Stapler Quotes

I picked up the nearest weapon I could lay my hands on: a stapler. I lifted it, going for “menacing.” I admit it lacked a certain elegance, but hey. It was worth a shot. David placed his hand on my arm and pushed it back down. “What?” “Just . . . that’s embarrassing for all of us,” he replied.

The paper, the stapler, the staples, the tape. It makes me sick. Physical things. Forty years of loving someone becomes staples and tape.

Thank Artemis, it is you! That little scar on your lip--you tried to eat a stapler when you were two!" ... Hedge nodded like he approved of Jason's taste. "Staplers--excellent source of iron.

Will someone please tell me why you all call me 'Sparky'?" she burst out in frustration. "And if I get stabbed one more time tonight I'm going to lose it!" she added, rounding on Jason, who was sneaking up behind her holding a stapler.

(Desk sex can be very, very good, but it’s important to remove the staplers first.)

Staplers--- Excellent source of iron

I just met my new boss,” she groaned into the phone. “Or more specifically, I threw an industrial-strength stapler at his head.

I wasn't sure I could make it through another hour of his company without throwing my stapler at his head.

She inched closer to him. "I intrigue you?" "You know you do," he replied boldly, his eyes burning into hers. Wow-things were suddenly heating up fast. He wondered if they would have sex right there on her desk.Somebody better move that stapler. With a coy look, Taylor stood up to whisper in Jason's ear. "then I think you're going to find this next part really intriging," she said breathlessly. He gazed down at her-he like the sound of that-and raised one eybrow expectantly as taylor grinned wickedly and- Slammed the office door right in his face. For a moment, Jason could only stand there in the hallway with his nose pressed against the cold wood of her door. After a few seconds, he knocked politely. Taylor whipped open the door, unamused. Jason grinned at her. "I just gotta ask: where did you get the whole 'all the cute girls run around naked' thing?

I gripped the stapler even harder and felt like a fool planning to battle a crazy man with a stapler that even, I suddenly remembered, contained no staples. Well, strike that line of defense.

Here is a drawing of a stapler:

From now on start asking yourself WHY you feel a certain way, WHAT made you perform a certain action, and HOW you could do things differently. The information you discover is powerful because it helps you to discover patterns and in turn use your mind productively and efficiently. After all, your mind is your most powerful tool, but it’s not useful if you don’t know how to use it. It’s like trying to fix a printer with a stapler: it doesn’t work. Trust me, I’ve tried.

What does it feel like?” he asked. “What does what feel like?” Peter thought for a moment. “Being at the top.” Josie reached across him for another packet of material and fed it into the stapler. She did three of these, and Peter was certain that she was going to ignore him, but then she spoke. “Like if you take one wrong step,” she said, “you’re going to fall.

Be the Mick Jagger of the mailroom, the Warren Buffet of bookkeeping and the Bono of stapler selling.

That didn't sound much like a date, Rosie thought. Useful wasn't a word you used about a date. It was a word you used about a stapler.

Yeah, well, if he tries, I’m going to burn his office down to his red stapler.

I had a sudden violent daydream of murdering him with a stapler as I started the coffee machine in the kitchen.

So you have a choice. You can leave quietly or I can call the police after I wang you with my stapler.

(A revolver is) just a tool, really, like stapler. A stapler that punch through a person. Pin them. Drive blunt metal through flesh and bone.

Gee, what a happy place. It was like Disneyland with staplers and toner cartridges. ~ Thread Reckoning

She took the posters downtown that afternoon. She filled a rolling suitcase with them ... she took a stapler. And a box of staples. And hope. I think of those things. The paper, the stapler, the staples, the tape, the hope. It makes me sick. Physical things. Forty years of loving someone becomes staples and hop.

Because I just don't really care about what the liquid in my glass says about me anymore. I'd like to tell you it's because sobriety cured my need for specialness. I'd like to tell you I invented the stapler and can start fires with my mind. But no.

