The Teacher Freida Mcfadden Quotes

You know things are seriously bad when even ice cream doesn’t help.

Digging a grave is hard work.

You like spending time with your books more than you like spending time with me. I don’t think it was true, but if it was, could anyone blame her?

But we’re never going to be able to be friends again. Things will never be the way they used to be between the two of us. Not since Hudson helped me kill my father.

If you’ve never been buried alive, I don’t recommend it.

I recite to myself the poem he once wrote for me many years ago, back when I was fifteen years old and he was my English teacher

Sometimes I try to kid myself that I’m an adult now, but how can I be an adult when I still feel fifteen half the time?

She’s just lucky that Nate sees something in her, because God knows I don’t.

Every time I think I’ve experienced the worst day yet, there is a new winner.

I am so lucky. I have a beautiful house, a fulfilling career, and a husband who is kind and mild mannered and incredibly handsome. And as Nate pulls the car onto the road and starts driving in the direction of the school, all I can think to myself is that I hope a truck blows through a stop sign, plows into the Honda, and kills us both instantly.

If I were a cat, I would have peed on him, but since I’m a human, I plant a kiss on his lips that is markedly steamier than our usual three kisses per day.

We never left it in the trunk after all.

I have eaten lunch alone every day

I imagine dying is like standing on the precipice of that abyss, knowing that you will fall in at any second.

Not since Hudson helped me kill my father.

He just called me his soulmate. It’s wild, because I feel the exact same way, but I would have thought I was imagining it if he hadn’t said it. “You can’t help who you form a connection with. Right?

And as Nate pulls the car onto the road and starts driving in the direction of the school, all I can think to myself is that I hope a truck blows through a stop sign, plows into the Honda, and kills us both instantly.

I remember when I was a little kid, I felt like anything that was wrong, my mom could hug me and make it right again. But there is no way for her to make any of this right again. Part of growing up is figuring out that your parents don’t have that ability anymore.

And as I put the finishing touches on my husband’s grave in the woods, I recite to myself the poem he once wrote for me many years ago, back when I was fifteen years old and he was my English teacher fresh out of college who swore to me I was his soulmate: Life nearly passed me by Then she Young and alive With smooth hands And pink cheeks Showed me myself Took away my breath With cherry-red lips Gave me life once again

I have a message on Snapflash. I downloaded that app about four months ago—I heard about the kids at school using it, because it has the feature of text messages and images disappearing exactly sixty seconds after you open them.

Things will never be the way they used to be between the two of us. Not since Hudson helped me kill my father.

Hell, I would set myself on fire if only I didn’t have to walk through the doors of Caseham High. I can’t say it enough. I don’t want to go to school.

If she were dead, I could still keep my job, and we could still be together.

I must have swallowed a few too many horseshoe Lucky Charms, because I am having amazing luck.

After sliding into a pair of pantyhose, I slip my feet into a pair of black Jimmy Choo stiletto pumps. It’s only after I’ve got them on my feet that I notice Nate is watching me, his brown tie hanging loose around his neck. “Eve,” he says. I already know what he’s going to say, and I’m hoping he won’t say it. “Hmm?” “Are those new shoes?” “These?” I don’t lift my eyes. “No. These are years old. In fact, I think I wore them on the first day of school last year.” “Oh. Okay…

I love my mom, and I know why. She makes me food so I don’t die.

Addie was a troubled girl. The daughter of an abusive alcoholic who finally drank himself to death during the fall semester. Everyone felt that she was an obvious target for a predatory teacher.

I’m trying to resist you,” he murmurs. “You have no idea how badly I’m trying.” “You don’t have to.

The worst part of all though is the shiver of excitement that goes through me at the possibility that Lotus could be right.

I’m so elated you could make it!

must have swallowed a few too many horseshoe Lucky Charms, because I am having amazing luck.

An hour later, I am sitting in the kitchen with an empty tub of rocky road ice cream,

He truly believes all those things were enough to make him a good husband. That you can check all the right boxes, and it’s okay, even if you don’t love your wife.

few years ago, Nate said something about how presents didn’t make sense when we’re sharing the same money.

But even after I hit her, I still feel the rage coursing through my fingertips. So I hit her again.

