Pee Wee Herman Quotes

My mashed potatoes come with a masturbation sound you pour on top, like gravy. I got the recipe from Pee Wee Herman.

I know you are, but what am I?

Pee-wee Herman yelling through a vocoder,

The way it’s going… (166 words) A foul-mouthed Pee-wee Herman runs for president. People finally realize what a racist, xenophobic, misogynistic, and homophobic bigot he is. He’s clearly not a politician. Rather, he’s someone who speaks his mind, and that makes him relatable. Herman runs against a faceless, forgettable career backbencher who’s been wrong on every issue for half a century, has become a multimillionaire without a legal avenue to attaining his fortune, and who you’re told you have to vote for because he’s experienced. Last year, we were told that the politician had a lobotomy, but the alternative is even worse. The voters will be hit with a tsunami of stomach-turning, deceptive ads and told that they have to vote for one of the two, or else they’ll be throwing away their democracy. In four years, they’ll run Franklin Delano Roosevelt’s coat for president. No one will notice. His coat will have more integrity than all of the idiots in recent years they’ve presented to us so we can confirm them.

was as if Pee-wee Herman had opened his mouth to speak and James Earl Jones’s voice had come out.

I’m dead glad to meet you both,” Thomas drawled in his best Texas accent, which sounded more like a Canadian version of Pee-wee Herman.

That’s my name. Don’t wear it out!

Layyy-dieeeeeees and gentlesquirts!” the little man cried, in a voice like fingernails being dragged down the inside of Pee-wee Herman’s voice box.

Prince is like the Monkees. A Pee-wee Herman trip. He’s appealing to the same audience.