β
Please believe that one single positive dream is more important than a thousand negative realities.
β
β
Adeline Yen Mah (Chinese Cinderella: The True Story of an Unwanted Daughter)
β
Some changes look negative on the surface but you will soon realize that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge.
β
β
Eckhart Tolle
β
How would your life be different ifβ¦You stopped making negative judgmental assumptions about people you encounter? Let today be the dayβ¦You look for the good in everyone you meet and respect their journey.
β
β
Steve Maraboli (Life, the Truth, and Being Free)
β
How wrong to have been so negative, how wrong to have been so gloomy, how wrong to have run away from life, how wrong to have said no, again and again, instead of yes.
β
β
Jonathan Franzen
β
Of course motivation is not permanent. But then, neither is bathing; but it is something you should do on a regular basis.
β
β
Zig Ziglar (Raising Positive Kids in a Negative World)
β
Forgive the past. It is over. Learn from it and let go. People are constantly changing and growing. Do not cling to a limited, disconnected, negative image of a person in the past. See that person now. Your relationship is always alive and changing.
β
β
Brian L. Weiss (Messages from the Masters: Tapping Into the Power of Love)
β
From the backstabbing co-worker to the meddling sister-in-law, you are in charge of how you react to the people and events in your life. You can either give negativity power over your life or you can choose happiness instead. Take control and choose to focus on what is important in your life. Those who cannot live fully often become destroyers of life.
β
β
AnaΓ―s Nin
β
When someone tells me "no," it doesn't mean I can't do it, it simply means I can't do it with them.
β
β
Karen E. Quinones Miller
β
To give your positive or negative attention to something is a way of giving energy. The most damaging form of behavior is withholding your attention.
β
β
Masaru Emoto (The Hidden Messages in Water)
β
If you want to write a negative review, don't tickle me gently with your aesthetic displeasure about my work. Unleash the goddamn Kraken."
[on Twitter, July 17, 2012]
β
β
Scott Lynch
β
The desire for more positive experience is itself a negative experience. And, paradoxically, the acceptance of oneβs negative experience is itself a positive experience. (p.9)
β
β
Mark Manson (The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life)
β
Learning to distance yourself from all the negativity is one of the greatest lessons to achieve inner peace.
β
β
Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
β
What labels me, negates me.
β
β
SΓΈren Kierkegaard
β
Relationships are mysterious. We doubt the positive qualities in others, seldom the negative. You will say to your partner: do you really love me? Are you sure you love me? You will ask this a dozen times and drive the person nuts. But you never ask: are you really mad at me? Are you sure youβre angry? When someone is angry, you donβt doubt it for a moment. Yet the reverse should be true. We should doubt the negative in life, and have faith in the positive.
β
β
Christopher Pike (Remember Me (Remember Me, #1-3))
β
True friends are those who came into your life, saw the most negative part of you, but are not ready to leave you, no matter how contagious you are to them.
β
β
Michael Bassey Johnson (The Infinity Sign)
β
Rather than letting our negativity get the better of us, we could acknowledge that right now we feel like a piece of shit and not be squeamish about taking a good look.
β
β
Pema ChΓΆdrΓΆn (When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times)
β
Right," she said, "We're going to the Land of the Dead and I shouldn't think negative.
β
β
Rick Riordan (The Lightning Thief (Percy Jackson and the Olympians, #1))
β
A truly compassionate attitude toward others does not change even if they behave negatively or hurt you.
β
β
Dalai Lama XIV
β
It is important to expect nothing, to take every experience, including the negative ones, as merely steps on the path, and to proceed.
β
β
Ram Dass
β
You just can't live that negative way.
You know what I mean. Make way for the positive day. Cause it's a new day...
β
β
Bob Marley
β
7 things negative people will do to you. They will...
1. Demean your value;
2. Destroy your image
3. Drive you crazily!
4. Dispose your dreams!
5. Discredit your imagination!
6. Deframe your abilities and
7. Disbelieve your opinions!
Stay away from negative people!
β
β
Israelmore Ayivor
β
Associate Yourself with People Who Think Positively:
Associate yourself with people who think positively. You cannot surround yourself with negative people and expect positive outcomes.
β
β
Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
β
When you give yourself permission to communicate what matters to you in every situation you will have peace despite rejection or disapproval. Putting a voice to your soul helps you to let go of the negative energy of fear and regret.
