Reputation Funny Quotes

We've searched our database for all the quotes and captions related to Reputation Funny. Here they are! All 25 of them:

Did you see that dress?” "I saw the dress.” "Did you like it?” He didn't answer. I took that as a yes. "Am I going to endanger my reputation if I wear it to the dance?” When he spoke, I could barely hear him. "You'll endanger the school.” I smiled and fell asleep.
Richelle Mead (Vampire Academy (Vampire Academy, #1))
Maybe you’re not so bad after all.’ He leant across the seat, jabbing his finger in the air. ‘If you tell anyone, I’ll deny it. I have a reputation to uphold, you know.
Catherine Doyle (Inferno (Blood for Blood, #2))
You cannot really shame a man who sincerely does not care what others think of him.
Mokokoma Mokhonoana
While we’re at it, why don’t we add a third emotion to this list: lust. You are probably unaware that Linnaeus lumped the tomato into the same genus as the potato, a food with a reputation for its widespread availability and easy satisfaction of oral needs.
Benson Bruno (A Story That Talks about Talking Is Like Chatter to Chattering Teeth, and Every Set of Dentures Can Attest to the Fact That No..)
This wasn’t what she expected. Never, in her wildest dreams. This... this was the Blood Queen of Garbhán Isle? Scourge of the Madron lands? Destroyer of Villages? Demon Killer of Women and Children? She who had blood pacts with the darkest of gods? This was Annwyl the Bloody? Talaith watched, fascinated, as Annwyl held onto Morfyd the Witch’s wrists. Morfyd — the Black Witch of Despair, Killer of the Innocent, Annihilator of Souls, and all around Mad Witch of Garbhán Isle or so she was called on the Madron lands — had actually tried to sneak up on Annwyl to put ointment on the nasty wound the queen had across her face. But as soon as the warrior saw her, she squealed and grabbed hold of her. Now Annwyl lay on her back, Morfyd over her, trying her best to get Annwyl to stop being a ten year old. “If you just let me—” “No! Get that centaur shit away from me, you demon bitch!” “Annwyl, I’m not letting you go home to my brother looking like that. You look horrific.” “He’ll have to love me in spite of it. Now get off!” ... “Ow!” “Crybaby.” No, this isn’t what Talaith expected. Annwyl the Blood Queen was supposed to be a vicious, uncaring warrior bent on revenge and power. She let her elite guard rape and and pillage wherever they went, and she used babies as target practice while their mothers watched in horror. That’s what she was supposed to be and that’s what Talaith expected to find. Instead, she found Annwyl. Just Annwyl. A warrior who spent most of her resting time reading or mooning over her consort. She was silly, charming, very funny, and fiercely protective of everyone. Her elite guard, all handpicked by Annwyl, were sweet, vicious fighters and blindingly loyal to their queen.
G.A. Aiken (About a Dragon (Dragon Kin, #2))
It's always struck me as funny that guys with scars get a reputation for being hard. It's the ones that cut them you should be looking out for, right?
Louise Welsh (Naming the Bones)
Some disabled people spend a significant amount of their energy on trying to come across as abled or as not that disabled.
Mokokoma Mokhonoana
Her eyes narrowed, and her lips parted around a knowing laugh. "Oh. It's you." "Pardon?" He was taken aback. "Do we know each other, lass?" He was quite certain they didn't; he could never have forgotten this woman. The enticing manner in which her lips were currently pursed would have been seared into his memory. "The answer is no. I don't know you. But every other woman in this room does. Duncan Douglas, isn't it?" she said dryly. Duncan studied her face. Although she was young-perhaps no more than twenty-she had a regal bearing beyond her years. "I do have some reputation with the lasses," he conceded, downplaying his prowess, confident of her impending maidenly swoon. The look she gave him was far from admiring. He did a double take when he realized her gaze was downright disparaging. "Not something I care for in a man," she said coolly. "Thank you for your offer, but I'd sooner dance with last week's rushes. They would be less used. Who wants what everyone else has already had?" The words were delivered in a cool, modulated tone, shaped by an odd accent he couldn't place. Quite finished with him, she presented her back and resumed talking to her companion. Duncan was immobilized by shock.
Karen Marie Moning (The Highlander's Touch (Highlander, #3))
I was obligated to be nice. I couldn’t be the one Canadian who ruined the country’s reputation. How could I live with myself if I caused a Yankee to say, “I used to think Canadians were so nice, then I met that asshole, Steve”?