Other girls carried tasers or pepper spray for safety. Rosa had bought herself a stapler in a hardware store on the corner of Baltic and Clinton Streets. Her thinking was simple. An electric shock is nasty but leaves no marks. With her method, though, she could put two or three staples into any attacker’s body. Then he’d have to stop and decide whether to tangle with her or start getting the staples out of his skin.

He pulled out a short-barreled pistol from the drawer and placed it on the desktop. It was not what he was looking for. The pistol might have been a stapler for all he noticed.

That little scar on your lip—you tried to eat a stapler when you were two!

My gods! She told me you were dead!” She gripped Jason’s face and seemed to be examining everything about it. “Thank Artemis, it is you. That little scar on your lip—you tried to eat a stapler when you were two!

Welcome to my dungeon. It's not much," Linc said as he cleaned off a chair for her. "But… it's not much." He dumped the files and books on the floor. "The nice thing about starting at the bottom is, you can't get any lower." "If I'm a good boy, I'll get my own stapler

In the self-defense class, our teacher taught us that if we couldn't imagine doing something- cracking an assailant in the head with a stapler, opening up a can of pepper spray on an attacker, digging our keys into the eyes of a would-be rapist- we wouldn't be able to act in a real crisis. Wielding the stapler, the pepper spray, and the keys, our teacher taught us the power of visualization, and I learned to imagine in advance what I might be called upon to do in an emergency... I have my keys in my hand and I am holding them like a claw. Let's turn this motherfucking system around.

Lucas had the ability to charm the knickers off of a fucking stapler,

It was an ancient thing, a Nokia, black-and-grey, with about as many functions as a bottle opener. You could no more take a photo with it than send an e-mail with a stapler.

His pencils, his scissors, his ruler, his stapler, his calendar--the most mundane objects became somehow radiant by being his.

Your beast come out?” the King said. “Nah, I sneezed.” Black brows lifted over the wraparounds. “Really? I didn’t know your nose had that kind of firepower.” “It doesn’t,” V answered as he took out a hand-rolled. “He had an oopsie.” “Do you need gun practice—” “You would have sneezed, too,” Rhage interrupted the King. “And no, I don’t need to go to the range. Well, unless Lassiter has a target on his ass—” “I’ll volunteer the angel right here, right now.” V parked it on the far side of the desk. “And can I be the one with the stapler, pinning the tail on his donkey? ’Cuz I’ll tell you right now, I’ma hit that Stanley until the thing jams.

The kid looked at me as if I’d just told a joke about his mother. ‘I don’t know, Mr Dunne, I’m sure they’re getting the details right now. The point is, your wife is safe.’ Hurray. Kid stole my line. I spotted Rand and Marybeth through the doorway of the room where we’d given our first press conference six weeks ago. They were leaning in to each other, as always, Rand kissing the top of Marybeth’s head, Marybeth nuzzling him back, and I felt such a keen sense of outrage that I almost threw a stapler at them. You two worshipful, adoring assholes created that thing down the hall and set her loose on the world. Lo, how jolly, what a perfect monster! And do they get punished? No, not a single person had come forth to question their characters; they’d experienced nothing but an outpouring of love and support, and Amy would be restored to them and everyone would love her more. My wife was an insatiable sociopath before. What would she become now? Step carefully, Nick, step very carefully.

Sonnet of Human Resources There is no blue collar, no white collar, just honor. And honor is defined by character not collar. There is no CEO, no janitor, just people. Person's worth lies, not in background, but behavior. Designation is reference to expertise, not existence. Respect is earned through rightful action, not label. Designation without humanity is resignation of humanity, For all labels without love cause nothing but trouble. The term human resources is a violation of human rights. For it designates people as possession of a company. Computers are resources, staplers are resources, but people, Aren't resources, but the soul of all company and society. I'm not saying, you oughta rephrase it all in a civilized way. But at the very least, it's high time with hierarchy we do away.

On top of work woes, four times this month he’d been summoned in to see Mrs. Mudford, Amanda’s kindergarten teacher, who most recently had threatened to report him simply because, in a cloud of exhaustion and depression, he’d inadvertently packed his gin flask where Amanda’s milk thermos was supposed to go. He’d also sent a stapler instead of a sandwich, a script instead of a napkin, and some champagne truffles that time they were out of bread.

