Summer Allergies Quotes

Winter was nothing but a season of snow; spring, allergies; and summer...It was the worst. That was swimsuit season.

In the first summer of the Iraqi war, on the crabby, sweaty second day of a blackout that shut down the northeast’s power grid, I stood in line for questionable foodstuffs in my dark neighborhood deli. It reeked of souring milk. An annoyingly upbeat fellow-shopper chirped, “Cheer up, everybody, we’re part of history!” Maybe because I was suffering the effects of allergy eyes brought on the night before by trying to read by the light of lilac-scented candles about a political murder committed around the time of the Spanish-American War, I snapped at him. “Sir,” I said, “except for the people who were there that one day they discovered the polio vaccine, being part of history is rarely a good idea. History is one war after another with a bunch of murders and natural disasters in between.

Just recently, in the summer of 2009, a Finnish report published in the journal Clinical and Experimental Allergy stated that taking vitamin D during pregnancy was inversely associated with asthma and allergic rhinitis (inflammation of the nasal passages) in five-year-old children. That is to say, the women who took vitamin D during pregnancy were less likely to have children suffering from allergies and asthma by the time they were five years old.

I confessed that they were too hard to follow, and the summer before my sophomore fall, she sought to fully transform Yale’s food-allergy plan. With her credentials from Boston Children’s Hospital, she arranged meetings with our head chefs and supervisors, getting gluten-free cereals and bagels in dining halls, adding “gluten” labels on every dish’s information cards. It was unbelievable. It was impressive. Watching her make calls, I could see her eyes smile with the smallest hint of pride.

My doctor has given me as strong an antihistamine as she is allowed to prescribe, but even that does nothing for the itching and swelling. The moment a grain of pollen enters the keep, I begin to tomato, and after two minutes of being exposed to the Ejaculateum Arboratoeaea, I am lying on the ground with my tongue lolling out of the side of my mouth. I am heartily glad that the trees and plants are still interested in copulatory activities; I only wish they would be so good as to keep their sperm away from my face. Do not pretend that pollen is anything else; it transfers haploid male genetic material and sullies the bedclothes unmercifully.

I am heartily glad that the trees and plants are still interested in copulatory activities; I only wish they would be so good as to keep their sperm away from my face. Do not pretend that pollen is anything else; it transfers haploid male genetic material and sullies the bedclothes unmercifully.

I bit my lip to keep from saying, You have allergies, not swine flu.

He called me, sneezing like crazy, all stuffed up and pitiful. “Can you come over and hang out with me?” he asked, blowing his nose. “And can you bring more Kleenex? And orange juice?” I bit my lip to keep from saying, You have allergies, not swine flu.