My wife had an unhealthy obsession with shoes, and it is an apt punishment for her crimes to spend all of eternity in her bare feet.

It’s part of our routine. Three kisses per day, sex once a month, and Nate is always the one who drives.

If she’s ever too hard on you,” he says, “let me know. Seriously.” I will seriously never let him know.

Every time somebody gave him a chance, he would show up drunk for work and get fired.

People don't make movies about women like me.

When I realize what she’s looking at, my heart drops into my stomach.

A piece of smashed pumpkin on the heel of the shoe.

There is one other person who knows just enough to bury me, and if that person is the one taunting me, I am in deep, deep trouble.

Of all the people I would have imagined might be at my door, this is the last person I expected to see there.

I imagine dying is like standing on the precipice of that abyss, knowing that you will fall in at any second. It is my greatest fear, after snakes.

If I were a cat, I would have peed on him, but since I’m a human, I plant a kiss on his lips

Plus, eventually I will graduate from high school, and I will get to date whoever I

want. But if Nathaniel is still with his wife, he will be trapped. If only Mrs. Bennett weren’t around. It would be so much better.

now I’m thirty-eight, and I’m meeting my soulmate for the first time, and she’s only sixteen.” He grimaces. “How cruel is this universe?

So when Mr. Tuttle was nice to me,

if your shoes don’t make you at least three inches taller, it’s hardly even worth it. You might as well wear socks.

Digging a grave is hard work. My whole body hurts. Muscles I didn’t even know I had are screaming with pain. Every time I lift the shovel and scoop out a little more dirt, it feels like a knife is digging into a muscle behind my shoulder blade. I thought it was all bone, but clearly, I was wrong. I am acutely aware of every single muscle fiber in my whole body, and all of them hurt. So much.

It’s part of our routine. Three kisses per day, sex once a month, and Nate is always the one who drives. I am so lucky. I have a beautiful house, a fulfilling career, and a husband who is kind and mild mannered and incredibly handsome. And as Nate pulls the car onto the road and starts driving in the direction of the school, all I can think to myself is that I hope a truck blows through a stop sign, plows into the Honda, and kills us both instantly.

He doesn’t care if all we do is kiss.

After today, he won’t be my problem ever again.

Eve knows a little bit more about me than I’m comfortable with.

The pink in her cheeks has morphed into a bright red color.

I watch him walk away until the sound of his boots crunching on the leaves vanishes into the wind.

The soles of the shoes are covered in dirt.

I saw the poem,” she says.

I was fifteen years old and he was my English teacher fresh out of college

Eve was the only one who knew the truth, and she didn’t tell anyone.

What is this?” Kenzie blurts out. She shakes the piece of paper violently enough to crumple it.

Later, Jay,

Kenzie bows her head, nodding slowly. The detective is quiet, waiting for Kenzie to say something more, but she seems too choked up to say another word. Even though it was her idea to come here, she doesn’t look like she can go on. She squeezes her knees with her chewed-up fingernails as her eyes fill with tears. I always thought Kenzie seemed so mature, but right now, she looks so young. Like a little girl. She was only fourteen when Nathaniel slept with her. Fourteen. And Nathaniel…he’s almost forty! He’s an adult. Our teacher. I was hurt when I realized that Nathaniel lied to me, but this is the first time that it all hits home.

Now, Addie,” the detective says, “tell me what happened to Eve Bennett.” And I do. I tell her everything.

At one point, I drove by Simon’s Shoes, which used to be Eve’s favorite shoe store, and for a moment, a wave of sorrow came over me. I used to love her. I truly did.

I wonder if Addie broke and told her about the two of us. Even worse, what if Kenzie went to the police? That would be cataclysmic. Kenzie was only fourteen when our relationship commenced. If she goes to the police, I’m in deep trouble. The kind of trouble where I’ll be wearing an orange jumpsuit, and when I get out, I won’t be able to live a certain radius from a playground. That kind of trouble.

To be fair, Kenzie didn’t look fourteen. She was exquisitely beautiful. More beautiful than 99 percent of all grown women out there. Most people don’t understand what it’s like, to have all these beautiful young girls throwing themselves at you year in and year out. I’m not made of stone.

