Neuro Linguistic Quotes

Emotions make excellent servants, but tyrannical masters.

Words belong to those who use them only till someone else steals them back.

To strengthen the connection between your conscious and subconscious, is to gain access to a map and compass, as you travel through parallel worlds.

Why be your real self when you can be something really worthwhile?

To believe that someone else is responsible for your emotional state is to give them a sort of psychic power over you they do not have...we really do generate our own feelings. No one else can do it for us. We respond and are responsible. To think other people are responsible for our feelings is to inhabit a billiard ball, inanimate universe.

Life consists of what a man is thinking of all day.

Questions are also interventions. A good question can take a person's mind in a completely new direction and change his life. For example, ask yourself frequently, 'What is the most useful question to ask now?

A man who has control over his mind is able to realize its full potential. —The Sama Veda

When we believe something, we act as if it is true.

Why' questions have little value, at best they get justifications or long explanations which do nothing to change the situation.

Once a response becomes a habit, you stop learning. Theoretically, you could act differently, but in practice you do not. Habits are extremely useful, they streamline the parts of our lives we do not want to think about...But there is an art to deciding what parts of your life you want to turn over to habit, and what parts of your life you want to continue to learn from and have choice about. This is a key question of balance.

Creative geniuses are: 1.  Comfortable with uncertainty 2.  Able to hold seeming opposites or paradoxes 3.  Persistent

Neuro-linguistic programming is to Neuroscience what Astrology is to Astronomy.

Free your expectation of the future from the grip of past failure.

True learning involves learning other ways of doing what you can do already.

As long as you believe it is impossible, you will actually never find out if it is possible or not.

No one can consistently get everything wrong. Such perfection does not exist.

Reframing is also the pivotal element in the creative process: it is the ability to put a commonplace event in a new frame that is useful or enjoyable.

Any single person's viewpoint will have blind spots caused by their habitual ways of perceiving the world, their perceptual filters...How can we shift our perceptions to get outside our own limited world view?

In my experience, the biggest challenge people face is learning to get out of their own way. When you can see just how easy change can be, you can begin to take control over your life and make all the changes you want—but you need to take the action.

Remember: the journey is the destination.

We perceive and remember people, things, and events based on aspects of the experience:

Thinking isn’t a passive process unless you do it passively. Thinking should always be an active process where you think in a way that gets you the results you want.

What happens to our thoughts as we clothe them in language, and how faithfully are they preserved when our listeners undress them?

Without action, a goal is just an idea.

Masha is a professional, qualified counselor and psychotherapist. Her techniques include cognitive behavioral therapy, neuro-linguistic program and hypnotherapy. Her background also includes teaching senior executives and makes them understand how to manage a major emergency.

We all have beliefs and expectations from our personal experience; it is impossible to live without them. Since we have to make some assumptions, they might as well be ones that allow us freedom, choice and fun in the world, rather than ones that limit us. You often get what you expect to get.

Humans aren’t born conscious. They become conscious. Consciousness is acquired via language. Consciousness is the adaptive modification to the nervous system that results from the application of language to it. Never forget, consciousness = neuro-linguistic programming. It concerns how we program our nervous system via learned language.

When you persuade yourself that you “get to” do something rather than “have to,” you can find a silver lining. For instance, saying “I have to clean the house” implies cleaning is an unpleasant task. On the other hand, saying “I get to clean the house” reframes the labor as something you look forward to, emphasizing how important it is to have a place to live in the first place. A great strategy to change your perspective and enhance your mental health is to reframe the tasks you encounter in daily life with a positive outlook.

It’s not that fear is a bad thing. Fear moves you away from things; you shouldn’t touch hot fire. Even when children are young, they are born with only two natural fears: a fear of loud noises and a fear of falling. That’s why when children start to do something that’s dangerous, we yell at them. And that fear then translates so that, instead of having to stick your hand in fire, you feel fear as you reach toward it. This teaches us, and we generalize one fear to another till we learn “don’t cross the street until you know it’s safe to do so.

Words are anchors for sense experience, but the experience is not the reality, and the word is not the experience. Language is thus two removes from reality. To argue about the real meaning of a word is rather like arguing that one menu tastes better than another because you prefer the food that is printed on it...To come to believe that the external world is patterned by the way we talk about it is even worse than eating the menu - it is eating the printing ink on the menu. Words can be combined and manipulated in ways that have nothing to do with sensory experience.

The Encyclopedia of Systemic NLP (2000) and NLP II: The Next Generation (2010).

