied. Every religion provides advice about how to get off the hedonic treadmill, leaving its emotional baggage behind. However, such advice is like advice about diets: correct, well-meaning, plentiful, and, for good evolutionary reasons, well-nigh impossible to actually follow.

And that is for the condescending, stuck up, winter fae attitude. Your mate deserves better than a prick who can’t even deal with his own emotional baggage.

As it turns out, my emotional baggage is the only thing that doesn’t require bubble wrap.

A foundation of healing is built on the promise that God will be your strength. He is in the midst of this healing process with you—right where you are. With all your baggage. With your broken heart. With your messy emotions. With your faith and love for Him, in spite of the pain that just won’t go away. All that is required of you is to accept what He so willingly offers.

There is not a one-size-fits-all approach to living life, resolving the emotional baggage you carry or accepting the truth of being an eternal soul.

Mid May 2012 Andy wrote in his Email reply: Dear Young, You are still the boy I grew to love and cherish forty-four years ago. The lyrics you sent, to “The Things You Are To Me” brought back many fond memories of our time together. You, young man, do have a way with words. In more ways than one, you always touched the core of my heart with your innocence and childlike approach to life. Walter is a lucky man to have you in his life. I wish I were in his shoes, you little ‘faerie’ boy, stirring up an emotional storm within me which I had kept hidden for so long. Now that our parents are deceased, we can be free from the emotional baggage imposed upon us. You had mentioned briefly that you are writing your memoirs. I hope you are not revealing anything that we pledged to never reveal. My advice to you is to stay clear of those subjects. It is not advisable to tamper with the school or the Society, especially when you swore an oath, a gentlemanly honor of confidentiality to never reveal any of our membership secrets. If the word gets out, the paparazzi will have a field day digging for whatever dirt they can find. I hate to see you being sued by any parties involved. I’m speaking to you as a trusted friend, confidant, and ex- lover. Tread with caution, Young! You are old enough to decide for yourself. I’m sure you don’t need your ex-Valet to tell you what to do. Please send my regards to Walter and maybe we’ll have a chance to meet one day, soon. Let’s continue our regular correspondence. My love always! Andy.

These independent systems of the subconscious may be regarded as complexes in the classic sense. They are islands of unresolved conflict that have been pushed away instead of integrated. Psychotherapy would be the treatment of choice for these complexes, whereby the therapist would help the patient reintegrate all of the emotional baggage he or she has pushed out of focus and awareness. Since mind and brain are two ways of expressing the same underlying reality, even these functional complexes reflect changes in the neural networks of the brain.

...it takes a special person to be a great foster parent, someone who realizes that the child he or she is receiving isn't perfect and probably is carrying a lot of heavy emotional baggage and bad habits. But that understanding and acceptance are essential if foster parents truly hope to bring any sense of normalcy to the child living with them in their home. The rest is all uphill from there.

They teach us that we must shed our false self and allow our true self to emerge. This journey toward holiness takes us deep into our inner desert. The desert is too hot a place in which to carry our emotional and spiritual excess baggage, so we begin to let go rather than continue carrying the burden. Our desert begins to remove the excess we did not know was there.

I had control issues, enough emotional baggage to excite a team of psychiatrists, and—thanks to my demon half—a penchant for snap decisions driven by instinct. And that was when my demon was subdued. When she came to the party, I was as stable as a nuclear reactor on meltdown.

Nobody can succeed in these jobs without some ice chips in her veins. Your emotional lovelies weigh on you. Be free of them and any other baggage and you’ll find happiness.” I

Combined, the capacity for intention, discernment, and self-control—or again, heart, mind, and will—might be called virtue, character, maturity, emotional intelligence, sophia, or wisdom. Unfortunately, these terms are all loaded. They're fraught with religious, political, and philosophical dogma that fails to distinguish between pure expedience and moral righteousness. [...] I need vocabulary without baggage.

Emotional baggage doesn’t fit in the overhead compartment. You have to pay extra to check it.

