Furry Alpha Quotes

In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri.

Far back in the mists of ancient time, in the great and glorious days of the former Galactic Empire, life was wild, rich and largely tax free. Mighty starships plied their way between exotic suns, seeking adventure and reward among the furthest reaches of Galactic space. In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri. And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before--and thus was the Empire forged. ...In these enlightened days, of course, no one believes a word of it.

In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women, and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri.

She backed away, one slow sliding step at a time. “I won’t hurt you.” “Says the man who turns into a freaking lion.” “Hey, don’t act like you’re so surprised. I told you I did.” “But I didn’t think you meant it,” she said with a fling of her hands. “Well, now you know. So what?” “What do you mean, ‘so what’? You turn into a lion. You know, big carnivore with giant teeth.” Arik’s lips twisted in a wry grin. “Stop complimenting him. He’ll get an even fatter head.” That caused her to stumble in her retreat. “You mean that lion you turn into… it’s like a separate entity? It hears me?” “He”— his emphasis not hers—“ hears and understands just fine. And he’s being a furry pain in my ass right now.” “Why?” “Because he doesn’t like that you’re scared.

He didn’t get very far, since I was clutching his shirt in my hand. He laughed, and pulled me to sit across his lap. “Better?” “I’m not going furry.” My words slurred together. “It’s totally better.” Imogene snarled. She

Cradling her in his arms, Arik enjoyed the moment. A moment that went on for a while until he felt compelled to ask, “Are you okay?” She stirred against him. Her head tilted far enough for him to see the lazy smile she shot him. “Better than okay.” She wiggled in his arms, and he let her down, hiding his smug satisfaction as she wavered on wobbly legs, a smugness that faded when she said, “That sure beats waking up to Frosted Flakes and milk.” Did she really compare him to— “Processed cereal?” He shuddered. “Don’t tell me you eat that stuff.” “All the time. I like it. It’s fast and easy. Who doesn’t like a bowl of sugar to perk them up in the morning?” “Not me. A lion needs real food.” “Lion? Someone’s got a messed-up opinion of himself,” she teased, not realizing his verbal gaffe. “Although I’ll admit you do kind of remind me of an animal with some of the noises you make.” If she only knew those noises were just the tip of his furry, perfectly tufted tail. “So sue me for being a man who expresses himself vocally when aroused. But I warn you, sue me at your own peril. I have the best lawyer in town on retainer.” “If you ask me, your money would be better spent with a psychiatrist for your ego problem.” “Admit it, my supreme confidence is sexy.” “No, it’s disturbing, but lucky for you, your butt is awesome.

The first time occurred when a powerful alpha male, Yeroen, was in the midst of an intimidation display with all of his hair on end. This is nothing to make fun of. All other apes watch with trepidation, knowing that a male in this testosterone-filled state is keen to make his point: He is the boss. Anyone who gets in the way risks a serious beating. Moving like a furry steam locomotive that would flatten everybody and everything, Yeroen went with heavy steps up a leaning tree trunk that he often stamped on in a steady rhythm until the whole thing would shake and creak to amplify his message of strength and stamina. Every alpha male comes up with his own special effects. It had rained, however, and the trunk was slippery, which explains why at the peak of this spectacle the mighty leader slipped and fell. He held on to the trunk for a second, then dropped to the grass, where he sat looking around, disoriented. With a “the show must go on” attitude, he then wrapped up his performance by running straight at a group of onlookers, scattering them amid screams of fear. Even though Yeroen’s plunge made me laugh out loud, as far as I could tell none of the chimps saw anything remotely comical. They kept their eyes on him as if this was all part of the same show, even though, clearly, it was not how Yeroen had intended things to go. A similar incident happened in a different colony, when the alpha male picked up a hard plastic ball during his display. He often threw this ball up in the air with as much force as possible—the higher the better—after which it would come down somewhere with a loud thud. This time, however, he threw the ball up and checked around with a puzzled expression because the ball had miraculously disappeared. He didn’t know that it was returning to earth by the same trajectory he had launched it on, landing with a smack on his own back. This startled him, and he broke off his display. Again, I found this a rather amusing sight, but none of the chimps showed any reaction that I could tell. Had they been human, they’d have been rolling around, holding their bellies with laughter, or—if fear kept them from doing so—they’d have been pinching one another, turning purple in an attempt to control themselves.