Revision Funny Quotes

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SAINT, n. A dead sinner revised and edited.
Ambrose Bierce (The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary)
A good approach is to allow one dream per novel. Then, in the final revision, go back and get rid of that, too.
Howard Mittelmark (How Not to Write a Novel: 200 Classic Mistakes and How to Avoid Them—A Misstep-by-Misstep Guide)
One day, perhaps, we will have become legends. We'll pass this way outside of space or time, When what they'll know of us will be just questions They'll carve our deeds in stone. Build us in rhyme. The things they'll tell about us will be lies But lies of such a kind as tell a truth Perpetual. Our lives will be revised. Preserved, we'll mouth the epics of our youth. Actors will play us, braver than we are, More funny, deeper, prettier by far. Their lines will be more resonant and wise Than anything we said. Majestic lies. So wait. Such tales might be the truth one day. For now, alive, we huddle, ache and pray.
Neil Gaiman (The Sandman: Overture)
Walking out of an A level paper isn't funny." "It's not that I'm laughing at." "So what is it?" "No one ever tells you when you're doing all that course work and revision and timed essays and study skills that it's an option." "But it isn't an option." "It is, because I just took it.
Rosamund Lupton (Afterwards)
I like to skip prewriting. I love just jumping into the actual writing process. Then I revise/edit and fix what I need to. Then the following steps; proofread and publish. Of course before you just go into writing, it would be a good idea to do some charts of each chapter...what you would want each one to be about and have a character list with their personalities and how they will come into play in your book. I mean, you wouldn't just want to go all crazy and jot down all kinds of random stuff at me, you'll go crazy. With writing, you take it as it comes, go with your own flow.-Nina Jean Slack
Nina Jean Slack
Birth parents never lose their role as those who gave birth to the child. The child’s connection to the past is through this birth mother and father and their genes and stories. The story may be sad, or hard, or even horrible, but it is the true story for a child who is adopted. The fact of adoption means that the birth parents do not have the role of “parent.” It does not mean that they do not have the role of caring, and thinking about the child, and maybe even wishing things had been different. We continue to have funny notions about what a birth parent is. If we care about the children, we must have some positive and even loving thoughts about the people who gave them life.
Joyce Maguire Pavao (The Family of Adoption: Completely Revised and Updated)
The funny thing is, thinking back, I don't think all these modern gizmos actually make you any more productive. Hierarchical file systems—how do they make you more productive? Most of software development goes on in your head anyway. I think having worked with that simpler system imposes a kind of disciplined way of thinking. If you haven't got a directory system and you have to put all the files in one directory, you have to be fairly disciplined. If you haven't got a revision control system, you have to be fairly disciplined. Given that you apply that discipline to what you're doing it doesn't seem to me to be any better to have hierarchical file systems and revision control. They don't solve the fundamental problem of solving your problem. They probably make it easier for groups of people to work together. For individuals I don't see any difference.
Peter Seibel (Coders at Work: Reflections on the Craft of Programming)
Jamie is a funny mix. He has a sardonic side that can make him seem distant and almost harsh to people who don’t know him well, but he’s also very tender-hearted. (A
Gretchen Rubin (The Happiness Project (Revised Edition): Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun)
I was watching a documentary that described a night at Thomas Jefferson’s house Monticello. After the meal each night the family, with their guests, would retire into the parlor to drink tea and spend 3-4 hours discussing things they learned or were pondering lately. Without the television or other individualistic electronic means of entertainment I think we’d still do this to avoid boredom. When I first heard about this practice my first thought was, “Oh, that’s what a family does.” I grew up in an age where it was natural to entertain myself or go off with friends but it makes sense that, in the absence of these things, a family would need to learn to interact and really enjoy each other’s company. So 3-4 times per week we have an informal meal followed by what we simply call “family time.” This can be done around the dining room table or the coffee table but it’s been an amazing experience. I begin by asking if anyone learned or had any ideas or questions they’ve been pondering about God. We move from that topic into a more general question like, “Did anyone learn anything today or have something they want to discuss?” We share stories from the day, passages of things we’ve read, watch funny videos or play a family game. At the end we often talk about what’s in store for tomorrow and pray together.
Jeremy Pryor (Family Revision: How Ancient Wisdom Can Heal the Modern Family)
Question & Answer!! Academic: They ask question, listen answer! Police: They ask question, not accept your answer! Politician: They ask question, they give the answer! Scientist: They ask question, question the answer! Children: They ask question as long as you give answer! Religion: All questions have same answer! Teacher: They ask question, correct your answer! Student: They ask question, forget the answer! Guilty: Answer before question! Arrogant: Ask question, does not care answer! Wife: Asks question, asks the answer – twice!
Abhijit Kar Gupta (Scientific Computing in Python (Revised edition, Python 3))
The Things They Carried has sold over two million copies internationally, won numerous awards, and is an English classroom staple. Isabel Allende was the first writer to hold me inside a sentence, rapt and wondrous. It's no surprise that her most transformative writing springs from personal anguish. Her first book, The House of the Spirits, began as a letter to her dying grandfather whom she could not reach in time. Eva Luna, one of my favorite novels, is about an orphan girl who uses her storytelling gift to survive and thrive amid trauma, and Allende refers to the healing power of writing in many of her interviews. Allende's books have sold over fifty-six million copies, been translated into thirty languages, and been made into successful plays and movies. Such is the power of mining your deep. Jeanette Winterson acknowledges that her novel Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit is her own story of growing up gay in a fundamentalist Christian household in the 1950s. She wrote it to create psychic space from the trauma. In her memoir, she writes of Oranges, “I wrote a story I could live with. The other one was too painful. I could not survive it.” Sherman Alexie, who grew up in poverty on an Indian reservation that as a child he never dreamed he could leave, does something similar in his young adult novel, The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-time Indian, named one of the “Best Books of 2007” by School Library Journal. He has said that fictionalizing life is so satisfying because he can spin the story better than real life did. Nora Ephron's roman à clef Heartburn is a sharply funny, fictionalized account of Ephron's own marriage to Carl Bernstein. She couldn't control his cheating during her pregnancy or the subsequent dissolution of their marriage, but through the novelization of her experience, she got to revise the ending of that particular story. In Heartburn, Rachel, the character based on Ephron, is asked
Jessica Lourey (Rewrite Your Life: Discover Your Truth Through the Healing Power of Fiction)
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.' I've revised this saying to make it more accurate: 'What doesn't kill you puts you in a whole lot of pain and makes you cry a lot and want to crawl in a hole forever and live with rodents.
Ellen DeGeneres (The Funny Thing Is...)