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I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
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Emo Philips
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As the comedian Emo Phillips once said, “When I was a child, I used to pray to God for a bicycle. But then I realized that God doesn’t work in that way—so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness!
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Daniel C. Dennett (Breaking the Spell: Religion as a Natural Phenomenon)
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When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.
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Peter Kay
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I asked god for a bike, but i know god doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
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Mario Puzo (The Godfather)
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When I was a child, I used to pray to God for a bicycle. But then I realized that God doesn’t work in that way—so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness!
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Daniel C. Dennett (Breaking the Spell: Religion as a Natural Phenomenon)
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I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. -Al Pacino
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Sapphire Knight (Gangster (Chicago Crew))
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Can you pick me up on Washington Road in Mount Lebo, actually? I got here and them some kids stole my bike."
"Quinn, your life story is starting to turn into a documentary that people would walk out of because it's both too sad and too slow.
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Tim Federle (The Great American Whatever)
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She spoke into his ear. “You just mugged a guy. Stole his motorcycle.” “Not how I see it.” “How do you see it?” “Colonel Dai just bought a used dirt bike in Vietnam. I was kind of the middleman.” “Tell yourself whatever works, Violator.
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Mark Greaney (Gunmetal Gray (Gray Man, #6))
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You did too! You stole my bike, A-HOLE!" I yell out. Jeez, I'm like a Chatty Cathy Doll: just pull my string and I'll say, "You stole my bike, A-HOLE!
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Brent Crawford (Carter Finally Gets It (Carter Finally Gets It, #1))
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Lambretta
It doesn't get much better
Though I'm trying to forget her
That girl on that Lambretta
Stole my heart.
But my feelings just got fonder
As she disappeared off yonder
But I couldn't get my Honda
Bike to start.
So I'll admit defeat
It's not partial, it's complete
'Cos I'll never get to meet
That work of art.
Now I've ceased to be a suitor
I imagine that'll suit her
An' I 'ope her rotten scooter
Falls apart.
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Robbie Franklin (The Ipswich Bus)
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the city is cold and hard like that bike I stole from your front yard.
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Le
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Each time someone stole a bike from our porch (three times, by my count), or broke into her car and took the loose change, or stole a delivery, she’d tell me, like a general giving his troops marching orders, “There is nothing lower than the poor stealing from the poor. It’s hard enough as it is. We sure as hell don’t need to make it even harder on each other.” Youngest
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J.D. Vance (Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis)
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Canadian comedian, Emo Phillips, said he used to pray every night for a bike until he realised that the Lord doesn’t always work that way, so he stole one and then prayed for forgiveness.
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James Clarke (Blazing Bicycle Saddles)
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I loved you enough to bug you about where you were going, with whom and what time you would get home. I loved you enough to insist you buy a bike with your own money even though we could afford it. I loved you enough to be silent and let you discover your friend was a creep. I loved you enough to make you return a Milky Way with a bite out of it to the drugstore and confess, “I stole this.” I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours while you cleaned your bedroom, a job that would have taken me 15 minutes. I loved you enough to say, “Yes, you can go to Disney World on Mother’s Day.” I loved you enough to let you see anger, disappointment, disgust and tears in my eyes. I loved you enough not to make excuses for your lack of respect or your bad manners. I loved you enough to admit that I was wrong and ask for your forgiveness. I loved you enough to ignore what every other mother did or said. I loved you enough to let you stumble, fall, hurt and fail. I loved you enough to let you assume the responsibility for your own actions at age 6, 10 or 16. I loved you enough to figure you would lie about the party being chaperoned but forgave you for it—after discovering I was right. I loved you enough to accept you for what you are, not what I wanted you to be. But, most of all, I loved you enough to say no when you hated me for it. That was the hardest part of all.
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Erma Bombeck (Forever, Erma)
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During those witching hours growing up in 1970s Los Angeles, I banded together with other untethered children. We dared each other to jump from my second-story bedroom window into thick ivy below. We roamed the neighborhood on our bikes, stole candy from the supermarket, and tried out the confessional box at St. Bernard’s even though we weren’t Catholic.
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Andrea Jarrell (I'm the One Who Got Away)
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Rey thought you’d like the pink ones better, seeing as you stole her ‘Barbie bike,’ as she calls it.” Rey
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Milana Jacks (Wild Beast Mate (Beast Mates, #2))
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Look, I don’t mean to make light of your midlife crisis or the fact that your drunk dad stole your bike when you were eight years old and you still haven’t gotten over it, but when it comes down to it, if you feel crappy it’s because your brain is telling you that there’s a problem that’s unaddressed or unresolved.
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Mark Manson (The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life)
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When I was a kid, I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized, the Lord doesn’t work that way. So I just stole one and asked Him for forgiveness. — Emo Philips
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Mike C. Erickson (Pianist in a Bordello)