Kubur Quotes

saudara-saudara kita menjadi tameng api neraka kita , maka berbuat baiklah pada mereka ...sungguh, saudara kita akan menjadi penghalang siksa dan azab himpitan liang kubur..

Ingatlah! Bahwa dari dalam kubur, suara saya akan lebih keras daripada dari atas bumi

Menurut survei: selain narik becak dan gali kubur, pekerjaan mengkhayal dan menulis ternyata juga butuh asupan kalori tinggi. (Perahu Kertas)

Al-Qur'an itu di alam kubur bisa memberi syafaat bagi pemiliknya, di akhirat juga memberi syafaat bagi pemiliknya.

Manusia akan melewati tiga pase kehidupan, pertama : kehidupan dunia, kedua : kehidupan alam barzakh (kubur), ketiga : kehidupan negri akhirat, dimana kehidupan di negri akhirat bersifat kekal abadi tidak akan binasa serta tidak akan berhenti

Ayahku memang tidak suka listrik. beliau punya keyakinan hidup dengan listrik akan mengundang keborosan cahaya. Apabila cahaya dihabiskan semasa hidup maka ayahku amat khawatir tidak ada lagi cahaya bagi beliau di alam kubur.

Meskipun ada mayat di dalam lubang kubur, tetap sulit menentukan siapa yang baru saja mati.

Tak ada hal yang paling ganjil dari realitas bahwa aku tidak memiliki diriku sendiri. Aku cuma sebatas apa yang orang lain pikirkan. Ini bukan sekedar kata kata yang terselip di dalam benak setiap orang, ini fakta yang ingin kita kubur dalam dalam. Aku tidak sedang berfilsafah tentang makna hidupku sendiri. Aku sedang mengorek luka yang berkecamuk di dalam benak semua orang. Kita pernah menjadi zombie sekali. Dan kita akan menjadi zombie di kesempatan yang lain. Zombie zombie bangkit dari kubur tidak sebagai orang mati. Tidak juga sebagai yang hidup. Mereka adalah perwujudan dari ketidakberdayaan manusia. Mereka menjelma jadi serigala yang lapar dan ingin menghisap darah dari kehidupan. Mereka tak sanggup hidup dalam arti hidup yang sesungguhnya. Mereka mati dalam kehinaan dan kesia siaan.

Sekian lama, aku sering lupa pada jalan yang tidak akan berkelok, tidak akan bersimpang lagi, Terus lurus ke kubur, di sanalah aku akan berhenti. (Ke Mana Aku Akan Pergi)

Kejar apa yang kau mau, setelah lelah, kembali kesini katakan rupa kekecewaan, biar ku kubur itu bersama hati dan kepalamu selepas shubuh

When we lack self-understanding, we are more likely to choose a partner or relationship as a response to our wounds, insecurities, or modeled behavior.

We may not choose to be in a burning room, but our inaction, our neglect to extinguish the flames, becomes a decision.

Hard truth: if you're not honest about the story that got you here you'll never change the narrative.

Tuan-Tuan, aku tidak ingin disebut seorang veteran. Sampai masuk ke liang kubur aku ingin menjadi pejuang ubtuk Republik Indonesia - Dr. Douwes Dekker

Emotions Individuals who experience self-loss often struggle to self-regulate, self-soothe, or emotionally connect—they lack inner grounding. As a consequence, they begin to cope through mechanisms of avoidance, suppression, or escapism.

To summarize thus far, the Self entails three key ingredients: freedom, choice, and responsibility. We create our sense of Self with the choices we make, the sense of responsibility with which we approach our existence, and the way we use our freedom despite our constraints.

It’s possible to shatter a rock, and impossible to break water. Many people’s idea of the Self is like a rock. Something that must be formed, “set,” and unmovable. And yet, the Self is more like water—flowing, changing, navigating around the things in its path. Your fluidity is your power, not your weakness.

