Npd Quotes

The narc has been living in denial of their humanity and normal vulnerable feelings for so long there is an entire life time of unexpressed, repressed emotions rotting in the depths of their psyche. This is why they cannot stand to be alone. In that stillness they start to notice the stink coming up from the basement.

Always think deep inside and listen to your gut about someone that “loves” you. If you wonder if they should be treating you that way you know the answer.

Everything happens because there was a lesson you needed to learn. Move on from the messenger they were not the lesson. Find the lesson and you will never repeat it again.

An emotionally abusive relationship, in very simplistic terms, is much like standing up in a too hot bath and sinking back in so as not to feel so dizzy.

Look very deep, when did you abandon yourself?

Always remember who you were before knowing a narcissist. If you don't know who you were, invent who you want to be.

Do not seek your worth in someone else. Your worth is inside you, realize this and then find a partner worthy of you. Never stay if they do not know your worth.

People with NPD have a strong need, in every area of their life, to be treated as if they’re special. To those with NPD, other people are simply mirrors, useful only insofar as they reflect back the special view of themselves they so desperately long to see. If that means making others look bad by comparison—say, by ruining their reputation at work—so be it. Because life is a constant competition, they’re also usually riddled with envy over what other people seem to have. And they’ll let you know

To forgive or not forgive, that is the question. Victims of abuse have been hurt in so many ways it makes it hard to forgive. Holding the injury bonds us to the abuser, forgiving makes you stronger and sets you free of that hurt.

The lower functioning NPD individual (in closer proximity to the sociopath on the continuum) will be prone to constantly bending the rules for himself although outwardly he may criticize others for a similar infraction or transgression.

When struggling to forgive yourself you must talk to yourself as if you were your own mother. Would you tell your child to forgive herself for not knowing something at the time?

Don't let fear of your unknown future paralyze you. You get to write the next chapter so get out your crayon. Dream it plan how you will get there and build it.

They are compulsive liars. A tactic they use is to add a nugget of truth to the lies so make them more believable.

Narcissists are sexual vampires. Just like a vampire needs blood and cares NOT where he gets it. A narcissist thinks he is not being unfaithful because he really didn't commit to you. If it's an act it doesn't count.

narcissistic personality disorder, or NPD. According to DSM-IV, NPD is distinguished by a pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy

people with NPD bend the truth to fit their story of who they are. If reality suggests they’re not special, but flawed, fragile, and—even worse—mediocre, then they simply ignore or distort reality.

higher functioning NPD individual will have a rigid sense of right and wrong, which tends to be black and white, or concrete. She will often be extremely judgmental of others and harsh in her opinion of the necessary punishments for wrongdoing. While she may rarely

When you hold onto anger it eats at your soul. Anger never changes someone elses heart, but it will change yours.

The greatest gift we give ourselves is to give up the need for vindication. Trust in karma, move on and learn to let go.

Always do the right thing, despite the games someone else is playing.

People pleasing is a very dangerous lifestyle. In the end you lose yourself in the needs of others.

You will do 90% of everything in the relationship. The 10% they give is only when they want something.

When you don't want to do something, and you are guilted into doing it. Perhaps the eggshells under your feet keep you in fear so you end up doing what you didn't want to do. This is abuse!

Forgiveness is the meaning of grace. The grace to love yourself enough to be willing to put your trust in releasing the pain attached to whatever fucked up stuff happened to you. This is for you, not them.

When you forgive it means you are ready to walk away from the fight.

When you recover from Narcissistic abuse, look for courage in your heart. You can rebuild as long as you never surrender.

Forget the past, you cannot change it. Always remember the lesson, and stay the hell away from your abuser.

As a people pleaser you need to learn to set boundaries and love people without being their slave. Only please people to the level they please you.

They told me I would never amount to anything unless I married a man to take care of me. Never listen to that lie, always care for yourself.

Everything life gives me I can handle with confidence, grace and ease. I have the courage to accept myself, fully and completely.

Why do you need validation? Will it serve you to see proof? Let me tell you it hurts more if you do. Here is where you must set boundaries. Cheating a one strike rule because for every one strike you catch them on, you missed three.

Pathological narcissism begins when people become so addicted to feeling special that, just like with any drug, they’ll do anything to get their “high,” including lie, steal, cheat, betray, and even hurt those closest to them. Imagine this starting around 9 on the spectrum and getting worse as we approach 10. At these points, you’re in the realm of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).