Steven Barker (Now for the Disappointing Part: A Pseudo-Adult’s Decade of Short-Term Jobs, Long-Term Relationships, and Holding Out for Something Better)
Isn't it funny how far we will go to be with someone we think we love. A grown man will behave like a young boy, a young boy will do everything he can to appear like a grown man. We'll risk our reputations, sacrifice our worldly possessions, defy our parents, even our religious beliefs. We'll do illogical and foolish things, things that are impractical, wasteful, just for a moment of what we think is ecstasy on earth.
V.C. Andrews (All That Glitters (Landry, #3))
People go funny in the head when talking about politics. The evolutionary reasons for this are so obvious as to be worth belaboring: In the ancestral environment, politics was a matter of life and death. And sex, and wealth, and allies, and reputation... When, today, you get into an argument about whether "we" ought to raise the minimum wage, you're executing adaptations for an ancestral environment where being on the wrong side of the argument could get you killed. Being on the right side of the argument could let you kill your hated rival! [...] Politics is an extension of war by other means. Arguments are soldiers. Once you know which side you're on, you must support all arguments of that side, and attack all arguments that appear to favor the enemy side; otherwise it's like stabbing your soldiers in the back—providing aid and comfort to the enemy. People who would be level-headed about evenhandedly weighing all sides of an issue in their professional life as scientists, can suddenly turn into slogan-chanting zombies when there's a Blue or Green position on an issue.
Eliezer Yudkowsky
I probably should say that this is what makes you a good traveler in my opinion, but deep down I really think this is just universal, incontrovertible truth. There is the right way to travel, and the wrong way. And if there is one philanthropic deed that can come from this book, maybe it will be that I teach a few more people how to do it right. So, in short, my list of what makes a good traveler, which I recommend you use when interviewing your next potential trip partner: 1. You are open. You say yes to whatever comes your way, whether it’s shots of a putrid-smelling yak-butter tea or an offer for an Albanian toe-licking. (How else are you going to get the volcano dust off?) You say yes because it is the only way to really experience another place, and let it change you. Which, in my opinion, is the mark of a great trip. 2. You venture to the places where the tourists aren’t, in addition to hitting the “must-sees.” If you are exclusively visiting places where busloads of Chinese are following a woman with a flag and a bullhorn, you’re not doing it. 3. You are easygoing about sleeping/eating/comfort issues. You don’t change rooms three times, you’ll take an overnight bus if you must, you can go without meat in India and without vegan soy gluten-free tempeh butter in Bolivia, and you can shut the hell up about it. 4. You are aware of your travel companions, and of not being contrary to their desires/​needs/​schedules more often than necessary. If you find that you want to do things differently than your companions, you happily tell them to go on without you in a way that does not sound like you’re saying, “This is a test.” 5. You can figure it out. How to read a map, how to order when you can’t read the menu, how to find a bathroom, or a train, or a castle. 6. You know what the trip is going to cost, and can afford it. If you can’t afford the trip, you don’t go. Conversely, if your travel companions can’t afford what you can afford, you are willing to slum it in the name of camaraderie. P.S.: Attractive single people almost exclusively stay at dumps. If you’re looking for them, don’t go posh. 7. You are aware of cultural differences, and go out of your way to blend. You don’t wear booty shorts to the Western Wall on Shabbat. You do hike your bathing suit up your booty on the beach in Brazil. Basically, just be aware to show the culturally correct amount of booty. 8. You behave yourself when dealing with local hotel clerks/​train operators/​tour guides etc. Whether it’s for selfish gain, helping the reputation of Americans traveling abroad, or simply the spreading of good vibes, you will make nice even when faced with cultural frustrations and repeated smug “not possible”s. This was an especially important trait for an American traveling during the George W. years, when the world collectively thought we were all either mentally disabled or bent on world destruction. (One anecdote from that dark time: in Greece, I came back to my table at a café to find that Emma had let a nearby [handsome] Greek stranger pick my camera up off our table. He had then stuck it down the front of his pants for a photo. After he snapped it, he handed the camera back to me and said, “Show that to George Bush.” Which was obviously extra funny because of the word bush.) 9. This last rule is the most important to me: you are able to go with the flow in a spontaneous, non-uptight way if you stumble into something amazing that will bump some plan off the day’s schedule. So you missed the freakin’ waterfall—you got invited to a Bahamian family’s post-Christening barbecue where you danced with three generations of locals in a backyard under flower-strewn balconies. You won. Shut the hell up about the waterfall. Sally
Kristin Newman (What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding)
Sensing that this stranger was not the dangerous kind, and being the caring, big-hearted dog that he had built his reputation on, Lucky decided that a good dose of tongue licking would put matters right. However, in a twist of bad timing, unluckily for Lucky, he landed his lick just as Felicity rolled over onto her back. So, instead of a friendly lick across the ears as he intended, Lucky’s long slobbery, pink tongue made a trail from Felicity’s chin to her cherry red lips and up to her forehead. ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGHHHH!