Emotional baggage doesn’t fit in the overhead compartment. You have to pay extra to check it.” Goblin wisdom.

When you’re busy, you lack the time to fondle your emotional baggage. And if that sounds too reductive, remember we crawled from the swamp. Simple isn’t such a terrible thing to be in this respect.

Life is meant to be easy. Your life is meant to be of love and laughter, abundance and fulfilment. What keeps you from these things is your old emotional baggage, your belief about reality, and your fear that you are not worthy. Every time you find yourself in a struggle you are in a place of fear. Each time you refuse to deal with an emotional issue in the now moment you are adding to your emotional baggage. If you will not examine your belief structures and fears and deal with the emotions, you limit yourself to a most confining prison. Each NOW is another opportunity for you to choose how it may be for you.

You are not fat anymore, by the way.” “But I am still a hurt, sexually abused little girl inside of my head. I have to let go of that before I can help other women overcome the worst experiences of their entire lives. The obesity is just the fallout. Everything that caused it is the problem. I have to let go of all that emotional baggage before I can get married and have a healthy sex life with my husband, one blessed by God’s love.

Personal growth is all about reflecting and noticing the thoughts that simply don’t serve my family or me. Past grudges, regrets, anger, resentment, fears, and other emotional baggage only hinder the happiness in my spirit and our home. In essence, it is a spring-cleaning of unhealthy attachments.

Gravity can also shape our emotional selves. Emotional baggage, for instance, is a form of gravity; we acquire more of it as we get older, and it weighs us down. The more emotional gravity we’re fighting, the more force we require to move forward. And force moving against gravity creates a lot of friction. On

It’s all right,” Kat said softly, sitting beside him. “I wasn’t exactly trying to get away. I should have, though—I don’t want to lead you on.” He gave her a look from the corner of his eye. “Meaning you still have no interest in us.” “I think I could if I let myself—I could have feelings for you, anyway,” Kat said honestly. “I mean, you’re sweet and kind and caring and gorgeous—what more could a girl want?” “But?” Lock raised one dark blond eyebrow at her. “But…” she said reluctantly. “You come with an awful lot of baggage. You know what I mean.” “Yes.” He nodded heavily. “Yes, I do. But my lady, if you could just give Deep a chance…” Kat was already shaking her head. “I’m afraid not, Lock, it would never work. Deep and I—we’re like oil and water—we don’t mix. We can’t even have a single conversation without it turning into a shouting match.” Lock’s broad shoulders slumped. “I know he’s difficult to get along with. But he truly does care for you.” “Then why don’t I feel it?” Kat asked. “I get all these strong emotions from you two but what I mostly feel from him is lust and annoyance. He wants me but mostly I irritate him.” “You’re only feeling what he lets himself feel,” Lock protested. “But under all that, he cares. I know he does.” “Maybe you just want him to,” Kat said gently. “Because you two come as a package deal and I can’t take one without the other. Look, I can tell how hard it is for you and I’m sorry—really I am. But aside from the whole feeling both of your emotions thing and the, uh, way you perform bonding sex which is scary to say the least…” she shivered and wrapped her arms around herself. “Aside from that, the fact is, I just can’t let myself get involved with two guys when one of them can’t stand me.

Why would you want to load down a business relationship with a lot of emotional baggage, including guilt, which can be the by-product of “friendship”? It doesn’t work. It doesn’t pay.