β
β
Shannon L. Alder
β
People tend to be generous when sharing their nonsense, fear, and ignorance. And while they seem quite eager to feed you their negativity, please remember that sometimes the diet we need to be on is a spiritual and emotional one. Be cautious with what you feed your mind and soul. Fuel yourself with positivity and let that fuel propel you into positive action.
β
β
Steve Maraboli (Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience)
β
I felt myself melting into the shadows like the negative of a person I'd never seen before in my life.
β
β
Sylvia Plath (The Bell Jar)
β
Once you label me you negate me.
β
β
SΓΈren Kierkegaard
β
The mind can go either direction under stressβtoward positive or toward negative: on or off. Think of it as a spectrum whose extremes are unconsciousness at the negative end and hyperconsciousness at the positive end. The way the mind will lean under stress is strongly influenced by training.
β
β
Frank Herbert (Dune (Dune, #1))
β
Other people's views and troubles can be contagious. Don't sabotage yourself by unwittingly adopting negative, unproductive attitudes through your associations with others.
β
β
Epictetus
β
Negative results are just what I want. Theyβre just as valuable to me as positive results. I can never find the thing that does the job best until I find the ones that donβt.
β
β
Thomas A. Edison
β
Do not let your negative thoughts have power over you because those thoughts will end up controlling your life. No one can live a positive life with a negative mind.
β
β
Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
β
All negativity is caused by an accumulation of psychological time and denial of the present. Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry - all forms of fear - are caused by too much future, and
not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms
of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence.
β
β
Eckhart Tolle (The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment)
β
As you grow, you learn more. If you stayed as ignorant as you were at twenty-two, you'd always be twenty-two. Aging is not just decay, you know. It's growth. It's more than the negative that you're going to die, it's the positive that you understand you're going to die, and that you live a better life because of it.
β
β
Mitch Albom (Tuesdays with Morrie)
β
The human mind has a primitive ego defense mechanism that negates all realities that produce too much stress for the brain to handle. Itβs called Denial.
β
β
Dan Brown (Inferno (Robert Langdon, #4))
β
Protect your good image from the eyes of negative viewers, who may look at your good appearance with an ugly fiendish eye, and ruin your positive qualities with their chemical infested tongues.
β
β
Michael Bassey Johnson
β
Two wrongs don't make a right, but don't three lefts make a right? Two wrongs don't make a right, but don't two negatives make a positive?
β
β
Andrew Clements (Things Not Seen (Things, #1))
β
Itβs important that what thoughts you are feeding into your mind because your thoughts create your belief and experiences. You have positive thoughts and you have negative ones too. Nurture your mind with positive thoughts: kindness, empathy, compassion, peace, love, joy, humility, generosity, etc. The more you feed your mind with positive thoughts, the more you can attract great things into your life.
β
β
Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
β
War doesn't negate decency. It demands it, even more than in times of peace." - Baba
β
β
Khaled Hosseini (The Kite Runner)
β
I leave Sisyphus at the foot of the mountain. One always finds one's burden again. But Sisyphus teaches the higher fidelity that negates the gods and raises rocks. He too concludes that all is well. This universe henceforth without a master seems to him neither sterile nor futile. Each atom of that stone, each mineral flake of that night-filled mountain, in itself, forms a world. The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy.
β
β
Albert Camus
β
Save your skin from the corrosive acids from the mouths of toxic people. Someone who just helped you to speak evil about another person can later help another person to speak evil about you.
β
β
Israelmore Ayivor
β
Instead of worrying about what could go wrong, change your thoughts to what could go right. When you change the negative thought into a positive one, it eliminates the negative one.
β
β
Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
β
Surround Yourself with Positive People Who Believe in Your Dreams
Distance yourself from negative people who try to lower your motivation and decrease your ambition. Create space for positive people to come into your life.
Surround yourself with positive people who believe in your dreams, encourage your ideas, support your ambitions, and bring out the best in you.
β
β
Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
β
Be careful the stories you're telling yourself about your current circumstances; a head full of negative thoughts has no space for positive ones.
β
β
Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
β
You cannot have a positive life and a negative mind.
β
β
Joyce Meyer (Battlefield of the Mind: Winning the Battle in Your Mind)
β
We must assume every event has significance and contains a message that pertains to our questions...this especially applies to what we used to call bad things...the challenge is to find the silver lining in every event, no matter how negative.
β
β
James Redfield (The Celestine Prophecy (Celestine Prophecy, #1))
β
You cannot expect to live a positive life if you hang with negative people.
β
β
Joel Osteen
β
It is as if my life were magically run by two electric currents: joyous positive and despairing negative - which ever is running at the moment dominates my life, floods it.