Entering a relationship means letting the others be themselves. Respecting them in their existence, allowing their existence to be in my existence. Giving them room and space to be in my life.

terhempas, takluk, digerus dingin angin, suara truk, debu menyelip di mataku betapa dancuk hidup ini! betapa dancuk lonte yang setengah mati kukasihi dan menusukku dari belakang! betapa dancuk Tuhan! bergetar, mabuk bayang-bayang, tuak kegelapan, mabuk keramaian yang kubenci, mengambang, tersesat, terhisap angin, luka menganga, nanah tembaga meleleh dari lutut Apolo emas yang dipenggal sebelum perang meledak; sulap kata-kata Homer dengan mata piceknya. terkutuklah bayangan, pohon-pohon meronta karena tak ada satu pun cuaca baik menawarkan minuman dari langit. aku biarkan itu semua menyalipku, dalam metafora, mata binatang, bibir lebar mirip kemaluan wanita sombong yang merasa imannya takkan tumbang meski dijejali kata-kata jorok nan mesum. bergerak, tenggelam, sinar patah di lingkar air dalam gelas mineral yang kokoh dan kau bilang air abadi dan kau bilang api bisa mati sendiri terkutuklah engkau yang menelan masa laluku dan menghibahkan kehancuran ini lobang nganga di dadaku. oh, kau yang memuntahkan abu tulangku, yang akan tetap kuingat meski Tuhan atau apapun itu menyeretku ke neraka omong kosong di alam kubur dan bertanya bagaimana imanku sebenarnya. oh, terkutuklah engkau!

When we experience self-loss, we often don’t participate with intention or discernment, and, as a result, we struggle to defend or accept not just our circumstances, consequences, or responsibilities, but who we are.

Ingat, janji kita bulan lalu. Siapapun di antara kita yang menikah lebih dahulu wajib membayar nazar berlari stadion kampus lima keliling. Siapapun yang pertama kali dapat pekerjaan, gaji pertamanya wajib dipakai untuk borong gerobak es tebu. Siapapun nanti yang petama kali punya anak laki-laki, wajib namanya diambil dari singkatan nama kita berempat. Bukankah gitu, brother.” Celetuk Ilham yang kembali pada topik awal. “Dan siapapun yang pertama kali meninggal dunia di antara kita berempat, tiga orang tersisa wajib untuk menemani, mengafani dan menyalatkan hingga menggali liang kubur.” Sahut Toni yang entah mengapa terucap point perjanjian absurd itu.

Expose your Self to life! Listen, I get it, I know how vulnerable and scary it can be. Trust your Self enough to sense your own resonance, to know what experiences you want to have and—as important—what experiences you don’t want. Trust yourself to make decisions that serve you. No one else can understand what it means to be you or live your life. It’s an intimate knowing that only you are privy to.

It often manifests as a go-getter mentality. You may clean constantly, belong to a bunch of clubs, strive for perfection (so no one can complain or fault you), stay distracted by constantly being “busy” in order to impress others and increase your value in their eyes. But you are functioning almost like a cog in a machine, acting, having little to no inner experience. You are so busy that you don’t interact with or respond to what is really going on for you. You become like a shell that has no concern for—or even awareness of—the animal that lives within it. If this coping mechanism could talk, according to Längle, it would sound something like: “I need to constantly be doing something visible in order to legitimate myself for others, so that I can live!” Instead of stepping back or tapping out, as we do when we distance our Self, this reaction sends us barreling forward, becoming more active as a way to cope with the threat. This is not that different from people-pleasing: It is focusing on, or conforming to, the other in order to avoid genuine encounters. We want recognition from others because we cannot offer it to our Self.

Sara Kuburic’s thoughtful self-help book It’s on Me: Embrace Hard Truths, Discover Your Self and Change Your Life. (For the best introduction to the milieu and message of the existentialists, read Sarah Bakewell’s At the Existentialist Café: Freedom, Being and Apricot Cocktails.) Robert Saltzman’s book The Ten Thousand Things is the source of his quoted observations on our inability to control the future, and is full of similarly pithy, no-nonsense insights into the vulnerability of our situation.

What am I feeling? What are the emotions (plural!) that are present, and what are they communicating to me? Are there any contradictory emotions? What is my body telling me about how I feel?

Dalam mulut musuh-Mu tiada satu pun yang benar begitu hatinya amat jahat kerongkongnya seperti kubur terbuka. (Mazmur VII)

Emotions are like a tide that will go in or out regardless of your permission. But instead of fighting, swimming against the current, and being tossed by the waves, allow their power and movement to buoy you, to take you toward your Self.

Appreciation is not the same as attention. We all (probably) know that being acknowledged—getting attention—isn’t the same thing as being valued. Appreciation is the step beyond mere acknowledgment. Once we are seen (truly seen), our inherent value also needs to be recognized.

Turning toward is also a way to offer and be offered approval, because it is a positive affirmation within itself. There is willingness and intention that is present with the motion; it’s like saying, “I am ready to set myself in motion and encounter you. What’s important to me is you!” It’s a form of self-transcendence, as well as a deeper embodiment of Self. In the process of turning toward someone, we can effectively determine if the relationship is valuable, and if we want to invest our time in it. Simply, it’s assessing our inner resources—our capacity to give time, closeness, and attention. When we turn toward something painful, such as grief, we evaluate whether we are able to cope with internal or external losses.

