Car Valet Quotes

If you order some servant to bring food, I'm leaving." "I was going to make sure Albert hadn't moved the car." "Oh, right. Albert the butler." "He's a valet, actually." "You are not helping yourself.

Like a valet who commits grand theft auto not to go for a joy ride but to open a used car lot, so do we seize upon love not to revel in its ecstasies but to haggle over its blue-book value.

Fact: life is a giant classroom and every day is an opportunity to learn something new. Fact: you have to be prepared for pop quizzes, because they can come from anywhere or anyone. Also fact: I wished I'd called in sick today. What I learned from professor Frosty? How to properly boost cars. The guy could do wicked things with a single piece of wire. "I'm a criminal now," I lamented as we soared down the highway. Killing in self defense didn't count. "I'm an accomplice. A thief." "Actually," he said smoothly, "you're a freelance valet. All you're doing is moving a car from one location to another. There's nothing wrong with that, now, is there?

I find that, in general, the amount of sharing men do with each other in one year is about the same as what I share with my female friends while we wait for our cars at the valet.

I noticed the valet stand, but didn't think to look for the valet. My frustration with Lily - and the fact that she was still updating the blog over which she was being blackmailed - may have caused me to throw my door open slightly harder than necessary. And then I saw the valet. In my defense, I wasn't used to people opening my car door for me, and he only made a small wheezing sound when it nailed him in the stomach. I stood and reached out to steady him by the arm. "You okay?" The valet's hazel eyes rested on mine. "I'll live.

A valet pulled up in a sleek-lined sports car painted that particular shade of red peculiar to expensive vehicles and hookers’ lipstick.

I find that, in general, the amount of sharing men do with each other in one year is about the same as what I share with my female friends while we wait for our cars at the valet. I

taking it,’ he said as he fumbled for his wallet to pay for the bottle. With that, he grabbed June’s hand and practically lifted her up. ‘Come on, we’re going.’ June had another fit of the giggles. It was the longest mile for Pope. The valet was surprised to see them again so soon. They got into the elevator, only to have to wait ‘til they got back to the room before he could rip the dress off her. With them in the elevator car were a Chinese couple and their six-year-old son. Pope used June as a human shield to hide his erection, but to get even, he kept rubbing his hardness against her backside. She desperately tried to stop laughing but failed miserably, causing the family to wonder what was so funny. Thank God for magnetic keys, because if he’d had to fumble with a traditional key to open the door, he was certain that they would just have to do it right there. The rest of the evening was consumed with passion that was fiery, unreserved, and delirious. ‘I can’t remember having

For the rest of Kat’s childhood, she moved from one relative’s house to another’s, up and down the East Coast, living in four homes before entering high school. Finally, in high school, she lived for a few years with her grandmother, her mom’s mom, whom she called “G-Ma.” No one ever talked about her mom’s murder. “In my family, my past was ‘The Big Unmentionable’—including my role in putting my own father in jail,” she says. In high school, Kat appeared to be doing well. She was an honor student who played four varsity sports. Beneath the surface, however, “I was secretly self-medicating with alcohol because otherwise, by the time everything stopped and it got quiet at night, I could not sleep, I would just lie there and a terrible panic would overtake me.” She went to college, failed out, went back, and graduated. She went to work in advertising, and one day, dissatisfied, quit. She went back to grad school, piling up debt. She became a teacher. Kat quit that job too, when a relationship she had formed with another teacher imploded. At the age of thirty-four, Kat went to stay with her brother and his family in Hawaii. She got a job as a valet, parking cars. “I’d come home from parking cars all day and curl up on my bed in the back bedroom of my brother’s house, and lie there feeling desperate and alone, my heart beating with anxiety.

The letter I wrote after my son was born said, “You might think you want an expensive car, a fancy watch, and a huge house. But I’m telling you, you don’t. What you want is respect and admiration from other people, and you think having expensive stuff will bring it. It almost never does—especially from the people you want to respect and admire you.” I learned that as a valet, when I began thinking about all the people driving up to the hotel in their Ferraris, watching me gawk. People must gawk everywhere they went, and I’m sure they loved it. I’m sure they felt admired. But did they know I did not care about them, or even notice them? Did they know I was only gawking at the car, and imagining myself in the driver’s seat? Did they buy a Ferrari thinking it would bring them admiration without realizing that I—and likely most others—who are impressed with the car didn’t actually give them, the driver, a moment’s thought? Does this same idea apply to those living in big homes? Almost certainly. Jewelry and clothes? Yep. My point here is not to abandon the pursuit of wealth. Or even fancy cars. I like both. It’s a subtle recognition that people generally aspire to be respected and admired by others, and using money to buy fancy things may bring less of it than you imagine. If respect and admiration are your goal, be careful how you seek it. Humility, kindness, and empathy will bring you more respect than horsepower ever will. We’re not done talking about Ferraris.