β
β
Sylvia Plath (The Bell Jar)
β
When you are joyful, when you say yes to life and have fun and project positivity all around you, you become a sun in the center of every constellation, and people want to be near you.
β
β
Shannon L. Alder
β
Judgment is a negative frequency.
β
β
Stephen Richards
β
I've had it with being nice, understanding, fair and hopeful. I feel like being negative all day. The chip on my shoulder could sink the QE2. I've got an attitude problem and nobody better get in my way...I'm in a bad mood and the whole stupid little world is gonna pay!
β
β
John Waters (Crackpot: The Obsessions of John Waters)
β
Those who pray for your downfall are concentrating negative thoughts towards you, without taking cognisance of the slippery ground in which they are standing, which could lead to their downfall.
β
β
Michael Bassey Johnson
β
There will never be no love at all.
β
β
Bob Marley
β
I have noticed that people are dealing too much with the negative, with what is wrong. ... Why not try the other way, to look into the patient and see positive things, to just touch those things and make them bloom?
β
β
Thich Nhat Hanh
β
Sometimes they do things to make me do the opposite of what they think, I think, they think, I am going to do.
β
β
James Dashner (The Death Cure (The Maze Runner, #3))
β
If you walked away from a
toxic, negative, abusive,
one-sided, dead-end
low vibrational
relationship or friendship
β you won.
β
β
Lalah Delia
β
Someone who smiles too much with you can sometime frown too much with you at your back.
β
β
Michael Bassey Johnson
β
We all have negative thoughts now and then, but we can choose not to dwell there and not to let them control us.
β
β
Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
β
Sometimes loneliness makes the loudest noise.
β
β
Aaron Ben-Ze'ev
β
Whenever you feel a negative emotion be alone in a room and just sit down with it and feel. Don't judge it, criticize it, intellectualize it, explain it away. Allow yourself to feel the pain. It's okay. Accompany it - breathe into it - and after a while, you'll feel the anger or fear or sadness lose it's urgency and power. Allow God to tenderly embrace you in your pain. And then, at the right time, you can let go.
β
β
Bo SΓ‘nchez (You Have The Power to Create Love: Take Another Step on the Simple Path to Happiness)
β
Look at children. Of course they may quarrel, but generally speaking they do not harbor ill feelings as much or as long as adults do. Most adults have the advantage of education over children, but what is the use of an education if they show a big smile while hiding negative feelings deep inside? Children donΒt usually act in such a manner. If they feel angry with someone, they express it, and then it is finished. They can still play with that person the following day.
β
β
Dalai Lama XIV
β
An entire sea of water canβt sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship. Similarly, the negativity of the world canβt put you down unless you allow it to get inside you.
β
β
Goi Nasu
β
I had jumped off the edge, and then, at the very last moment, something reached out and caught me in midair. That something is what I define as love. It is the one thing that can stop a man from falling, powerful enough to negate the laws of gravity.
β
β
Paul Auster (Moon Palace)
β
Whatever you do, good or bad, people will always have something negative to say
β
β
W.H. Auden
β
Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity and fear of others. Never decide to do nothing just because you can only do little. Do what you can. You would be surprised at what "little" acts have done for our world.
β
β
Steve Maraboli (Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience)
β
The process begins with the individual womanβs acceptance that American women, without exception, are socialized to be racist, classist and sexist, in varying degrees, and that labeling ourselves feminists does not change the fact that we must consciously work to rid ourselves of the legacy of negative socialization.
β
β
bell hooks (Ain't I a Woman: Black Women and Feminism)
β
To be of good quality, you have to excuse yourself from the presence of shallow and callow minded individuals.
β
β
Michael Bassey Johnson
β
Everything worthwhile in life is won through surmounting the associated negative experience. Any attempt to escape the negative, to avoid it or quash it or silence it, only backfires. The avoidance of suffering is a form of suffering. The avoidance of struggle is a struggle. The denial of failure is a failure. Hiding what is shameful is itself a form of shame.
