The Lightning Struck Heart Quotes

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You’re a talking unicorn,” I said. “Sometimes when you poop, it comes out as rainbows and smells like cookies. There is nothing subtle about you.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You know what they say, once you go dragon, all the rest is just laggin’.” “No one says that,” I said. “Absolutely no one.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Because you love me,” I said, sounding smug. “More like you grew on me,” he said. “Like fungus.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I don’t have time for all the relations and courting and wooing bullshit,” I said. “I’m a wizard. I have quests.” “Uh, you’re an apprentice,” Gary said. “And you’re sent on errands.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Please let it be known that from this day forward my working title for the business is now 'Queen of the Fuck Palace!
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You okay, Sam?” “Ha-ha, why wouldn’t I be? Everything is peachy! I’m okay. I’m better than okay.” “Okay. I only ask because you haven’t stopped staring at me for the last four hours.” “You lie with all your lies!
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
The color of your dress really brings out the extraordinary paleness of your skin tone. Are you unwell? Dying, perhaps?
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Horse?” Gary snarled. The pretty unicorn act dropped immediately. Red sparks shot from his nose. “Did you just call me a horse? Listen here, you two-legged bag of shit. I’m not a motherfucking horse. I am a unicorn, and I am magic and a beautiful creature made of fucking sunshine and rainbows and good feelings.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I wish I could find that one person made for me so that way I can show them why I was made for them.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I’m a dragon, and maybe if you’re lucky, I’ll be dragon my balls across your face later.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Look. This has been… fun.” Lie. This had been nerve-racking and I needed to go masturbate. “But I have to go. I’ve got stuff to do before I head out again.” Masturbate. “Wizard stuff. Like… secret wizard stuff.” Masturbate.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I’m sorry I made an oath. I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do. And I’m sorry that I can’t break it. But you have to believe me that it’s always been you. I promise. I promise." His voice cracked and my hands shook. "I promise, because when I look upon these stars, there is nothing I wish for more than you.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
If Sam were a tree, you know what kind of tree he’d be?” “What kind?” “A pine. Because of all the pining.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Good-bye, self-esteem and fuzzy feelings. It was so nice to make your acquaintance.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You just have to believe,” I said as I flexed. “I believe you should work out more if you’re going to keep doing that,” Gary said. “Because it’s making me feel sad for you.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Or not,” I said as I ground my teeth. “I like to masticate by myself.” “And you’re so good at it,” Gary said. “The up and down motions of your… jaw. And then, upon completion, you swallow. Right, Sam? You swallow, don’t you?” “Of course I do,” I said, confused. What the hell were we talking about now? “I always swallow when I finish. What am I supposed to do? Spit it back out?
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I am a strong, independent unicorn, and I will not take your shit.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
We went into the Dark Woods and I almost had to get gay fairy married again and now I feel really bad and Ryan got bad-touched by trees and Fairy King Dimitri was cryptic and annoying and apparently has a size kink.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
No cursing,” I scolded him. “You’re a knight. You don’t get to do that. You gave up that right when you swore your oath to the King. You have to lead by example now. So say stuff like ‘fudge toast’ and ‘mothercrackers’ instead of ‘shit whore’ and ‘fuck storm.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Hi, Sam!" "Hi, Tiggy." "You okay?" "Yes, Tiggy." "Tiggy smash something for Sam?" "No, Tiggy." "Tiggy smash something for Sam." He smashed one of the wooden sparring dummies. "Thank you, Tiggy." "Tiggy smash!" he bellowed and then proceeded to smash three more.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
How is that weird?” Dark the First asked incredulously. “Literally everyone does it. Literally.” “I really wish you’d stop saying literally,” Dark the Second said. “I literally don’t think you understand what that word means.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Pfft,” I scoffed. “Feelings. I don’t have feelings.” I had so many feelings. None of them were good.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I like your shoes,” I said. Because I did. They were pink and pointed, and I wanted a pair like that so bad. My mom and dad groaned. Morgan looked at me and cocked his head. “Thank you, little one. I made them out of the tears of a succubus and a lightning-struck tree stump I found under the Winter Moon. I like your face.” I grinned. “Thank you, big one. My parents made it when they got married. I was a honeymoon baby, whatever that means.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I’m going to have to work out even more now tomorrow to make up for all the potatoes and bread. Okay. I feel bad. That was a lie. I’m not going to work out at all. That sounds just awful.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Gary, why Sam sweating?” “Well you see, my dear Tiggy. When a boy loves another boy very much, it makes him awkward and have feelings in his penis and mmmphh!” “Sam, why you use magic and glue Gary’s mouth shut?” “Is that what that was? Gosh! I just thought I was singing to myself!” “MMMMPH!