If you had caught me in a quiet moment, when [...] stimuli weren’t bombarding me, [and asked me how I was feeling] I would have responded [...]: Something’s not right. I feel unsettled. Everything feels like the same old, same old. Something is missing. [...] I saw that all of my perceived happiness was really just a reaction to stimuli in the external world that made me feel certain ways. I then understood that I was totally addicted to my environment, and I was dependent on external cues to reinforce my emotional addiction. What a moment for me. I had heard a million times that happiness comes from within, but it never hit me like this before [...] Staying busy keeps unwanted emotions at bay. [...] But when we never overcome our limitations and continue carrying the baggage from our past, it will always catch up with us. [...] [People may try to make all sorts of external environmental changes in] futile efforts to do or try something new so that they can feel better or different. But emotionally, when the novelty wears off, they are still stuck with the same identity. [...] When we keep that diversion up, guess what eventually happens? We grow more dependent on something outside of us to change us internally. [...] Nothing outside of us can ever make us happy. [...] Nothing in our environment is going to “fix” the way we feel. [...] Let go of the façade, the games, and the illusions. [...] Happiness comes from within. [...] Once you change your internal state, you don’t need the external world to provide you with a reason to feel joy, gratitude, appreciation, or any other elevated emotion.

The birds inspired me." “They may be born with wings, but they too fall before learning to fly. While they begin life amongst other birds, growing up, they must fend for themselves. Some may express displeasure, others would show admiration, but they cannot allow either of the emotions to get to them. Riding on winds and touring the sky, they do not worry about the ones who do not keep up with their pace, because if they halt to look back at the companions they lost, they will never reach the heights they were destined to. Birds do not carry excess baggage; the weight will hinder their flight. Free-spirited, they explore the skies with faith, trusting Allah to take care of them. Everything else is transient. Ibn al-Qayyim used their example and said, the heart, in its journey to Allah, The Exalted, is like that of a bird: love is its head, fear and hope are its two wings.

Dating with an eye toward marriage changes not just when you date and who you date but also how you date. Since the end goal is marriage, you want to do things in dating that will set you up for success in your future marriage—whether that’s with the person you’re dating currently or with someone else in the future if it doesn’t work out with this person. That means having healthy boundaries in dating and not crossing inappropriate lines physically or emotionally. You want to treat them well even if you break up with them, and thereby avoid having any angry exes show up at your wedding. It also means using your single time wisely. If you are not ready to date, or are not currently dating for whatever reason, that doesn’t mean you’re stuck waiting passively. You can do yourself and your future spouse a big favor by working to unpack some of your baggage so you won’t have to carry it with you into marriage. As I’ve often said, there are no married people problems—just single people problems carried into marriage.

So, I did what any seventeen-year-old with a shed load of emotional baggage did. I pulled on my favourite outfit, smudged some gloss over my lips, and headed to another party.

Can I carry Something? Caroline offered. Just your emotional baggage, Virginia said, picking up an appetizer tray.

Expressed emotion is positive and fresh. Internalized emotion is stagnated emotion, often creating bad feelings, becoming "moldy or stale baggage.

The most important thing is that you're marrying the man you love. And a man who's single and solvent and without any emotional baggage.

They understand that I come with baggage and embrace it.

I won’t waste one more moment on any of you I’ve cleared out the emotional baggage, there’s the door And now the world even knows it too You can’t hurt me anymore!

The warrior who has released the old dream of his domestication—along with the rules and behaviors dictated by that programming—learns to listen to the instructions of his feelings. He is no longer a puppet of his emotional reactions. His recapitulation has revealed and rejected the lies from the past, and replaced them with the truth of self-acceptance and universal perfection. Without his emotional baggage, he is able to listen to the quieter truth that arises in him in every moment.

When we're in an emotional pain, or any physical strain, we must consider ourselves as a tainted cabbage. Our aim should be to remove our felt baggage. Usually, when a cabbage is tainted, only a small section is affected. But we often err, and throw the whole cabbage in the air.

If we had a visual of the baggage we’re carrying around, it would either make us laugh, cry, or both! Picture every negative experience, emotion, or belief you have about past relationships. If each of them were a bag you had to carry around with you everywhere you go, would you get very far? It’s really quite simple. You can either choose to heal, let go, and return these bags to where they came from, or you can feel burdened by them for the rest of your life. How healthy can you be in your current relationship—or how successfully can you find the right one—if you’re carrying all this stuff around?