By contrast, the individual with a character disorder lacks the ability to recognize that he has a problem and, if confronted with this possibility, would not consider himself responsible in the matter. Essentially, the only difficulties or pain the NPD person will be conscious of are those negative consequences that his behaviors bring about, especially in his relationships. Regardless of his culpability, the NPD person will blame everyone else or the circumstances of his life rather than acknowledge that he has a significant problem.

Looking for someone to tell me how great I am, do everything for me and don't dare want anything from me. Skills... Fooled easily, kind, loving, smart with low self love. Willing to keep quiet while I abuse you. People with boundaries need not apply. Call Narcissist 555-123-4567.

Imagine for a moment that you do not experience yourself as a "self." From this perspective, you can understand the difficulty the NPD person has in recognizing the unique and separate existence of another "self," or person. In a sense, the narcissist views others and the world around him as an extension of himself, perhaps as you might view your arm or leg. Because the narcissist can only understand others by absorbing them into his own experience of self, he determines that others should behave and act the way that HE behaves and acts. Again, to use the analogy of the arm and leg, he unconsciously expects you to conform to his will, just as his own arm or leg would do. When your behavior deviates from his expectations, he often becomes as upset with you as he would be if his arm or leg were no longer under his control.

Forgiveness is letting go of the anger that unforgiveness holds. Forgive once, or resent everyday that is your choice.

You are enough, you can care for yourself. Stop believing the narcissists lies and do the work to heal.

Their is a lot of life after "I don't give a shit." What will your life look like when you don't give a shit?

Face your fears, by creating a plan. We are usually afraid of the unknown, so expose it, plan it and conquer your fears.

When you feel overwhelmed, sad or confused about life. Take inventory, look around with gratitude for everything from the sun, trees, birds, water and angels that watch over you. Be mindful of this safe place and your troubles will melt away.

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) causes problems in many areas of life, such as relationships, work, school or financial affairs. People with NPD may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they're not given the special favors or admiration, which they believe they deserve. They may find their relationships unfulfilling. Others may not enjoy being around them.

Betrayal is a double edge sword. When victims are betrayed, they struggle to find the reasons 'why' and they resist healing. Release the anger, because holding onto it means you still care.

Family doesn't mean they are like the Waltons. No contact is for you and it makes you stronger then you know. The hardest thing for an empath is walking away from family, we always hoped for the best.

Go confidently in the direction your dreams call you. Finding your dream takes its time, be ready to switch your course quickly. There is no greater gift you can give this world then to follow your dreams.

Change is the only permanent thing in our lives. Sometimes things change for the immediate good; other times we ask why. Just because you don't understand today doesn't mean there isn't a lesson we must learn.

When we care too much for a person that doesn't care at all, we lose ourselves. Never again should you allow to not be given to equally.

When you struggle with fear and trust issues, be aware that you may not trust yourself. You are the first person you must learn to trust.

Today is the day to forgive yourself for the mistakes you have made. Learn the lesson and move on.

You may feel scared when starting again. Pull out your bravery and blaze a new life.

Everyone has fears, it is the bravery of heart that triumphs over all fears.

Learn to follow your own map, enjoy being yourself. Forge a life of connected moments.

In order to be fearless, just “fear” less.

Everywhere you walk today, everything you see, everything you taste, be grateful. Someone can't walk, someone can't see, someone is hungry.

NPD is not a chemical imbalance. And it is not genetic. It is a complex of behaviors, a deeply ingrained habit.

narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is something far more serious, characterized by grandiosity, entitlement, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy.

Above all is the NPD person's need for control, particularly in close relationships.

Someone with NPD cannot change. They can promise, misrepresent themselves, and fake change for a little while, but will soon unconsciously revert back to their bad behaviors.

the general rules of reciprocity are not working with the NPD person. The relationship begins to operate more and more on his terms as if these are the only terms.

The typical reaction of a BPD/NPD/HPD to being caught in lies, manipulations and other destructive actions, is to attack whomever caught them, and portray themselves as victims who have been denied empathy and understanding.

Narcissists are blamers, they are not capable of taking responsibility. At first you know it is not your fault, over time you get exhausted from trying to explain your innocence and you surrender to the lies, just to keep the peace.

Narcissists Cheat. If they have been caught in other lies, what makes you believe their cheating lies? What is your die hard boundary on cheating? Once? Twice? Remember your children are watching and learning how they should be treated. Stand up for them.