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Hi, my name is Ryan Foxheart. Oh no! There’s danger afoot! Let me pull out my sword and pose.” I mimed pulling a sword from my side and cocked an eyebrow. “Notice how dashing I am. And immaculate. And today, my hair is parted on the right. Wink.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Gary snorted. When he did, little pink and purple sparkles shot out his nose. Being a unicorn is awesome like that.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I squawked attractively. Okay. That was a lie. There is no way to squawk attractively. It was rather unattractive. Arms flailing, legs kicking. It was just awful.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I winked at myself in the mirror and then realized that’s what douchebags did, so I vowed to never do it again. I
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
The first time I met him, I accidentally turned his nose into a penis. I was young and thought about dick a lot.” Ryan almost fell down. For no apparent reason. He wasn’t even walking. I arched an eyebrow at him. “You okay?” “I just…,” Ryan started. “I don’t….Sam.” “That pretty much sums up how we all feel about Sam,” Gary said. “Fond with strong overtures of horror.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Gary’s eyes narrowed. “I’m pretty sure I don’t like you.” “My world is crumbling,” Ryan said. I might have laughed. Because sass.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Honey bear,” the unicorn said. “You are the gayest thing I’ve seen since I last saw my own reflection.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You can’t own what belongs to the world.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You follow your heart because one day, it’ll lead you home.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Dad," I admonished lightly. "You can't threaten the King. You'll be pooping in buckets by nightfall." "I don't care," he retorted. "I'd poop in buckets for the rest of my life if it means your heart was safe.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I like you,” Gary finally said in a low voice. “Thank you? I thought you already did.” “No. Like, I really like you. Before, I was just pretending. I actually think I almost despised you. But now I don’t.” “You almost despised me.” “Almost.” “And now you don’t.” “Now I don’t.” “Because….” Gary breathed more on his face, nostrils flaring. Then (finally), “Unicorns are fickle creatures. I don’t need a reason to change my mind. It’s been done and you should just accept it and be thankful I no longer plot to murder you in your sleep.” “Testify,” Tiggy said. “So now you have affection for me,” Ryan said, “and you—” “I didn’t say affection. I said I liked you, not that I’m ready to pick out curtains. Gods. Calm the fuck down. You’re engaged to be married. I will not be your dirty little secret. I am a strong, independent unicorn, and I will not take your shit.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Are you trying to protect me?" I asked, starting to get slightly pissed. "Dude. Knock it off. You're not my knight in shining armor. You're a dick in dented tin.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
The unicorn stared at him. Then, “Gary.” “Your name is Gary,” Sam said. “Yes.” “Ah. That’s… not very unicorn-like.” Gary scowled. “And what is unicorn-like?” Sam shrugged. “I don’t know. Like Princess Moon Cloud or Ethereal Tear or Star Shine.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
It's you," I said, not able to look away. "It's how I feel when I'm with you. How I think I've always felt. You're my lightning-struck heart. It doesn't matter about the cornerstone. It doesn't matter about who I am or who you are. Not to me. I think it would have always been this way for me. Even if we had never escaped the slums. Ever since the beginning. Ever since I've known you, you've struck my heart, and now I have to let you go because you're not mine to keep. I need someone that I can be strong for. But I need someone who can also be strong for me.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Ryan shrugged. “You’re adorable. With your angry glitter.” And Gary blushed. His whole face. Never before in the strange and sordid history of our super-best friendship had I ever seen him blush.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Sam never gonna find a boyfriend,” Tiggy said. “No one gonna take his flower.” “Don’t talk about my flower!