I’m serious. I pegged Knox and his baggage within thirty seconds of meeting him. But you carry yours closer. Like it’s in an emotional fanny pack.

The intent of Life Mapping is to get you to pull every bad memory or experience out of you and lay it on the table.

We all find success and healing in an inconsistent manner. It’s the start to becoming consistent. Don’t be hard on yourself but be encouraging and tough.

Always think first, respond second, and react never. Reacting means you didn’t think first, that someone can pick your insecurities like a guitar and have you dance to their music anytime they want. To be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul, you must practice thoroughly thinking matters through.

Fear can be the by-product of a litany of different experiences

Of uncharted roads, unimagined experiences, and strangers less strange than the familiar. To travel anywhere without reservations; of bookings, or otherwise. To happily hop on to the next vehicle that comes along on a deserted road. To sleep in any corner of the world that offers me my six feet of space. To feel at home at every place, even other than home. Travels that remind you that if life is indeed a journey, it is also best enjoyed if one travels light. Not lugging around unnecessary baggage; of emotions and possessions. Travels that teach you that when in pain, the only place to run to for a solution is within you. And not to magical mountains or ‘mystical savannahs’; if you know what I mean. For, none exist.

Travels that remind you that if life is indeed a journey, it is also best enjoyed if one travels light. Not lugging around unnecessary baggage; of emotions and possessions. Travels that teach you that when in pain, the only place to run to for a solution is within you. And not to magical mountains or ‘mystical savannahs’; if you know what I mean. For, none exist.

For me, it's really easy to be kind to others when I remember that none of us came into this world with a manual about how to get it all right. We are ultimately a product of our biology and environment. Consequently, I choose to be compassionate with others when I consider how much painful emotional baggage we are biologically programmed to carry around. I recognize that mistakes will be made, but this does not mean that I need to either victimize myself or take your actions and mistakes personally. Your stuff is your stuff, and my stuff is my stuff

And in the silence, I began to think: that's what frustrates me about a particular kind of migrant, the ones who drop their cultural baggage entirely in order to assimilate successfully into their new surroundings (as opposed to the other extreme, who cling desperately to memories of the homeland, and can't wait for the day they can retire and return to the place they have just left). For the problem with the Forgetters is that the need to wipe the slate clean in their adoptive country doesn't just begin and end with their arrival in their new land; it continues thereafter, repeating itself until it finds a convenient historical ground zero that is emotionally and intellectually untroubled, so that a new narrative about themselves is formed, a glowingly positive trajectory that strives for a clean story arc, complete with neatly packaged doses of pain - ultimately overcome, of course - that punctuate the rise to comfort and success and happiness.

Because nothing shouts I’m an adult with serious emotional baggage better than Hello motherfucking Kitty.

Constantly carrying around the emotional baggage of an unhappy upbringing, Simon had hoped that bombarding his brain with a plethora of foreign chemicals would somehow plaster over the cracks in his sanity. Yet the sad reality was, after countless come-downs and episodes of paranoia, drugs changed nothing. No drug had ever contained opium for the soul.

This is emotional dumping, when your conversation partner repeatedly dumps all of their emotional baggage in your lap, portrays themselves as the victim, takes no advice or follow-up action,

This final point may ironically be the real key to unlocking other people—making sure we understand ourselves at a bare minimum before we turn our analytical gaze outward. If you’re unaware of how you may be projecting your own needs, fears, assumptions, and biases onto others, your observations and conclusions about others will not amount to much. In fact, you may have simply discovered a roundabout way of learning about yourself and the cognitive and emotional baggage you’re bringing to the table.

The more attachments we accumulate, the more we need this inner cleansing. If we have mental baggage, we need to unlearn; if we have emotional dependencies, we need to let them go; if we have possessions that clutter up our lives, we need to give them away.

Excess baggage is a symptom of something we are missing on the inside, a fear that we won’t be accepted for what we are, we see ourselves as not enough. We bring too much of our past experience, the clutter of our emotions.