Pain is an inextricable thread in the fabric of life, and to tear it out is not only impossible, but destructive: attempting to tear it out unravels everything else with it. To try to avoid pain is to give too many fucks about pain. In contrast, if youβre able to not give a fuck about the pain, you become unstoppable." ~~~~ Mark Manson
β
β
Mark Manson (The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life)
β
The bible says no man can take your joy. That means no person can make you live with a negative attitude. No circumstance, no adversity can force you to live in despair. As Eleanor Roosevelt, wife of wheelchair-bound President Franklin D. Roosevelt, often said, βNo one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
β
β
Joel Osteen (Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential)
β
The Dark Forces have created countless troll farms to relentlessly spam the Internet with their agendas. Trillions of fake accounts are used to create disinformation, create a fake majority opinion about topics, bully people who are putting out information the Dark Forces donβt like, and get people arguing with each other to create negative energy.
β
β
Jasun Ether (The Beasts of Success)
β
Some people are in such utter darkness that they will burn you just to see a light. Try not to take it personally.
β
β
Kamand Kojouri
β
Don't destroy yourself by allowing negative people add gibberish and debris to your character, reputation, and aspirations. Keep all dreams alive but discreet, so that those with unhealthy tongues won't have any other option than to infest themselves with their own diseases.
β
β
Michael Bassey Johnson (The Infinity Sign)
β
See if you can catch yourself complaining, in either speech or thought, about a situation you find yourself in, what other people do or say, your surroundings, your life situation, even the weather. To complain is always nonacceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconscious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power. So change the situation by taking action or by speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness.
β
β
Eckhart Tolle (The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment)
β
Another way to be prepared is to think negatively. Yes, I'm a great optimist. but, when trying to make a decision, I often think of the worst case scenario. I call it 'the eaten by wolves factor.' If I do something, what's the most terrible thing that could happen? Would I be eaten by wolves? One thing that makes it possible to be an optimist, is if you have a contingency plan for when all hell breaks loose. There are a lot of things I don't worry about, because I have a plan in place if they do.
β
β
Randy Pausch (The Last Lecture)
β
Love chooses to believe the best about people. It gives them the benefit of the doubt. It refuses to fill in the unknowns with negative assumptions. And when our worst hopes are proven to be true, love makes every effort to deal with them and move forward. As much as possible, love focuses on the positive.
β
β
Stephen Kendrick (The Love Dare)
β
One of the lessons that I grew up with was to always stay true to yourself and never let what somebody else says distract you from your goals. And so when I hear about negative and false attacks, I really don't invest any energy in them, because I know who I am.
β
β
Michelle Obama
β
I usually know almost exactly how I feel. The problem is, I just can't tell anyone.
β
β
Meg Cabot (Princess in Love (The Princess Diaries, #3))
β
It makes no sense to try to extend a friendship that was only meant to be a season into a lifetime.
β
β
Mandy Hale (The Single WomanβLife, Love, and a Dash of Sass: Embracing Singleness with Confidence)
β
Why do I do anything?' she says. 'I'm educated enough to talk myself out of any plan. To deconstruct any fantasy. Explain away any goal. I'm so smart I can negate any dream.
β
β
Chuck Palahniuk (Choke)
β
Buy a gift for a dog, and you'll be amazed at the way it will dance and swerve its tail, but if don't have anything to offer to it, it won't even recognize your arrival; such are the attributes of fake friends.
β
β
Michael Bassey Johnson
β
It is necessary, and even vital, to set standards for your life and the people you allow in it.
β
β
Mandy Hale (The Single WomanβLife, Love, and a Dash of Sass: Embracing Singleness with Confidence)
β
Always remember that you were once alone, and the crowd you see in your life today are just as unecessary as when you were alone.
β
β
Michael Bassey Johnson
β
Toxic people will pollute everything around them. Donβt hesitate. Fumigate.
β
β
Mandy Hale (The Single WomanβLife, Love, and a Dash of Sass: Embracing Singleness with Confidence)
β
There is a magnificent, beautiful, wonderful painting in front of you! It is intricate, detailed, a painstaking labor of devotion and love! The colors are like no other, they swim and leap, they trickle and embellish! And yet you choose to fixate your eyes on the small fly which has landed on it! Why do you do such a thing?
β
β
C. JoyBell C.
β
Hark,β he said, his tone very dry. βWhat stone through yonder window breaks?β
Kami yelled up at him, βIt is the east, and Juliet is a jerk!β
Jared abandoned Shakespeare and demanded, βWhat do you think youβre doing?β
βThrowing a pebble,β said Kami defensively. βUhβ¦ and Iβll pay for the window.β
Jared vanished and Kami was ready to start shouting again, when he reemerged with the pebble clenched in his fist. βThis isnβt a pebble! This is a rock.β
βItβs possible that your behaviour has inspired some negative feelings that caused me to pick a slightly overlarge pebble,β Kami admitted.