Kaal Kaczmarek (Cousin Felicity and the Eels of Misty Point (The Misty Point Adventures))
Obviously, I didn’t pursue that girl any longer, and I didn’t think about Missy much after our so-called date, mainly because I didn’t think she was interested in me. But then a few days later, one of our mutual friends from church called me. She told me Missy couldn’t stop thinking about me. I didn’t find out until several months later that the friend also called Missy that night and told her I really liked her! Neither one of us thought much about our fake date, but our friend decided to play matchmaker. The next time I saw Missy was at a youth meeting at the Kelletts’ house. Oddly enough, Missy’s family had lived in the same house for years until Mike and his family bought it. After the meeting I decided to check the credibility of our mutual friend who told me Missy was interested in me. We were outside and Missy was telling me stories of when she used to live there. I led her to the backyard and after she finished a story, I made my move. I turned and planted a juicy lip lock on her, to which she responded enthusiastically. I just wanted to see if she was interested in me and I got the answer. I have to admit I felt a spark or two during the encounter. It was nice! Missy remembers a few more details of our early dating. Missy: During our mock date, I also felt like we had a great time together. However, because we had mutually agreed to go out on this public-relations date, I would have never assumed anything more. I am not an aggressive person, and even though I felt something between us, I would have never made the first move! That’s why, when Jason dropped me off, I just got out of the truck and went inside. He obviously hadn’t asked me out because he thought I was pretty, funny, or interesting. In my mind, this was just business, whether I liked it or not. And I didn’t like it. I was definitely attracted to him, but where I came from and the way I was raised, it was the boy’s responsibility to make the first move. And he didn’t, at least not that night. When my friend called me a few days later and told me that he liked me, I was surprised and thrilled! Little did I know that she’d done the same thing to Jason. The night after our first kiss at our youth minister’s house, I remember trying not to get my hopes up. I knew about his reputation of dating as many girls as possible, and I thought there was a great chance that I would never hear from him again. However, I decided to go outside my comfort zone and give him a call. One of his mom’s friends answered the phone and when I asked to speak to Jason, she told me he was on his way to his girlfriend’s house. I hung up, feeling dejected. About fifteen minutes later, he showed up at my house. I was the girlfriend!
Jase Robertson (Good Call: Reflections on Faith, Family, and Fowl)
I really don’t understand you. Why are you there in my life? Why are you always making me in confused state of mind? If you have dare to talk in straight way; then please say whatever you want to say. It’s my life, let me live in my way. Can you please stop all these things? Please! It’s my humble request. I don’t know what you are expecting from me but I want to live in my way. Don’t tell me anything. I’m that much capable to protect myself. I need peace. Can you do it for my peace? Please close all these things. See, there is no need to show love, love is not the thing to show. I’m really have doubt about your side now. Your business need your attention, you have diamonds. Please take care of them. As you are perfect; your light side is obviously perfect & shining. I’m mess, unwanted, non-deserving factor on which you are really wasting your valuable time. Please. What I can pay to you to leave all these things? You want to make an issue of this? Already I’m horribly upset in my life. Your suggestions are so confusing, negative, depressive that I’m going in more depression day by day. I can’t understand it. You have done so much good in my life. I don’t want your more favor. As it is, you are doing it all in indirect way, so better don’t do it. I don’t need it, I have my simple life, job, some money. So why are you un-necessary stretching my brain? I don’t want any stress in my life. Please if want to see smile on face then close all these thoughts. I’ll make sure that I’ll not write anything after closing of the thoughts. I don’t have any hopes from you, I don’t have any expectations from you, I don’t want my reputation assistance from you, because I know my work will automatically give me reputation. I don’t want anything from you. So please do the last favor. You can spend your subscription on other members. You have so many beautiful options. They will explore your business opportunities. Unwanted & non deserving persons are there to throw the stones. So I’m not interested to make it more funny. You do your part without interrupting on my side please. I’m seriously tired up by these things. Are you listening to me? It’s not words of anger, it’s tiredness. Don’t try to motivate. I want a simple life. Are you there? Listening me? Will you help me? Help me to leave me? Will you leave that river side? For me? I don’t know whether you really loved or not? You clearly denied it. I don’t understand your intentions. Please let me sleep, let me sleep. From so many days I’m not getting sleep, please don’t post any new thought, why you are underestimating me? Am I your enemy? You don’t want to see me? You want to show all writing to world? You want to show my dark side to world? Exactly what? I’m not getting it. I want to sleep but I can’t because of you. You close all these things. Blogs can be changed. You have so many pretty options. Please set their blogs. Please close all these things. Please close all these things. I don’t want anything from you. You don’t worry about anything. You enjoy your life. I’ll not even click on any part after you close all these things. I want it for my peace. Please do it for me. Please do it for me.