To this day, I remain awestruck by the fact that human beings are capable of this type of metamorphosis. We don’t have to stay stuck displaying the same personality traits over the course of our lifetime but are free to transform into higher expressions of ourselves. Today I can honestly say that I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that human beings are capable of making radical and lasting change. After a decade of coaching individuals and leading groups, I have discovered that if I don’t buy into people’s perceptions of who they are and what they are capable of, I can bypass their public personas and see who they are in their highest expression. With a little effort, I can see their magnificence and their potential no matter what they look like or what condition their emotional, spiritual, or financial world is in. I can see through their acts, their personas, their fears and insecurities. I can see who they are apart from the baggage they carry around. The undeniable fact is that underneath all of our public personas, we already are that which we desire to be. Our only job is to see past our own limitations so that we can return to that which we already are.

That I wrote six books about my past is the red herring; nothing I have written has in any way altered the past or healed me clean, so no scar remains. Perhaps the process of writing—being fully in the moment, while I write letter by letter—has soothed me because it’s kept me busy. When you’re busy, you lack the time to fondle your emotional baggage. And if that sounds too reductive, remember we crawled from the swamp. Simple isn’t such a terrible thing to be in this respect.

When you’re in your twenties and you haven’t fully realized what you look for in a partner, the single market has about everything you can imagine and more. And you’re like a blank canvas—everyone’s like a blank canvas—as you discover how to paint a relationship together. Later in life, when you’ve experienced love and heartbreak and you find yourself single again and returning to the spouseless market, you kind of figure out that what’s left for you…is not a blank canvas for you to write your story on anymore. Every bachelor comes with a previous story, with drama and emotional baggage from their past relationships. And you—you—have to deal with it all, measure the puzzle pieces and see if somehow they might fit within the gaps and cracks left by your own experiences.

So many people I have met over the years walk around carrying a heap of emotional hang-ups that weigh them down. Maybe it’s the burden of parental expectations that makes them pick a job based on what they felt they ‘should’ do rather than would ‘love’ to do. Or maybe it is a deep-rooted fear about the future, or an anxiety about what people might think of them if they choose a more unusual or less ‘celebrated’ or money-generating profession. Whatever the ‘baggage’ is, those people lug this unnecessary burden around, determined subconsciously to live out their lives in such a way as to endorse what some key influencers have told them about themselves over the years. Even if those ‘home truths’ aren’t true! So many people have been told too many negative things from a very young age, and these shape us. ‘You’re no good, you’re stupid, you’re a failure, a disgrace…’ the list goes on. But they are not true. I am here to say that this burden doesn’t have to forge your reality. Yes, maybe you failed at something. So what? Who hasn’t? That doesn’t make you a failure. ‘You’re stupid.’ No, you are not. You just failed an exam because you probably didn’t work hard enough! So, can you see some common solutions? For the failures - keep trying. For the exams - work harder. Both are qualities you can influence. That’s the good news. And as for the names you were called - believe me, they aren’t you, and you don’t have to wear those labels any longer. Start afresh. Drop them. Pack light.

15. Shedding The Heavy Unnecessary So, before we go too much further, now is a good chance to acknowledge that maybe, just maybe, we are all a little guilty of sometimes living someone else’s aspirations for us instead of our own. And this is a great time to say ‘No more!’ to living out of fear and other people’s expectations. It is never an easy time to face some of those old negative feelings, but it is always a good time to change the way we pack and what we choose to carry further down the road of our lives and adventures. Ultimately, the more ‘bad’ equipment we carry, the slower we go and the less far we travel. Each of us gets to choose. But when we shed the bad and travel lighter, a few things happen. First up, I bet that you will laugh more, you will worry less and you are much more likely to achieve your dream. Travelling light also keeps us free to adapt our adventures or careers. Free to listen to the calling. How often do great opportunities come to people, but they are too ‘busy’ or maybe too cynical to even notice them, let alone walk through an exciting new doorway. Winston Churchill (him again!) once said words to the effect that everyone gets the chance to make their fortune once, but not everybody takes it. If you’re weighed down, head down and bunged up with emotional junk, you might miss that chance. So look wisely at the ‘baggage’ you carry and your attitudes to the world. They will define you. Do they enhance your life and increase your chances of reaching your dream, or do they hold you back?

