Zodiac Funny Quotes

Like your zodiac sign? Percy asked. 'I'm a Leo. 'No, stupid,' Leo said. I'm a Leo. You're a Percy.

Like your zodiac sign?' Percy asked. 'I'm a Leo.' 'No, stupid,' Leo said. 'I'm a Leo. You're a Percy.

I got that he hadn’t found the whole Pegasus thing funny, but the issue I had with that was that he was wrong. That shit was funny. Stupid funny. And he needed to stop pouting like a little bitch about it and learn to laugh at himself from time to time.

Fate is a funny friend and a heartless enemy.

You’re not the funny one. Just try and stick in your snarky, bitchy lane, yeah? It suits you better.” I opened my mouth to protest that, but Darius turned and punched him in the arm before I could. “Don’t tell her she can’t be funny, dickhead,” he warned like my own personal dark knight. “Well tell me this, Darius,” Seth said seriously, looking him square in the eye. “Did. You. Laugh?

Unlike other features on OkCupid, there is no visual component to match percentage. The number between two people only reflects what you might call their inner selves—everything about what they believe, need, and want, even what they think is funny, but nothing about what they look like. Judging by just this compatibility measure, the four largest racial groups on OkCupid—Asian, black, Latino, and white—all get along about the same.1 In fact, race has less effect on match percentage than religion, politics, or education. Among the details that users believe are important, the closest comparison to race is Zodiac sign, which has no effect at all. To a computer not acculturated to the categories, “Asian” and “black” and “white” could just as easily be “Aries” and “Virgo” and “Capricorn.” But this racial neutrality is only in theory; things change once the users’ own opinions, and not just the color-blind workings of an algorithm, come into play.

Meanwhile, the king of Athens was invited to the mess hall for a "get to know you" meeting. "Please take a seat," Jason offered. Kekrops wrinkled his nose. "Snake people do not sit." "Please remain standing," Leo said. He cut the cake and stuffed a piece in his mouth before Piper could warn him it might be poisoned, or inedible for mortals, or just plain bad. "Dang!" He grinned. "Snake people know how to make Bundt cake. Kind of orangey, with a hint of honey. Needs a glass of milk." "Snake people do not drink milk," Kekrops said. "We are lactose intolerant reptiles. "Me too!" Frank said. "I mean . .. lactose intolerant. Not a reptile. Though I can be a reptile sometimes-" "Anyway," Hazel interrupted, "King Kekrops, what brings you here? How did you know we'd arrived?" "I know everything that happens in Athens," Kekrops said. "I was the city's founder, its first king, born of the earth. I am the one who judged the dispute between Athena and Poseidon, and chose Athena to be the patron of the city." "No hard feelings, though," Percy muttered. Annabeth elbowed him. "I’ve heard of you, Kekrops. You were the first to offer sacrifices to Athena. You built her first shrine on the Acropolis. "Correct." Kekrops sounded bitter, like he regretted his decision. "My people were the original Athenians- the gemini." "Like your zodiac sign?" Percy asked. "I'm a Leo." "No, stupid," Leo said. "I'm a Leo. You're a Percy.

Right team.” I clapped my hands to get their attention. “Go out there and destroy Starlight Academy like you were made to do. You were trained by the best, so be the best.” I gazed across the lot of them as they lined up. The Heirs pulled ranks, clapping each other on the shoulders but some of them still looked miserable. A familiar chant carried from the crowd back in the stadium and hope burned through my chest. Perfect timing! “You can't scare the Heirs, the Heirs don't care. You can't scare the Heirs, the Heirs don't care!” The rest of the team took up the chant, grouping together and locking their arms over their shoulders in a circle, though I noticed Ashanti Larue kept her distance from Seth. The Heirs soon joined in, jumping up and down and pumping their fists. I folded my arms, grinning as I watched. The funny thing was, that chant was the biggest lie I'd ever heard. Because I’d never, in all the years I'd known them, seen the Celestial Heirs look so rattled. (OrionPOV)

Something funny?” I asked as I shovelled a forkful of pancake into my mouth. “You’re just so fucking cute sometimes, Leo.

Oh no?" he sneered, pulling a packet of cigarettes from his pocket and lighting one up. "Knowing what you're like, the slightest sign of a discarded cigarette butt and you would've been crawling around on your hands and knees trying to figure out how tall the smoker was, how old he was, what zodiac sign he was, whether he'd taken a crap that morning, and Christ knows what else.

Funny though. If he finds a way to make a morally just cause heard, he becomes a saint...His worst enemy is himself. Which is what you have to deal with if you want to be with him. He's anxious like the show-off drunk at a karaoke bar when the words don't come up on the screen. Make sure you give him the script so he has something to read from.

The first thing you have to remember is that we count the days a bit differently. Having 39.6 more minutes each day, and 669 days—or sols, as we call ’em—in a sidereal period, meant that aresians threw out both Greenwich Mean Time and the Gregorian calendar in a.d. 2032, long before the Pax Astra took control of the near-space colonies, way before Mars declared its independence. The Zubrin calendar has twelve months, ranging from 48 to 66 sols in length, each named after a Zodiac constellation; it retroactively began on January 1, 1961, which became Gemini 1, m.y. 1 by local reckoning. The conversion factors from Gregorian to Zubrin calendars are fairly complex, so don’t ask for an explanation here; best to say that one of the first things newcomers from Earth have to realize is that April Fool pranks are even less funny at Arsia Station than they were back in Indiana.

Venus is a dirty, conniving, skank bitch who invented unrequited love and thinks it’s funny to fuck with Fae emotions whenever she likes.

He caught my eye and for a moment I felt like he really understood something about me. His gaze trailed to his father then back to me before he spoke again. “It’s funny, you spent every Christmas wishing you could spend it with a family who wanted you there and I spent every Christmas looking forward to these formal meals so that I didn’t have to spend too much of it in the company of mine.” His hand shifted on the table and his little finger grazed mine. My stomach fluttered at the unexpected contact and I bit my lip as I found myself hooked in his gaze with his dark eyes boring into my soul as if he could really see me.

Believing in race can be compared to believing in astrology. People who have faith in astrology find constant confirmation that horoscope predictions are reliable and that astrological signs determine personality types. For the faithful, the twelve divisions of the zodiac are as accurate as Blumenbach’s five divisions of human beings. The funny thing is, biostatisticians can find significant medical differences according to astrological signs. In the 1990s, a major randomized clinical trial compared the effectiveness of an intravenous drug, an oral aspirin, and a placebo to treat 17,000 patients who were hospitalized with signs of a heart attack. The study found a huge overall statistical benefit for patients who got the aspirin over the placebo. To test the strength of the outcome, the researchers divided the patients into twelve subgroups by their astrological signs. They found that the zodiac made a difference: their statistical analysis showed that patients born under Gemini or Libra suffered an adverse effect from aspirin.72 Unsurprisingly, physicians laughed off this finding because it was more scientifically plausible to interpret the results as an insignificant coincidence. But an astrology enthusiast would take it as proof that zodiac signs determine people’s health and drug response.