I tried to make myself feel better by asking, “What’s the worst thing that could happen?” The answer always came back the same: “We’ll go bankrupt, I’ll lose everybody’s money including my mother’s, I’ll have to lay off all the people who have been working so hard in a very bad economy, all of the customers who trusted me will be screwed, and my reputation will be ruined.” Funny, asking that question never made me feel any better. Then one day I asked myself a different question: “What would I do if we went bankrupt?” The answer that I came up with surprised me: “I’d buy our software, Opsware, which runs in Loudcloud, out of bankruptcy and start a software company.” Opsware was the software that we’d written to automate all the tasks of running the cloud: provisioning servers and networking equipment, deploying applications, recovering the environment in case of disaster, and so forth. Then I asked myself another question: “Is there a way to do that without going bankrupt?
Ben Horowitz (The Hard Thing About Hard Things: Building a Business When There Are No Easy Answers)
It's my job to help the guests, even if I think they'll turn out to be a super-snotty, dripping little twat of distaste and ill repute.
Ren French (Creating a Concierge)
Bill Door had carefully ensured a local reputation as the worst bowman in the entire history of toxophily; it had never occurred to anyone that putting arrows through the hats of bystanders behind him must logically take a lot more skill than merely sending them through a quite large target a mere fifty yards away. It was amazing how many friends you could make by being bad at things, provided you were bad enough to be funny.
Terry Pratchett (Reaper Man (Discworld, #11; Death, #2))
I should need to be a herd of elephants, I thought, and a wilderness of spiders, desperately referring to the animals that are reputed longest lived and most multitudinously eyed, to cope with all of this.
Virginia Woolf (A Room of One's Own)
Yes, I know your reputation,” he continued. “So when we started heating up, I knew something might be wrong. That’s why I asked if you’d been drinking. Even when you said no, I wasn’t sure, but, hell, of course I wanted to think you were just that into me.” Definitely a valid point. “And, let’s be totally honest. If a guy gives a girl a roofie, he’s not looking for a make-out session. If my hands weren’t wandering by that point, they weren’t going to.” He shifted on the branch. “I wish I could prove I didn’t do it, Maya, but I can’t. I can only say that it doesn’t make sense. I’d risk getting the crap beat out of me by Daniel, becoming a total social outcast, and maybe even getting arrested and losing Annie. As much as I like you, one make-out session isn’t worth that. And I do like you, meaning one make-out session definitely isn’t worth that if it’d be the last one I’d ever get.” He looked at me, like he was expecting to see something in my face, and when he didn’t, he frowned. “I do like you, Maya. You get that, right?” “Why?” His frown deepened. “Why what?” “Why do you like me?” He laughed. “Do you want a list? Smart, pretty, funny--” “That’s not what I--” I shook my head. “Never mind.