The past gets carried with us. It's always there.

I’m fine,” she said, nodding. I’d heard the “I’m fine” answer before. It usually came right before I broke it off with whatever female I’d been dating. The “I’m fine” ushered in a whole new territory of relationship baggage, where you then had to set off on a truth-seeking mission, like some emotional scavenger hunt.

I was just a black girl, a little long in the tooth, but still in my mind just a black girl writing. Black girls do not cause problems for powerful white women or august professional publications or public discourse. 3 Black girls have not, for most of my understanding of our history in this nation, had the power to cause those kinds of problems. Black girls and black women are problems. That is not the same thing as causing problems. We are social issues to be solved, economic problems to be balanced, and emotional baggage to be overcome.

Baggage evolves from painful, harmful or negative experiences and from interactions that caused a significant emotional reaction within you. These feelings continue to shape who you are, how you think, the choices you make, and the actions you take now. Baggage will impair your ability to function, adapt and evolve

There were things I liked, things that had caught my attention over the years, but for the most part, I was empty. Over the past couple of years, I'd been slowly unpacking all the emotional baggage from the past, all the trauma and fear, but that mess had done more than just keep me silent, existing in the background. It had held me back from–from living. Wasn't that what being passionate really was? Living? Except that fear was still there and because of it, I was this blank thing. Oddly, a pressure lifted from my shoulders. I didn't feel bad about this as I rose. I was basically a blank canvas and that wasn't a bad thing, I decided in that moment, because that meant I...I could be whatever. I could become anything. I just had to do it.

What provokes readers to experience their own profound sense of self? How do readers feel their oats, pick up their own baggage, smile at their own ironies, snap out of their worries, and feel that things today actually are okay? In life, things like that can happen when we bounce off of others or pick up the moods of others. We lock horns, back away from bias, scream at rock concerts, cheer at football games, nod in agreement, join the mob and pick up stones to throw, or raise our palms to heaven and murmur an amen. The effect is similar in fiction. In reading fiction we react to what others are feeling strongly, in this case the characters. Strong feelings are an invitation. Or a challenge. Strong feelings press us to judge what characters feel. We sympathize with them, or not. We engage on our own level.

The attitude of neutrality allows grandparents to listen to the teenager without the emotional baggage their parents carry. And if we listen carefully, we may be able to glimpse what the teenager is going through.

Carrying around unhealed wounds from your past can have a similar effect. This baggage, although invisible, can bring about a spiritual and an emotional fatigue, and will ultimately use your yesterday to rob your today.

Who decided to call it "Emotional Baggage" and not "Griefcase"?

Grief is a conduit -- for love, for compassion, for healing, and for grace.

Love transcends blood ties, it pays no heed to time or space, much less mere geography.

I'll Be There For You These words are etched on our hearts. but they're so much more than just words, they're a complete emotion. But it's all just an illusion, a utopia, for which we long. we trade in drinking coffee on a couch, with drinking at a bar. we utter more words to Alexa and Siri, than to people face to face. we can never have six people in one room without anyone looking at their phones. we trade in memories with pictures. we actively look for reasons to not be around people. a Chandler is considered too mean and sarcastic, Ross has too much baggage, who has the energy to deal with that. Phoebe is too quirky to handle. Rachel, that spoilt and entitled bitch. no way. Joey is the fuck boy that will cause you nothing but pain, and Monica with her OCD, that's way too high maintenance. no, we don't say these things when we watch the show, we say these about people around us who bear similar characteristics. we adore these characters, we envy their friendship, their bond, their love. we long for nothing else, yet when confronted with them in real life, we belittle, avoid, cut-off, ignore. we don't want to disturb the utopia, are terrified of bursting the bubble, because if we start recognizing the flaws in our fantasies, we'll be forced to recognize our own. we love to live an à la carte life, wherein we pick and choose the qualities and personalities of a person that we wish to see, and the ones that may simply be brushed away. Generation after generation, will watch that show and call it their utopia, and each will give up hope of ever attaining that, alas! It was a different time! what we long for doesn't require a time machine to achieve, it doesn't need for mobile phones to not exist, or for less bars to exist, or to live away from your parents. it's only as complicated as we try to make it, when it can be as simple as, "I'll be there for you, 'cause you're there for me too