β
β
Sarah Rees Brennan (Unspoken (The Lynburn Legacy, #1))
β
I want to learn more and more to see as beautiful what is necessary in things; then I shall be one of those who make things beautiful. Amor fati: let that be my love henceforth! I do not want to wage war against what is ugly. I do not want to accuse; I do not even want to accuse those who accuse. Looking away shall be my only negation. And all in all and on the whole: some day I wish to be only a Yes-sayer.
β
β
Friedrich Nietzsche (The Gay Science: With a Prelude in Rhymes and an Appendix of Songs)
β
The populace fell for this trick every time because they didnβt believe the Masters existed, or that anyone could be that evil. The Masters made sure to assign the label of being a conspiracy theorist to those smart and observant enough to have figured it out and were trying to warn others. The populace would then disregard and ridicule the whistleblower because the Masters had programmed the populace to react harshly to individuals who this label was applied to. The population had been programmed to negatively react to many ideas and labels, but the conspiracy-theorist label was one of the most heavily programmed because it was paramount for the Masters to stay hidden behind the curtains. You canβt dethrone a king if you donβt know they exist.
β
β
Jasun Ether (The Beasts of Success)
β
When you open yourself to the continually changing, impermanent, dynamic nature of your own being and of reality, you increase your capacity to love and care about other people and your capacity to not be afraid. You're able to keep your eyes open, your heart open, and your mind open. And you notice when you get caught up in prejudice, bias, and aggression. You develop an enthusiasm for no longer watering those negative seeds, from now until the day you die. And, you begin to think of your life as offering endless opportunities to start to do things differently.
β
β
Pema ChΓΆdrΓΆn (Practicing Peace in Times of War)
β
Depression is a lot like that: slowly, over the years, the data will accumulate in your heart and mind, a computer program for total negativity will build into your system, making life feel more and more unbearale. But you won't even notice it coming on, thinking that it is somehow normal, something about getter older, about turning eight or about turning twelve or turning fifteeen, and then one day you realize that your entire life is just awful, not worth living, a horror and a black blot on the white terrain of human existence. One morning you wake up afraid you are going to live.
β
β
Elizabeth Wurtzel (Prozac Nation)
β
Dalek: I will talk to the Doctor.
The Doctor: Oh will you? That's nice. Hello!
Dalek: The Dalek strategem nears completion. The fleet is almost ready. You will not intervene.
The Doctor: Oh really? Why's that, then?
Dalek: We have your associate. You will obey or she will be exterminated.
The Doctor: No.
Dalek: Explain yourself.
The Doctor: I said, "No."
Dalek: What is the meaning of this negative?
The Doctor: It means, "No."
Dalek: But she will be destroyed!
The Doctor: No! 'Cause this is what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna rescue her. I'm gonna save Rose Tyler from the middle of the Dalek fleet, and then I'm gonna save the Earth. And thenβjust to finish offβI'm gonna wipe every last stinking Dalek out of the sky!
Dalek: But you have no weapons, no defenses, no plan.
The Doctor: Yeah! And doesn't that scare you to death? Rose?
Rose: Yes, Doctor?
The Doctor: I'm coming to get you.
β
β
Russell T. Davies
β
The less you associate with some people, the more your life will improve.
Any time you tolerate mediocrity in others, it increases your mediocrity. An
important attribute in successful people is their impatience with negative
thinking and negative acting people. As you grow, your associates will
change. Some of your friends will not want you to go on. They will want you
to stay where they are. Friends that don't help you climb will want you to
crawl. Your friends will stretch your vision or choke your dream. Those that
don't increase you will eventually decrease you.
Consider this:
Never receive counsel from unproductive people. Never discuss your problems
with someone incapable of contributing to the solution, because those who
never succeed themselves are always first to tell you how. Not everyone has
a right to speak into your life. You are certain to get the worst of the
bargain when you exchange ideas with the wrong person. Don't follow anyone
who's not going anywhere.
With some people you spend an evening: with others you invest it. Be careful
where you stop to inquire for directions along the road of life. Wise is the
person who fortifies his life with the right friendships. If you run with
wolves, you will learn how to howl. But, if you associate with eagles, you
will learn how to soar to great heights.
"A mirror reflects a man's face, but what he is really like is shown by the
kind of friends he chooses."
The simple but true fact of life is that you become like those with whom you
closely associate - for the good and the bad.
Note: Be not mistaken. This is applicable to family as well as friends.