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Everything is so vast. It’s humbling to remember just how small we really are.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Anyway,” I said loudly. “Are we good? Did the Priest give us enough hoodoo so we can get the fu—fudge out? Sorry, Father.” “It’s okay,” the priest assured me. “I’m pretty sure your soul is already doomed.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
But you have to believe me that it’s always been you. I promise. I promise.” His voice cracked and my hands shook. “I promise, because when I look upon these stars, there is nothing I wish for more than you.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Are they speaking in code?” Mom asked Dad, trying to be quiet but failing miserably. “I don’t know,” Dad said. “I don’t speak wizard.” “Neither do I. I feel like we’ve failed as parents.” “Nah,” Dad said easily. “Look at him. He’s adorable and knows how to put on his own pants. We did good.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
He grinned at me again, and the butterflies in my stomach turned into dragons and laid waste to my innards.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I glanced back at my merry little band of travelers. A hornless gay unicorn. A half-giant. A knight who was a jerk but that I wanted to have for breakfast.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
So, funny story. There are fairies? In the Dark Woods. And I might have pissed off their king.” There was silence. Then, “Of course you did.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I’m about to hug the crap out of you,” I warned him. “Like, full-on feelings hug where it goes on for a bit too long and becomes slightly awkward and we both clear our throats and shuffle our feet when it’s over.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I didn’t want to go to my room. I wanted to go see Gary and bitch and moan and braid his mane and have him tell me that Justin was a giant cockfucker and I was so much prettier than him.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I’m sorry. Were you just speaking to me? I apologize most profusely. I was distracted by the size of the sweat stains under your arms. Are you overly warm today? It seems unlikely given the cold, dead heart that surely beats in your chest.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Muscles. (Not that I could see them under the knight’s armor, but I had a very vivid imagination and I was not ashamed to use it.)
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
There is beauty in the written word,
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You can’t say your wish out loud. Not when you look up at the stars. If you do, it won’t come true. And I can’t… I can’t allow that to happen to you.” He watched me. I watched him back.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Another fairy flew up, carrying a spear and wearing a helmet and not much else. I thought about asking why he had armor on his head and not his balls, but I didn’t think that was proper etiquette while being held prisoner by the Dark Woods fairies.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
found out I really hated dancing with strangers who were trying to get up in my business, so I filled in the silence with vivid descriptions of how we’d have at least ten kids and that I knew a spell that would allow us to get pregnant so we could take turns just popping out the ass babies. I’m pretty sure a couple of them all but ran by the time we’d finished. I waved after them.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Sam said he doesn’t have time for a boyfriend, much less Knight Delicious Face.” “Remind me why you call him that?” Pete asked. “Uh, pretty simple, Pete,” I said. “He’s a knight. And his face is delicious.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You took something from the King," I said. "Did I?" the dragon growled. "And what might that be?" "You know." "Say it." "The Prince." "Ah," the dragon said. "I'm sorry, but your prince is in another castle." "What?" I was confused. What other castle? It sighed. "You young people today. Never respecting the classics.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
My fairy drag mother. The woman who had taught me to trust myself and my instincts. Morgan could teach me magic. My parents could teach me morals. Gary and Tiggy could teach me brotherhood. But Mama taught me that while life had sharp edges, it would only cut you if you allowed it to.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Fifteen-year-old Sam had seen twenty-year-old Ryan for the first time and had immediately run upstairs and jerked off. It had been a revolutionary and enlightening experience that essentially answered the question that yes, I was indeed very, very gay.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Sam’s just dealing with some issues. He recently came to the realization that he’s a twenty-year-old virgin prude.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Mom said, “He didn’t want to sleep with you so he knocked you through a building? That’s rude. He could have just moved on.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Oh dear gods. I think my underwear just fell off.” “Nicole,” Tina hissed. “Keep your comments to yourself! Be a respectable fucking lady, for fuck’s sake!