I'll Be There For You" These words are etched on our hearts. but they're so much more than just words, they're a complete emotion. But it's all just an illusion, a utopia, for which we long. we trade in drinking coffee on a couch, with drinking at a bar. we utter more words to Alexa and Siri, than to people face to face. we can never have six people in one room without anyone looking at their phones. we trade in memories with pictures. we actively look for reasons to not be around people. a Chandler is considered too mean and sarcastic, Ross has too much baggage, who has the energy to deal with that. Phoebe is too quirky to handle. Rachel, that spoilt and entitled bitch. no way. Joey is the fuck boy that will cause you nothing but pain, and Monica with her OCD, that's way too high maintenance. no, we don't say these things when we watch the show, we say these about people around us who bear similar characteristics. we adore these characters, we envy their friendship, their bond, their love. we long for nothing else, yet when confronted with them in real life, we belittle, avoid, cut-off, ignore. we don't want to disturb the utopia, are terrified of bursting the bubble, because if we start recognizing the flaws in our fantasies, we'll be forced to recognize our own. we love to live an à la carte life, wherein we pick and choose the qualities and personalities of a person that we wish to see, and the ones that may simply be brushed away. Generation after generation, will watch that show and call it their utopia, and each will give up hope of ever attaining that, alas! It was a different time! what we long for doesn't require a time machine to achieve, it doesn't need for mobile phones to not exist, or for less bars to exist, or to live away from your parents. it's only as complicated as we try to make it, when it can be as simple as, "I'll be there for you, 'cause you're there for me too

I'll Be There For You These words are etched on our hearts. but they're so much more than just words, they're a complete emotion. But it's all just an illusion, a utopia, for which we long. we trade in drinking coffee on a couch, with drinking at a bar. we utter more words to Alexa and Siri, than to people face to face. we can never have six people in one room without anyone looking at their phones. we trade in memories with pictures. we actively look for reasons to not be around people. a Chandler is considered too mean and sarcastic, Ross has too much baggage, who has the energy to deal with that. Phoebe is too quirky to handle. Rachel, that spoilt and entitled bitch. no way. Joey is the fuck boy that will cause you nothing but pain, and Monica with her OCD, that's way too high maintenance. no, we don't say these things when we watch the show, we say these about people around us who bear similar characteristics. we adore these characters, we envy their friendship, their bond, their love. we long for nothing else, yet when confronted with them in real life, we belittle, avoid, cut-off, ignore. we don't want to disturb the utopia, are terrified of bursting the bubble, because if we start recognizing the flaws in our fantasies, we'll be forced to recognize our own. we love to live an à la carte life, wherein we pick and choose the qualities and personalities of a person that we wish to see, and the ones that may simply be brushed away. Generation after generation, will watch that show and call it their utopia, and each will give up hope of ever attaining that, alas! It was a different time! what we long for doesn't require a time machine to achieve, it doesn't need for mobile phones to not exist, or for less bars to exist, or to live away from your parents. it's only as complicated as we try to make it, when it can be as simple as, I'll be there for you, 'cause you're there for me too

Let go of the past. Let go of the emotional baggage that holds you back. Wear a black obsidian gemstone if you have to.

