Kitsune Quotes

I did, however, manage to do it without hurting those dogs. Very considerate of me. Don't let it be said I'm not an animal lover-that wretched kitsune aside.

we missed you at the wedding," he said. "Yeah." puck shrugged. "I was in Kyoto at the time, visiting some old kitsune friends. We were travelling up to Hokaido to check out this old temple that was supposedly haunted. Turns out, a yuki-onna had taken up residence there and had scared off most of the locals. She wasn't terribly happy to see us. Can you believe it?" He grinned. "Course, we, uh, might've pissed her off when the temple caught fire-you know how kitsune are. She chased us all the way to the coast, throwing icicles, causing blizzards...the old hag even tried to bury us under an avalanche. We almost died." He sighed dreamily and looked at Ash. "You should've been there ice-boy.

Captain's Log... ...Four days have passed with no sign of human life on this island. Hunger is about to push me to the point of... ...Eating pocket lint. It looks edible.

Selethen was names Hawk. Alyss had been given the title of Tsuru, or Crane. . .Evanlynn was Kitsune, the Nihon-Jan word for Fox . . .Halt strangly enough had been known only as Halto-san. . . But Will had been taken aback in his confrotation with Arisaka to discover that his name - Chocho - meant "butterfly". It seemed a highly unwarlike name to him- not at all glamorous.And he was puzzled to know why they had selected it. His friends,of course, were delighted in helping him guess the reason. "I assume its because you're such a snazzy dresser," Evanlynn said. "You Rangers are like a riot of color after all." Will glared at her and was mortified to hear Alyss snigger at the princess's sally. He'd thought Alyss, at least, might stick up for him. "I think it might be more to do with the way he raced around the the training ground, darting here and there to correct the way a man might be holding his sheidl then dashing off to show someone how to put theri body weight into their javelin cast," said Horace, a little more sympathetically. Then he ruined the effect by adding thoughtlessly, "I must say, your cloak did flutter around like a butterfly's wings." "It was neither of those things," Halt said finally, and they all turned to look at him. "I asked Shigeru," he explained. "He said that they had all noticed how Will's mind and imagination darts from one idea to another at such high speed," . . Will looked mollified. "Isuppose it's not too bad it you put it that way. It's just it does seem a bit . . girly." .... " I like my name Horace said a little smugly. "Black Bear. It describes my prodigous strength and my mighty prowess in battle." Alyss might have let him get away with it if it hadn't been for his tactless remark about Will's cloak flapping like a butterfly's wings. "Not quite," she said. "I asked Mikeru where the name came from. He said it described your prdogious appetite and your mighty prowess at the dinner table. It seems that when you were escaping through the mountains, Shigeru and his followers were worried you'd eat the supplies all by yourself." There was a general round of laughter. After a few seconds, Horace joined in.

And you think that's it? All is forgiven and he'll just be cool with me having Storm King's grandchildren because we're all united in some super team? That's naive." Dorian's face suddenly hardened. "Equally naive is the thought that I would carelessly allow him to do anything to you or your children. How many times do I have to convince you of my protection? Do you really think that if he comes back here and attempts to harm one hair on your head, I'll allow it? Eugenie, if he so much as looks at you in a way I don't like, Rurik and his conspirators over there won't have a chance to act because I'll have long since run that bastard kitsune through myself." Dorian's tone astonishingly became light and easy again. "Now then. I wonder where we'll be making camp tonight.

Trust is an illusion meant to wrap one in a false sense of belief, in that moment of realization will despair ultimately set in.

Considering most everyone on the ground wants my kind dead, this is probably not the smartest thing I’ve ever done. Though, neither was entering a compound of Fae-Hating-Crazies when you’re a Kitsune.

With how you were reacting to that glamour, I'll have to keep an eye on you. Otherwise the next time I see you, you'll probably have a Doctor Who tramp stamp. For one awkward second, I realized that the only way Suzume could possibly look hotter to me was if she had a tattoo of the TARDIS on the middle of her lower back. I was profoundly grateful in that moment that the kitsune were unable to read minds.

There are a number of good books that draw upon fox legends -- foremost among them, Kij Johnson's exquisite novel The Fox Woman. I also recommend Neil Gaiman's The Dream Hunters (with the Japanese artist Yoshitaka Amano);  Larissa Lai's unusual novel, When Fox Is a Thousand; Helen Oyeyemi's recent novel, Mr. Fox; and Ellen Steiber's gorgeous urban fantasy novel, A Rumor of Gems, as well as her heart-breaking novella "The Fox Wife" (published in Ruby Slippers, Golden Tears). For younger readers, try the "Legend of Little Fur" series by Isobelle Carmody.  You can also support a fine mythic writer by subscribing to Sylvia Linsteadt's The Gray Fox Epistles: Wild Tales By Mail.  For the fox in myth, legend, and lore, try: Fox by Martin Wallen; Reynard the Fox, edited by Kenneth Varty; Kitsune: Japan's Fox of Mystery, Romance, and Humour by Kiyoshi Nozaki;Alien Kind: Foxes and Late Imperial Chinese Narrative by Raina Huntington; The Discourse on Foxes and Ghosts: Ji Yun and Eighteenth-Century Literati Storytelling by Leo Tak-hung Chan; and The Fox and the Jewel: Shared and Private Meanings in Contemporary Japanese Inari Worship, by Karen Smythers.

My name is Lilian Pnév̱ma, but you may call me Lilly, or anything else you would prefer. However, I would be particularly pleased if you called me You Sexy Thing You.

Are you on birth control, Kitsune?” Damian growls as he bends over me and tugs my head up by the braid wrapped around his fist. My nipples are tight and electric against the cushioned bench beneath me, my knees shaking, my back sharply arched as his dick teases against my lips. “N-no...” I choke out. “I⁠—” “Good.

Never say you understand someone's pain if you haven't felt the same, because not only would you sound mocking but also ignorant.

Kitsune sonreía a menudo, y sonreía como sonríen los Soles. Con alegría. Y también lloraba, y cuando lloraba, lloraba como lloran las nubes. Con tristeza.

There’s a good, obedient Kitsune,” he growls. “Such a pretty little cocksucker I’ve found.

When I come, Kitsune,” he murmurs darkly, “you’re going to be a good girl and swallow every drop.

They do that in Japan, you know. Rather a lot." "Poems to foxes?" "Perhaps, but I mean they're always tying white paper on strings around trees- it looks as though the trees have necklaces or garter belts. Are you sure your witch friend wasn't Japanese? Their spirit world is full of foxes. They are called kitsune, and some are divine and some are mischievous or wicked.

Considering most everyone on the ground wants my kind dead, this is probably not the smartest thing I’ve ever done. Though, neither was entering a compound of Fae-Hating-Crazies when you’re a Kitsune.

Yes. Your plan is sound. I will go first.” Moria stood at his back, dagger raised. Gavril pushed the door. It did not budge. He eyed it and seemed ready to bash his shoulder into it when she whispered, “You cannot fight with a dislocated sword arm, Kitsune. Kick it.” He hesitated. “If you fall on your arse, I’ll not laugh.” She paused. “Or not loudly.

Happiness is not perfection. In fact, most days I think perfection just gets in the way. It’s more about perception.

He was doing his academic rambling thing again. "You'll let me run some calculations on you, Lady Manami, won't you?" "Will they hurt?" "Well, there are some who find the mere presence of advanced mathematical equations painful, but I don't think that you'll be materially damaged in any physical manner. Oh! Can I ask how the relative densities affect buoyancy? I mean to say, do kitsune bob something fierce?

Are you babysitting?” I pulled out my phone. “Is this a bad time? I can call for a pick-up. I’m sure Kitty McLitterbox would love to come back for me.” “If you leave me,” she snarled, “I will hunt you down, chop you up and feed you to Grandmother’s koi.” I believed her. “Are all kitsunes this violent, or are you the exception?” She glanced toward the house. “You’ve met my mother and grandmother.” “Good point.