Bottom line: In order to be our Self, we must feel. This is why we are all looking to experience something in our lives, regardless of whether we are seeking it on a date, in our careers, or through our children. Most of us are desperate to feel life, but also terrified by the prospect. So we often keep our Self at arm’s length. Some of us have chosen to remain lost—emotionally unavailable—because we are too scared to face what, and who, we will find inside ourselves. Others have made an unconscious habit of numbing their emotions by having a packed social calendar, religiously drinking that one glass (or bottle) of wine as soon as they get home, or depending on social media to take their minds off things. We may not be aware of it, but most of us run on emotional autopilot. Most of us have not been taught or encouraged to observe, validate, or express our emotions, so it’s not surprising that we don’t know the person that embodies them, or that we don’t enjoy living our lives.

Everything you encounter—a chair, a painting, a glass of water, a sunset, a conversation, a stranger on the subway, yourself in the mirror after a night without sleep—is a gateway to understanding not just your world, but your Self. Our job is to remain willing to be moved, struck, by these encounters (whether they are with people, things, or ideas) and to try to understand what each instance wants to tell us.

There is sometimes too much emphasis placed on when, how, and why to cut people out of our lives, and I believe it’s important to acknowledge the types of people worth keeping close: People who tell us the truth People who encourage us People who model qualities we admire People who call us out (lovingly and respectfully) People who are willing to see us for who we are People who accept us People who respect us People who want what’s best for us

What beliefs about emotions are preventing me from embracing them? What is this emotion trying to tell me about myself? What is this feeling trying to tell me about the way I am engaging with others? How have I changed as a result of this feeling? What value is this emotion speaking to? What narrative am I holding on to? Why? Am I feeling more than one emotion?

It takes courage to be in the world—to actively engage with it moment to moment. It takes an incredible amount of courage to be your Self. I wonder what it would be like if we all, as a society, decided to appear rather than conceal or recoil. What would it be like to experience our Selves rather than carry the burden of our preconceived notions and expectations? What would it be like to let others see us, and be invited to see them? What would it be like if we all actually cared to truly see one another? What would it be like if we recognized that everything can tell us something both about it and about our Self?

What habits did you adopt because of your surroundings? What habits do not support who you are and who you want to become? Do you have any habits that sabotage you or your growth? What habits nurture you? What habits are encouraged by others? What we do is who we become. Habits are tendencies or practices that can become automatic to us.

We transform one emotion into a more acceptable one. Example: We may transform our anger into anxiety. If we grew up in a family that was uncomfortable with anger, or if our partner becomes aggressive as a response to signs of frustration, we may have learned that anxiety is a less dangerous, or a more acceptable, emotion. Sometimes, that’s self-preservation. Other times, we are allowing our lack of self-awareness to confuse the people around us. We want them to “know” why we are upset without actually telling them. We transfer frustrations. Let’s say your boss yelled at you. You understand that yelling at your boss is not an option because it would result in being fired. So you suppress your feelings and then go home and yell at your boyfriend. This is, of course, unfair. You’ve transferred your frustration from one person or thing to another—one who (likely) doesn’t deserve it.

Längle speaks about phenomenology in terms of gaining a deeper understanding of the world by allowing it to sink in, allowing our Self to be touched, and by being open to everything the world shows us (a form of mindful openness). We can only do this when we look with “disarmed” eyes, without any defensiveness or motivation to use something or someone. In order for the understanding to deepen, we must go “inward” and be conscious of the impact it’s having on us, and then go back “outward” to see more. We simultaneously have to grasp the impression the “other” has on us and how the other person appears to us.

We cannot expect attention without attendance. We must show ourself—our true Self—in order to be seen. If we are scared that there is “nothing” within us, we may desperately try to avoid having that reflected back to us. But the truth is, if we see “nothing,” then we are not looking at our Self. Instead, we’re probably blind to the Self—a thick veil of pain, denial, and failure prompting us to believe we’re hollow.

The act of living and creating our Self is inherently rewarding and fulfilling. And, in the same breath, such bravery—or, perhaps audacity—is often met with resistance, isolation, and grief. Every decision, even an authentic one, has a cost. This is why I want to normalize the price that comes with being your Self.