My husband is quiet then, lost in thought. He always seems like he’s a million miles away these days. We have the same job, so it seems like it should be easy to come up with something to say to each other, yet we can’t. We have become strangers to each other.

I want you to write an angry letter to the person who took your clothes,” he says. I start to protest, but then he adds, “Not a poem, but a letter. You don’t have to use their name, but I want you to get out that anger. Let your anger out on the page for me. Tell me what you want to do to this person.

Mr. Bennett hugs me back, not pushing me away even as I cling to him. The hug lasts far longer than I intended it to, but I don’t want to let go of him, and he doesn’t seem to mind either. But then something firm pokes me in the leg. Like a roll of toilet paper. Oh my God. Is that…?

can’t resist you. I’m helpless.

The way Mr. Bennett—I mean, Nathaniel—touched me. The feel of his lips on mine set every single nerve in my body on fire. And really, all we did was kiss. He didn’t even try to do more than that. He told me he wasn’t going to. This is all I dreamed of doing with him.

This is so wild. Usually, we have sex, like, a dozen times the entire year, and now suddenly he wants me two days in a row. And his behavior seems strange. It almost feels like he’s hungry for me, like he’s ready to rip my clothing off, which is unusual for him. I haven’t seen this kind of passion from him in so many years.

You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met, Addie.

I lose my virginity to Nathaniel in the darkroom that afternoon, and the whole time, I recite his poem in my head, written just for me.

look over at Nathaniel, but he is looking away. It’s like he’s refusing to catch my gaze. If I couldn’t concentrate before, it’s about a thousand times worse now. I don’t understand what happened. He told me he entered me in that contest. Was he lying? No, Nathaniel would never lie to me. We know each other too well for that. Except I can’t come up with another explanation. I try to catch him after the bell rings, but he takes off like a flash, and I’m left behind, my head still spinning. We’re supposed to meet after he’s done with the school paper, but I can’t wait that long. So I grab my phone and send him a message in Snapflash: What happened? I thought you entered me in that contest? Thankfully, his reply comes soon after: I promise I’ll explain everything when we meet. I stare at the words on the screen, which don’t explain anything. But at least he admits he has explaining to do. On top of that, he ends up being twenty minutes late for our liaison in the darkroom. I stand there waiting for him, getting more and more irritated, and when the door finally opens, I’m ready to jump out of my skin.

But then something happens to make me forget all about the hand-holding. Something happens that makes hand-holding seem like…well, hand-holding. Something that makes me want to throw up the few leaves of my salad that I managed to choke down. He’s kissing her. No, he’s not just kissing her. It looks like he’s trying to figure out how her lunch tasted. That kiss… That’s not a first kiss. That’s a kiss between two people who have kissed many times before and probably done a lot of other things. And now it all makes sense.

As for Addie, the truth is she doesn’t deserve it either. Whatever else I can say about her, she is only sixteen years old. She’s a child. It’s not her fault she fell in love with her handsome English teacher. It was Nate’s responsibility to keep this from happening.

You know, I was always good to you. I never lost my temper. I never complained when you bought five billion pairs of shoes.” He kicks the luggage containing all my hidden shoes. “I came home every single night. What more did you want from me?” He looks up at me, and I realize this isn’t a rhetorical question. He truly believes all those things were enough to make him a good husband. That you can check all the right boxes, and it’s okay, even if you don’t love your wife. Even if you cheat on her with a little girl.

She also kicked me out of the house. I hope the ceiling falls on her and kills her. So do I. If she were dead, I could still keep my job, and we could still be together. I stare at the words on the screen. If she were dead, I could still keep my job, and we could still be together. I read them five times before they vanish, and I am left wondering once again what he really meant. If she were dead, I could still keep my job, and we could still be together.

This entire day feels surreal. I caught my husband kissing one of his sixteen-year-old students. He was having sex with her. Now I have thrown him out, and as soon as I can, I’m going to file for divorce. I don’t need a lawyer. He’s going to give me everything I want—everything I deserve. Or else.

She starts chewing on her fingernail again. “Because he didn’t write it for you.” “Yes, he did. Trust me.” “No.” She shakes her head. “He wrote it for me.

The truth is, I’m not sure I want to know. In the end, I recognize that it will be Nathaniel’s word versus mine. And he’s going to deny everything.