Out of anyone, Ashe was more aware of the rules in place in the hidden world. As a half-demon, Ashe knew how harsh the hidden world could be towards beings the WWC considered ‘inferior’. The bigotry and ignorance perpetuated by the hidden world’s institutions against half-demons was partly the reason Clover had chosen to become a lawyer and defend those weaker than her. She wanted to be there for Ashe, to protect him from a world which wanted nothing more than to classify him as dangerous and ban him from using craft or being a part of the hidden world. The WWC prided itself as being a righteous institution, yet it disrespected any being that wasn’t entirely a witch. It had only begun accepting witches and wizards born to human ancestry about two centuries prior, but it still had miles to go before being entirely open to half breeds like kitsunes and other sentient demons. Ashe knew the rules and their cost. Yet, he didn’t hesitate to break them.

They caught the sound of footfalls at the same moment, and both stood as a tall figure ran toward them, his blade in hand. “Stop there, traitor,” Sabre said, raising her sling. “Or I’ll fell you before you take another step.” “The advantage of a missile weapon,” Moria said. “Exactly. And it appears he has enough experience with yours to respect mine.” “No, he’ll only pretend he’s listening, as he talks and distracts, and then creeps close enough to use his sword.” “I can hear you,” Gavril called. “Good,” Moria said. “Then you can hear that I’m not under any duress, and you can presume that if our visitor was helping me escape, we’d be gone by now, not chatting like girls at a tea ceremony. Since I know you’ll not stay where you are, you may approach half the distance, then lay down your sword and come closer.” “May I?” “Only if you behave. And keep quiet. Otherwise, stay where you are.” “I think you forget who is—” “—in charge here? No, Kitsune, I do not. I am in charge, because if you do not return with me, you will pay the price. That is why you’ve accommodated me so far and it’s why you’ll continue to do so now.” Sabre chuckled. Gavril stalked closer.

Even I know that there are some places a man just isn’t meant to go, and that chick with the katana is one of them. Like the no-man’s land found in the center of the battlefield, the katana babe’s tittielicious body is a place no man can get close to without suffering a horrible death. I’ve seen it! One cannot grasp those heavenly mountains unless they want to get dumped in a ditch and watch helplessly as their life bleeds out of their broken bodies.” “Wasn’t that the threat she used on him?” Andrew whispered to his brother. “It was indeed.” “Perverts beware! You’re in for a scare!” “Dang it, Eric! Get down from there!

The village square teemed with life, swirling with vibrant colors and boisterous chatter. The entire village had gathered, celebrating the return of their ancestral spirit. Laughter and music filled the air, carrying with it an energy that made Kitsune smile. Paper lanterns of all colors floated lazily above, their delicate glow reflecting on the smiling faces below. Cherry blossoms caught in the playful breeze, their sweet, earthy scent settling over the scene. At the center, villagers danced with unbridled joy, the rhythm of the taiko drums and the melody of flutes guiding their steps. To the side, a large table groaned under the weight of a feast. Sticky rice balls, steamed dumplings, seaweed soup, sushi, and more filled the air with a mouthwatering aroma. As she approached the table, she was greeted warmly by the villagers, who offered her food, their smiles genuine and welcoming. She filled a plate and sat at a table with Goro and Sota, overlooking the celebration. The event brought back a flood of memories of a similar celebration from her childhood—a time when everything was much simpler and she could easily answer the question who are you? The memory filled her heart with a sweet sadness, a reminder of what she lost and what had carved the road to where she was now. Her gaze fell on the dancing villagers, but she wasn’t watching them. Not really. Her attention was fully embedded in her heart ache, longing for the past, for the life that was so cruelly ripped away from her. “I think... I think I might know how to answer your question,” she finally said, her voice soft and steady, barely audible over the cacophony of festivity around them. “Oh?” Goro responded, his face alight with intrigue. “I would have to tell you my story.” Kitsune’s eyes reflected the somber clouds of her past. Goro swallowed his bite of food before nodding. “Let us retire to the dojo, and you can tell me.” They retreated from the bustling square, leaving behind the chaos of the celebration. The sounds of laughter and chatter and drums carried away by distance. The dojo, with its bamboo and sturdy jungle planks, was bathed in the soft luminescence of the moonlight, the surface of its wooden architecture glistening faintly under the glow. They stepped into the silent tranquility of the building, and Kitsune made her way to the center, the smooth, cool touch of the polished wooden floor beneath her providing a sense of peace. Assuming the lotus position, she calmed herself, ready to speak of memories she hadn’t confronted in a long time. Not in any meaningful way at least. Across from her, Goro settled, his gaze intense yet patient, encouraging her with a gentle smile like he somehow already understood her story was hard to verbalize.

So…” Lindsay started again, “… are we still on for spring break?” Jumping off her seat, Lilian stood on the table, left foot on the bench, right on the table itself. She raised a hand to her face, clenching it into a fist, eyes blazing with an inner fire. “Of course we are!” she declared, wearing a large, excited smile. “There’s no way we’re going to alter our plans now! This is my first spring break, and by Inari, we are going to travel out of this state and have fun!” A grinning Kevin followed his girlfriend-slash-mate’s example. He, too, jumped onto the table, imitating Lilian’s pose. An excited gleam had entered his eyes. “That’s right! This is something we must do! It’s going to be the adventure of a lifetime! There’s no way we can pass up on this opportunity!” Everyone stared at the two with the kind of “WTF?” expression that had become commonplace among them.

Kevin chuckled and walked over to his bike. He put up the kickstand and grabbed the handles. It was time to head home. “Nya.” Blink. “Nya?” “Nya.” Blink. Blink. Kevin looked at the wall near the distribution building—and nearly squealed upon spotting the small, cute, adorably furry animal sitting on its haunches. A black cat with big yellow eyes stared at him. Its tail swayed behind it, moving left, then right. It opened its mouth, releasing another one of those utterly endearing, if unusual, “nya” sounds. This cat reminds me of the one that I took home with me when I was in elementary school. It even nyas. How cool is that? “Kitty!” Like a child who’d just seen a new toy on Christmas Day, Kevin dropped his bike and went over to the cat, whose large incandescent orbs had yet to leave his face. He reached the feline in record time, and his hand was quick to descend upon its head. The cat didn’t seem to mind. Indeed, it reveled in the attention, purring as he gently scratched behind its left ear, which twitched with minute movements.

As Kevin pampered the cat, he realized that he needed to return home. Slowly, and with great reluctance, Kevin stopped petting the cat, which “nya’d” in complaint and tried to get his attention again. “Nya?” “I’m sorry.” Kevin struggled not to be blinded by the cuteness as he looked into the cat’s eyes. “But I really need to go.” “Nya?” “D-don’t look at me like that. I have… I need to leave. We’re planning a trip, so…” “Nya?” “Those eyes won’t… they won’t work on me. I’ve already been subject to them once. I won’t succumb again.” The cat tilted its head. Kevin squealed like a little girl who’d just been touched by her favorite pop idol. “Kya! So adorable!” He scooped the cat into his arms. The cat didn’t seem to mind. “I’m sure it’ll be fine if I take you home with me.” “Nya,” the cat mewled, seemingly in agreement.

There you are.” “Nya.” The cat mewled as he lifted her up and carried her to the dining room, where he set her down on the floor. He fetched a bowl and set it on the tile, then poured some milk into it. “I hope you like milk.” “Nya!” Kevin wasn’t sure, but he could’ve sworn he saw stars appear in the thing’s big yellow eyes. He shook his head. Must be my imagination.

Holy shit!” Those were the first words Eric spoke after entering the bus. “That’s what she said.

Kevin looked up from the manga he’d been reading, a story about a female ninja who wanted to become the leader of her village

Because when a facepalm didn’t cut it, a faceplant got the job done.

