Sailors Funny Quotes

The disc, being flat, has no real horizon. Any adventurous sailor who got funny ideas from staring at eggs and oranges for too long and set out for the antipodes soon learned that the reason why distant ships sometimes looked as though they were disappearing over the edge of the world was that they were disappearing over the edge of the world.

This is Sailor Supergirl,” George says. “She knows all about black holes.

Their vaginas were just ships passing in the night, stopping to pick up every dirty sailor.

It's empty." Duane swore harsh enough to make a sailor blush, calling into question not only the suspect's parentage, but that somehow duck's were involved.

We wouldn't eat an important person like you. Sometimes we'll take a sailor, but —" He shrugged. "— so would you if it was always fish.

You're a dick," Ellison said. "Or, is it just that you suck it?" Aaron knew by the stillness in the room that everyone was awaiting Tony's response. "Both," Tony agreed lightly. "And if you actually had one you might be in trouble, sailor.

Says O'Sullivan to me, "Mr. Fay, I'll have a word wid yeh?" "Certainly," says I; "what can I do for you?" "Sell me your sea- boots, Mr. Fay," says O'Sullivan, polite as can be. "But what will you be wantin' of them?" says I. "'Twill be a great favour," says O'Sullivan. "But it's my only pair," says I; "and you have a pair of your own," says I. "Mr. Fay, I'll be needin' me own in bad weather," says O'Sullivan. "Besides," says I, "you have no money." "I'll pay for them when we pay off in Seattle," says O'Sullivan. "I'll not do it," says I; "besides, you're not tellin' me what you'll be doin' with them." "But I will tell yeh," says O'Sullivan; "I'm wantin' to throw 'em over the side." And with that I turns to walk away, but O'Sullivan says, very polite and seducin'-like, still a-stroppin' the razor, "Mr. Fay," says he, "will you kindly step this way an' have your throat cut?" And with that I knew my life was in danger, and I have come to make report to you, sir, that the man is a violent lunatic.

I am Abdumasi of the House of Abd, master of ships, champion cat gambler, and I challenge you to mortal up-fuckery!

A sailor's wife had chestnuts in her lap And munched and munched and munched. "Give me," quoth I. "Aroint thee, witch," the rump-fed runnion cries.

Trey gave him a mockingly sympathetic look. “You might be an Alpha, but your family will always find a way to play you.” Nick just scowled at him. “I’m glad you find this amusing, Sailor Joe.” It seemed to take a few seconds for the words to sink in, but when they did, Trey spun to snarl at Taryn, “You told him?” She laughed awkwardly. “Of course I didn’t tell him.” In a low voice, she added, “I told Shaya.” While everyone else was doing their best to hide their amusement, Dante was outright laughing his ass off. “A sailor, huh? Didn’t think that role-play was your thing.” Trey glowered at him. “Something funny, Fireman Sam?” The laughing abruptly stopped, and Dante rounded on his mate. “You told him?” Jaime spluttered. “No!” She cleared her throat. “Although I did tell Taryn. And Shaya. And Roni. But I didn’t tell them about the time you—” A large hand clapped over her mouth. “About the time you . . . ?” prodded Nick, grinning. Wincing as Jaime bit into his palm, Dante shook his head. “Nothing.” Shaya snorted at Nick. “You’re not really one to judge, considering you—” Her words were cut off as he kissed her hard.