Occasionally he’d get a letter like the one in 1947 from the silly attorney in Ohio, chastising him for his parsimonious treatment of his Negro valet, Rochester, and threatening to sue on Rochester’s behalf. But as Cleveland Amory pointed out in the Saturday Evening Post, the real Rochester wasn’t complaining: he “has never been anybody’s valet, has a block-large estate and three servants of his own, drives an expensive car and a big station wagon, and, when not working—which he does two days a week for some $700 per air-time minute—spends his leisure hours either yachting or supervising his well-stocked racing stable.

We pulled into Spago and let the valet have the car. Lucy suggested that I wear my Groucho Marx nose as a disguise to prevent adoring fans from mobbing me, but I pointed out that then everyone might think I was Groucho Marx and I would be mobbed anyway. I decided to risk going as myself.

had once managed in half a day to replace the entire engine on a 1995 Mercedes with one from some old wreck, doing such a flawless job that the returning owner left the valet an especially large tip for having cleaned the car for him.

The parking lot is jammed—the valets sprint from car to car. They play full-metal Tetris. They swerve, reverse at speed, never clip a bumper.

There’s some pretty high-profile people there,” Jay announces through the small chip in my ear. I’ll be taking it out before I get out of the car. Currently, I’m in a line, waiting for valet parking. “Including the president,” Jay tacks on at the end.

Swicord is not a New Age nut; she's a writer. And even after mega-wrangles with Mattel's management—the musical was sketched out but never produced—she is still a fan of the doll. "Barbie," she said, "is bigger than all those executives. She has lasted through many regimes. She's lasted through neglect. She's survived the feminist backlash. In countries where they don't even sell makeup or have anything like our dating rituals, they play with Barbie. Barbie embodies not a cultural view of femininity but the essence of woman." Over the course of two interviews with Swicord, her young daughters played with their Barbies. I watched one wrap her tiny fist around the doll's legs and move it forward by hopping. It looked as if she were plunging the doll into the earth—or, in any event, into the bedroom floor. And while I handle words like "empowering" with tongs, it's a good description of her daughters' Barbie play. The girls do not live in a matriarchal household. Their father, Swicord's husband, Nicholas Kazan, who wrote the screenplay for Reversal of Fortune, is very much a presence in their lives. Still, the girls play in a female-run universe, where women are queens and men are drones. The ratio of Barbies to Kens is about eight to one. Barbie works, drives, owns the house, and occasionally exploits Ken for sex. But even that is infrequent: In one scenario, Ken was so inconsequential that the girls made him a valet parking attendant. His entire role was to bring the cars around for the Barbies.

Chez les riches, la solitude et le suicide spirituel; chez les pauvres, l’envie et le meurtre, car on a conféré des droits, mais on n’a pas encore indiqué les moyens d’assouvir les besoins. On assure que le monde, en abrégeant les distances, en transmettant la pensée dans les airs, s’unira toujours davantage, que la fraternité régnera. Hélas! Ne croyez pas à cette union des hommes. Concevant la liberté comme l’accroissement des besoins et leur prompte satisfaction, ils altèrent leur nature, car ils font naître en eux une foule de désirs insensés, d’habitudes et d’imaginations absurdes. Ils ne vivent que pour s’envier mutuellement, pour la sensualité et l’ostentation. Donner des dîners, voyager, posséder des équipages, des grades, des valets, passe pour une nécessité à laquelle on sacrifie jusqu’à sa vie, son honneur et l’amour de l’humanité, on se tuera même, faute de pouvoir la satisfaire. Il en est de même chez ceux qui ne sont pas riches; quant aux pauvres, l’inassouvissement des besoins et l’envie sont pour le moment noyés dans l’ivresse.

Avery was so eager to begin their lives in their new home he'd held the reception in their backyard. The party tent sat between the house and the St. Croix River. Valets greeted guests, parked the cars, and shuttled people from the front of the house back to the tent. This was all designed to have Kane one step closer to moving into their new home tonight. That pleased Avery far more than anything else they'd done this evening. No more separate homes or forced separation for fear of living in sin.