The relationship moved fast, I was swept off my feet. He seemed so perfect, everything I had ever dreamt of. His family lovebombed me and used my son to hook me. From the start the unusual family ways triggered my intuition. My concerns were swept under and distractions filled the cracks.

People with NPD operate unfairly and abusively, with a toxic cocktail of infantile neediness and selfish disregard for the needs of others. You have likely been used, shamed, gaslighted, bullied, perhaps terrorized, and, adding to the craziness, told in endless ways that you are to blame for the abuse.

Understand the narcissist will be a worse parent when they are out of the fake family game. On the surface everyone will hear what a good parent they are. Your kids will be devalued and possibly be discarded. Be the balanced grounded loving person you were before the narcissist and your children have a chance.

folks with NPD have shallow emotional lives because so much must remain hidden, both from themselves and from others. This shallowness makes them hard to get to know, because there doesn’t seem to be much of a real person beneath the façade. This is the opposite of most people with BPD, who feel and express a very wide range of emotions.

Keep dreaming - when you have a dream, set goals on how to get there. When you work hard for your dreams it makes them that much better when they come true.

Life will always deliver problems, thankfully, there is always a solution to every problem. Your job is to solve the problem, absorb the lesson and move on.

Going no contact with a narcissist is not a sign of weakness; it's a courageous act of self-preservation and healing

Narcissists are consistently inconsistent this keeps the victim living in cognitive dissonance

People pleasing is really fearing people’s reactions, rejection or abandonment.

Children who experience narcissistic parents’ rage and disapproval hold that feeling of 'not good enough’ which makes them vulnerable to repeating abuse patterns.

Remember 50/50 chance of survival is better than no chance. Use your 50% to teach them boundaries, self love and what abuse is.

Abundance appears, fear disappears when you find grateful.

But if he is angry at the world for doing him harm, why does he take it out on his loving partner? Couldn’t he just as readily express his rage by playing racquetball or pounding pillows. His ideas about her role seem paradoxical. On the one hand, the narcissistic husband has vested his wife with tremendous power. She is necessary for his self-repair, but instead of valuing her and seeking comfort in her arms, he beats and humiliates her. Because he sees her as available to meet any and all of his needs, he releases his rage and any self-hate at her; such an act helps him ultimately feel powerful again, making him realize he is not weak and shattered. When the narcissistic man eels the terror and rage associated with his own internal fragmentation, his outburst restores his sense of power and control. He turns the anger expanding within him away from himself, toward his wife. He insists that she’s the defective one, she’s to blame, because she has not met his needs. Such acts of externalization are key to the NPD batterer. His violent behavior restores his self-esteem. He believes that his actions are not his fault; he is just trying to take care of himself.

Those with NPD gain power over others by holding things over their head. This is often financially, but not always. They use what's important to you. They fish for your deepest desire and sink the hook. Take a look at your life. Have you been caught? Is your desire and gratitude out of balance? You can get free. Don't struggle. Follow your heart. -promotion for Escape from Narc Island

Unhealthy narcissism is occurring when an individual excessively pursues admiration, attention, status, understanding, support, money, power, control, or perfection in some form. It also means that the NPD person is not able to recognize, other than superficially, the feelings and needs of others. The rules of reciprocity are not operating in the relationship. This is not to say that NPD individuals don't often shower others with attention, gifts, or favors. Indeed, they often do. But the ultimate goal is always for some kind of return. The giving may be to foster a certain image or an overall feeling of indebtedness in you, such as an IOU note to be called in at some other time. You, of course, would rather believe you received the gift because you are cared for and valued.

When NPD and psychopathy combine, they form a pattern of behavior called malignant narcissism. This isn’t a diagnosis, but a term coined by psychoanalyst Erich Fromm and elaborated on by personality disorder expert, Otto Kernberg, to describe people so driven by feeling special that they essentially see other people as pawns in their game of kill or be killed, whether metaphorically or literally.

Remember I spoke earlier of how there are three layers of abuse to this NPD? The first layer is our mother’s abuse. The second layer is her denial of it and invalidation of our experiences. The third layer is society’s denial of it, and invalidation of our experiences. And if you go No Contact, it’s very possible that others – neighbours, friends, extended family – will judge you harshly for it. This can be difficult to deal with. As Lucinda on the forum said, ‘I struggled with this because I thought their opinions of me somehow defined who I really was. If they thought I was bad it felt like I really was bad.’ She then realised, however, ‘When I got to know myself I realized I'm fine just the way I am. I know I’m a good person. Other people's opinions are just their opinions, they are not who I am.