This background also provided the foundation and inspiration for the remarkable recovery of my mother from metastatic breast cancer in 1982 and was the basis for my book Beliefs: Pathways to Health and Well-Being.17

Bandler and Grinder’s work with Virginia Satir and their exploration of parts also led to the principle of positive intention. Simply put, the principle states that at some level all behavior is (or at one time was) “positively intended.” Another way to say it is that all behavior serves (or at one time served) a “positive purpose” – i.e., every “neuro-linguistic program” emerges and lasts because it serves some type of adaptive function. While I liked the principle, at first it seemed mostly like a nice philosophical idea. Like everything else in NLP, however, it eventually became a very personal experience that changed my life. It did not come in a flash of blinding light as to St. Paul on the road to Damascus. It was subtler. But the moment that I deeply realized all of my behaviors had some type of positive intention, even if I did not immediately recognize what it was, something shifted inside of me that led to a deep trust in my own being; that somehow, as Einstein proposed, “the universe is a friendly place” at its core. Even today the principle of positive intention seems to me to be the most spiritual principle in NLP.

The first application was named Mind Master, which was followed by the NeuroLink and a commercial computer game called MindDrive. Today, these applications are available through Somatic Vision.

The greeting of risk, the willingness to discover through (certain classes of non-lethal) trial and error, the subordination of success to exploration and discovery, and the insistence of finding the edge of patterns; where they fail, all of these seem to contain echoes of field work in Special Forces and related intelligence organizations, the passion for languages, the recognition that much of what passes for effective communication can be achieved with very little actual understanding, the primacy of non-verbal communication in influencing face-to-face communications, a tolerance for ambiguity and vagueness, and a fascination with the unknown.

Bob Dylan sang, “He not busy being born is busy dying.

Grinder’s Whispering in the Wind.

After four years of corporate experience I completed the first draft of Making the Message Clear (which I believe was the first book on the application of NLP to business).

We created and published with Bill the Neurolinguistic Communication Profile and Rapport: Matching and Mirroring Communication.

Rapport-Based Selling and No Need for Conflict!

So, what every parent would want their college kids to know: Look for patterns, they are always there. Challenge all my assumptions. Change, Jim, can be good. Use all my senses, even the ones I am not aware of. Understand the world from another’s perspective, not mine. Listen more, talk less; if I do talk, ask questions. Everyone is doing the best job they can given the limitations of their beliefs. My job is to get people to use the best of themselves to get better, to improve. Everyone has a chance; if something didn’t work, it’s because of my limitations, not the other person’s. I am ultimately accountable for and own the outcomes of my choices. All of them.

Since the early days, some of the originators of NLP have developed new models including Design Human Engineering, the New NLP, and NLP New Code.

which Frank and I later refined and published as the book, Magic Demystified: A Pragmatic Guide to Communication and Change.4

Sobriety Demystified: Getting Clean and Sober with NLP and CBT, which was published in 1996. In keeping

Virginia joined John and Richard at the house to model her work with family systems and the three of them collaborated to write the book, Changing with Families.

remain, however, a firm believer in the value of the fundamentals. It is difficult to master the really slick stuff without core tools like the Meta Model, accessing cues, calibrations, anchoring, sub-modalities, and an understanding of how and why these are important

Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) and working with the subconscious mind. NLP is a different approach to mental mastery. It is the scientific impact that language has on the subconscious mind. An array of modalities and language patterns are implemented to bypass the loud, chattery, brain bullshit, which gets in the way of resourceful thinking. It also takes the traumas we have stored in our subconscious, from years of repetitive thinking and behaviors, and makes us consciously aware of them, so we can implement the tools and experience positive and lasting change at a brain and cellular level.

In fact, some research studies have proved that people with brain damage resulting in not being able to experience emotions fully have reduced capacity to make good decisions. Even

Also in the 1970s, Duke University's Psychology Department compiled a list of words which, in a neuro-linguistic sense, are "power words." These words get the most of your attention; they light up neurons in the brain. They are: Easy, Health, Save, Guarantee, Money, Discovery, Results, New, Love, Free, Proven, You.

There is no such thing as failure, only feedback. We are always producing a result; if it’s not what we want, we can use the unwanted result as feedback to guide us in experimenting with other choices.

As you change yourself, you’ll notice how—without a word—people around you shift in response. This phenomenon is fascinating and is likely to inspire you to make more changes!

If what you are doing isn’t working, try anything else. If we keep experimenting, we aren’t guaranteed success, but we can sure stack the odds. The only way to fail is to quit trying!

