Larry The Cable Guy Quotes

We've searched our database for all the quotes and captions related to Larry The Cable Guy. Here they are! All 13 of them:

You can't fix stupid.
Larry the Cable Guy
Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.
Larry the Cable Guy
guns don't kill people, husbands that come home early do
Larry the Cable Guy
Git-R-Done
Larry the Cable Guy (Git - R - Done)
I believe that Britney Spears should be one of Baskin-Robbins 31 flavors..... 2 scoops
Larry the Cable Guy
If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off
Larry the Cable Guy
If John Grisham, Harper Lee, and Larry the Cable Guy were penned up in a remote cabin for a weekend with nothing but good bourbon, fine wine, and a couple of cases of Pabst Blue Ribbon beer, something like Common Pleas (A Tale of Whoa!) might result...
J. Randolph Cresenzo (COMMON PLEAS (A Tale of Whoa!))
Git 'er done!
Larry the Cable Guy
I used to be a chick magnet. Now, I'm just a refrigerator magnet.
Larry the Cable Guy
I told him it would be a week, seven to ten days to get a new line. He said through his teeth he needed an exact day. I gave him my supervisor's number. This whole time, his wife was in the kitchen wiping a clean counter. I was filling out the work orders and emailing my supervisor to give him a heads-up on a possible call from a member of every cable tech's favorite rage cult when his wife knocked on my van window. She stepped back and called me "ma'am." Which was nice. Her husband with the tucked-in polo shirt had asked my name and I told him Lauren. He heard Lawrence because it fit what he saw and asked if he could call me Larry. Guys like that use your name as a weapon. "Larry, explain to me why I had to sit around here from one to three waiting on you and you show up at 3:17. Does that seem like good customer service to you, Larry? And now you're telling me seven to ten days? Larry, I'm getting really tired of hearing this shit." Guys like that, it was safer to just let them think I was a man. She said she was sorry about him. I said, "It's fine." I said there really wasn't anything I could do. She blinked back the flood of tears she'd been holding since god knows when. She said, "It's just, when he has Fox, he has Obama to hate. If he doesn't have that . . . " She kept looking over her shoulder. She was terrified of him. "I'm sorry," she said. "I just need him to have Fox." I got out of my van.
Lauren Hough (Leaving Isn't the Hardest Thing)
This weekend on The History Channel, someone digs through old plastic junk (“It’s a Dukes of Hazzard wastebasket!”), someone else tries to sell a doll head (“I used to take the heads off the bodies, and I kept the heads”) . . . and Larry the Cable Guy taste-tests Tabasco sauce (“I can’t feel my dadgum tongue!”). The History Channel. What the hell happened to us? Jimmy Kimmel Live4
Donald R. Prothero (Reality Check: How Science Deniers Threaten Our Future)
To quote Larry the Cable Guy, that’s funny right there. I don’t care who you are.
Jackie Walker (Love & Other Lies (Love and Laughs, #3))
Would Nancy Silberkleit be OK with a film version where a Nazi skinhead plays the role of Moses? Would Alex Alonso be just bueno if Larry the Cable Guy were to portray Che Guevara in a cable-TV movie? Of course they wouldn’t. They don’t think it’s “progressive” for anyone to mess with their cultural icons. What they’re doing goes far beyond mere “cultural appropriation.” This is cultural pillaging.
Jim Goad (Whiteness: The Original Sin)