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Can you sign something?” Nicole demanded. “This paper? This napkin? My chest? My inner thighs or my wildest dreams? Whatever you want.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
In the Lakota/Sioux tradition, a person who is grieving is considered most wakan, most holy. There's a sense that when someone is struck by the sudden lightning of loss, he or she stands on the threshold of the spirit world. The prayers of those who grieve are considered especially strong, and it is proper to ask them for their help. You might recall what it's like to be with someone who has grieved deeply. The person has no layer of protection, nothing left to defend. The mystery is looking out through that person's eyes. For the time being, he or she has accepted the reality of loss and has stopped clinging to the past or grasping at the future. In the groundless openness of sorrow, there is a wholeness of presence and a deep natural wisdom.
Tara Brach (True Refuge: Finding Peace and Freedom in Your Own Awakened Heart)
Morgan said, “And what have you brought me?” “Something unexpected,” Sam said proudly. “You return from the wilds with a half-giant and a unicorn,” Morgan said. “That is very unexpected.” But the boy shook his head. “That’s not the unexpected part.” Morgan, in his infinite wisdom, said, “Oh?” “I went into the wilds alone, and I returned with friends,” Sam said. “I’ve never had a friend on my own before. And now I have two. Unexpectedly.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Today has been so weird,” I side-whispered to Gary. “I think the word you’re looking for is erotic,” he said back. “Today has been so erotic.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
How do I look?” Gary asked, posing obscenely.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I just like looking at nice things. And want to touch them with my mouth.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I was too busy writing sad ballads to unrequited love in my head and planning a life where my hand would be my boyfriend.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Ryan said, “What the hell? Does everything want to have sex with you?
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You went full-on bitchy and made a dramatic exit?” He sounded way too gleeful over my histrionics. “I have taught you well, my young apprentice.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Dragons,” I said. “They’re hoarders. They keep the things they think are pretty. Gold and jewels. In this case, Justin. To each his own, I guess.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Sorry,” he muttered as he pulled it away. “Sure,” I said faintly. “Sure.” I wondered how to go about asking him to poke me with his sword again.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Life is all about chances. It’s all about these little moments that add up to greatness. And there are times when you have to grab greatness by the balls and say, ‘Hey! Greatness! I’ve got your nuts and you can’t do a single godsdamn thing about it!
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Morgan shrugged. “Simple. I’m asexual.” I blinked. “What?” “Asexual. I don’t find the act of sex appealing. I’d much rather have the emotional connections I do have, not the intimate ones I do without.” I nodded. “Yep. Sounds good. I’m asexual too. Let’s go announce that right now so this whole night will be over and done with.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Too bad you’re like my older sister. We could have been something special.” I narrowed my eyes at him. “Older? You’re seventy-six!” “Boo, you whore,” he said.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I could appreciate the older man. I had eyes, after all. He was all tall and barrel-chested and rocked a mustache that curled at the ends. Gary and I agreed he was a total KILF.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I couldn’t even begin to guess how old he was. Maybe thirty. Or three hundred. When you’re eleven, anyone older is just old.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
But then they threatened Ryan with death and I was, like, bitch, please. You don’t know who you’re messing with.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
So I said, “Goddammit,” and hugged it out with the both of them, because feelings.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Sam will tell you the same thing when he’s done being speechless. Which, I’ll admit, is a good look on him.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I seem to suffer from a very serious condition called obliviousness by proximity. It causes screaming and the occasional uncontrollable need to stomp stupid wizards for being stupid.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I’m not a prize to be won,” he gasped out. “That was so awesome. You go, girl. Get down with your bad self and preach. We don’t need no mens. We are fierce and hear Sam of Wilds roar.” He puffed out his chest and pranced in place in his fairy ring.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Truth time, boys,” Dad said. “Life is all about chances. It’s all about these little moments that add up to greatness. And there are times when you have to grab greatness by the balls and say, ‘Hey! Greatness! I’ve got your nuts and you can’t do a single godsdamn thing about it!