Lilian?” Kevin placed a hand on Lilian’s shoulder to try and rouse her from whatever spell she was under. “Lilian, are you—” He didn’t get a chance to finish. Mere seconds after he touched her, Lilian was blasted off her feet as her nose became a literal geyser. Crimson ichor sprayed from her nostrils like the eruption of Mount Saint Helens. He and Christine gawked as she flew backwards for several feet, crashed into the ground, rolled, and came to an abrupt stop. “Well,” Kevin began as a crowd of people drew around them to take snapshots of the scene, “that just happened.” Christine could do nothing but nod.

It seems like you’ve read all the ones here.” “I’m beginning to think I have.” “Too bad they don’t have any hentai.” Kevin twitched. “Why would I want to read a hentai?” “So you can gain some ideas for when you, myself, and my sister start screwing like vixens in heat.” I won’t facepalm. I won’t facepalm. I won’t facepalm. “Of course, if you wanted to, you could also add Mom, Kirihime, and Kotohime, though the latter two might kill you if you try to sex them up. Maybe we should just add Mom to our orgy, then. That would be hot.” The sound of Kevin’s palm smacking against his face echoed throughout the library.

Having been the most rambunctious of the group, Kevin and Lilian conked out first. Lilian had pulled a sleeping bag from her Extra Dimensional Storage Space, and she and Kevin had crawled into it and passed out. They lay on their side, the two of them. Lilian was snuggled against Kevin’s chest, and the blond human had an arm around her waist, pulling her close. The others had to admit, however reluctantly, that the pair made for an unbearably adorable sight. “Nya…” The cat didn’t seem to think so. It glared at the duo with something resembling irritation. “Brother?” “Yes?” “Is it weird that I have this strange urge to squeal ‘kawaii’?” Alex glanced at what his brother was looking at… then shook his head. “That… I cannot answer.” “Hmm.” Andrew pondered these words for a second. “What about wanting to wrap my hands around Kevin’s throat and squeeze until his eyeballs pop out of his head and his tongue swells and thickens as he slowly suffocates to death?” Alex took a moment to think up an answer. “… No, I think your feelings are perfectly acceptable, given the situation.” “Good.

Hold up, you two,” Kevin stopped Alex and Andrew before they could claim separate beds. “There are only four beds, and since you two are twins, you’re going to be sharing one of them.” “WHAT?!” The shout came from them both. “That’s not fair,” Alex whined. “Yeah, why do I have to sleep with this idiot?” “Don’t act like you’re the victim here. I’m the one who’s gonna be stuck dealing with your antics, you damn bed-hogger.” Blink. A vein throbbed on Andrew’s head. “A bed-hogger, am I? Well, who’s the one who’s always stealing the sheets? Huh! Huh?!” Blink. Blink. “At least I don’t still wet the bed!” Massive blinking. “You… you promised you’d never tell anyone that! And I haven’t wet the bed in, uh, well… a while! Besides! Who was the one who left his bed a sopping mess the other day?!” “Why you… that was a special moment! SPECIAL!” Kevin, Eric, and Justin watched as the two fraternal twin brothers tackled each other to the ground. They rolled around on the floor, pushing and pulling and biting and hitting and clawing. It was like watching two dogs trying to chase each other’s tails. “Ne, Kevin, do you know what those two are talking about?” asked Eric. “No.” Kevin shook his head. “No, I don’t.” A pause. “And I don’t think I want to know.” “… Hehehe…

A man strolled up to their table, dressed in the garb of a waiter. His blond hair was long and shiny, showing that he obviously took great care of it, probably more so than a man had any right to care for their hair. Light blue eyes were hidden beneath several strands of shimmering gold, and his pearly white teeth gleamed as he smiled. Kevin nearly groaned. Great. This was just what they needed. A bishie. “Good evening ma’am, madam… sir.” For reasons beyond Kevin, he felt like this man only added him at the last second as an afterthought. “Would either of you care for a refill?” he asked the two ladies at the table, though his eyes focused on Lilian. Kevin felt his blood boil. “No thanks. I’m good here.” Lilian dismissed the man without even looking at him. Vindication rushed through his veins when Kevin saw the pretty boy’s right eye twitch. He apparently wasn’t used to women ignoring him. “I see.” Kevin had to give the man credit. He kept his annoyance in check well. “And what about you, madam?” he addressed Kotohime. “Is the wine to your satisfaction?” He gave her his best smile. “It’s all right, I suppose.” Kotohime took a sip of the wine that he spoke of, managing to hide her grimace. “Though I do wish that you were in possession of some sake instead.” Another twitch. “I apologize that we could not accommodate you.” He bowed. “I have, of course, already suggested that we begin working towards importing sake, however, these things do take time. It will probably be at least a year before we see anything done.” “A shame,” Kotohime said, “I know that Kiara was most looking forward to trying some.” At the mention of Kiara, the man gripped the water pitcher in his hand hard enough that Kevin thought the handle would shatter. Did this man have a grudge against Kiara? He didn’t think so, but then, who could say for sure. For all Kevin knew, this man could have asked Kiara out on a date, thinking his bishounen good looks would make her swoon over him—and had then been disappointed when she told him that wimpy maggots who sparkled didn’t do it for her. Kevin could totally see that happening. “Yes, well, I am terribly sorry to disappoint a woman of her… esteemed position, but I am not in charge of imports, I’m afraid. I merely wait tables.” “Indeed.” “If you’ll excuse me.” “Hold it.” The man turned around. Kevin almost smiled when the man aimed an evil glare at him. He raised his glass. “I’d like a refill of water, please.” A twitch. “Of course, sir.” The man refilled his glass. Kevin leaned in. “If I ever see you stripping my girlfriend with your eyes again, I will rip your arms off and shove them so far up your ass that you’ll need to have surgery done if you ever want to use the restroom again,” he said, his tone and manner nonchalant. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” the man said, his smile fixed. “I am merely doing my job as your host.” “Yes.” Kevin snorted. “I’m sure you are.

that’s when Kevin arrived onto the scene. “I-would-call-this-dynamic-entry-but-cannot-for-fear-of-copyright-laws-kick!” His body spinning in midair, the young man lashed out at the woman with a kick from behind. She seemed to sense it, however, and managed to avoid getting her head rung like a bell. Her body smoothly rolled across the grassy ground, where she kipped back up to her feet. She turned around to face her newest attacker… and froze.

Kevin Swift woke up to a series of unusual sounds. The first, not to mention easiest, for him to identify was crying—no, not just crying. Sobbing. It was the sound of someone sobbing manly tears, though they did not sound sad. The second sound was, strangely enough, a word: kawaii. Just what the heck someone was doing speaking Japanese was beyond him. It was the third sound, however, that caused him to open his eyes—namely because it was right next to his ear. “Nya.” Cracking a single eye open, Kevin first saw nothing but red. It was hair. Lilian’s hair. A million strands of silk that tickled his nose. The familiar scent of strawberries and vanilla lulled his mind into a sense of contentment. He must have buried his face in her hair sometime during the night. “Nya.” Something swatted at his ear, sharp and hard. It kind of hurt. Unburying his face and turning his head, Kevin met the large yellow orbs of a black cat. “Nya.” “Morning.” He yawned. “Nya.” “Did you sleep well?” “Nya.” “Good to know.” “Nya.” “… You don’t really say anything other than ‘nya’ do you? Shouldn’t you be ‘meowing’ instead? You know, like a cat should?” The cat tilted her head. “Nya?” “… Never mind.

And you expect me to believe that?” Shaking his head, Kevin left Iris and Kirihime to their bickering. He headed over to Lilian just as she was discarding her flip-flops. It was almost amusing to watch as she stuck her feet into the sand, clenching and unclenching her toes so as to feel the tiny grains between them. It was even more amusing when she took a stance, feet sliding until they were shoulder width apart, left hand on her hip and right clenched into a fist near her face. Kevin knew she’d gotten that pose from an anime or a manga—probably several. It was a common pose, after all. “All right! It’s time to get wet!” He facepalmed. “That’s really not something you should be saying in public.” He looked over at Justin, Alex, and Andrew, all of whom were lying on the ground, twitching. Blood squirted from their noses like oil from a broken gas line. “Really not something you should say in public.