Yes...do love, appreciate and be thankful for your family, for they will
always be your family no matter what. Just know that they are human first
and though they are family to you, they may be a friend to someone else and
will fit somewhere in the criteria above.
"In Prosperity Our Friends Know Us. In Adversity We Know Our friends."
"Never make someone a priority when you are only an option for them."
"If you are going to achieve excellence in big things,you develop the habit in little matters.
Excellence is not an exception, it is a prevailing attitude.."..
β
β
Colin Powell
β
A lot of things are inherent in life -change, birth, death, aging, illness, accidents, calamities, and losses of all kinds- but these events don't have to be the cause of ongoing suffering. Yes, these events cause grief and sadness, but grief and sadness pass, like everything else, and are replaced with other experiences. The ego, however, clings to negative thoughts and feelings and, as a result, magnifies, intensifies, and sustains those emotions while the ego overlooks the subtle feelings of joy, gratitude, excitement, adventure, love, and peace that come from Essence. If we dwelt on these positive states as much as we generally dwell on our negative thoughts and painful emotions, our lives would be transformed.
β
β
Gina Lake (What About Now?: Reminders for Being in the Moment)
β
Some catastrophic moments invite clarity, explode in split moments: You smash your hand through a windowpane and then there is blood and shattered glass stained with red all over the place; you fall out a window and break some bones and scrape some skin. Stitches and casts and bandages and antiseptic solve and salve the wounds. But depression is not a sudden disaster. It is more like a cancer: At first its tumorous mass is not even noticeable to the careful eye, and then one day -- wham! -- there is a huge, deadly seven-pound lump lodged in your brain or your stomach or your shoulder blade, and this thing that your own body has produced is actually trying to kill you. Depression is a lot like that: Slowly, over the years, the data will accumulate in your heart and mind, a computer program for total negativity will build into your system, making life feel more and more unbearable. But you won't even notice it coming on, thinking that it is somehow normal, something about getting older, about turning eight or turning twelve or turning fifteen, and then one day you realize that your entire life is just awful, not worth living, a horror and a black blot on the white terrain of human existence. One morning you wake up afraid you are going to live.
In my case, I was not frightened in the least bit at the thought that I might live because I was certain, quite certain, that I was already dead. The actual dying part, the withering away of my physical body, was a mere formality. My spirit, my emotional being, whatever you want to call all that inner turmoil that has nothing to do with physical existence, were long gone, dead and gone, and only a mass of the most fucking god-awful excruciating pain like a pair of boiling hot tongs clamped tight around my spine and pressing on all my nerves was left in its wake.
That's the thing I want to make clear about depression: It's got nothing at all to do with life. In the course of life, there is sadness and pain and sorrow, all of which, in their right time and season, are normal -- unpleasant, but normal. Depression is an altogether different zone because it involves a complete absence: absence of affect, absence of feeling, absence of response, absence of interest. The pain you feel in the course of a major clinical depression is an attempt on nature's part (nature, after all, abhors a vacuum) to fill up the empty space. But for all intents and purposes, the deeply depressed are just the walking, waking dead.
And the scariest part is that if you ask anyone in the throes of depression how he got there, to pin down the turning point, he'll never know. There is a classic moment in The Sun Also Rises when someone asks Mike Campbell how he went bankrupt, and all he can say in response is, 'Gradually and then suddenly.' When someone asks how I love my mind, that is all I can say too
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Elizabeth Wurtzel (Prozac Nation)
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I must make two honest confessions to you, my Christian and Jewish brothers. First, I must confess that over the past few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro's great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen's Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to "order" than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says: "I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action"; who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man's freedom; who lives by a mythical concept of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait for a "more convenient season." Shallow understanding from people of good will is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection.
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Martin Luther King Jr. (Letter from the Birmingham Jail)
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Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things donβt go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades β how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you. But itβs life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember β if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And thatβs where you want to be.
Disappointmentβ s cousin is Frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you donβt know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release. Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved β movies take a long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result β at least I was learning how to write scripts, having a side plan β I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life β friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.