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Your magic gets me hard,” he said, looking like he wished he could be anywhere but where he was. “When you do anything, I get hard, really. Even your ridiculous sex puns. You remember when you wrapped those Dark wizards in stone at the restaurant?” “Yeah,” I managed to say. “I wanted to tell you that you gave me an e-rock-tion.” He bent over and banged his forehead against the table. “Why, why, why did I say that out loud? Please. Someone. Anyone. Kill me.” “Sex puns,” I breathed. “Knight Delicious Face said a sex pun.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Hey, Sam. Want to join me in the river? We can bathe before the sun sets and it gets too cold.” “Sweet molasses.” “What?” “Stay back, foul temptress!” “What?” “Er. Not you. Uh. I… sensed the presence of a succubus. Like, near here. Ooooh. So very near.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I fell in love with Ryan, you got jealous, then I fell out of love with him because he seemed needy, you tied me up, I got half a chubby because it reminded me of Octavio, and now you have a date with Ryan. Oops. I mean Todd. Gosh, I’m beat. What a long night.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Tell me,” Kevin growled. “Do you often make demands of your gods? Is that what you think they’re there for? For humans like you to lay your burdens upon them, to do as you ask, and if they don’t, you doubt them? Tell me, woman. Is that what you are asking? Of a god?
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Oh, sweet mercy!” I cried at him. “Please don’t make my nipples explode! ”His bushy eyebrows went almost up to his hairline. “I wish I could say I’ve never heard that one before, but strangely enough, that’s likely the sixth time someone has said that to me in the last week.” “Wow,” I said excitedly.“ I started that rumor like three weeks ago! And you’ve heard it six times already? I am awesome.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
The King sighed. “Sam, ever since the day Morgan brought you to the castle, I knew there was something special about you. It had nothing to do with your magic or whatever Morgan thought you would one day be. It had to do with the size of your heart. You have so much to give to people and I think you sometimes hide it behind your wit and words. I want you to find that someone who makes you feel complete, who allows you to let your guard down and just be.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
You’re alive, aren’t you? That’s more than I would have thought when I first met you.” “That’s… comforting,” I said. “Is it? Wasn’t meant to be. Simple recitation of fact.” “Always a pleasure, Randall.” “I wouldn’t go that far. I thought there was a good chance you would have blown yourself up by the time you turned fifteen.” “I almost did,” I said. “Several times.” “I still remember the day when Morgan told me about you. It was the day I first got an ulcer.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
I had wished upon them as a child and had wished upon them as an adult. It was upon these stars that I had rested my hopes and dreams, my anger and frustrations. I wished because as a child, that's what you're supposed to do. You don't know any better. I wished because as an adult, sometimes you don't know what else to do. You know better, but you don't care.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
He took his hand and something sparked in the handshake. It coursed up his arm and fluttered in his chest. He gritted his teeth as he tried to keep his face smooth, pleasant, while lightning struck his heart. Reiner looked straight into his eyes, and when Thierry returned his intense gaze, he was bewildered as to where and when he was. The breath he didn’t need to take caught in his dry throat. The lights around him seemed to dim, leaving only the two of them illuminated. His muddled mind tried to understand what was happening, but as he groped for answers he found nothing to hold. Like trying to catch water.