After trying to bodysurf, the group decided to play with a beachball. “Lilian.” Kevin bumped the ball with an underhand hit that sent it sailing towards the redhead standing opposite of him. “Alex.” Lilian, in turn, hit the ball to Alex, who bumped it to Eric. “Gothic Hottie!” “Stop calling me that!” Despite her tsukkomi act, Christine didn’t miss a beat and hit the beach ball towards Andrew, who then bounced it at Iris. “Snow Wench.” Christine gritted her teeth as Iris gleefully smacked the ball towards her harder than necessary. “Fox Cunt.” In retaliation, Christine hit the ball twice as hard, not even bothering to hide that fact by lobbing it high like Iris had done. “Bitch Tits.” Iris returned the retaliation by reinforcing her muscles and smacking the ball again. The ball ended up getting whacked so hard that it was a wonder the thing didn’t pop. “Go suck a dick, bitch!” “Maybe later. And at least I can get a dick to suck. I’d be surprised if anyone wanted you touching theirs, flatty.” “I wouldn’t mind if Gothic Hottie sucked my—” “Not another word out of you, pervert!” “BUAFF!” And just like that, their game ended when Christine slammed the ball into Eric’s face, not only causing it to burst, but also sending the perverted lech into blissful catatonia.

Is something wrong, Beloved?” Lilian asked, sitting beside him and munching on a bag of chips. “Naw.” Kevin dismissed his worry with a grin. “I’m just surprised that a tentacle monster hasn’t risen from the ocean and started randomly groping people.” A perfectly valid concern. “Don’t jinx it,” Lilian warned him. “Knowing the author as I do, he might very well decide to do that now that you’ve mentioned it.” Also a perfectly valid concern. Kevin’s eyes widened. “You’re right! With how cruel and sadistic he is, it wouldn’t surprise me if people started getting tentacle-raped for no reason.” I take offense to that. “Ugh,” Kevin groaned, “I really shouldn’t have opened my big mouth.” “What the hell are you two talking about?” asked Christine. “We’re talking about—” Kevin stopped talking. His eyes went through a series of rapid blinks, then he turned to Lilian. “What were we talking about again?” “Ha…” Lilian sighed in disappointment. “It seems the power is still weak in you.” “That’s because Kevin-sama is a human,” Kotohime interjected herself into the conversation. Kevin crossed his arms. “And what’s that supposed to mean?” “She’s talking about your ability to break the fourth wall,” Iris commented. She lay on her side, traces of sand clinging erotically to her still wet skin, which glistened in the sunlight. Kevin shook his head. How does she make everything look so freaking sexy? “Indeed.” Kotohime nodded. “I suspect that the only reason Kevin-sama is even capable of doing this much is because of his exposure to kitsune.” Lilian tilted her head before nodding. “That makes sense. So, does that mean that Kevin would lose his ability to break the fourth wall if we stopped living with him?” “Stop talking about me like I’m not even here!” “Probably. After all, Kevin-sama is just a human.” “What’s that supposed to mean?!” “Ufufufu, nothing at all, Kevin-sama.

Kevin awoke, not with the slow realization that came from regaining consciousness, nor with the startled gasp of a man having a nightmare, nor even the groan that was stereotypical of anime characters when they wake up—no, when Kevin woke up, it was to the feeling of a hand being shoved down his throat. His eyes snapped wide open. However, he still couldn’t see anything. His eyes perceived nothing beyond the amalgam of blurred colors, mixing and matching and morphing and changing, a sickening compendium that his mind couldn’t comprehend. Images flashed past his vision. A walk on the beach. Red hair. A swell. A raging torrent, an infinite tide of water rising into the sky, cresting against the heavens. He tried to cough, to hack, to something, but it was no use. The hand remained shoved firmly down his throat. And then it was gone. Kevin gagged, and then coughed out what must have been several gallons of water. Each cough wracked his body with pain. Each breath caused his ribs to creak. Even the slightest movement hurt. Something appeared in front of him. It was a blurry green object. What… the… heck? “I’m glad to see that you’re awake,” the shape said. Kevin blinked. “Tell me, how many fingers am I holding up?” “Fingers…” Was what he meant to say. “Fssshrrsss…” Was what he said. “Hmm, it seems your eyesight is a bit unfocused. Here, let me fix that for you.” Kevin would have asked what this object—person? — meant, but he never got the chance—because something smacked him in the head. Hard. “Ouch!” Kevin covered his face with his hands. Gods that hurt! What the hell was he just hit with? A mallet? “What the heck was that for, you crazy coot?!” “Ho? Can you see me now? How many fingers am I holding up?” Kevin was about to answer, but words fled when he realized who—no, what stood before him. Scaly green skin covered a small, squat body, clothed in a plain brown robe. This… thing stood with a stoop. It had a hunch of some kind, and Kevin was certain that the robe was covering something big attached to its back. A really long neck protruded from the robes, which was attached to a reptilian and very bald head. It was holding up three fingers. Mainly because it only had three fingers. “Holy crap, it’s a Ninja Turtle!” The “Ninja Turtle” twitched. “I am not a Ninja Turtle!” It shouted. “Don’t confuse those sea turtle rejects with me!” “Holy crap, it talks!” More twitching. “Of course I talk, you idiot!

All four figures skidded to a halt. Three sets of eyes widened in recognition. “You!” Kevin was the first to respond, pointing an accusing finger at the blond kitsune. “You’re the fop who kept hitting on my mate!” “And you’re that human who thinks he’s hot shit when he’s really not!” “Hey! That’s rude!” The kitsune deadpanned. “So is calling me a fop.” “Aw, whatever,” Kevin dismissed the man. “You are a fop. I mean, just look at your hair.” A tick mark appeared on the kitsune’s forehead. “What’s wrong with my hair?” “Nothing, nothing at all… if you’re a girl, that is.” “Oh, that does it. I’m not usually one for fighting a human, but you’ve pissed me off, kid.” The kitsune rolled up his imaginary sleeves… and then he paused. “Wait a minute. Did you say mate?” That’s when his eyes landed on Lilian in her hybrid form. Kitsune are very vain creatures. They are naturally drawn to beauty. While what is and is not beautiful is subjective, there are some things that can be considered universally beautiful. Iris is a perfect example of this, and so is Lilian. Kevin gained several throbbing veins on his forehead when he noticed the blond fox’s lecherous gaze. “Stop-ogling-my-mate-you-damn-pervert-kick!” “Buaf!

Ken was thrown backwards by Kevin’s powerful double heel kick. Kevin, having used the kitsune as a springboard, flipped through the air and landed in a crouch. The two-tailed fox was not so lucky. After sailing through the air, he hit the ground. Hard. “Urk!” Ken nearly swallowed his tongue as he slammed into the ground. He continued to tumble across the asphalt for several more feet before coming to a halt. Kevin stood back up and clapped his hands several times, wearing an expression that epitomized satisfaction. He turned his head to look at his mate and the flabbergasted kappa. “You just kicked a kitsune,” Kyle stated the obvious. “That I did.” Kevin nodded, quite proud of himself. This was the first time he’d managed that kick without landing on his back. “You two should get going. I can handle things here.” “You sure?” Kyle appeared dubious. “You may have gotten the drop on him, but that guy is still a kitsune, and, well, you’re just a human.” Two sets of cheeks puffed up simultaneously. “Don’t underestimate me! Who the hell do you think I am?” Kevin shouted, pointing at Kyle. Don’t underestimate my mate! Who the hell do you think he is?” Lilian also shouted. She was also pointing at Kyle. The kappa looked at the two of them, his face slowly deadpanning. “You two just did that in synch.” Kevin and Lilian tilted their heads at the same time. Their expressions were almost identical. “We did?” “Yes, you did.” The two might have responded to Kyle’s words, but they were forced to scramble out of the way when a drill made of water crashed into the ground, which cracked underneath the intense pressure. They looked at the person who’d created it—Ken, once again on his feet, with blood trailing down his forehead, and his two tails writhing in furious agitation. “Quit ignoring me!” “Oh, right,” Kevin muttered. “You’re still here.” “Are you saying you forgot about me already?!” “I’m sorry. You’re just not that important.” “What?!” Ken gawked. “That’s what happens when you’re a fop,” Lilian added. “Ugh.” “Yeah, nobody likes a fop,” Kevin agreed. “Gurk.” “Especially not pretty boy fops,” even Kyle got in on the action. “Shut up!” Ken growled, his cheeks almost neon red. “Shut up, shut up, shut up! I’ll show you! I’ll prove to all of you that I’m not a fop!” “Only someone who’s a fop would bother trying to prove that he’s not a fop,” Kevin chided.

