Elevator Hitch Quotes

Not unnaturally, many elevators imbued with intelligence and precognition became terribly frustrated with the mindless business of going up and down, up and down, experimented briefly with the notion of going sideways, as a sort of existential protest, demanded participation in the decision-making process and finally took to squatting in basements sulking. An impoverished hitch-hiker visiting any planets in the Sirius star system these days can pick up easy money working as a counsellor for neurotic elevators.

Jesus shined-up Christ on a trailer hitch.

He pushes back, still trapping me against the elevator wall. His breath hitches against my mouth, maybe overwhelmed at the newness of being with a man. Like he’s been starving for this his whole life and wants to drink his entire fill in one go.

I can’t be your friend,” I tell him, walking out of the elevator, and then stop, taking what little bit of strength I have inside me. He watches me, his own tears in his eyes. “I can’t be your friend because I’m in love with you.” I say the words out loud instead of just in my head, and his breath hitches, and he opens his mouth. “I’m in love with you with everything that I have,” I tell him, “but it’s not enough. I can’t love you for both of us.

One day one of the elevators was out of order because of a technical hitch. It gave rise to a line stretching as far as the eye could see. Having to wait their turn does not bring out the best in our residents: there’s a great deal of pushing, shoving, ankle bashing, and cursing. Bakker: “Goddamned crap elevator!” Not exactly a good title for the latest Hello Kitty book. There were shocked, indignant glares and some oohing and tsk-tsking.

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