Daniel de Lorne (Beckoning Blood (Bonds of Blood #1))
Do some magic,” Ryan whispered to me, right in my ear. “Slowly. So I can watch.” “When we get out of here, I’m going to do so much magic all over you,” I told him. “You’re going to be covered in it.” At that moment, I really wished I’d been born mute and had never set eyes on Ryan Foxheart. “Make it stop!” Gary wailed. “Yeah. Cover me in your magic.” Ryan was blushing so hard, I thought his face was about to explode. “I want to stop talking. You have no idea how much I want to stop talking.” He leaned closer and I could feel his breath on my face. It smelled of corn and eroticism. “Um,” Eloise said. “Maybe you guys could—” We ignored her completely. “I’m going to do so many spells,” I said, because it seemed impossible for me to stop. “You won’t even believe how many spells I can do. Flora Bora Slam, motherfucker.” Our lips were inches apart. “I want you to Flora Bora Slam me,” Ryan said and I just choked. “Therapy,” Gary said. “I’m going to need so much therapy. It’s like watching cows mating and it’s wet and sticky and uncomfortable but I can’t look away because I’m worried some of it is going to get on me.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
Picnic, Lightning It is possible to be struck by a meteor or a single-engine plane while reading in a chair at home. Safes drop from rooftops and flatten the odd pedestrian mostly within the panels of the comics, but still, we know it is possible, as well as the flash of summer lightning, the thermos toppling over, spilling out on the grass. And we know the message can be delivered from within. The heart, no valentine, decides to quit after lunch, the power shut off like a switch, or a tiny dark ship is unmoored into the flow of the body’s rivers, the brain a monastery, defenseless on the shore. This is what I think about when I shovel compost into a wheelbarrow, and when I fill the long flower boxes, then press into rows the limp roots of red impatiens— the instant hand of Death always ready to burst forth from the sleeve of his voluminous cloak. Then the soil is full of marvels, bits of leaf like flakes off a fresco, red-brown pine needles, a beetle quick to burrow back under the loam. Then the wheelbarrow is a wilder blue, the clouds a brighter white, and all I hear is the rasp of the steel edge against a round stone, the small plants singing with lifted faces, and the click of the sundial as one hour sweeps into the next.
Billy Collins (Picnic, Lightning)
And, then, like a second bolt of lightning, it struck me with dead certainty what would happen if the children disappeared, if they died, if they simply inconvenienced everyone around us. I would be blamed. And I would be sent back home. And just like all those years ago, when I’d been kicked out of Iron Mountain, everyone would sit there blaming me, wondering why I thought I was anything other than what I was. Madison? That would be the end of our relationship. She had asked me to do this one thing for her . . . well, this second thing for her. If I couldn’t do it, if I failed her, why would she need me? I would lose her again. I had never let her down before. I felt my heart stutter in my chest. I couldn’t let this happen
Kevin Wilson (Nothing to See Here)
The great oak tree had stood on a hill over the Hudson, in a lonely spot on the Taggart estate. Eddie Willers, aged seven, liked to come and look at that tree. It had stood there for hundreds of years, and he thought it would always stand there. Its roots clutched the hill like a fist with fingers sunk into the soil, and he thought that if a giant were to seize it by the top, he would not be able to uproot it, but would swing the hill and the whole of the earth with it, like a ball at the end of a string. He felt safe in the oak tree's presence; it was a thing that nothing could change or threaten; it was his greatest symbol of strength. One night, lightning struck the oak tree. Eddie saw it next morning. It lay broken in half, and he looked into its trunk as into the mouth of a black tunnel. The trunk was only an empty shell; its heart had rotted away long ago; there was nothing inside-just a thin gray dust that was being dispersed by the whim of the faintest wind. The living power had gone, and the shape it left had not been able to stand without it.