Kelley Armstrong (The Gathering (Darkness Rising, #1))
Patti Smith wrote to me in Amsterdam in 1971, and she said, 'I always loved you because you could find the laughter loophole in any tragedy.' If you're going to be up close with life, the one perk you get from experiencing pain is that you also get to experience what is hysterically funny about it. There's something just so absurd about life that is quirky and weird. For instance, there is something completely funny - a laughter loophole - in most of the rapes that happened to me. In Bad Reputation! I tell the story of this guy who tied my legs together, and I thought, 'Well, how's he going to rape me if he ties my legs together?' I guess everybody has those experiences. It's a way to maintain sanity. The reason why I chose realism was because I was just so stunned by how crazy real life is. I suppose because my early experiences were with camp - with Vaccaro, for example- everything has been a sideshow carnival. I wanted to show the ridiculousness of reality. (from an Interview with Dominic Johnson)
Penny Arcade
A good reputation is sign of success".
Stephen Rayment
But accusations were funny things: once planted they tended to grow. Watered by our access to instant information & fed by immoral media outlets, simply pointing a finger & laying blame was often enough to tarnish even the most unassailable reputation.
Deborah Coonts (Lucky Now and Then (Lucky O'Toole, #3.6))
See Mister, if you are saying about technological analysis then I'm laughing right now, because, you are the admin & controller of that technology. Only you are responsible for the leakage of the data. May be your arrogance & ego did it so. That's the problem dear, I may be straight to the face but people doesn't like it, so you did the same. If people at any work place are gossiping about someone, then a little information is enough to stretch the subject. You played a very nice role, you proved yourself as a perfect & gentleman. I proved as a mess. It's ok. Messy people get the mess only, that's why may be under rated in this world. I couldn't match up with the community. If you are talking about my personal life analysis, then my life partner is the coolest man. He knew my condition, he might had noticed my mind dilemma. He slight had idea about my emotional attachment. But he never shown to me. I told him every possible thing which I could. He can do anything for my happiness. He just want a simple smile on my face, I gave it to him, but he catched that it's fake. It's true that I've forget to smile but I want to make my man proud. I'll make something memorable for him in this life. He loves me a lot, he never restricted me. He has a trust on me that I'll not make any wrong thing in my life. He knows that I'm emotionally injured, but the matter is, he gives me time to heal it by myself. But I can't heal it. I have so many issues in my life, I have loosen the hopes of growth, not because of last experience, but overall tired up. Just I have to spend this time neutrally with current profile. Don't try to give any reference, it's useless, I know, I'll never get worth according to the talent, thank you for this lesson in this life. In the last message, I said you to close all things. You still didn't it. Respected, please do it soon, there is nothing remained. Your business will not be affected by such shits. I have collected all my mess in my bag, cleaned your area very well so that you can shine it with your brilliant family. I don't know, what I get by doing all these things? Actually I get lot of gossips, I get deleted name, I have lost my respect, I have lost my entry, I have lost my hopes, I have lost everything which I could do. It's not like that that is the only place on the world, but I know the importance of it rather than anyone on this Earth. You are the creature of that place, you will find many beautiful options, but never listen some specific some hindi songs," Isme tera ghata", "Pachtaoge", "mera intkam", "Tera ban jaunga", "Ishq me nachenge".Yeah.. It's funny to hear in this serious discussion. But it sounds like you are giving mi "dhamki". So don't be childish, I'm damn disturbed in my life, please don't add some additional fuel in it. You have talented, brilliant, perfect diamonds as you said. Give them a chance. Leave me for this time & life. BDW, congrats for the new project launching & have a great success ahead. Don't support me, I don't need it, more you stay, more I'm getting disturbed. Because I have lose my reputation by my own. I always proud of my that factor, but my honesty kill me. I have to thought first, not everybody will react like me. You did it in right way to keep you in safe. I would like to do it, but I can't do it in my life. I can't lie, I can't act keenly. But remember I have the skill to attract the people by honesty. FYI, I can negotiate also, but will never use it in your case. Another one, starting this relationship is the most ashamed decision in my life, which was not legal from starting but I don't know how I became so insane. This experience gave permanent mark of your spit, this experience dead my all feelings where you celebrate last goodbye, killed my smile where you smiled at my condition, but I have shown scene, so I'm responsible for it. You will read it & whisper "NON-SENSE". That's what I need. You can't committed to me like this way which dying me everyday.
He wanted her to have an abortion? After everything he did? Nicky raised an eyebrow. "Funny how your godly beliefs go out the window when it's your bastard kid and your reputation at stake.
C.J. Tudor (The Chalk Man)