Snacks at sleepovers are a must. Try this one next time your parents forget to stock the snack cupboard. Supplies: brown paper lunch bag stapler measuring cup microwave Ingredients: ¼ cup popcorn kernels 2 tbsp brown sugar 2 tbsp chocolate chips 2 tbsp butter or margarine pinch of salt Pour the popcorn kernels into a brown paper lunch bag then fold the top of the bag ¼ of an inch, twice. Secure two staples (trust me, I Googled it!) at the folded part to seal the bag shut. Lay the bag flat in the microwave and cook on HIGH for about 1:45 (one minute and forty-five seconds, people!). Each microwave is different, though, so you may need to adjust the time. Meanwhile, add the brown sugar, chocolate chips, butter/margarine and salt to a microwave-safe measuring cup. Cook on HIGH for about 15 seconds or until the gooey buttery-chocolaty mixture is melted. Mix well with a fork then pour it over the popcorn.

Subject of Thought Number of Times Thought Occurred per Year (in descending order) L. 580.0 Family 400.0 Brushing tongue 150.0 Earplugs 100.0 Bill-paying 52.0 Panasonic three-wheeled vacuum cleaner, greatness of 45.0 Sunlight makes you cheerful 40.0 Traffic frustration 38.0 Penguin books, all 35.0 Job, should I quit? 34.0 Friends, don't have any 33.0 Marriage, a possibility? 32.0 Vending machines 31.0 Straws don't unsheath well 28.0 Shine on moving objects 25.0 McCartney more talented than Lennon? 23.0 Friends smarter, more capable than I am 19.0 Paper-towel dispensers 19.0 "What oft was thought, but ne'er" etc. 18.0 People are very dissimilar 16.0 Trees, beauty of 15.0 Sidewalks 15.0 Friends are unworthy of me 15.0 Indentical twins separated at birth, studies of traits 14.0 Intelligence, going fast 14.0 Wheelchair ramps, their insane danger 14.0 Urge to kill 13.0 Escalator invention 12.0 People are very similar 12.0 "Not in my backyard" 11.0 Straws float now 10.0 DJ, would I be happy as one? 9.0 "If you can't get out of it, get into it" 9.0 Pen, felt-tip 9.0 Gasoline, nice smell of 8.0 Pen, ballpoint 8.0 Stereo systems 8.0 Fear of getting mugged again 7.0 Staplers 7.0 "Roaches check in, but they don't check out" 6.0 Dinner roll, image of 6.0 Shoes 6.0 Bags 5.0 Butz, Earl 4.0 Sweeping, brooms 4.0 Whistling, yodel trick 4.0 "You can taste it with your eyes" 4.0 Dry-cleaning fluid, smell of 3.0 Zip-lock tops 2.0 Popcorn 1.0 Birds regurgitate food and feed young with it 0.5 Kant, Immanuel 0.5

friendship is like a stapler,when it is used to bind to pages the pages are bound tightly but when the stapler is used to remove the pin the pages are left torn forever

We’d seen firsthand how the man handled a crisis. If Marcia decided suddenly to brandish a stapler in a half-threatening manner, he’d fumble with his Motorola and forget his name.

As they walked into his office, Lori immediately took in the mess on his desk and the floor where the papers and stapler had fallen that morning, along with the fact that the desk was now sitting at a strange angle in the room. It couldn’t have been more clear what he and Valentina had been up to. “First woman you’ve ever really cared about, and the best you can do is drag her in here to have a quickie on your desk?” Lori shook her head in disgust. “No wonder she’s still way up on the fence about you.” Damn it, he hated that he had to agree with his sister’s annoying analysis of the situation.