Taking a deep breath, Sailor decided to lay himself at her feet. "I was imagining the future and thinking of how if everything went according to plan, I'd have a very successful business with a high turnover." He made sure his hands were locked behind Ísa's back--just in case she decided to leave him in her dust a fourth time. "And since I'd be rich, I'd be able to buy houses and other nice things for my family." Ísa frowned. "I don't think your family expects that." "They don't exactly need my largess either," Sailor muttered. "But in my future fantasy, I'm buying everyone fancy cars and houses. Go with it." Ísa's lips twitched. "Okay, big spender. What else is fantasy Sailor doing?" "He's building a ginormous mansion. Swimming pool, tennis court, the works." "Is he hiring a buff personal masseuse named Sven?" "Hell no." He glared at her. "The masseuse is a fifty-year-old forner bodybuilder named Helga. Now, can I carry on?" Pretending to zip up her lips and throw away the key, Ísa made a "go on" motion. "Future Sailor is also creating a huge walk-in closet for you and filling it with designer shoes and clothes. He's giving you everything your heart desires." A flicker of darkness in Ísa's gaze, but she didn't interrupt... though her hands went still on his shoulders. "And there's a tricked-out nursery too," he added. "Plus a private playground for our rug rats." Throat moving, Ísa said, "How many?" It was a husky question. "Seven, I think." "Very funny, mister." "I'm not done." Sailor was the one who swallowed this time. "And in this fantasy house, future Sailor walks in late for dinner again because of a board meeting, and he has a gorgeous, sexy, brilliant wife and adorable children. But his redhead doesn't look at him the same anymore. And it doesn't matter how many shoes he buys her or how many necklaces he gives her, she's never again going to look at him the way she did before he stomped on her heart. Ísa's lower lip began to quiver, but she didn't speak. "I'm so sorry, baby." Sailor cupped her face, made sure she saw the sheer terror he felt at the thought of losing her. "I've been so tied to this idea of becoming a grand success that I forgot what it was all about in the first place--being there for the people I love. Sticking through the good and the bad. Never abandoning them." Silent tears rolled own Ísa's face. "But that great plan of mine?" he said, determined not to give himself any easy outs. "It'd have mean abandoning everyone. How can I be there for anyone when all I do is work? When I shove aside all other commitments? When the people I love hesitate to ask for my time because I'm too tired and too busy?" Using his thumbs, he rubbed away her tears. More splashed onto the backs of his hands, her hurt as hot as acid. "Spitfire, please," he begged, breaking. "I'll let you punch me as many times as you want if you stop crying. With a big red glove. And you can post photos online." Ísa pressed her lips together, blinked rapidly several times. And pretended to punch him with one fist, the touch a butterfly kiss. Catching her hand, he pressed his lips to it. "That's more like my Ísa." He wrapped his arms around her again. And then he told her the most important thing. "I realized that I could become a multimillionaire, but it would mean nothing if my redhead didn't look at me the way she does now, if she expected to have to take care of everything alone like she's always done--because her man was a selfish bastard who was never there." Ísa rubbed her nose against his. "You're being very hard on future Sailor," she whispered, her voice gone throaty. "That dumbass deserves it," Sailor growled. "He was going to put his desire to be a big man above his amazing, smart, loving redhead.

Any adventurous sailors who got funny ideas from staring at eggs and oranges for too long and set out for the antipodes soon learned that the reason why distant ships sometimes looked as though they were disappearing over the edge of the world was that they were disappearing over the edge of the world.

What will you do, my lady?' Moonlight kissed the apple of his cheekbone as he tilted his head once more. 'You have no shadowstone dagger to threaten me with.' 'I don't need a dagger,' I said, my voice thready. 'And I'm not a lady.' His head straightened. 'No, I imagine not, considering you're nude in a lake with an unfamiliar man, whose lip you bit upon meeting, and have seen the bare backs of many sailors. I was only being polite.' My lip curled at the presumed insult. I knew I should let it go. Keep my mouth shut, but I didn't. I hadn't in three years, and my inability to do so had grown and festered into an incurable disease. The kind that provoked further, dangerous recklessness. 'What I am is a Princess who is nude in a lake with an unfamiliar man and has seen the bare backs of men,' I told him, speaking the forbidden. 'And you, with each passing moment, are getting closer to no longer having the ability to see anyone's unmentionable places ever again.

I was surprised he didn't just spit the nails into the wood like Popeye the Sailor Man.

Poor Craw?" Ben retorted. "Poor Rory! Craw and Ari curse worse than a trucker shagging a sailor.