Ayn Rand (Atlas Shrugged)
Ungh,” Ryan said. “That shit is so hot.” Everyone turned to stare at him. He was bright red. “I said that out loud, didn’t I? Dammit.” “What?” I squeaked. “When you do magic, it turns me on,” Ryan said, shaking his head frantically. “Ah gods. I can’t—stop. Just stop. Ahhh, I get erections when you cast spells. Oh shit.” “Sweet molasses,” I managed to say. “This… this is not what I thought was going to happen today,” Gary said. “What you think happen?” Tiggy asked. “I thought Ryan and Sam would continue to ignore how much they want to bone each other and we would all be suffering in silence because Sam won’t pull his head out of his ass to see that Ryan wants to eat said ass for dinner.” “I do,” Ryan said through gritted teeth. “For breakfast, even. And lunch. And a midnight snack. Especially when you do magic.” “You have a magic kink?” I said, because that was the only thing I could focus on. “Yes. But only for you. Your magic gets me hard,” he said, looking like he wished he could be anywhere but where he was. “When you do anything, I get hard, really. Even your ridiculous sex puns. You remember when you wrapped those Dark wizards in stone at the restaurant?” “Yeah,” I managed to say. “I wanted to tell you that you gave me an e-rock-tion.” He bent over and banged his forehead against the table. “Why, why, why did I say that out loud? Please. Someone. Anyone. Kill me.” “Sex puns,” I breathed. “Knight Delicious Face said a sex pun.” “There it is again!” he exclaimed. “Knight Delicious Face. What is that?” “You’re a knight,” I said. “And your face is delicious.” “You think I’m delicious?” he said, suddenly shy. “Oh my gods,” Gary moaned. “This is so awkward I can’t even stand it. I physically hurt from how awkward this is. I don’t even care that we’re apparently in mortal danger. I just don’t want to listen to you two flirt anymore. Eloise? Yoo-hoo, Eloise? If you’re going to kill us, can you please do it now? I can’t take this anymore.
T.J. Klune (The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1))
His hands came to her wrists, squeezed reflexively, before he got quickly to his feet. "You're mixing things up." Panic arrowed straight into his heart. "I told you sex complicates things." "Yes,you did.And of course since you're the only man I've been with, how could I knew the difference between sex and love? Then again, that doesn't take into account that I'm a smart and self-aware woman, and I know the reason you're the only man I've been with is that you're the only man I've loved.Brian..." She stepped toward him, humor flashing into her eyes when he stepped back. "I've made up my mind.You know how stubborn I am." "I train your father's horses." "So what? My mother groomed them." "That's a different matter." "Why? Oh, because she's a woman.How foolish of me not to realize we can't possibly love each other, build a life with each other.Now if you owned Royal Meadows and I worked here, then it would be all right." "Stop making me sound ridiculous." "I can't." She spread her hands. "You are ridiculous.I love you anyway. Really, I tried to approach it sensibly.I like doing things in a structured order that makes a beeline for the goal.But..." She shrugged, smiled. "It just doesn't want to work that way with you.I look at you and my heart,well, it just insists on taking over.I love you so much,Brian. Can't you tell me? Can't you look at me and tell me?" He skimmed his fingertips over the bruise high on her temple. He wanted to tend to it, to her. "If I did there'd be no going back." "Coward." She watched the heat flash into his eyes,and thought how lovely it was to know him so well. "You won't push me into a corner." Now she laughed. "Watch me," she invited and proceeded to back him up against the steps. "I've figured a lot of things out today,Brian.You're scared of me-of what you feel for me. You were the one always pulling back when we were in public, shifting aside when I'd reach for you.It hurt me." The idea quite simply appalled him. "I never meant to hurt you." "No,you couldn't.How could I help but fall for you? A hard head and a soft heart.It's irresistable. Still, it did hurt. But I thought it was just the snob in you.I didn't realize it was nerves." "I'm not a snob, or a coward." "Put your arms around me.Kiss me. Tell me." "Damn it." he grabbed her shoulders, then simply held on, unable to push her back or draw her in. "It was the first time I saw you, the first instant. You walked in the room and my heart stopped. Like it had been struck by lightning.I was fine until you walked into the room." Her knees wanted to buckle.Hard head, soft heart, and here, suddenly, a staggering sweep of romance. "Why didn't you tell me? Why did you make me wait?" "I thought I'd get over it." "Get over it?" Her brow arched up. "Like a head cold?" "Maybe." He set her aside, paced away to stare out at the hills. Keeley closed her eyes, let the breeze ruffle her hair, cool her cheeks. When the calm descended, she opened her eyes and smiled. "A good strong head cold's tough to shake off.
Nora Roberts (Irish Rebel (Irish Hearts, #3))