Bizarre and Surprising Insights—Consumer Behavior Insight Organization Suggested Explanation7 Guys literally drool over sports cars. Male college student subjects produce measurably more saliva when presented with images of sports cars or money. Northwestern University Kellogg School of Management Consumer impulses are physiological cousins of hunger. If you buy diapers, you are more likely to also buy beer. A pharmacy chain found this across 90 days of evening shopping across dozens of outlets (urban myth to some, but based on reported results). Osco Drug Daddy needs a beer. Dolls and candy bars. Sixty percent of customers who buy a Barbie doll buy one of three types of candy bars. Walmart Kids come along for errands. Pop-Tarts before a hurricane. Prehurricane, Strawberry Pop-Tart sales increased about sevenfold. Walmart In preparation before an act of nature, people stock up on comfort or nonperishable foods. Staplers reveal hires. The purchase of a stapler often accompanies the purchase of paper, waste baskets, scissors, paper clips, folders, and so on. A large retailer Stapler purchases are often a part of a complete office kit for a new employee. Higher crime, more Uber rides. In San Francisco, the areas with the most prostitution, alcohol, theft, and burglary are most positively correlated with Uber trips. Uber “We hypothesized that crime should be a proxy for nonresidential population.…Uber riders are not causing more crime. Right, guys?” Mac users book more expensive hotels. Orbitz users on an Apple Mac spend up to 30 percent more than Windows users when booking a hotel reservation. Orbitz applies this insight, altering displayed options according to your operating system. Orbitz Macs are often more expensive than Windows computers, so Mac users may on average have greater financial resources. Your inclination to buy varies by time of day. For retail websites, the peak is 8:00 PM; for dating, late at night; for finance, around 1:00 PM; for travel, just after 10:00 AM. This is not the amount of website traffic, but the propensity to buy of those who are already on the website. Survey of websites The impetus to complete certain kinds of transactions is higher during certain times of day. Your e-mail address reveals your level of commitment. Customers who register for a free account with an Earthlink.com e-mail address are almost five times more likely to convert to a paid, premium-level membership than those with a Hotmail.com e-mail address. An online dating website Disclosing permanent or primary e-mail accounts reveals a longer-term intention. Banner ads affect you more than you think. Although you may feel you've learned to ignore them, people who see a merchant's banner ad are 61 percent more likely to subsequently perform a related search, and this drives a 249 percent increase in clicks on the merchant's paid textual ads in the search results. Yahoo! Advertising exerts a subconscious effect. Companies win by not prompting customers to think. Contacting actively engaged customers can backfire—direct mailing financial service customers who have already opened several accounts decreases the chances they will open more accounts (more details in Chapter 7).

If she lives here, she is expected to speak the language, Eric says. Immediately, he apologizes. Immediately, I put the stapler down. But I can't forgive him. That thing you said, I have heard from other people as well. So I don't need to hear it from you. Who am I really trying to forgive? That thing he says I have also thought as well. I have probably even said it. Her poor English is not for a lack of trying. She goes to ESL. She goes to reading groups. She is frustrated-- a former pharmacist with a great memory but that memory is no longer there. Yet how this must have felt: in high school, I walk ten feet in front of her whenever we are out in public. She asks for help and I pretend not to hear her. Then when she tells the neighbor there are three panthers in the house, I am mortified. I correct her. Only later do I see humor in it.

A small incident like a stapler running out of staples doesn’t normally cause the collapse of our entire universe. After a skipped beat, the connections knit together again, and we carry on. But sometimes a more comprehensive failure occurs — and it is possible that an empty stapler could be the catalyst for questioning my entire career and path in life.

Living alone is not so easy sometimes, coming home to a room where nothing has changed and everything belongs to you. Sometimes I hide things then put them out of my mind. When I find the stapler behind the couch a month from now, I'll be surprised and feel less lonely.

I noticed what was inside the box Alexander was carrying. Office supplies. And then I realized that the office Alexander had been exiting wasn’t his. It belonged to Nathan Kagan, the dean of Survival Skills. “Is all that stuff yours?” “Er . . . Kind of.” It was suddenly evident that Alexander hadn’t been embarrassed about running into me; he’d been embarrassed because I’d caught him swiping office supplies. “Kagan filched plenty from me over the years. I can’t even count how many bullets I lent him. But was he there when I needed someone to stand up for me? No. He threw me to the wolves. So at the very least, he owes me a stapler.