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Chetan Bhagat
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You are beautiful like demolition. Just the thought of you draws my knuckles white. I donβt need a god. I have you and your beautiful mouth, your hands holding onto me, the nails leaving unfelt wounds, your hot breath on my neck. The taste of your saliva. The darkness is ours. The nights belong to us. Everything we do is secret. Nothing we do will ever be understood; we will be feared and kept well away from. It will be the stuff of legend, endless discussion and limitless inspiration for the brave of heart. Itβs you and me in this room, on this floor. Beyond life, beyond morality. We are gleaming animals painted in moonlit sweat glow. Our eyes turn to jewels and everything we do is an example of spontaneous perfection. I have been waiting all my life to be with you. My heart slams against my ribs when I think of the slaughtered nights I spent all over the world waiting to feel your touch. The time I annihilated while I waited like a man doing a life sentence. Now youβre here and everything we touch explodes, bursts into bloom or burns to ash. History atomizes and negates itself with our every shared breath. I need you like life needs life. I want you bad like a natural disaster. You are all I see. You are the only one I want to know.
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Henry Rollins
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Those who fail to exhibit positive attitudes, no matter the external reality, are seen as maladjusted and in need of assistance. Their attitudes need correction. Once we adopt an upbeat vision of reality, positive things will happen. This belief encourages us to flee from reality when reality does not elicit positive feelings. These specialists in "happiness" have formulated something they call the "Law of Attraction." It argues that we attract those things in life, whether it is money, relationships or employment, which we focus on. Suddenly, abused and battered wives or children, the unemployed, the depressed and mentally ill, the illiterate, the lonely, those grieving for lost loved ones, those crushed by poverty, the terminally ill, those fighting with addictions, those suffering from trauma, those trapped in menial and poorly paid jobs, those whose homes are in foreclosure or who are filing for bankruptcy because they cannot pay their medical bills, are to blame for their negativity. The ideology justifies the cruelty of unfettered capitalism, shifting the blame from the power elite to those they oppress. And many of us have internalized this pernicious message, which in times of difficulty leads to personal despair, passivity and disillusionment.
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Chris Hedges
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Don't you believe in flying saucers, they ask me? Don't you believe in telepathy? β in ancient astronauts? β in the Bermuda triangle? β in life after death?
No, I reply. No, no, no, no, and again no.
One person recently, goaded into desperation by the litany of unrelieved negation, burst out "Don't you believe in anything?"
Yes", I said. "I believe in evidence. I believe in observation, measurement, and reasoning, confirmed by independent observers. I'll believe anything, no matter how wild and ridiculous, if there is evidence for it. The wilder and more ridiculous something is, however, the firmer and more solid the evidence will have to be.
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Isaac Asimov
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Wealth File
1. Rich people believe "I create my life." Poor people believe "Life happens to me."
2. Rich people play the money game to win. Poor people play the money game to not lose.
3. Rich people are committed to being rich. Poor people want to be rich.
4. Rich people think big. Poor people think small.
5. Rich people focus on opportunities. Poor people focus on obstacles.
6. Rich people admire other rich and successful people. Poor people resent rich and successful people.
7. Rich people associate with positive, successful people. Poor people associate with negative or unsuccessful people.
8. Rich people are willing to promote themselves and their value. Poor people think negatively about selling and promotion.
9. Rich people are bigger than their problems. Poor people are smaller than their problems.
10. Rich people are excellent receivers. Poor people are poor receivers.
11. Rich people choose to get paid based on results. Poor people choose to get paid based on time.
12. Rich people think "both". Poor people think "either/or".
13. Rich people focus on their net worth. Poor people focus on their working income.
14. Rich people manage their money well. Poor people mismanage their money well.
15. Rich people have their money work hard for them. Poor people work hard for their money.
16. Rich people act in spite of fear. Poor people let fear stop them.
17. Rich people constantly learn and grow. Poor people think they already know.
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T. Harv Eker (Secrets of the Millionaire Mind: Mastering the Inner Game of Wealth)
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All depression has its roots in self-pity, and all self-pity is rooted in people taking themselves too seriously.β
At the time Switters had disputed her assertion. Even at seventeen, he was aware that depression could have chemical causes.