I wanted to swim without getting wet. I wanted self-awareness without the effort of self-reflection. I wanted others to see me authentically, even though I was still struggling—and didn’t really want—to see myself. Turning toward is a kind of emotional connection that requires a vulnerability and a willingness to show our feelings, but it also requires the “other” to have the willingness to receive and encounter what is being shown.

Our body, culture, history, and context not only shape who we are, but are who we are. I am me because of these things, not despite them. I am unique—my essence is an intersectionality exclusive to me (in this moment).

Sartre believed that we outsource our freedom by seeking structure and direction from institutions, families, social circles, or religions—from anyone or anything—to tell us who we are or who we ought to be. For Sartre, relying on any external suggestions and structures to tell us who we are is a form of self-deception (or what he called “bad faith”).

We frequently ask people for their opinions before we’ve even taken the time to establish our own. Yes, it’s okay to ask for advice, although, very often we are not looking for a perspective or wisdom, but rather an alleviation from the burden of constantly making decisions.

Are we surrendering our freedom because we don’t want to deal with the responsibility of making choices? Are we more comfortable with someone telling us who we are than with figuring it out for ourselves?

Our past, no matter how painful, can never fully define us, because it doesn’t take into account our future—that is, unless we let it.

Manusia adalah ciptaan yang salah kedaden. Produk gagal yang kemudian merajalela dengan kebrutalan, bahkan terhadap sesama.

Remember, freedom does not imply that we have no constraints; freedom implies that we have a certain relationship with our “givens.” Sartre said, “Freedom is what we do with what is done to us.” And Frankl perfectly summarized this relationship by saying: “It is not freedom from conditions, but it is freedom to take a stand toward the conditions.” His positioning is as firm as Sartre’s—he doesn’t call us condemned, but he states that human beings are always free (even if the freedom looks different for each circumstance). Martin Heidegger, a German philosopher who is regarded as one of the most important philosophers of the twentieth century, similarly suggested that the Self (what he called Dasein, which translates as “being there” or “to be there”) is a dynamic between who we are at this very moment and who we can and will be as time goes on. We are constantly straddling what has happened and what hasn’t happened yet, and all the possibilities that remain. One could say that we are everything that’s happened and everything that will happen. There is something liberating about knowing there is always more that we will become. As long as we are alive, we will never stop becoming; never stop having the ability to create our Self. It really puts our “givens” into a helpful perspective

Kata bang bokir, semalam Suzana bangkit dari kuburnya, ia lupa ngangkat jemuran ternyata.

Self-loss, on the other hand, is often why we fail to communicate and set boundaries, why we hold on to beliefs that no longer serve us, why we struggle in relationships, why we are overwhelmed or scared to make decisions, why self-love is so goddamn difficult, and finally, why so many of us fail to find meaning and purpose in our lives.

We do not lose our Self without our permission or participation. We may not choose to be in a burning room, but our inaction, our neglect to extinguish the flames, becomes a decision. It may be our lack of awareness, a particularly unhealthy environment or relationship, or an old wound that drives the estrangement in the first place.

Inner consent is our willingness to say yes to life—saying yes to our thoughts, values, emotionality, who we are, what matters to us, our convictions, our personal uniqueness, our attitude, our purpose. It is the practice of tuning in and evaluating whether something aligns or is in harmony with who we understand our Self to be. When you look in the mirror, can you stand behind (and endorse) the person staring back at you and the way you show up from moment to moment? Can you feel at peace with your actions, even if others don’t like them? Are you living your truth? Are you inspired by the life you’re leading? Giving inner consent is a necessary, ongoing practice because our existence happens as an accumulation of instances. It’s not enough to just give our consent to a few big, life-altering decisions or events. If we don’t consent to life incrementally, it may be more difficult to consent to the life we are living as a whole.

I will be there for myself. I will no longer be a passive observer in my own damn life.

Self-loss is what I believe to be at the core of so much of our human suffering. Although most of us can intuitively grasp what the phrase “self-loss” means, it’s likely that we’ve never heard of it or had it explained. Self-loss is our failed responsibility to BE our Self.

As a result of not knowing who we are, we: Self-sabotage and hurt ourselves unintentionally. Struggle to identify and verbalize what we need, think, or how we feel. Find ourselves living a life that we don’t want or don’t find fulfilling. Prioritize others over ourselves. Stay in relationships that we are not meant to be in. Get caught in cycles of reenacting unhealthy patterns. Are unable to identify our purpose or direction in life. Fail at setting and maintaining boundaries. Are faced with a deep sense of unhappiness. Grapple with our self-esteem. Are constantly overwhelmed or disappointed by life. Find it hard, ultimately, to truly connect with, accept, and trust who we are.