Justin then turned to Eric. “… Jabidaya…” Indeed, Eric had dressed up as his favorite anime character, the perverted teacher of Natsumo Uzukami: Jabidaya. Waist-length white hair ran down his back like a lion’s mane. A headband with metal plate that had a dildo etched onto the center wrapped around his forehead, allowing two spiky locks from his wig to descend on either side of his face like a pair of testicles. A red jacket worn over a green long-sleeved shirt went down to his knees. Green pants and wooden geta sandals made up the rest of his ensemble. Judging from the quality of the outfit, it was one of those cheap ones that people bought online.

Look, Belove—I mean, Sensei! It’s Natsumo and Satsuki! We have to get a picture with them!” Kevin looked at where Lilian was pointing. Indeed, standing not several feet away were the two titular characters of the Natsumo Shinobi series. If the obnoxious orange jumpsuit that Natsumo wore so often wasn’t enough to confirm this, then the hair-style shaped like a duck’s rear end that Satsuki was known for having did. “Yosh!” Kevin, still in the character of Mito Gay, the flamboyant martial arts master, grinned at his mate, who was currently dressed as his apprentice, Mook Lee. “Come, Lee, let us ask that youthful couple if they would like to take a picture with us.

He wasn’t given time to think on this development as, not even a second later, several lances coalesced into existence around him. “Let’s see you dodge this,” Ken said, smiling widely. “Water Art: Numerous Spears.” “And people say I’m horrible at naming things—eek!

Hawa! It’s my family!” Camellia’s smile was brighter than a star as she waved at them. “Kirikiri, Iris, Lilian, Kevin-kyun! Hullo!” “Um, hello, Camellia,” Kevin muttered, warily eying the soldiers, who were looking at them stupidly. “My Lady, are… are you well? You’re not hurt, are you?” Kirihime asked, her fingers twitching, clearly longing to reach for the daggers under her dress. “Um!” Camellia nodded joyfully. “These nice people kept me company.” The “nice people” that Camellia mentioned snapped out of their fugue. They looked from the group of kitsune to Camellia, then back to the kitsune. Camellia again. Then the kitsune one more time. For good measure. “So, wait, these are the people you’re looking for?” one of the soldiers asked. “Yes!” Camellia’s sunny smile hadn’t changed in the slightest. She was completely unaware of the heavy tension pervading the atmosphere. “Those two are my daughters, and that’s Kevin-kyun, and that one is Kirikiri.” “Daughters,” one of the men muttered, eyes straying to the tails writhing behind the backs of the three kitsune. “Your daughters are kitsune.” “Of course,” Camellia said as if the answer should have been obvious. “I’m a kitsune, too.” As she spoke, five tails emerged from underneath her magical girl skirt, and her ears sprouted fur and became long and pointed. The group of spandex-clad men eyed each other. Anxiety was written all over their faces. They looked at Camellia’s still smiling face, then at the other four people. Kirihime had now taken out her knives, Lilian had several orbs of light orbiting her, and Iris had summoned some void fire, which hovered over her tails. Kevin didn’t have a weapon, or superpowers, but that didn’t stop him from preparing for combat. “We’re screwed, aren’t we?” asked one of the men. Everyone sans Camellia nodded. “Thought so.” ***

Is that so?” Kevin rolled onto his back and stared up at the tree ceiling, counting the rings in the wood. Pondering her words, he eventually gave a chuckle. “Maybe I’m a half-yokai.” “Please don’t joke like that, Beloved,” Lilian stated flatly. “That would be a terrible plot device.” “You think so?” “I know so.

Christine froze as her face turned a shade of blue that had yet to be discovered by man.

HOLD STILL WHILE I KILL YOU TWO!!” “N-now Christine, please calm down.” “Yeah… t-this isn’t something to get upset over.” “DIE!!” “IYAHN!” As they got closer to Kevin, Iris, and Lilian’s hut, loud shouting reached their ears. “Ufufufu, it seems Lilian-sama and Kevin-sama have done something to upset their friend.” Kotohime smiled placidly. “I wonder what they could have done…” “It sounds like Christine is up and about, and she’s even more lively than usual,” Orin said, seemingly in agreement. “HOLD STILL SO I CAN MURDER YOU TWO!!” “GYAA!!” came two screams, one masculine and the other feminine. “Lively… right,” Cien mumbled dryly. “I’m not sure ‘lively’ is the right word for it.” “Ho?” Orin raised an eyebrow. “Then what would you call it?” “I’LL FUCKING MURDER YOU BOTH DEAD!!!” “Have mercy!!” “How about murderous?” Cien suggested.

Kneeling down next to an article of clothing, Kevin looked up to see Christine a few feet away, gathering up one of her extravagant lolita dresses. Looking at her like this, the girl really did look cute, like a fragile porcelain doll. As he continued to watch her, his eyes landed on the black choker around her neck. “Isn’t that the choker that I bought you for your birthday a while back?” Kevin asked. Christine paused in her work. Her hand went to her choker. “A-ah, um, yes, it is. I… well, this is my… my favorite choker, so I like to wear it a lot…” Christine’s cheeks flushed once more, but she at least didn’t seem to be blowing her top. “After you, Iris, and Lilian left, I was really lonely. I hadn’t realized how important all of you were to me until you were gone. Ever since that day, ever since you three went off to Greece, I’ve taken to wearing this, because it reminded me of all the good times we’ve shared together.” That was probably the most honest thing he’d ever heard Christine say since she’d confessed her feelings for him. He’d noticed it before, but Christine really was a tsundere. She rarely ever told anyone what she was really thinking, and she covered up her embarrassment with bluster and violence. Moments like this were rare for her. He could count the number of times where she’d been honest with her feelings on one hand and still have fingers left over. “I’m sorry we left you like that,” Kevin apologized. Christine shook her head. “You don’t need to apologize. I know that you didn’t have much of a choice. Had you not left, then…” Then he, Lilian, and Iris would have put everyone in danger. Back then, Lilian had been targeted by the Shénshèng Clan. One of its members, a three-tailed kitsune named Fan had attacked them during Lindsay’s soccer game. Iris had nearly been killed and Kevin had destroyed an entire school building just to defeat Fan. Christine had been there when it happened, so she understood why they had to leave. “Thank you for being so understanding,” he said. Christine quickly turned her back to him. “T-there’s no need to thank me. We’re friends. I-I was only doing what any good friend would do.” Tsundere until the end, Kevin thought with an amused chuckle. “Then, Christine, I’m very glad that you’re my friend.” Christine squeaked. As she sputtered incoherently, Kevin finally grabbed the article that he’d been kneeling over. Blinking when he realized that it felt different than everything else that he’d picked up thus far, he held the article up to study it. “What is this…?” He trailed off. The object in his hands… was Christine’s panties. “Uh…” Kevin could hear his brain sizzling. “W-what are you doing, idiot!? Don’t stare at those!” Christine leapt at him, and Kevin, too shocked by the object in his hands to do anything, let her tackle him to the ground. The panties were thrown from his hands as his back slammed into the floor. Spots appeared in his vision, but they were soon replaced by Christine’s face, which hovered not two inches from his own. Their noses were almost touching. “C-Christine?” He felt his eyes widen as Christine’s face inched a little closer to his. This was bad. This was a very bad situation. Christine was straddling him, and he could feel her thighs touching him, and her body was pressed against him, and… and… Oh, no… Perhaps it was the result of him still being horny because Christine had interrupted him and Lilian while they were having sex, but Kevin felt his arousal skyrocket. Christine felt it, too, because her eyes went even wider and she looked down. He also looked down. Then he looked back up. Their eyes met. Christine’s face was the brightest blue that he’d ever seen. “I can explain this,” Kevin said calmly. “KYA!” The sound of Christine’s scream was followed by a loud slap.