Andy remained seated. I chirped, “Sir, please tell me the reason for your visit. My guardian is fully aware of your proposal.” Struck by my candidness, Ozwalt stammered, “Very well, I will tell you the reason I’m here,” he raised his voice in displeasure. “Your counterproposal is deplorable!” My lover remarked aggressively, “What’s deplorable about Young wishing to be kept in the style he is accustomed to?” The Englishman exclaimed, “He’s not even of age to drive, and he wants a Lamborghini or a Ferrari? What is he thinking?!” “You offered him a city car,” my Valet countered. “He has every right to ask for what he desires.” The man repudiated defensively, “I offered him a city car upon his coming of age to drive, not before!” He was seething with anger. “Atop this, he demands a luxury penthouse in Mayfair or Park Lane, not to mention the live-in personal tutor! Is he insane? Most adults wouldn’t be able to afford a luxury flat and experienced educator, let alone an adolescent who is barely out of his teens.” “Sir, if you do not have the financial capabilities to accommodate the boy’s expectations, there are others who are perfectly capable of doing so,” my chaperone asserted. “Andy! Are you telling me that the lad has other well-endowed suitors willing to pay for such frivolousness?” My lover and I sniggered at the Englishman’s comment, but we managed to suppress our mirth. My guardian answered solemnly, “That, Sir, is none of your concern. I presume you’re here to discuss Young’s counterproposal, not the proposals of his other suitors.” He was taken aback by my mentor’s forthrightness. He raised his voice in retaliation. “I’m here to talk to Young. I would like Young to speak for himself.” I spoke unrelentingly, “I have asked Andy to negotiate on my behalf. I have heard everything he has said and challenge none of it. If my terms are not met, I’m afraid our arrangement is over. There is no further need for discussion.” By now, Ozwalt was on fire. He waved his fist at me and shouted, “You rapacious whore! You’re nothing but a self-indulgent sybaritic slut from a third-world country!” Before he could continue lambasting me with further insults, Wilhem entered. “What’s going on here?” my big-brother questioned. Mossey resumed berating my integrity, calling me a barrage of repugnant names while my chaperones carted him off the campus grounds to his waiting chauffeur and Bentley. Groups of students stood gaping at the wild man, speculating about the nature of the ruckus they were witnessing.

Most of my life has been spent in a room full of men, and I have learned the different ways they communicate. I find that, in general, the amount of sharing men do with each other in one year is about the same as what I share with my female friends while we wait for our cars at the valet.

Q: Why should old people always use valet parking? A: Valets don’t forget where they park your car.

I had always thought that a lost soul referred to the soul’s destination, not its condition. But it’s the condition that is the real problem. If a car no longer works, it doesn’t matter much whether it ends up in a junkyard or the valet parking section of the Ritz-Carlton. We are not lost because we are going to wind up in the wrong place. We are going to wind up in the wrong place because we are lost.

So I took a quick circuit around the circular driveway. There were a couple of cars parked ostentatiously along the edge of the pavement: a Ferrari, a Bentley, and a Corniche. I didn’t think our killer would be driving anything that cost more than a new house on the water, but I looked inside anyway. They were empty. The valet parking attendant watched me skeptically as I came back from looking into the Corniche. “You like it?” he asked me.

No matter how fast, an electric car could never muster up the mixed feelings of admiration and jealousy that his twelve-cylinder Aston Martin did when he dropped it with a valet.

Better not fuck in here. The bill for valeting this car is starting to approach the cost of Donald Trump’s hairspray.

Je l’ai prié de me suivre dans une pièce fermée. Il a refusé de s’asseoir. Je me suis alors assis devant lui et durant une heure et quart, je lui ai parlé de sa mort imminente. Je lui ai décrit la progression des symptômes. De sa souffrance. Du délire fébrile. De la puanteur croissante de sa pourriture… J’étais tour à tour détaché et proche, froid et compatissant, précis et grossier. Étrange corps à corps. Bras de fer vaguement pervers. En un sens, j’avais gagné d’avance, moi qui étais bien vivant et bien portant. Mais, aussi bien, j’avais perdu d’avance car lui, le presque mort, n’avait plus rien à perdre. Il marchait dans la pièce, tantôt nerveux, tantôt ailleurs. Parfois ému. Souvent ricanant. Maniaque. Jouissant de la folle immortalité du mégalomane. Il tenait sa vie et sa mort dans sa main. Il était tout-puissant. Devant ce Dieu, je n’étais rien. Il jouait tout, décidait de tout. Moi, je blablatais à ses pieds, fonctionnaire, préposé au guichet de la santé pépère. Ridicule valet de la normalité, mon urgence n’était pas la sienne. Son temps n’était pas le mien. Il était d’une autre essence, d’une autre hauteur. C’est comme ça quand ils sont jeunes. La jeunesse est immortelle. Elle ignore le temps. Aussi la mort n’a pas de poids. Elle n’est que bande dessinée. Rigolade. C’est une mort de carton. Une affaire héroïque de violence, de révolte et de sang. Une explosion. Un orgasme. Une giclure. La mort fait bander. Elle est affaire de couilles. Histoire d’homme. Crever jeune, c’est dire merde au monde. Et le foutre bien profond. La jeunesse, à la face du temps, pisse de l’infini.