When you truly know what you want, and that what you want is worth having, you’ll find all your internal resources aligning.

You see, the funny thing was that when I changed, the people around me changed, too.

The most effective way to turbocharge your life is to learn to move in harmony with your values.

The quality of our lives is determined by the quality of our communications. How we communicate with ourselves creates our personal experience and how we communicate with others determines the way we are treated throughout our lives.

A man who has control over his mind is able to realize its full potential.

The brain is the largest data store facility to ever exist, even exceeding the storage capacity of a man's testicles (yes, if you are a man you can be proud of your pair, as they store more data than any computer). The

Uczymy się […] 10% tego, co czytamy, 20% tego, co słyszymy, 30% tego, co widzimy, 50% tego, co widzimy i słyszymy, 70% tego, o czym rozmawiamy, 80% tego, co doświadczamy, 95% tego, czego uczymy innych. — William Glasser

Czyn ludzki raz dokonany płynie przez wieczność do wielkiego rachunku. Nasza nieśmiertelność przejawia się w tym, co robimy, a nie w tym, kim jesteśmy. — George Meredith

Po ciężkim dniu treningu można zjeść grzechotnika. — Elvis Presley

Teoretycznie nie ma różnicy między teorią a praktyką, lecz praktycznie owa różnica istnieje. — Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut

Na tym polega uczenie się. Nagle rozumie się coś, co rozumiało się przez całe życie — ale w zupełnie nowy sposób. — Doris Lessing

Trudności to wymówki, których historia nie przyjmuje nigdy. — Edward R. Murrow

Osobiście uważam, że ludzie wymyślili język z powodu naszej głębokiej, wewnętrznej potrzeby narzekania. — Jane Wagner

Dwie podstawowe zasady życiowe brzmią: 1) Zmiany są nieuchronne. 2) Każdy opiera się zmianom. Jedynym człowiekiem lubiącym zmiany jest dziecko, które ma mokro. — Roy Blitzer

Większość z nas przechodzi przez życie, nie decydując się na opanowanie czegokolwiek do perfekcji. Jestem przekonany, że niepowodzenia większości ludzi spowodowane są tym, iż zbyt wielką wagę przykładają do rzeczy błahych. — Anthony Robbins, autor Obudź w sobie olbrzyma

Nigdy nie pozwól, aby szkoła przeszkodziła w twojej edukacji. — Mark Twain

Uważaj, czytając książki poświęcone zdrowiu — żebyś nie umarł z powodu literówki. — Mark Twain

Ważne jest, aby nie rezygnować z zadawania pytań. Ciekawość nie istnieje bez przyczyny. Człowiek może tylko czuć respekt, kiedy podziwia tajemnicę wieczności, życia, wspaniałej struktury rzeczywistości. Wystarczy więc, kiedy będzie próbował zrozumieć zaledwie odrobinę tej tajemnicy każdego dnia. Nie wolno nigdy tracić świętej ciekawości. — Albert Einstein

Jest bardzo ważne, abyśmy definiowali samych siebie nie tylko w kategoriach, kim jesteśmy, lecz również i kim nie jesteśmy. — Anthony Robbins, Obudź w sobie olbrzyma

Pamięć stanowi sposób na zatrzymanie tego, co kochasz, tego, kim jesteś, tego, czego nie chcesz nigdy stracić. — Kevin Arnold

Nie wyrządzam sobie krzywdy, a jednak jestem własnym katem. — John Donne

W nic nie wierzą ludzie tak niezłomnie jak w to, o czym najmniej wiedzą. — Michel de Montaigne

Żadna liczba doświadczeń nie udowodni nigdy, że mam rację; pojedynczy eksperyment może udowodnić, że się mylę. — Albert Einstein

Cokolwiek robisz, potrzebujesz odwagi. Jakikolwiek kierunek działania wybierasz, zawsze znajduje się ktoś, kto ci mówi, że się mylisz. Pojawiają się trudności, które cię skłaniają, abyś uwierzył, że twoi krytycy mają rację. Aby wyznaczyć kierunek działania oraz podążać wybraną drogą do samego końca, potrzebujesz odwagi żołnierza. Pokój odnosi zwycięstwa, ale wywalczać je muszą odważni mężczyźni i kobiety. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

Jesteśmy wszystkim tym, czym udajemy, że jesteśmy. Uważajmy więc bardzo, co udajemy. — Kurt Vonnegut

Żyj tak, jakbyś miał umrzeć jutro. Ucz się tak, jakbyś miał żyć wiecznie. — Mahatma Gandhi