Hey, Kevin?” Christine interrupted. “Yes?” “What the heck is up with that apron?” Kevin looked down at his apron. It was mostly black, except for the very front on his chest, which depicted a desolate desert landscape with many cooking knives embedded into the ground. Likewise, the sky was made up of many steel pots and pans. Within the center of these knives was a blond-haired, blue-eyed chibi figure holding a kitchen knife in each hand, one black and the other white. It was obviously Kevin. Above the chibi were the words: “I am the bone of my skillet.

She spun around to face the dragon as it swooped down on her like, well, like a giant ass reptile with wings.

Those two are going to be our entertainment tonight, meow,” the man said, his grin stretching from ear to ear. “They have so graciously volunteered themselves, and so it would be rude not to accept their offer, meow. You may kill the boy, but bring the girl to me alive. You know how much I love to entertain the ladies, meow.” Kevin was not one for swearing. However, in that moment, only one phrase came to mind that he believed could adequately describe what he felt just then. “Fuck me sideways.” Despite their situation, Iris’s eyes gleamed. “With pleasure.” “Quiet, you!” “Tch!

Just then, the door to his living room slammed open. He blinked. Two people, a boy and a girl, rushed into the room and closed the door behind them before running further into the room. It took them a second, but they soon realized that they weren’t alone. Eyes of cobalt and carmine stared at him. He stared back, and then raised a hand. “Yo,” he said. “Yo,” they said in unison.

I think we’re in trouble,” Iris stated solemnly. “What an astute observation,” was Kevin’s sarcastic comeback. “So, do you have a plan?” “I was thinking we should make a tactical withdrawal,” Kevin admitted. Iris raised a delicate eyebrow. “So we’re running away?” “We do not run away.” Kevin glared at her while still keeping the kasha in his sights. “We simply withdraw tactically.” “Right.” Iris nodded. “That’s what you call running away.” “… Shut up.

Kitsune Art: Fanboy’s Delight.” Kağan’s body became stock still. His posture stiffened, spine straightening like a nutcracker. A shudder went through his body, visible even through the thick, black fur. It went all the way up from his toes to his head, and then back down again. Small twitches soon followed. Tiny muscles spasms that made his body look like quivering jello. Like a man suffering an epileptic seizure, the spasming grew more intense with each passing second, until the cat yōkai fell onto his back, twitching and jerking, his body seizing up. Froth started pouring from his mouth. Then his eyes rolled up into the back of his head. Several seconds later, Kağan lay still, unmoving save for the stuttering of his chest. Kevin blinked. Once. Then he looked at Iris as she walked over to him. “What kind of illusion did you just cast on him?” Iris’s grin was the kind someone had only when they were immensely pleased with themselves. “I made him watch twenty-four hours of Boku no Pico compressed into six seconds.” Kevin turned green. “I regret asking already. Oh, gods. I think I’m gonna be sick.” “Don’t worry, Stud.” Iris’s reassuring smile did nothing to reassure him. If anything, it did the opposite. “I would never cast that on you.” “I suppose that’s something to feel grateful about.” “After all, if you suddenly became a vegetable, then I would never be able to convince Lily-pad to let me join you two in a threesome.” The sound of Kevin’s palm meeting his face echoed several decibels louder than it should have through the mostly empty street. ***

Come on,” Nerd said in his nasally whine. “Hurry and get in. The boss will be really angry if we leave for too long and he realizes we’re missing.” “You heard the man,” Kevin said as he hefted his ammo bag and squeezed into the back. “I hate it when I’m right,” Iris sighed as she, too, crawled into the back of the vehicle. As she bent over to get in, the man, Nerd, tried to cop a feel of her ass. “Touch her butt and I swear to all eight million Shinto gods, I will shoot you in the face,” Kevin threatened the yōkai. Nerd couldn’t jerk his hand away from Iris’s rear end fast enough.

I think their muscles are bigger than mine. Kevin felt his HP gauge take a major hit. He thought he’d gotten used to the concept of women being physically stronger than him. He lived with Kotohime, trained with Kiara, and got his ass kicked on a daily basis by Heather. Strong women surrounded him. He should have been used to it, but he wasn’t. “Uh…” Kevin tried to think of something to say. “Hello?” All the girls giggled some more. Kevin’s cheeks turned the fiercest shade of red. He was embarrassed, but he didn’t really know why. And that’s when he realized something. He was naked. Naked and tied to a bed. Naked, tied to a bed, and surrounded by beautiful teenage girls. It took everything he had not to freak out. “Hello,” one of the girls breathed, a beautiful blond with sun-kissed skin and vivid blue eyes. Kevin did not like the way she looked at him. It made him feel naked… … Oh, wait. He was naked. “I’ve never seen a man before,” another said, this one a girl with skin like mocha and dark brown eyes. “So this is a penis?” another asked, and Kevin suddenly realized something else. “Don’t touch that!” he snapped, trying to squirm away from the girl, who just giggled at his response and tried touching him again. Fortunately, before the girl could actually grab his phallic weapon of DOOM,

Phoebe ignored him. “I was very impressed by your fighting prowess. You are quite strong and skilled—for a human.” “Uh, thanks, I guess. But, what’s this about my role in your village?” “Yes, yes, I was getting to that.” Phoebe seemed to mistake his panic for excitement, for she gave him a very enchanting and very disturbing smile. “Our original plan was to gather as many men as possible in order to have them help us repopulate our numbers. However, after seeing you fight, I have decided that you will be the one who helps us increase our village’s dwindling population.” “Eh?” Kevin stared at the girl, not quite comprehending her words. “Your job will be to procreate with everyone in my village,” Phoebe continued. “What?” “Your sperm shall ensure that our population increases back to its former glory.” “Huh?” “And your genes will ensure that all of our children are strong and hardy.” “Eh?” “They shall all become great warriors. Isn’t that exciting?” “… Huh?

You should already know by now that such an attack is—Gya!!!” Shinkuro’s words were cut off by an abrupt squeal of pain. Even the beams chasing Kevin were disrupted, dispersing back into their elementary particles. The Celestial Kyūbi directed a pained grimace at Lilian, whose teeth were clamped firmly on one of his golden tails. “You bit me,” he said, as if feeling the need to state the obvious.

INTRUDERS! WE HAVE INTRUDERS! SOUND THE ALARM! SOUND THE—” Bang! Iris, Phoebe, and the others remained silent as the Shaolin monk kitsune went down, steam rising from his head. They stared for several seconds, and then looked at Kevin, or, more specifically, the gun in his hand, which was pointed at the now unconscious fox-man. “What?” Kevin asked. “You just shot him,” Iris pointed out. “Thank you, Captain Obvious.” Kevin’s voice was so rank with sarcasm that the word sarcasm didn’t really do it justice. “Please, feel free to point out something else. Maybe something that I don’t already know.” Iris frowned at him. “Okay, then, how about this? You just shot your gun, and it was really loud. I’m pretty sure everyone in the entire palace heard it.” As if her words held prophetic powers, the sound of rushing feet echoed down the hall. The sound of running was followed by shouting. “I think I heard something this way!” “Do you think it’s intruders?!” “Could be!” “Let’s check it out!” “Oh, hell.” Kevin felt like facepalming.

Camellia’s breasts broke her fall.