AGING WITH A NARCISSIST You thought you would grow old together, travel the world, and be there in sickness as you age. A narcissists sense of entitlement destroys this promise, they will abandon you for greener pasture.

Prezirem ljude koji žive u sećanjima, nikad nisam bio od njih. Takvi ljudi su za mene luzeri, mada... Nekad nije loše da sećanja s vremena na vreme posete čoveka. Shvatiš kako je počelo. Shvatiš zašto je počelo. Shvatiš zašto još uvek traje.

Many survivors get so angry that they find themselves dropping the f-bomb all the time, even when they never swore in their lives. This expression of unfamiliar anger is quite healthy, it's okay to be fucking angry! Just make your way out by healing the wounds.

The severity and intensity of this disorder comes from the NPD individual's desperate pursuit to gain a sense of self. He consciously understands none of this, yet his inner need to feel worthwhile causes him to manipulate people in order to maintain an endless supply of attention, control, status, money, power, or recognition. This single-minded purpose covers the almost malignant anxiety and emptiness he feels. Totally unaware of his inner problems, he looks to the world for fulfillment, relentlessly driving himself and others to meet his grandiose expectations.

Narcissists use jealousy to control you. They flirt in front of you and when you ask about it, you become the jealous one. They get jealous and accuse you of things you aren't doing. They also get jealous of the closeness of your friends and family, so they gaslight you into isolating yourself from them.

It was about malignant narcissism—a particularly sinister type of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). A malignant narcissist sucks a victim in by mirroring her (“I thought I’d found my soul mate,” survivors recall): this is the honeymoon period. Once the victim’s hooked, the narcissist vampire feeds off her for his own “supply” until he inevitably finds another victim who he believes is a better source. Once victim number one is devalued in his mind, the malignant narcissist is free to drop the angelic act and to openly degrade and exploit her—and in doing so, reveals himself as the greedy, destructive, aggressive and sadistic predator he truly is. Omigod

Investing your trust in an individual who evades responsibility while effortlessly shifting blame onto you lacks dependability. Trust is founded on the capability to assume accountability; however, narcissists neither possess the capacity for responsibility nor the willingness to accept it – they consistently allocate blame instead.

As a child of a narcissistic mother I was never told I could do anything right. Disapproval was the “normal” of my life, I was never taught to believe in myself, nor was I guided to better choices. I was alone in figuring out life. Deep inside my self-esteem was uncertain and unsure, on the surface I looked confident because I was told to act that way.

Concerning the narcissist- after having been so seemingly incredibly loving and gentle, compassionate and caring- it would be like a light switch had suddenly been turned off and “all of a sudden” they simply did not care. They turned into a cold person, someone without love, compassion, empathy or regard for the subject’s feelings what so ever. It’s like they suddenly and literally stopped being human.

narcissistic personality disorder, or NPD. According to DSM-IV, NPD is distinguished by a pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy . . . , indicated by five (or more) of the following: 1. An exaggerated sense of self-importance . . . 2. Preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love 3. Believes that he or she is “special” and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people . . . 4. Requires excessive admiration 5. Has a sense of entitlement . . . 6. Selfishly takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends 7. Lacks empathy 8. Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her 9. Shows arrogant, haughty, patronizing, or contemptuous behaviors or attitudes

The overall definition of someone with a narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by a combination of severe limitations in understanding other people and their feelings, as well as an excessive pursuit of what are called narcissistic supplies, such as admiration, attention, status, understanding, support, money, power, control, or perfection in some form. While all of us need these supplies in adequate amounts to feel a sense of well being, the narcissist pursues them with an unrelenting desperation and a keen ability to manipulate others. Meanwhile the outer persona of the NPD individual is generally one of confidence and control, alongside a smooth or charming demeanor. As your involvement with the narcissist develops you will notice that the relationship increasingly becomes one-way with you in the primary giving position.