Jeżeli potrafisz zmienić zdanie, potrafisz zmienić życie. Przekonania kreują rzeczywiste fakty […]. Największa rewolucja za życia mojego pokolenia wiąże się z odkryciem, że poszczególni ludzie, w drodze zmiany wewnętrznych postaw i przekonań, mogą zmienić zewnętrzne aspekty swego życia. — William James

Każdy pragnie zostać milionerem lub nawet multimilionerem. Otwartą kwestią pozostaje jedynie dylemat, czy jesteś gotów do zrobienia wszystkiego oraz do poświęcenia wszystkich lat, niezbędnych do osiągnięcia finansowego sukcesu. Jeśli tak, to naprawdę nie istnieje nic, co mogłoby cię zatrzymać na tej drodze. — Brian Tracy, Sposób na sukces

Filozofia, jaką wyznajesz, determinuje, czy się zdyscyplinujesz, czy też będziesz nadal popełniał błędy. — Jim Rohn

Jeżeli trafiasz w cel za każdym razem, to znaczy, że albo jest on za duży, albo znajduje się zbyt blisko. — Tom Hirshfield

Jak się zjada słonia? Po kawałku.

Gdybyśmy faktycznie zrobili wszystko to, co jesteśmy w stanie zrobić, szczerze zadziwilibyśmy samych siebie. — Thomas Edison

Najlepsze w przyszłości jest to, że nadchodzi po jednym dniu na raz. — Abraham Lincoln

Ludzie nie przyciągają tego, czego chcą, ale to, czym są. — James Allen

Człowiek uczy się dwojako: albo poprzez czytanie, albo poprzez kontakty z mądrzejszymi ludźmi. — Will Rogers

Mirroring is a powerful neuro-linguistic programming technique that can be used to bond with others, build rapport, and reach mutual understanding more quickly. You may already be using it instinctively without even being aware.

Mirroring is simply the process of discreetly matching and mirroring the subtle behaviors and qualities of the person with whom you are connecting. It's a form of behavioral reflection that unconsciously reveals, "We're more alike than we are different.

Mirroring is especially helpful when our differences may divide. Think of the times when you have made a diligent effort to speak in another person’s native language to communicate and connect with comfort. By doing this, you are extending a considerate courtesy to meet them where they are, thus removing barriers and improving engagement.

Coordinating your gestures with someone’s subtle behaviors, can help you gain understanding, realize comfortable compatibility, and develop mutual trust.

Why Does Mirroring Work? Scientific research suggests ‘mirroring’ techniques works because of the mirror-neurons which are fired in our brains when we both perceive and take action. When we observe someone doing something, we may feel as if we are having the same experience.

When you see someone smile, does it naturally make you want to smile back? When you are irritable, do you find that people mirror your irritability? When someone yawns around you, do automatically do the same? When you hear someone celebrating, do you feel inclined to join in and celebrate too? Your responses are not forced, but instinctual and empathetic.

Mirroring provides social cues through body language and behavior which enable us to develop more empathy and understanding for others.

Who are we the most comfortable with? People who are the most like us! The “Similarity-Attraction Hypothesis” (Newcomb, 1956) found that similar (real or perceived) personalities are a major determinant of our likability and friendship choices. It is simply human to gravitate toward people like us. This tribal inclination runs the gamut across demographics of age, ethnicity, culture, education, religion, and even personality style. Mirroring will enable you to find ways to create the comfort of familiarity through similarity.

Since we know people like to do business with people who are most like themselves, consider this: Excellent sales people understand that "matching and mirroring" another person’s body language is a powerful technique and subliminal way to develop trust, build rapport, and make their clients more comfortable and engaging. Subtly mirroring the postures, gestures, and body language of your client inspires a kinship of commonality.

Early in my sales career, various sales trainers taught our teams how to use matching and mirroring to build rapport and earn trust with our clients. When done well, it would inevitably help us improve customer service and closing ratios. It was not encouraged as a deceptive sales practice to manipulate, but rather a subtle way to make a great first impression and connect on a meaningful level.

By mirroring, speaking, and moving in tandem with my clients, I provided them with a sense of familiar comfort and ease which helped us work well together. When they leaned forward, I would lean forward. When they crossed their arms, I would cross my arms. When they began speaking slowly and quietly, I would do the same. These subtle actions help to us to communicate more effectively.

Becoming aware of what you are doing and how others perceive you will provide you with instant insight for making changes where necessary.