Phil Stutz Quotes

Real change requires you to change your behavior-not just your attitude.

We like to think we react to the world as it is, when really we react to a world that exists in our own minds. This inner world is so powerful, it overwhelms our ability to see reality. John Milton, in Paradise Lost, expressed it this way: “The mind is its own place, and in itself / Can make a Heav’n of Hell, a Hell of Heav’n.

Inner strength comes only to those who move forward in the face of adversity.

There’s a hidden, inner strength that you cannot find unless you push yourself through adversity.

The tool is called “Inner Authority.” This means just what it says. It’s not an authority that comes from the approval of anyone outside you; it’s the authority you can get only when you’re speaking from your inner self.

We’re trained as a society to expect, even demand, immediate gratification. And we have an extraordinary ability to rationalize this weakness. Instead of admitting we’re avoiding pain, we tell ourselves we’re being virtuous; Vinny had convinced himself he was refusing to “sell out.” We end up with a distorted worldview that makes avoidance seem right, even brave and idealistic. This is the worst sin of all—lying to ourselves. It makes change impossible.

Everyone in your life is imperfect, either because of something they’ve done in the past or something they can’t change in the present. Fixating on these things destroys relationships. You need a tool that allows you to accept people despite their flaws.

The great Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung was the first to say that everyone has a Shadow regardless of their accomplishments, talents, or appearance.

Outflow is an infinite, spiritual force that gives of itself without restraint.

The Comfort Zone is supposed to keep your life safe, but what it really does is keep your life small.

Failure, weakness, and vulnerability is like a connector... it connects you to the rest of the world because what you're doing is giving out a signal to the world that says I need you because I can't do this by myself

A sense of purpose doesn’t come from thinking about it. It comes from taking action that moves you toward the future. The moment you do this, you activate a force more powerful than the desire to avoid pain. We call this the “Force of Forward Motion.

When a patient commits to pursuing their potential, it triggers their Life Force, and it’s the Life Force that gives them the vitality to heal themselves. You can bury your symptoms with meds, you can avoid situations that trigger them, but if you want to change yourself in a lasting way, you need to put yourself in forward motion and pursue your potential.

you’re desiring pain so you can shrink it.

adversity is the only way the universe can increase our inner strength.

The truth is, we accomplish nothing without the help of the Source.

To develop courage, you have to give up this illusion of future certainty.

Alas for those that never sing, / But die with all their music in them!

Think of a particularly difficult problem you have in your life right now and then try this: First, think of the problem as a random hardship, occurring in an unthinking universe that doesn’t care about you or your evolution. How does that feel? Now, think of the same problem as a challenge posed by a universe that wants you to evolve and knows that you can. How does that feel? Most

Instead of seeing problems as an expression of a “condition” whose cause was in the past, we needed to see them as catalysts for developing forces that were already present, lying dormant inside us.

We like to think of ourselves as finished products—complete on our own. We’re not. To be whole, we need to stay connected to something beyond ourselves. The constant effort that requires means that a human being can never be more than a work in progress.

What I enjoyed as a therapist wasn’t holding the patient at a distance; it was putting power into my patients’ hands. Teaching them the tools was my way of giving them the ultimate gift—the ability to change their lives. That made it tremendously satisfying each time a tool was fully developed.

The consumer expects a reward for the slightest effort—or better, for no effort at all. He cares only about what he gets from the world, not about what he might add to it. Living on the surface, jumping from thing to thing, his energy is diffused, like milk spreading across a tabletop. He makes no impact on the world; when his time on earth is over, it’s as if he never lived. The creator won’t accept that fate. Everything he does is with the intention of making an impact on the world. His code ensures this: He doesn’t accept the world as he finds it; he brings things into the world that aren’t already there. He doesn’t follow the herd; he sets his own course. He ignores the reactions of others. He resists superficial distractions. He remains focused on his goals even if he has to sacrifice his immediate gratification. Anyone can live by this code, but very few of us do. It means putting your life in the service of higher forces. These forces can’t be found on the surface of life; they’re found in its depths. The creator’s energy must have the singular focus of a drill boring through stone. As difficult as that is, a creator is rewarded many times over for his efforts. You don’t have to be an artist to be a creator. You can add something to the world in any human activity—even the most routine. Your job, your role as a parent, your relationships, your contribution to your community—all become more meaningful when you put your personal stamp on them using higher forces. For

just a bunch of words. He needed to feel that force move him from the inside before he could have any faith in it. As far as I was concerned this visceral experience was precisely what was missing from traditional psychotherapy. Therapy could elicit ideas

The worship of outer success breeds a selfish fixation on achieving your own goals. Inner greatness, on the other hand, develops only when life makes your goals impossible. You are then faced with a personal, private struggle to reconcile your plans with what life has planned for you. You are forced to become selfless in the best sense—to devote your life to something higher than yourself.

