Michele Borba Quotes

People seldom improve when they have no model to copy but themselves.-- Anonymous

Empathy is the one human capacity that allows us to link minds and hearts across cultures and generations to transform our lives.

Self-absorption in all its forms kills empathy, let alone compassion. When we focus on ourselves, our world contracts as our problems and preoccupations loom large. But when we focus on others, our world expands.

Empathy can be instilled, and it is composed of teachable habits that can be developed, practiced, and lived. Empathy is what lays the foundation for helping children live one essential truth: We are all humans who share the same fears and concerns, and deserve to be treated with dignity.

If your child had only your behavior to watch, what would he see? Which of your behaviors does he copy most? Smoking a cigarette? Gossiping? Reading a book? Exercising? Singing? Drinking? Telling racial jokes? Swearing? Is it an image that you want your kid to copy? If not, what can you do to improve it so your kid has a better example?

We are all humans who share the same fears and concerns, and deserve to be treated with dignity.

What would you like your greatest legacy to be for your child? What will you do to ensure that your child attains that legacy? Write a letter to yourself describing your hopes and dreams for your child---the legacy you would like to leave. Reread your letter often.

When you look in that mirror, do you see a person who uses your kids as a pawn in your quarrels with your partner? Do you try to get your kids to take sides, confide in them about adult issues, or manipulate them in your own domestic war? Ring any bells? If so, think how it is damaging your child. What will you do to change?

No behavior problem is just the kid's problem; it's also a family problem. To help your child best, you need to step back and look at the big picture and ask, "What are all the factors that might be causing my child to misbehave?" The place to start is by taking a good, honest look in the mirror. The image you project can have an enormous influence on your child's behavior. After all, our image is reflected back to our kids, and what they see is what they copy. Before you start planning how to change your kid's behavior, take a serious look at your own.

How well do you take care of your appearance? Do you walk around the house with your hair uncombed and wear unkempt clothes? How well do you take care of your health? Your stress? Do you go to pieces, have an extra drink, start screaming and yelling when the pressures of family, work and parenting get to be too much? Or can you hold it together, take a nap, go for a walk, kiss your husband, practice yoga, exercise, or make a joke? How well do you take care of your spirituality? Your intellectual growth? Your interests? How do they affect your child? you do to nourish the images that are most important to you?

We’re lonely because we’re so immersed in social media and losing face-to-face connection.

Our lives are crammed, but we’re social beings with no time for friends and lonely.” “We are forced to grow up too quickly and need more time to be kids and have friends.

Applying the science of resilience can help all kids thrive; it just requires switching our mind-set. Instead of using interventions and a “fix the kid” mentality, we teach children protective factors so they can maintain strength in uncertain, challenging times and become their personal best.

Kids are just plain happier when they honor who they are and then perform in areas that nurture their strengths.

kids who thrive have parents who cultivate their child’s talents because those talents are part of who their child naturally is, not because those talents support the parents’ interests and longings.

Character is what builds inner strength, genuineness, and wholeness and helps turn kids who strive for the next gold ring into young adults who thrive in a fast-paced, ever-changing world. When kids are missing character strengths like optimism, curiosity, empathy, and perseverance their development is incomplete

Hostility gives way when groups pull together to achieve overriding goals that are real and compelling to all concerned,” Sherif explained.29 It’s an important finding to remember. A key to

Learn to set clear boundaries and firm limits, take back your control, and realize that what your child needs most is a parent and not a friend.

Learn to relax a bit more, realize when you’re being too protective so that your child learns to face life, and handle your own worries so that you don’t pass your fears to your child.

But there’s another danger: all that “plugged-in” time means less face-to-face time with us. Once we take a “secondary” role in our child’s eyes, we begin to lose our power, and the prevailing culture becomes our substitute. Your child becomes more vulnerable to outside pressures; he is more likely to rely on someone other than you to guide him, and more likely to adopt others’ values.

Teens eat, bunk, talk, and play together; team-building challenges help them rely on one another, and activities help them find creative solutions together.