Snacks at sleepovers are a must. Try this one next time your parents forget to stock the snack cupboard. Supplies: brown paper lunch bag stapler measuring cup microwave Ingredients: ¼ cup popcorn kernels 2 tbsp brown sugar 2 tbsp chocolate chips 2 tbsp butter or margarine pinch of salt Pour the popcorn kernels into a brown paper lunch bag then fold the top of the bag ¼ of an inch, twice. Secure two staples (trust me, I Googled it!) at the folded part to seal the bag shut. Lay the bag flat in the microwave and cook on HIGH for about 1:45 (one minute and forty-five seconds, people!). Each microwave is different, though, so you may need to adjust the time. Meanwhile, add the brown sugar, chocolate chips, butter/margarine and salt to a microwave-safe measuring cup. Cook on HIGH for about 15 seconds or until the gooey buttery-chocolaty mixture is melted. Mix well with a fork then pour it over the popcorn. Toss like a salad and ENJOY!

I brought her a dead glitter rabbit,” he said. “Does that count?” Flynn rolled his eyes. “Of course you did.” “Hey,” Xander said. “Don’t make fun. Her panther ate some. In pantherland, it means she thinks I’m fuckable.” He opened the stapler and squeezed it, shooting a staple across the desk.

Get your hand off me,” Karsyn growls, accent surging back in full force. Claude doesn’t listen and just like that, Karsyn flips open the stapler and slams it down on Claude’s hand, leaving a staple behind. Marcus lets out this strange little noise of delight that makes me stare at him in wonder.

Who cares about your humor? How do you think my mother feels right now, trying to get to know you? That is not my problem. If she lives here, she is expected to speak the language. The moment I hear him say that, I reach for the nearest heavy thing. A stapler. Perhaps I was planning to staple his lips together so that he could feel even more limited.

If she lives here, she is expected to speak the language, Eric says. Immediately, he apologizes. Immediately, I put the stapler down. But I can’t forgive him. That thing you said, I have heard from other people as well. So I don’t need to hear it from you.

I’m starting to think I should have stuck with my original lunch plans.” He releases an amused huff. “Missing your stapler and office plants already?” “Not really. I just prefer the company of inanimate objects over you.” “Better conversation?” He counters drily. “Something like that. At least when they ignore me, I can attribute it to their inability to talk back.

Of course you don't get it," he said. "You and Yaya, you've always felt trapped here. But I don't want to graduate." He rolled a banana against the table with his palm. "I've spent my whole life reading beautiful books and watching beautiful movies, dreaming that there was some real place out there where I would fit in and be beautiful, too. And now I'm here. And I don't to leave. I don't want to get an ugly job in an ugly office full of shit like staplers and fax machines. I don't want to write memos. I don't want us all to move far away from each other and grow up and forget to call. I don't to get fat. I don't want to be tired. I don't know. I just...sometimes I can't imagine anything good happening to me. After Catherine.

Who’s going to be my ultimate match? Are you going to be a laid-back surfer boy who’s lived his whole life in Malibu? Are you going to be a teacher with a thick stapler in your pants?” I giggle to myself. “Maybe a doctor who loves doing pelvic exams. Wouldn’t mind one of those.

Is it possible to fall head over heels in love with someone and then the next week want to bash their brains in with your pretty white and gold stapler?

I went to the stapler and ran my hand over it. Just cold metal. A practical tool, but it meant everything to her. Because she’d fought and freed herself with that damn stapler. It had grounded her in a place where they tried to rip her away from herself and some other fuckbucket tried to help himself to her.