We all have some of what may be termed narcissistic needs, such as the need to be valued, admired, understood, or simply recognized as a unique person. During painful periods, we become much more narcissistic, or self-centered, and our demands for attention, mirroring, validation, etc. increase. However, when we feel better, we generally return to a baseline ability to reciprocate in our relationships. Instead of only taking, we give-and-take by listening, understanding, validating, and supporting others. For NPD individuals, however, they feel endlessly entitled to special consideration and attention. The narcissist somehow never moves past the unique circumstance that requires you to put yourself aside and realize that what's happening for him is more special, more upsetting, or more wonderful. Eventually, you realize that you and your needs are on indefinite hold.

The scapegoat is the family punching bag. On a daily basis, you are singled out for all of the collective ridicule, made into the butt of every joke, and excluded from family events, holidays, and important legal matters. It doesn't take long for outsiders or other relatives to take note of your role and to be drawn into the destructive dynamics. Family scapegoats are belittled, humiliated, battered, rejected, betrayed, and treated poorly. It's a clear case of psychological abuse, manipulation, and harassment.

found myself constantly drawn to the subject of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), which I have concluded is inextricably linked to psychopathy, although this link is rarely mentioned in medical papers or among the psychiatric profession generally. As with psychopathy, people with NPD make up approximately 1 per cent of the population with rates greater in men. Another direct comparison between those suffering with NPD and psychopathy/sociopathy is that both types are characterised by exaggerated feelings of self-importance. In its moderate to extreme forms these people are excessively preoccupied with personal adequacy, power, prestige and vanity; mentally unable to see the destructive damage they are causing themselves and others. Symptoms of the NPD disorder include seeking constant approval from others who are successful in positions of power in whatever form it may be. Many are selfish, grandiose pathological liars; their egos and sense of self-esteem over-inflated, while at once they are torn between exaggerated self-appraisal and the reality that they might never amount to much.

True narcissists will defend themselves adamantly and become triggered when confronted with the truth, i.e. via a narcissistic injury - this results in narcissistic rage, which is a disproportionate amount of anger towards a perceived slight, disagreement or criticism that serves as a blow to the narcissist's ego and constructed false self. This will only continue the pathological mind games and narcissists will most likely become incredibly defensive in ways that can be even more traumatic. Knowing that they are narcissists are enough - no need to confront them with what you know. When narcissists suffer a narcissistic injury from a perceived criticism, they will often respond with rage and aggression. Many people with NPD don’t wish to accept accountability for their abuse and many rarely will. They would rather project and blame others than accept that they have a false self. Attempting to “shed light” on their condition often proves fruitless and only strengthens their defense mechanisms. I always recommend that survivors focus less on what they can do to change their abusers, who probably can’t be changed, and refocus on their own self-care.

When NPD and psychopathy combine, they form a pattern of behavior called malignant narcissism.

I used to believe that 'fighting for love no matter how hard the situation is' is the only thing to make our relationship work. Until one day I asked myself, why I should be a single fighter, fighting for your love while I gave you my love freely.

When did my life go from a Hallmark movie to a Lifetime movie?

Recovery from emotional abuse is a unique journey for everyone. Start by controlling what you can, grab a hold of your new chapter. Learn to let go of the past, because you never really had control of that.

Those with personality disorders are typically characterized by a simplistic, naïve, and formulated view of mental states, most typical of those with BPD, or by hyperactive or overanalytic RF, most typical of those with NPD. In the latter, the individual claims infallible knowledge of mental states with little evidence to corroborate this conviction and have a lack of awareness of the separateness of the mind of self and others (Fonagy et al., 1998).

Patients with combined NPD/BPD were significantly more likely to be classified as dismissing (characterized by idealization/devaluation of others and dismissal of need for closeness) or cannot classify (e.g., characterized by oscillation between angry preoccupation or passive enmeshment with attachment figures and dismissing devaluation of them) than was the BPD group.

I found myself constantly drawn to the subject of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), which I have concluded is inextricably linked to psychopathy, although this link is rarely mentioned in medical papers or among the psychiatric profession generally. As with psychopathy, people with NPD make up approximately 1 per cent of the population with rates greater in men. Another direct comparison between those suffering with NPD and psychopathy/sociopathy is that both types are characterised by exaggerated feelings of self-importance. In its moderate to extreme forms these people are excessively preoccupied with personal adequacy, power, prestige and vanity; mentally unable to see the destructive damage they are causing themselves and others. Symptoms of the NPD disorder include seeking constant approval from others who are successful in positions of power in whatever form it may be. Many are selfish, grandiose pathological liars; their egos and sense of self-esteem over-inflated, while at once they are torn between exaggerated self-appraisal and the reality that they might never amount to much.