It is a tragedy to die with your song unsung.

1. Imagine that you’re surrounded by a warm and loving light. Feel your heart expand far beyond you and become one with this love. As you bring your heart back to its normal size, feel the energy concentrate itself inside your chest. It is an unstoppable, loving force that wants to give itself away.   2. Focus on the person who has triggered your anger. If they are not physically in front of you, visualize them and send all that love within you directly to them. Hold nothing back, just as you would expel a deep breath.  3. Follow the love as it leaves your chest. When it enters the other person at their solar plexus, feel it enter them. Do not just watch. Take action and embrace the sense that you're one with them. You're one with that love. Relax and feel surrounded by that love. It will return all the energy you gave away and fill you up with peace.   You concentrate, transmit the force, and allow it to sink into the individual who has wronged you as well as feeling it yourself. Through this you transmit love from a higher place in our world, a higher force. You accept the injustice and hold the power to move on. No one can stop you now. If you're struggling, picture the person without a face to allow you to focus on the task instead of that person. With the tool of Active Love, you disarm your target from holding any power over you and your life… That’s true freedom

If you want to go back to school, start with a single class at night and see if that feels like the right choice. If you want to lose twenty pounds, start by skipping dessert at your next meal. If you’re looking for a spiritual community, start by asking those around you what works for them. Focusing on huge, symbolic victories—like switching suddenly to a crash diet—will lead you to quit after a few defeats.

...pick a whole area of life that you’ve always found difficult. The only requirement is that you feel helpless, stopped by something inside you. Notice the place that you get stuck —at that moment Part X has appeared. Feel its presence around you. Say to yourself, “This is Part X.” We call this process “labeling.” You’re learning to recognize the unique qualities that identify your personal Part X. As simple as it is, it’s a crucial building block for everything that will come later.

One of its most effective strategies—and biggest lies—is to tell you that only large, dramatic actions count. That’s the opposite of the truth. The highest energies enter through the smallest actions. The importance of small steps is that they can be repeated over and over, creating a nonstop channel for the Life Force.

Fear is almost always linked to an image you have of something terrible happening in the future.

Necessary pain is the kind you must go through to achieve your goals.

Pain avoidance is a powerful habit. You get immediate relief when you defer something painful. The penalty—helpless regret at a life you wasted—won’t come until far in the future. This is why most people can’t move forward and live life to the fullest.

Real change requires you to change your behavior—not just your attitude.

Elige algo que odies: viajar, conocer gente nueva, las reuniones familiares… ¿Cómo organizas tu vida para poder evitarlo? Imagínate que esas pautas son un lugar donde te escondes: es tu zona de confort. ¿Qué sensación te produce?

human beings can never be made happy by the material world. We are spiritual beings and can be emotionally healthy only when we are in touch with a higher world.

Both the problem and the higher forces that solve it come from the same source—the Force of Evolution. These two elements are part of one system, designed to transform you into a creator. But there’s a third ingredient, and it’s one the universe cannot supply. That ingredient is your free will; specifically, your will to use tools. The choice—evolve or stay the same—is yours.

No matter how impossible it might feel to change the way you act, there is always something you can do to get yourself moving. That’s what makes it important to be able to identify Part X as it emerges in your life. Recognizing its presence is an action, and, when done with discipline, this action becomes the first step in freeing yourself from the prison Part X has you trapped in.

In the more poetic language of the nineteenth century, the crucial importance of labeling Part X is summed up by the famous phrase “Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty.

The illusion that you can obtain a “magical something” that will exonerate you from using the tools. This is reinforced day and night by the consumer culture that surrounds you. The illusion always leads to the same result: you quit. In success, you think the tools are no longer necessary; and in failure, you’re too demoralized to use them.

The biggest difference between those who succeed and those who fail at any endeavor is their level of commitment.

solo quien progresa ante la adversidad alcanza la fuerza interior.

as we need air. This is not abstract philosophy, it is a description of our nature. But it requires constant work to stay in touch with these forces. And yet it is also our nature to try to avoid this work.

Without the belief that we are living the totality of a God-willed life, no amount of money or fame will calm us down.

The most profound value of a tool is that it takes you beyond what happens inside your head. It connects you to a world infinitely bigger than you are, a world of limitless forces. It doesn’t matter whether you call this the collective unconscious or the spiritual world. I found it simplest to call it the “higher world,” and the forces it contains I call “higher forces.