Folder Funny Quotes

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Do you see that man in the black Porsche?" I asked the women. They squinted out at Ranger. "Yes," they said."Your partner." "He's homeless. He's looking for a place to stay and he might be interested in renting Singh's room." Mrs.Apusenja's eyes widened. "We could use the income."She looked at Nonnie and then back at Ranger. "Is he married?" "Nope. He's single. He's a real catch." Connie did something between a gasp and a snort and buried her head back behind the computer. "Thank you for everything." Mrs.Apusenja said. "I suppose you are not such a bad slut. I will go talk to your partner.: "Omigod," Connie said, when the door closed behind the Apusenja's. "Ranger's going to kill you." The Apusenjas stood beside the Porsche, talkig to Ranger for a few long minutes, giving him the big sales pitch. The pitch wound down, Ranger responded, and Mrs. Apusenja looked disappointed. The two women crossed the road and got into the burgundy Escort and quickly drove away. Ranger turned his head in my direction and our eyes met. His expression was still bemused, but this time it was the sort of bemused expression a kid has when he's pulling the wings off a fly. "Uh-Oh,"Connie said. I whipped around and faced Connie. "Quick, give me an FTA. You're backed up, right? For God's sake, give me something fast. I need a reason to stand here until he calms down!" Connie shoved a pile of folders at me. "Pick one. Any one! Oh shit, he's getting out of his car.".... He leaned into me and his lips brushed the shell of my ear. "Feeling playful?" "I don't know what you're talking about." "Watch your back babe. I will get even." -Ranger and Stephanie
Janet Evanovich (To the Nines (Stephanie Plum, #9))
The smell of new office supplies is so satisfying while being kicked out of Staples for inappropriate behavior with a file folder is so embarrassing.
Ryan Lilly (Write like no one is reading)
I have a folder that’s labeled “The Folder of 24.” Inside it are letters from twenty-four people who were actively in the process of planning their suicide, but who stopped and got help—not because of what I wrote on my blog, but because of the amazing response from the community of people who read it and said, “Me too.” They were saved by the people who wrote about losing their mother or father or child to suicide and how they’d do anything to go back and convince them not to believe the lies mental illness tells you. They were saved by the people who offered up encouragement and songs and lyrics and poems and talismans and mantras that worked for them and that might work for a stranger in need. There are twenty-four people alive today who are still here because people were brave enough to talk about their struggles, or compassionate enough to convince others of their worth, or who simply said, “I don’t understand your illness, but I know that the world is better with you in it.
Jenny Lawson (Furiously Happy: A Funny Book About Horrible Things)
If it was an emergency, you would have hung up and called back. Over and over again. Leaving progressively more and more threatening messages about what you were going to do to me when you did finally get a hold of me,” he told her, signing off on the bottom of the letter he’d just finished and moving it to the side. “I would never do that,” she said. “No?” When she did finally send him reports it was always in folders that were named things like I’m Not Your Fucking Secretary and If You Ask Me to Get You Coffee It Will Definitely Have Turtle Shit In It. “If I really needed your attention, I’d start texting. Photos. Naked photos.” His entire body reacted to that. He cleared his throat. “I would definitely—.” “Of my grandfather.” Bennett paused. Then groaned. He knew her grandfather. Leo Landry was a great guy. Funny, down-to-earth, honest, loyal. And someone that Bennett absolutely did not ever want to see naked. Ever. “You’re an evil woman.” “Remember that.
Erin Nicholas (Crazy Rich Cajuns (Boys of the Bayou, #4))
By all means, stay,” Anne said. “Have a seat. We’ll take care of you next.” “Yeah, see, I think someone else is going to be on trial next.” Baring my teeth at her in a grin I pulled out my file folder. “I’ve got some interesting reading here. And I even brought copies for everyone so you don’t have to share.” A distinguished-looking South American man on the end shook his head. “What is this? Another farce?” “No, but bonus points for using a funny word. You really want to read what I have here. Anne, you’ll be especially interested, since you have a starring role.” “Enough. Rhia—” Reth quickly flicked his wrist at her; her mouth kept moving, but no sound came out. It was one of the most satisfying things I’d ever seen. Sure, that trick had sucked when he used it on me, but I wholly approved of it now.
Kiersten White (Endlessly (Paranormalcy, #3))
Turns out, I also have a folder with 3,523 pictures of the marriage. The title is My Wedding ft Tin Man. Which I buy, to be honest. I see myself naming it that. Other options would be *My Wedding and He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named as a Prop* or *I Got Married. He’s Only Here for the Pictures.*
Rina Kent (God of War (Legacy of Gods, #6))
It’s not a matter of having enough raw talent. Talent needs to be channeled and developed in order to become something more than a momentary spark. Actor and comedian Jerry Seinfeld, arguably the most influential comedian of his generation, wrote in his book Is This Anything?: Whenever I came up with a funny bit, whether it happened on a stage, in a conversation or working it out on my preferred canvas, the big yellow legal pad, I kept it in one of those old-school accordion folders . . . A lot of people I’ve talked to seemed surprised that I’ve kept all these notes. I don’t understand why they think that. I don’t understand why I’ve kept anything else. What could possibly be of more value?
Tiago Forte (Building a Second Brain: A Proven Method to Organise Your Digital Life and Unlock Your Creative Potential)
Sparlo here. I read through your folder. And, Dana, you are a very frank and funny and fearless writer. I admire your audaciousness. You’ve inspired me to be more audacious myself.” Tears filled my eyes. “I hope you do go into ministry,” he went on. “We’d be lucky to have you in our ranks.
Michelle Huneven (Search)
Ever been arrested?" Bill leaned forward, his expression impossible to read. Yes, actually. But it wasn't my fault. "No, sir!" Was it Sir? Lord? Lady? I shouldn't have done the accent! Fantastic! He pulled out a small, black folder and an ink pad from the front pocket of his pants. "I'll just need your prints here and here, so we can do a background check. The questionnaire is pretty straight forward." I had a sudden vision of getting found out and my escape including dodging bullets and trees, while narrowly making it through a crack in the shrubs, only to get hit by a car. I started the slow process of inking my fingers and pressing them to the paper with Bill's help. They stuck, then came up. I was going to prison. That's where honesty got me! Prison!
Rachel Van Dyken (Dirty Exes (Liars, Inc., #1))
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Arjun Raj Gaind (BLADE OF THE WARRIOR: KSHATRIYA ISSUE 2)
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Arjun Raj Gaind (Blade Of The Warrior : Kshatriya 01 of 04)