Black girls have not, for most of my understanding of our history in this nation, had the power to cause those kinds of problems. Black girls and black women are problems. That is not the same thing as causing problems. We are social issues to be solved, economic problems to be balanced, and emotional baggage to be overcome.

Do I feel pain? Yes, but I decide what to do with it rather than let it dictate my life. It’s a choice you have to make. It’s impossible to serve God’s purpose if you’re feeling sorry for yourself or you’re stuck in the past. Hurt feelings filled with emotional baggage can be a deep, dark, bottomless pit if you indulge them.

To continue the debate, Egan has responded directly to interview questions about his approach to characterization: There's a preconception in some circles that the characters in realistic fiction ought to have a certain quota of relationship problems, family issues and emotional baggage of various kinds—and some people seem literally unable to believe that a real human being can be more passionate about scientific ideas than anything else, even though the history of science is littered with people for whom that was true. I write about characters for whom the events of whatever story I'm telling are among the most important things in their lives, and there's not much point writing about science through the eyes of someone who'd rather be down the pub. (“Interview: Virtual Worlds”)

Most of us travel through life with heavy, bulky emotional baggage. To our great relief, with meditative practices and their healing modalities, we can shrink this baggage to carry-on size.

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No offense, but I don’t really care about your life. I don’t want to know about your past. You’re…too much to handle. You’re too loud, too emotional, too high maintenance. You have all this baggage, and I’m not going to stick around long enough for you to saddle me with it. If you think any guy would be willing to put up with you, you’re crazier than I thought.

Language: Language is more than our means of communication; it is the means by which we explain what we experience and the vehicle for our culture. To know another man's language is to know something of his soul. Language: "The man who speaks in a foreign tongue, not his own, is to a certain extent wearing a disguise. If one wants to discover his ideas de derrière la tête encourage him to use his own language." — Ernest Satow Language and culture in diplomacy: Unlike academics and intelligence analysts, diplomats must apply their knowledge of foreign cultures and languages in their daily work. Diplomatic expertise with regard to a foreign culture and language is not an end in itself; it is a means to an end. The test of this expertise is the diplomat's capacity to understand the mental baggage and mindsets of foreign leaders sufficiently well to be able to anticipate how they will perceive certain circumstances and what they will do in response to specific statements or events. It is, moreover, the responsibility of the diplomat to advise his government on how to shape circmustances, statements, and events to produce the desired response from foreign leaders, and to take a hand in shaping these himself. Language defines reality: "Each and every tongue is a distinct window into the world. Looking through it, the native speaker enters an emotional and spiritual space, a framework of memory, a promontory on tomorrow, which no other window in the great house of Babel quite matches. Thus every language mirrors and generates a possible world, an alternate reality." — George Steiner Languages for diplomats: In every age and region there is a language that is the most common means of communication between educated men. A diplomat must speak that language; he should also speak the language of the great powers whose interests bear most heavily on the state he is representing.

Emotional wounds created the most baggage that eventually became unbearable to carry. My mother was an alcoholic for a reason. Not that I was brimming with sympathy for that toxic hag — particularly after her latest media stunt — but I knew that people didn’t spring from the dirt with issues. As impossible as it seemed, Carla West had been born with a clean slate, innocent and unsullied by life. I loved my Gran but I could tell she probably wasn’t always the best to have around. She was different by the time I came around but there’s no telling what kind of scars she left behind on her only daughter.

This emotional baggage needed to be unpacked before I left Mansfield in my rear-view, and I was on my way to dump it at the feet of the one who’d overpacked the bag in the first place.

I was able to persuade each new Strattonite to leave the insults of the past behind and check their emotional baggage at the door;

Look, everyone comes here with baggage, all right? Even Daisy, who acts like she's thrilled to be here, is carrying around a lifetime of baggage and emotional distress. It doesn't all have to be unloaded. If you feel better holding onto it, do that until you're ready. Lord knows I understand. But I do want to say a few things before you beat yourself up for having the world's tightest vagina.