Miranda Hobbes Quotes

I’ve never understood sexy lingerie. I mean, what’s the point? The guy’s only going to take it off.

Have I become the girl who waits by the phone, hoping it will ring, who asks a friend to dial her number to make sure the phone is working?

Don’t you think it’s weird when someone has photographs of themselves all over the place? It’s like they’re trying to prove they exist.

Maybe you can’t have it both ways. His life and your life. How do you put two lives together, anyway?

I’m a realist. Just because you had sex once doesn’t mean you have to fall in love.

Sex. It’s the biggest sham of all. I mean, your whole life, all you ever hear is how you’re supposed to save yourself for marriage. And how it’s so special. And then you finally do it. And you’re like, that’s it? This is what everyone’s been raving about?

Why do magazines do this to women?” Miranda complains now, glaring at Vogue. “It’s all about creating insecurity. Trying to make women feel like they’re not good enough. And when women don’t feel like they’re good enough, guess what?” “What?” I ask, picking up the grocery bag. “Men win. That’s how they keep us down,” she concludes. “Except the problem with women’s magazines is that they’re written by women,” I point out. “That only shows you how deep this thing goes. Men have made women coconspirators in their own oppression. I mean, if you spend all your time worrying about leg hair, how can you possibly have time to take over the world?

We hate guys who date more than one woman at a time. I’ve always believed that what’s unacceptable in one sex should, by definition, be unacceptable in the other.

My share. I hate owing anyone anything. Don’t you?

Yow. Guys can be so insecure.

Thinking you don’t have unhealthy patterns is an unhealthy pattern in itself. And everyone has something unhealthy from their childhood. If you don’t deal with it, it can ruin your life.

Only the “˜intercourse’ part.” Miranda makes quotation marks with her fingers. “Why do they call it intercourse anyway? It makes it sound like it’s some kind of conversation. Which it isn’t. It’s penetration, pure and simple. There’s no give-and-take involved.” “It’s an act of war,” Miranda objects, getting heated. “The penis is saying, “˜Let me in,’ and the vagina is saying, “˜Get the hell away from me, creep.

I really liked it.” She covers her mouth in horror. “If I like sex, do you think it means I can’t be a feminist?” “No.” I shake my head. “Because being a feminist -- I think it means being in charge of your sexuality. You decide who you want to have sex with. It means not trading your sexuality for… other things.” “Like marrying some gross guy who you’re not in love with just so you can have a nice house with a picket fence.” “Or marrying a rich old geezer. Or a guy who expects you to cook him dinner every night and take care of the children,” I say, thinking of Samantha. “Or a guy who makes you have sex with him whenever he wants, even if you don’t,” Miranda concludes. We look at each other in triumph, as if we’ve finally solved one of the world’s great problems.

Babies! That’s all it’s about. Who ever knew the world would be all about babies?” Samantha shouts. “Every time I see a baby, I swear, I want to throw up,” Miranda says. “I did throw up once.” I nod eagerly. “I saw a filthy bib, and that was it.” “Why don’t these people just get cats and a litter box?” Samantha asks.

He’s probably one of those “love the one you’re with” guys -- meaning he automatically goes after whatever woman happens to be around when he’s feeling horny." "Just another reason why I’ll never get married," I say, getting out of the car. “Oh, Carrie.” He sighs. “I feel sorry for you, then. I worry that you’ll never find true love.

I've become a handmaiden to other people’s relationships. Aiding and abetting. And now I’m al alone. Thank God for Miranda. I’ll always have her. Miranda will never have a relationship. So where the hell is she? “Having sex,” she repeats. She slides onto the cushion. “I met a guy and we’ve been having nonstop sex for the last two days. And the worst thing about it? I couldn’t poop. I honestly could not poop until he finally left this morning.” “He’s not the best-looking guy. But I told myself that looks aren’t everything. And he really is smart. Which can be a turn-on. I’ve always said I’d rather be with a smart, ugly guy than a goodlooking dumb guy. Because what are you going to talk about with a dumb guy?” “So then,” Miranda continues, “we’re walking through the Mews -- that cute little cobblestoned street -- and suddenly he pushes me up against the wall and starts making out with me!” “I hardly know him,” she giggles, “but so what? If it’s right, it’s right, don’t you think?

What?” She gasps. “Who did you do it with? You can’t go out there and pick up some random stranger. Oh no, Carrie. You didn’t. You didn’t pick up some guy at a bar.