Waterproof Mascara Quotes

it kept him from seeing the tears that were forming at the corners of my eyes, threatening to test the waterproofness of Macey’s new mascara,

A previous sub once blamed me because she had to throw out her mascara and buy a waterproof one. Tears are granted. Tears for all reasons.

How hard would it be to repurpose the old smoking lounges and designate a space where people can go to break down for whatever reason? A crying lounge could be stocked with cold beverages, soft chairs, windows to stare out of, large sunglasses in a range of sizes, fresh waterproof mascara, and friendly, quiet dogs of varying fluffiness. It could be centrally located but closed off, separate from the rest of the airport, just like time and space in the air are separate from time and space on the ground. Wouldn’t it be lovely to have a place where we could privately fall to pieces and then get ourselves together? Instead, we have to do it out in the open.

The Men’s Wearhouse where the boys were measured for their suits was holy; the T.J. Maxx where the girls texted each other pictures from their respective dressing rooms was holy; the Shoe Carnival where they staggered up and down the aisles almost laughing; the Michael’s where they chose posterboards for collages; the florist where they pointed at baby’s breath; the bakery where they deliberated over tea cookies; the Clinique counter where they bought waterproof mascara; the Cheesecake Factory where they ate bang-bang shrimp after it all and were very very kind to each other was holy, and the light fixtures she always made fun of seemed to bloom the whole time on their stems.

One sister. Younger, of course. I terrorized her for most of our childhood. On the other hand, every time I fell asleep in the family room, she put makeup on my face and took pictures. So I guess it evens itself out. Plus, I'm the only man you'll ever meet who understands just how hard it is to remove waterproof mascara. And I guess I'll never run for political office. The photos alone would ruin me.

I couldn’t avoid my reflection in the large mirrored wall that sat over the vanity area... I had grey smudges of mascara streaked down my face. I guess that’s what you get for buying the cheap makeup. Next breakdown I’d be sure to wear waterproof.

Promise, give it to the lord, let him break you, and he will give you your hearts desire.

In times of crisis, keep your lipstick red and your mascara waterproof.