“
Blitzen!” Junior suddenly appeared. He crutched toward me with his rocket-powered walker and a lot of friends. “Get him, boys!”
“Ha! Eat light, Junior!” I unleashed the power of the mini bed.
Sadly, instead of a turn-you-to-stone laser beam, a weak glow enveloped Junior like a soft blanket. The charge had run out. A thin crust formed around him. It was nowhere near as dramatic as instant petrification, but it was startling enough to make the other dwarves pause.
And that made me think about how I looked to them. A dwarf who handcrafts a weapon that I know what it’s like to be petrified. It stinks. So I had every intention of cutting Alviss free on his next pass-by and then dipping him in the river to restore him. But before I could, the stalactite attached to the rope broke. Alviss’s momentum carried him over the cliff edge. He landed with a splash in the water below.
“Oops.” I peered down, then waved my hand dismissively. “Ah, he’ll be fine.”
“Blitzen!” Junior suddenly appeared. He crutched toward me with his rocket-powered walker and a lot of friends. “Get him, boys!”
“Ha! Eat light, Junior!” I unleashed the power of the mini bed.
Sadly, instead of a turn-you-to-stone laser beam, a weak glow enveloped Junior like a soft blanket. The charge had run out. A thin crust formed around him. It was nowhere near as dramatic as instant petrification, but it was startling enough to make the other dwarves pause.
And that made me think about how I looked to them. A dwarf who handcrafts a weapon that petrifies other dwarves? Not cool.
“Listen!” I yelled. “My argument is with Junior, not you. When he decrustifies, tell him I want to talk.”
I put the mini bed on the ground and showed them my empty hands while slowly backing away.
It would have been a very powerful moment if I hadn’t backed off the cliff into the river. As I thrashed through the churning water toward shore, three things occurred to me. One, Junior would never, ever forgive me. Two, my cashmere hoodie was ruined. And three . . . Mimir owed me a lot more than a quarter.
”
”