βThe key word here is roots,β Maestra had countered. βThe roots of depression. For most people, self-awareness and self-pity blossom simultaneously in early adolescence. It's about that time that we start viewing the world as something other than a whoop-de-doo playground, we start to experience personally how threatening it can be, how cruel and unjust. At the very moment when we become, for the first time, both introspective and socially conscientious, we receive the bad news that the world, by and large, doesn't give a rat's ass. Even an old tomato like me can recall how painful, scary, and disillusioning that realization was. So, there's a tendency, then, to slip into rage and self-pity, which if indulged, can fester into bouts of depression.β
βYeah but Maestraββ
βDon't interrupt. Now, unless someone stronger and wiserβa friend, a parent, a novelist, filmmaker, teacher, or musicianβcan josh us out of it, can elevate us and show us how petty and pompous and monumentally useless it is to take ourselves so seriously, then depression can become a habit, which, in tern, can produce a neurological imprint. Are you with me? Gradually, our brain chemistry becomes conditioned to react to negative stimuli in a particular, predictable way. One thing'll go wrong and it'll automatically switch on its blender and mix us that black cocktail, the olβ doomsday daiquiri, and before we know it, weβre soused to the gills from the inside out. Once depression has become electrochemically integrated, it can be extremely difficult to philosophically or psychologically override it; by then it's playing by physical rules, a whole different ball game. That's why, Switters my dearest, every time you've shown signs of feeling sorry for yourself, I've played my blues records really loud or read to you from The Horseβs Mouth. And thatβs why when youβve exhibited the slightest tendency toward self-importance, Iβve reminded you that you and meβ you and I: excuse meβmay be every bit as important as the President or the pope or the biggest prime-time icon in Hollywood, but none of us is much more than a pimple on the ass-end of creation, so letβs not get carried away with ourselves. Preventive medicine, boy. Itβs preventive medicine.β
βBut what about self-esteem?β
βHeh! Self-esteem is for sissies. Accept that youβre a pimple and try to keep a lively sense of humor about it. That way lies graceβand maybe even glory.
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Tom Robbins (Fierce Invalids Home from Hot Climates)
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It still took years for me to let go of learned pattern's of behavior that negated my capacity to give and receive love. One pattern that made the practice of love especially difficult was my constantly choosing to be with men who were emotionally wounded, who were not that interested in loving, even though they desired to be loved. I wanted to know love but was afraid to be intimate. By choosing men who were not interested in being loving, I was able to practice giving love but always within an unfufilling context. Naturally, my need to receive love was not met. I got what I was accustomed to getting. Care and affection, usually mingled with a degree of unkindness, neglect, and on some occasions, out right cruelty.
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bell hooks (All About Love: New Visions)
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SEPTEMBER 1, 1939
I sit in one of the dives
On Fifty-second Street
Uncertain and afraid
As the clever hopes expire
Of a low dishonest decade:
Waves of anger and fear
Circulate over the bright
And darkened lands of the earth,
Obsessing our private lives;
The unmentionable odour of death
Offends the September night.
Accurate scholarship can
Unearth the whole offence
From Luther until now
That has driven a culture mad,
Find what occurred at Linz,
What huge imago made
A psychopathic god:
I and the public know
What all schoolchildren learn,
Those to whom evil is done
Do evil in return.
Exiled Thucydides knew
All that a speech can say
About Democracy,
And what dictators do,
The elderly rubbish they talk
To an apathetic grave;
Analysed all in his book,
The enlightenment driven away,
The habit-forming pain,
Mismanagement and grief:
We must suffer them all again.
Into this neutral air
Where blind skyscrapers use
Their full height to proclaim
The strength of Collective Man,
Each language pours its vain
Competitive excuse:
But who can live for long
In an euphoric dream;
Out of the mirror they stare,
Imperialism's face
And the international wrong.
Faces along the bar
Cling to their average day:
The lights must never go out,
The music must always play,
All the conventions conspire
To make this fort assume
The furniture of home;
Lest we should see where we are,
Lost in a haunted wood,
Children afraid of the night
Who have never been happy or good.
The windiest militant trash
Important Persons shout
Is not so crude as our wish:
What mad Nijinsky wrote
About Diaghilev
Is true of the normal heart;
For the error bred in the bone
Of each woman and each man
Craves what it cannot have,
Not universal love
But to be loved alone.
From the conservative dark
Into the ethical life
The dense commuters come,
Repeating their morning vow;
'I will be true to the wife,
I'll concentrate more on my work,'
And helpless governors wake
To resume their compulsory game:
Who can release them now,
Who can reach the dead,
Who can speak for the dumb?
All I have is a voice
To undo the folded lie,
The romantic lie in the brain
Of the sensual man-in-the-street
And the lie of Authority
Whose buildings grope the sky:
There is no such thing as the State
And no one exists alone;
Hunger allows no choice
To the citizen or the police;
We must love one another or die.
Defenseless under the night
Our world in stupor lies;
Yet, dotted everywhere,
Ironic points of light
Flash out wherever the Just
Exchange their messages:
May I, composed like them
Of Eros and of dust,
Beleaguered by the same
Negation and despair,
Show an affirming flame.
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W.H. Auden (Another Time)