And no, I don’t need to go to the range. Well, unless Lassiter has a target on his ass—” “I’ll volunteer the angel right here, right now.” V parked it on the far side of the desk. “And can I be the one with the stapler, pinning the tail on his donkey? ’Cuz I’ll tell you right now, I’ma hit that Stanley until the thing jams.

label maker plus extra cartridge tape and batteries pad of lined paper, pad of graph paper pens, pencils, felt-tip pens, Sharpies®, and highlighters office necessities like a stapler, tape, paper clips, scissors, labels, calculator, sticky notes, etc. box cutter, letter opener zip ties, cable ties, or cable clips tape measure and small tools (hammer, screw driver, level) assortment of nails and picture-hanging supplies Moving

The term human resources is a violation of human rights. for it designates people as possession of a company. Computers are resources, staplers are resources, but people aren't resources, but the soul of all company and society.

i want to make simba watch as i make a cum tribute to his dead father’s photo and, once finished, sticking the now-soiled and moist photo to simba’s dumb face with a stapler. once stapled on, i will force him to lick the excess semen and fluids off of his father’s rotting face and when he cries, i will catch every tear until i have an entire bucket worth of it, and i will then proceed to give simba a painful and scolding hot enema made of his own tears and saliva, and i will then proceed to do this every day until he begs me to kill him. i will make him think he is finally free from this torment, but he will be shocked to find that it is a water gun filled with his father’s drained blood. he will be staying with me for a while. there is no end.

My hand throbs with leftover pain. I hit something. Something. Not someone. The flat of my palm, smacking against Ms. Benitez's desk. Now I remember. Her stapler jumped. So did she. "Don't talk about my sister." I blacked out. Went into a fugue state. Sank deep into the static, where sound and light and memory could not find me. [...] "Does this happen to you a lot?" I think of vomiting at Mom's bringing up Lola. Of the rage that picked me up when Mark said "Jihadi Jane." The time that vanished when I read the YouTube comments. And other times in my past. Time when I go away, but I'm still here.

My hand throbs with leftover pain. I hit something. Something. Not someone. The flat of my palm, smacking against Ms. Benitez's desk. Now I remember. Her stapler jumped. So did she. "Don't talk about my sister." I blacked out. Went into a fugue state. Sank deep into the static, where sound and light and memory could not find me.

I storm out of the office, past the protestors, covered in paint head to toe. I don't have a job, but my God I have my own self-respect. I might not have the love of my life but I can no longer live in fear of thrown staplers hitting my head. This is the right thing. I’m almost sure. Either that or I’m having a nervous breakdown.

holding it secure, sort of. I held out the posters and slid them through the opening. “I thought you might want these.” She took them and then placed her face closer to the opening—I could see that she’d been crying. “They took my stapler.” “Yep, well . . . You have to have a concealed/carry permit for those things here in Wyoming.” She smiled. “I nailed him, didn’t I?” “Stapled him, to be exact. Don’t feel so bad about it. I did something like that in Vietnam once.

Thank Artemis, it is you. That little scar on your lip—you tried to eat a stapler when you were two!” Leo laughed. “Seriously?” Hedge nodded like he approved of Jason’s taste. “Staplers—excellent source of iron.

Office and Classroom Tools—Have the child cut with scissors; use a stapler and hole puncher; draw with crayons and chalk; paint with brushes, feathers, sticks, and eyedroppers; squeeze glue onto paper in letters or designs, sprinkle sparkles on the glue, and shake off the excess; and wrap boxes with brown paper, tape, and string. MOTOR PLANNING Jumping from a Table—Place a gym mat beside a low table and encourage the child to jump. After each landing, stick tape on the mat to mark the spot. Encourage the child to jump farther each time. Walking Like Animals—Encourage the child to lumber like a bear, on all fours; a crab, from side to side on all fours; a turtle, creeping; a snake, crawling; an inchworm, by stretching flat and pulling her knees toward her chest; an ostrich, while grasping her ankles; a duck, squatting; a frog, squatting and jumping; a kangaroo or bunny, jumping; a lame dog, with an “injured” leg; a gorilla, bending her knees; a horse, galloping. Playground Games—Remember Simon Says, Ring-Around-the-Rosy, The Hokey-Pokey, London Bridge, Shoo Fly, and Mother, May I? Insy-Outsy—Teach the child to get in and out of clothes, the front door, and the car. With a little help, the child may become able to perform these tasks independently, even if it takes a long time!