The parallels to The Lone Ranger continued. The Green Hornet would ride in a sleek modern automobile, the ’30s equivalent of “the great horse Silver.” Like the Ranger, the Hornet would fight for the law but operate outside it and usually be mistaken by police for one of the criminals. And there would be a faithful sidekick: as the Lone Ranger had his Tonto (brave and stoic, man of a different race, with a simple name of two syllables, ending in o), Britt Reid’s Filipino valet, Kato, would be “the only living man to know him as the Green Hornet.” Kato was a master chemist who created the gas guns and smokescreens that became part of the Green Hornet’s arsenal. He was an expert in the secrets of Oriental combat, and he was blessed with keen intelligence. A college graduate, he could cook, care for a house, and drive with the skills of a racecar professional. The car too had a name: Black Beauty. It whirred distinctively as Reid and Kato went into action in the abandoned-looking building that was reached “through a secret panel in Britt Reid’s bedroom … along a narrow passage built within the wall itself … down narrow, creaking steps that led around a corner” to the structure “on a little-used dead-end side street.

We went to dinner the other night at a place that had a complimentary valet. I was disappointed when he only parked my car. I expected him to say, "You're a handsome man and eloquent of speech" since it was complementary and all, or at least, "You are dressed far better than that hobo over there and smell less odiferous" Alas it was not to be,

I told you the name of the commercial jingle I wrote. You could always google it and—” “That’s research. Not happening,” I huffed. “Too much work?” “Too annoying. You know my brother’s name and that my mom is miserable and that I know the words to more eighties songs than I should admit. Fess up. It’s only fair.” “Okay…” He pulled into the driveway of a posh boutique hotel on Sunset and parked behind a Tesla near the modern-looking entry. Then he unfastened his seat belt and glanced up at the valet rounding the front of his car before refocusing on me. “My favorite color is blue, I’m an only child, my parents both died five years ago within a month of each other and…I’m going commando right now. How ’bout that drink?

Le monde a proclamé la liberté, ces dernières années surtout ; mais que représente cette liberté ! Rien que l'esclavage et le suicide ! Car le monde dit : "Tu as des besoins, assouvis-les, tu possèdes les mêmes droits que les grands, et les riches. Ne crains donc pas de les assouvir, accrois-les même" ; voilà ce qu'on enseigne maintenant. Telle est leur conception de la liberté. Et que résulte-t-il de ce droit à accroître les besoins ? Chez les riches, la solitude et le suicide spirituel ; chez les pauvres, l'envie et le meurtre, car on a conféré des droits, mais on n'a pas encore indiqué les moyens d'assouvir les besoins. On assure que le monde, en abrégeant les distances, en transmettant la pensée dans les airs, s'unira toujours davantage, que la fraternité règnera. Hélas ! ne croyez pas à cette union des hommes. Concevant la liberté comme l'accroissement des besoins et leur prompte satisfaction, ils altèrent leur nature, car ils font naître en eux une foule de désirs insensés, d'habitudes et d'imaginations absurdes. Ils ne vivent que pour s'envier mutuellement, pour la sensualité et l'ostentation. Donner des dîners, voyager, posséder des équipages, des grades, des valets, passe pour une nécessité à laquelle on sacrifie jusqu'à sa vie, son honneur et l'amour de l'humanité, on se tuera même, faute de pouvoir la satisfaire. Il en est de même chez ceux qui ne sont pas riches ; quant aux pauvres, l'inassouvissement des besoins et l'envie sont pour le moment noyés dans l'ivresse. Mais bientôt, au lieu de vin, ils s'enivreront de sang, c'est le but vers lequel on les mène. Dites-moi si un tel homme est libre.

The best part of being a valet is getting to drive some of the coolest cars ever to touch pavement. Guests came in driving Ferraris, Lamborghinis, Rolls-Royces--the whole aristocratic fleet. It was my dream to have one of these cars of my own, because (I thought) they sent such a strong signal to others that you made it. You're smart. You're rich. You have taste. You're important. Look at me. The irony is that I rarely ever looked at them, the drivers. When you see someone driving a nice car, you rarely think, " Wow, the guy driving that car is cool." Instead, you think, "Wow, if I had that car people would think I'm cool." Subconscious or not, this is how people think. There is a paradox here: people tend to want wealth to signal to others that they should be liked or admired. But in reality those other people often bypass admiring you, not because they don't think wealth is admirable, but because they use your wealth as a benchmark for their own desire to be liked and admired. The letter I wrote to my son after he was born said, "You might think you want an expensive car, a fancy watch, and a huge house. But I'm telling you, you don't. What you want is respect and admiration from other people, and you think having expensive stuff will bring it. It almost never does--especially from the people you want to respect and admire you." It's a subtle recognition that people generally aspire to be respected and admired by others, and using money to buy fancy things may bring less of it than you imagine. If respect and admiration are your goals, be careful how you seek it. Humility, kindness, and empathy will bring you more respect than horsepower ever will.