I think…” My breath catches in my throat. “I may need some convincing.” That’s when he grabs me. And lowers his lips onto mine.

It started about four months ago. It was innocent enough at first. I was at Simon’s to buy a pair of shoes. Somehow, I keep thinking the right pair of shoes will fix everything. Like if I walked into our house in the perfect pair of pumps, suddenly Nate would find me attractive again.

He just reaches out, places his hands on either of my shoulders, and starts massaging. “What are you doing?” I say. “It’s been a long night,” he says. “You’ve seemed so tense lately, Eve, and I feel bad. I feel like it’s my fault.” “It’s not your fault,” I say, and it’s only partially a lie. Nate kneads his fingers deeper into my flesh. “Does this help at all?” I want to tell him that I have no interest in a massage right now, but actually, it does feel quite nice. I hadn’t realized how much tension was in my shoulders until he started rubbing them. I forgot how good Nate is at massages. “Lie down,” he instructs me.

I was only fourteen, Addie.” Her lower lip trembles. “I feel so stupid for believing everything he told me and letting him do all that stuff to me. It messed me up so bad. I just want to keep him from doing it to anyone else.” She sniffles loudly. “Please come with me.” Her shaky voice is breaking my resolve—I’ve never seen her be anything but perfectly poised. I wring my hands together. “They’re probably not even going to believe us. I don’t have any proof at all. We only talked on Snapflash, and all those messages are gone.” “Nate and I talked on Snapflash too,” she says. “But I took screenshots.” “You did?” She bobs her head. “At the time, I did it because I wanted to remember what he was saying to me. But they’re all there. All the lies he told me.” She digs into the bag hanging off her shoulder and pulls out her phone. She brings up a photo on the screen, and that’s when I see it. You’re my soulmate. The same words he had written for me. But for Kenzie. I’m

Nevermore.

They buried me without any shoes on. If only I had taken those few seconds to put on my sneakers before I confronted Addie in the kitchen, this journey back to the road would be much easier. Instead, I am carefully picking my way along the uneven dirt, branches stabbing the soles of my feet.

Tis some visitor, tapping on my chamber door. If there’s nobody at the door again, I am going to lose my damn mind.

Kenzie had an affair with Nathaniel, but what I did is much worse. I helped him bury a dead body. And I’m not even entirely sure which of us was the one who killed her.

I recite to myself the poem he once wrote for me many years ago, back when I was fifteen years old and he was my English teacher fresh out of college who swore to me I was his soulmate: Life nearly passed me by Then she Young and alive With smooth hands And pink cheeks Showed me myself Took away my breath With cherry-red lips Gave me life once again

He’s been carrying her for the last fifteen minutes, which makes me wonder if dead bodies are heavier or lighter than alive bodies.

E sapatos de salto agulha que poderiam ser usados para arrancar os olhos de alguém.

My twenties are over. In another blink of an eye, I’ll be forty and my thirties will be gone too. Then one day, I’ll be lying on this bed, ninety years old, and wondering where my whole life went.

of poetry—maybe Poe—and I would just love to hear his thoughts on each of them. Even though that’s what we do in class every day, I would never get sick of it. Not in a million billion years. Doesn’t Mrs. Bennett realize how incredible her husband is? When all my clothes got soaked today and she made me sit through her lesson and even repeat my homework, it was like she didn’t care. Or worse, she thought I deserved to suffer. He was the only one who noticed how uncomfortable I was and sent me home. She doesn’t appreciate being married to someone who is so kind and considerate, because she’s the opposite. “Well, if that’s all you’re going to eat,” Mom says, “I may as well get the check.” I don’t want to leave the restaurant. While I’m sitting here, it’s almost like I’m having dinner with Mr. Bennett, even though that’s kind of dumb because he is across the entire dining room and he doesn’t even know that I’m here. We are about as far from having dinner together as possible, yet I still don’t want to leave. “Wait,” I say, “let me go to the bathroom first, then I’ll eat some more.” My mother looks skeptical, but what is she supposed to say—I can’t use the bathroom? So I follow the signs to the hidden hallway that contains the bathroom.

I didn’t mean to do that. I didn’t come to this house with the intention of bashing my math teacher on the head with a frying pan.

He has no power over me.