He turned to the lumbering crowd who, in the last two hours, had sacrificed a bit of their time to heal a stranger and thrown themselves into a fight against one hell of an angel. These were the GoneGod World’s lost, but as I stared out at the crowd of kitsune, alps and vodniks, dwarves, wondjinas, and pixies, the hodge-podge of Others who had travelled from all over the world to try to better themselves, in their ill-fitting clothes and with their confused looks, I knew I was standing before this world’s elite.

You should have seen your face!” Ninko exclaimed. “You were all ‘ahhh’ *crash* ‘ahhhh!’ *crash*! Over and over again!

Among the diverse array of what humans assume to be mythical creatures, there was the Cynergian fox; kitsune; dragon-fox; kumiho and so forth. But however people wished to identify them, they were, at the heart of it, a fox.

Is there going to be dragons? We love dragons! Not sure they’ll show up in this series, but we do have a dragon series in mind…

a powerful weapon that caught his opponents off-guard. Kitsune instantly earned the admiration of her teammates

How’d you get all this?” “We’ve had a man on the inside for a while now,” Taiki said. He glanced at Kitsune. “Another type of job in the guild.” Kenji nodded, his gaze still fixed on the map. He poured over the reconnaissance reports, muttering to himself as he took notes. Kitsune peered over his shoulder, impressed by the sheer number of details the spy had uncovered.

As she caught her breath, Kitsune let out an exhilarated laugh. They had done it!

I promise we aren’t here to hurt you.” “Said every bad guy ever,” Kitsune mumbled under her breath.

There was no way she could stop that many arrows from turning her into Swiss cheese if they’d wanted to take her out.

Bone snake is a dumb name,” Ninko said. “Who would be scared of a snake’s skeleton?” “Do snakes even have bones?” Yoko asked.

Kitsune shrugged. “I don’t know... it’s just a style that... I can feel.

They were all essentially creatures with humanoid features, similarly to how the Gnoll was part hyena and part Human.  The Satyrs were part goat; Harpies were part bird; Werewolves were, obviously, part wolf; Minotaurs were part bull; Kobolds were part dragonoid; Kitsune, part fox; Lizardmen were part lizard; Ratunda were small rat-like creatures that walked on two feet; Ursino were part bear; Pachyds had elephant in them; and, regretfully, Slothar were part sloth.

The first tier is Wood, Stone, and Iron. The second Gold, Redstone, and Emerald. The final tier is Diamond and Netherite.” “What do the tires do?” Kitsune asked.

KITSUNE Known as the Japanese nine-tailed fox, the Kitsune is identified as a trickster with paranormal abilities and extreme intelligence.

Sleep sucked me down to dreams of pastries, warm fruity tea, and big dicks.

inspired by a mythical creature from Japanese folklore. According to legend, certain Japanese red foxes, or kitsune, magically grow an additional tail for every thousand years they have lived.

Twisted pistons!” Clyde called. “I can’t get this thingamajig to go back in the whatchamadoodle. Unless it goes in this doohickey…” “Sounds very technical,” Kitsune said.

Tsurutontan Roppongi $ Japanese, Udon Grab a quick bowl of authentic kitsune udon at reasonable prices at Tsurutontan. Address: Roppongi 3Chome Building,

This is not one of the bandits,” she said. Gavril looked closer at the shadow-stalker-abandoned corpse. “You are correct,” he said, as if with some surprise. She gave him a look. “Thank you. So it seems we are stuck in the middle—sorry, the edge of the steppes—with no horses and a useless wagon and a landscape populated by shadow stalkers. If they are indeed raised by some confederate of your father’s, then we should be safe enough. We simply need to find this sorcerer and turn ourselves in to him to be returned to your father and resume our original mission. However, the fact that it”—Moria waved at the shadow stalker—“attempted to attack you suggests we are not safe at all. What is going on here, Kitsune?” “I . . . I’m thinking.” “If you do it aloud, perhaps I can help. Unless you still think me a dull-witted Northerner.” “I only said that to needle you.” “You also did it in front of your father.” “As I said, it was to convince him you were not intellectually capable . . .” He stopped and scowled at her. “You’re needling me now, Keeper. Playing on my guilt to make me share my thoughts.” “I do not believe I am intellectually capable of such cunning—” “Enough. 

At the mention of Kiara, the man gripped the water pitcher in his hand hard enough that Kevin thought the handle would shatter. Did this man have a grudge against Kiara? He didn’t think so, but then, who could say for sure. For all Kevin knew, this man could have asked Kiara out on a date, thinking his bishounen good looks would make her swoon over him—and had then been disappointed when she told him that wimpy maggots who sparkled didn’t do it for her. Kevin could totally see that happening. “Yes,

By Inari’s left nut sack!” Iris exclaimed. “What is that?” “That,” Kotohime did not take her eyes off the metallic creature, whose red-visored face craned around to look at them, “is one of the machines that Kirihime and I fought when Heather-san was injured.” Kotohime’s words forced everyone into silence. In a situation like this, none of them knew what to say. “Hawa.” Except for Camellia.

Good idea,” Iris started before frowning. “I just have one question.” “What’s that?” Kevin asked. “How are we going to get to the distribution center?” Kevin blinked. Then he looked at his car—his totaled car, which looked more like scrap metal than a car. He looked back at everyone else, who watched the emotions flickering across his face in rapid succession. In a situation like this, Kevin could only think of one thing to say. “Hawa.

Eric?” “Yes?” “If your phone was in your pocket, then what’s that in your hand?” A short, yet awkward silence ensued— “There he is! That’s the pervert who stole my underwear!” —At least, it did until a horde of girls ran up and one of them pointed at Eric before shouting. “Uh-oh.” Eric leapt from his seat. “Here, hold these.” He shoved what he’d been holding into Lindsay’s hands and then bolted. “GET BACK HERE, YOU DAMN PERVERT!” “YOU’LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!” Eric shouted back at the girls. Unfortunately, because he had turned his head to do so, he wasn’t watching where he was going and tripped over a chair. The girls used that opportunity to swarm him like hungry piranhas. Soon, the perverted young man’s screams filled the air. Throughout it all, Lindsay sat there, blinking as she looked down at the item in her hands. It was an article of clothing. To be more precise, it was a pair of panties. She stared at the white lace garment in her hands, trying to resist the temptation. Don’t do it, Lindsay. You’re better than this. You’re better than Eric. You don’t want to do this. But she did. She did want to do this. After discreetly looking around to make sure no one was watching her, Lindsay held the panties up to her face and took several deep whiffs. “These… these smell really good,” she mumbled before noticing her audience. Alex and Andrew were gawking at her, their jaws wide enough that a fist could have passed through them, and their eyes the size of hockey pucks. Lindsay blushed and went back to her salad. The rest of lunch was very awkward.

Lilian felt a fire burning in her soul, which manifested into ethereal flames that burned around her like an aura. She was so pumped up. They were going to do this! They had to do this! Then, once they started protesting, their sheer awesomeness would make everyone else snap to their senses and join them—just like in a shōnen manga! Yes, she could see it all now: Lilian stood in front of the camera, Kevin by her side, holding her hand. In front of them was a woman with a microphone and a cameraman stood behind her, filming their triumphant moment. “Ms. Pnév̱ma, you and your mate have just brought peace between humans and yōkai. What are you going to do next?” asked the woman with the microphone. “We’re going to celebrate by having sex!” Lilian declared. “Lots and lots of sex,” Kevin added. “Uh huh…” “And then we’re going to Disneyland!” The newscaster stared at her oddly, and even Kevin was looking at her like she’d said something strange. In response to their expressions, Lilian covered her mouth with her hand in a very Kotohime-esque manner. “Ufufufu, sorry. I’ve always wanted to say that at least once.

So, you actually showed up, after all,” a voice said behind him. Kevin resisted a groan as he turned around. Frederic stood before him, closing the door as he made his way inside the room. “I see.” Kevin sighed. “This letter was from you. I’m guessing you plan on confronting me and threatening to beat me up if I keep spending time with Lilian, yes?” Frederic stopped midstep. He blinked. Once. “Uh, yes,” he said, sounding surprised. “How did you—” “Please, this is one of the oldest cliches in the history of romance anime.” Kevin rolled his eyes. “I’m honestly surprised it hasn’t happened to me before now, considering the way my life has gone. I sometimes feel like I stepped into Rosario+Vampire…” Kevin paused as realization flashed through his mind like a bolt of lightning. “Wait a minute! Rosario+Vampire ended with humans becoming aware of monsters, which is what’s happening to us right now!” Frederic took a step back. “What are you talking about?” “This… this is the discovery of the century!” “Oi! Are you listening to me!?” “I have to tell Lilian about this!” “SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME!” Kevin blinked several times as he was brought back to the real world. Frederic glared at him, huffing and puffing, his face red enough to make anime females everywhere jealous. “I’m sorry,” Kevin apologized, feeling mildly abashed. Someone was trying to threaten him into not spending time with his mate, and here he was, ignoring them. “I can’t believe how rude I’m being. Go ahead. Please continue with your pointless monologue about how I should stop spending time with Lilian or you’ll make me regret it.” “Thank you,” Frederic said, and then paused. “Did you just insult me?” “Of course not. Now, you were saying?

Oh, no,” Kirihime whispered in horror. A naked Camellia running around the base was not something she wanted to deal with. This is not good! Kirihime burst out the door. She didn’t even bother locking up and just ran down the hall, using the enhancement technique to run faster. “Lady Camellia!” She turned a corner and was just in time to see Camellia standing inside of an elevator, the doors slowly sliding shut. “Bye, bye, Kiri-Kiri!” Camellia waved at Kirihime, who rushed for the door. However, not even the enhancement technique gave her enough speed to reach her mistress before the doors shut. Kirihime slammed into the door, then fell onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. “This… this is really not good. Not good at all.” *** Kevin, dressed in jeans and a white T-shirt that conformed to his torso, exited the locker room and began the long walk back to his apartment. His muscles ached from his most recent exercises. He and Kiara had been trying to discover more about his power. They had learned a lot through experimentation. It seemed his strange ability only worked on barriers, but they didn’t work on anything else, which he’d learned the hard way after suffering several full-on youki attacks from the powerful inu. Still, this power is pretty useful, even if it’s just the ability to break barriers. Kevin looked at his left hand. This hand seemed to be where this strange power was contained. He’d tried breaking through Kiara’s barrier with his right hand but had only received severe burns for his troubles. I wonder if it only works on barriers? Can I use it for anything else? Kiara had described his unique skill as the “ability to unlock barriers,” and indeed, when watching his power at work, it did look more like unlocking than destroying. When he touched Kiara’s aura, the red energy would peel apart like a blooming flower. The energy didn’t dissipate either. It still existed, but it moved around his hand, meaning that he wasn’t destroying it, just moving it out of the way. Kiara’s aura isn’t a barrier either, not really. It stands to reason this power can work on more than just barriers. “Kkkkkeeeeeevvvvviiiinnnnnn…………….” Kevin stopped walking, his head tilting in idle curiosity as he heard someone calling his name. “Kkkkkkyyyyyuuuuuunnnnnnnn!!!!” His eyes widening, Kevin swiftly spun around as the source of the voice got louder. He promptly found two large, round, soft things being shoved into his face. “Uwa!!” He tumbled to the floor, taking the other person with him. Delightful, childish laughter told him exactly who had crashed into him tits first. Kevin felt almost resigned. Why do these things keep happening to me?

Someone get the camera and start filming!” the oni shouted. A yōkai with a weasel-like face rushed to do as told. The oni then leaned down and whispered in her ear, his grating voice and breath on her neck making Lindsay shiver. “You’re gonna die today, bitch. I’m gonna fucking kill you.” Oh, God! Lindsay felt her bladder threaten to go. Her body was a shivering wreck. She couldn’t control it. Her mind had become overridden with fear. She didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t do anything. She was helpless! The weasel-faced yōkai turned to face them, the camera on. The oni grinned as he gripped Lindsay’s head between his hands. Lindsay sobbed. This was it. She was going to die. She was going to die and there was nothing she could do about it. I don’t wanna die… Visions flashed before her eyes, images of her friends, of her family, of the people she would leave behind. Please… She thought about Kevin, the boy she still sorta liked, even though he was a male. Someone… She thought about Christine, the girl she did like, and regret welled up inside of her as she realized she would never see the yuki-onna again. Help… “I want everyone to watch this,” the oni said, but his voice sounded far away. Lindsay’s mind was locked, clammed up with fear and overflowing with remorse. “This is what happens to humans who think they can befriend us! You should all learn to fear yōkai!” This… this is the end. Lindsay closed her eyes, hoping against hope that it would make the end less painful, that maybe, just maybe, if she closed her eyes, she wouldn’t suffer as much. “Prepare for trouble!” “And make it double!” What? Lindsay’s eyes snapped wide open upon hearing two very familiar voices. She quickly looked toward where she heard the voices and couldn’t believe her eyes. There, standing in the center of the amphitheater, back to back, was Kevin and Lilian. Hope welled up inside of her breast. It was a hope that suddenly stopped, giving way to confusion instead, when she saw their outfits. Are they wearing leather spandex?

To protect the world from douchebags everywhere.” “To defend the innocent with style and flair.” “To decimate idiots who think they’re all that.” “To kick their asses when they’re heads get too fat.” “Kevin.” “Lilian.” “Curb stomping jerks at the speed of sound.” “Surrender now or prepare to get your ass pounded into grass.

Kevin watched as the woman became all fired up. He could practically see the flame-like aura reminiscent of characters from Dragon Warriors X when they were powering up surrounding her body. She looked like Son Wang when he was about to go Super Semen.

Hold it!” a voice rang out. The claws stopped a mere centimeter from the man’s face. A confused look suddenly flashed across his eyes as he, along with everyone else, wondered who would dare to say something during a moment like this. Everyone turned toward the source of the shout to find Kevin and Lilian standing on the table, back to back, with matching smirks plastered on their faces. “To protect the world from douchebags everywhere.” “To defend the innocent with style and flair.” “Kevin.” “Lilian.” “Curb stomping jerks at the speed of light.” “Surrender now or prepare to be stomped into the ground.

Piss off, Dickweed! We both know that I look a thousand times better in this shirt than you!” “The only thing you look good in is an environment suit that hides your ugly ass face! Now let go!” “You let go!” “No, you let go!” “No, you!” “You!” Alex and Andrew were fighting over a shirt. It was an admittedly cool shirt, which depicted Deadpool on the front. He was sitting on a couch and hugging a unicorn with assless chaps. At the same time… they were fighting over a freaking shirt.

Where is the information that you stole from us?” Commander Paine asked again. “Fuck you,” Justin spat. “Insolent shit.” Justin felt bile rise in his throat when Commander Paine slammed a knee into his stomach. His head snapped back, teeth clacking together, when, after doubling over, he received a swift uppercut to the underside of his jaw. Everything grew blurry. He tried to focus, but he couldn’t seem to regain his sensibilities. “I’ll ask one more time, where is the information that you stole from us?” Justin struggled to reply. “I… I gave it to… your mom… after fucking her.” The last thing Justin saw was a boot traveling for his face.

Kiara grinned at them. “Right. Before we infiltrate SOB headquarters, we all need to know the plan that we’re going to use to get in.” “Hold on. What’s SOB headquarters?” asked Kevin. “Sons of Bitches headquarters,” Kiara said proudly. “It’s what I’ve decided to call the Sons and Daughters of Humanity.” “Uh-huh.

Kevin wondered if he was the only person who felt that the sudden silence was awkward. He tapped his index finger against his ebony gun. “So,” Mack started, “a guy walks into a bar and—” “I do not wish to hear any horrible jokes,” Kotohime said. “Let us keep the elevator clichés to a minimum, please.

Holstering one of his guns, Kevin carefully lifted Justin so that he was carrying the other boy over his shoulder. He held up his silver gun, which had been dubbed Ivory in honor of a video game character that he liked.