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that is what migrations and relocations do to us: when you leave your home for unknown shores, you donβt simply carry on as before; a part of you dies inside so that another part can start all over again.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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You don't share a language, you think, and then you realise, grief is a language. We understand each other, people with troubled pasts.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Some day this pain will be useful to you.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Because in real life, unlike in history books, stories come to us not in their entirety but in bits and pieces, broken segments and partial echoes, a full sentence here, a fragment there, a clue hidden in between. in life, unlike in books, we have to weave our stories out of threads as fine as the gossamer veins that run through a butterfly's wings.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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The world is unfair, said Meryem. "If a stone falls on an egg, it is bad for the egg; if an egg falls on a stone, it is still bad for the egg.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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People assume itβs a matter of personality, the difference between optimists and pessimists. But I believe it all comes down to an inability to forget. The greater your powers of retention, the slimmer your chances at optimism.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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anyone who expects love to be sensible has perhaps never loved.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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A map is a two-dimensional representation with arbitrary symbols and incised lines that decide who is to be our enemy and who is to be our friend, who deserves our love and who deserves our hatred and who, our sheer indifference. Cartography is another name for stories told by winners. For stories told by those who have lost, there isnβt one.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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If you weep for all the sorrows in this world, in the end you will have no eyes.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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To immigrants and exiles everywhere,
the uprooted, the re-rooted, the rootless,
And to the trees we left behind,
rooted in our memories ...
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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If families resemble trees, as they say, arborescent structures with entangled roots and individual branches jutting out at awkward angles, family traumas are like thick, translucent resin dripping from a cut in the bark. They trickle down generations.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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I wish I could have told him that loneliness is a human invention. Trees are never lonely. Humans think they know with certainty where there being ends and someone else's starts. With there roots tangled and caught up underground, linked to fungi and bacteria, trees harbour no such illusions. For us, everything is interconnected.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Love is the bold affirmation of hope.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Wherever there is a war and painful partition, there will be no winners, human or otherwise.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Where do you start someone's story when life has more then one thread and what we call birth is not the only beginning, nor is death exactly an end.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Listen, canim, I know you might get cross with me for saying this, but remember, good advice is always annoying and bad advice never is. So if what I say irritates you, take it as good advice.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Iβve been thinking that you are my country. Is that a strange thing to say? Without you, I donβt have a home in this world; I am a felled tree, my roots severed all round; you can topple me with the touch of a finger.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Humans are strange that way, full of contradictions. It's as if they need to hate and exclude as much as they need to love and embrace.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Perhaps in a world bound with rules and regulations that made little sense, and usually privileged a few over the many, madness was the only true freedom.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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But if you are going to claim, as humans do, to be superior to all life forms, past and present, then you must gain an understanding of the oldest living organisms on earth who were here long before you arrived and will still be here after you have gone.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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bridges appear in our lives only when we are ready to cross them.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Love is the bold affirmation of hope. You don't embrace hope when death and destruction are in command. You don't put on your best dress and tuck a flower in your hair when you are surrounded by ruins and shards. You don't lose your heart at a time when hearts are supposed to remain sealed, especially for those who are not of your religion, not of your language, not of your blood. You don't fall in love in Cyprus in the summer of 1974. Not here, not now. And yet there they were, the two of them.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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So I guess it is in my genes, this melancholy I can never quite shake off. Carved with an invisible knife into my arborescent skin.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Maybe we give other names to grief because we are too scared to call it by its name.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Sometimes family trauma skips a generation altogether and redoubles its hold on the following one. You may encounter grandchildren who silently shoulder the hurts and sufferings of their grandparents.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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You see, there are two kinds: the surface and the deep water. Now, Aphrodite emerged from foam, remember? Foam love is a nice feeling, but just as superficial. When itβs gone, itβs gone, nothing remains. Always aim for the kind of love that comes from the deep.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Superstitions are the shadows of fears unknown.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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She was no part of anything. In her unbroken loneliness, she was complete. Never had she felt so exposed, yet si powerful.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Time is a songbird, and just like any other songbird it can be taken captive. It can be held prisoner in a cage and for even longer than you might think possible. But time cannot be kept in check in perpetuity. No captivity is forever.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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But not everyone needs to be a warrior, my dear. Otherwise weβd never have poets, artists, scientists β¦β βI disagree,β said Defne into her wine glass. βThere are moments in life when everyone has to become a warrior of some kind. If you are a poet, you fight with your words; if you are an artist, you fight with your paintings β¦ But you canβt say, βSorry, Iβm a poet, Iβll pass.β You donβt say that when thereβs so much suffering, inequality, injustice.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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It crossed his mind that maybe one of the most telling differences between the young and the old lay in this detail. As you aged you cared less and less about what others thought of you, and only then could you be more free.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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She could detect other peopleβs sadnesses the way one animal could smell another of its kind a mile away.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Wisdom consists of ten parts: nine parts of silence, one part of words.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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The places where we were born are the shape of our lives, even when we are away from them.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Truth is a rhizome β an underground plant stem with lateral shoots. You need to dig deep to reach it and, once unearthed, you have to treat it with respect.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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legends are there to tell us what history has forgotten.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Today, I think of fanaticism β of any type β as a viral disease.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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An ancient clay tablet read, 'the Babylonian mosquito devil is now in my land; he has slain all the men of my country'. Well, it would have been more accurate if it said, 'she has slain...', as it is the female of the species that causes the carnage, but I guess it's not the first time women have been written out of history.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Humans tell their children to paint the earth in one colour alone. They imagine the sky in blue, the grass in green, the sun in yellow, and the earth entirely in brown. If only they knew they have rainbows under their feet.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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At the end of the day, we all remember for the same reason we try to forget: to survive in a world that neither understands nor values us.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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What would we do, each of us, if we were young people in 1930s Burgos, caught up in the midst of civil war? Itβs easy to claim in hindsight weβd do the right thing. But, in truth, none of us knows where we would be when the fire is raging.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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He knew, even back then, that she was prone to bouts of melancholy. It came to her in successive waves, an ebb and flow. When the first wave arrived, barely touching her toes, it was so light and translucent a ripple that you might be forgiven for thinking it insignificant, that it would vanish soon, leaving no trace. But then followed another wave, and the next one, rising as far as her ankles, and the one after that covering her knees, and before you knew it she was immersed in liquid pain, up to her neck, drowning. That's how depression sucked her in.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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It is a map, the body of an ex-lover, pulling you into its depths and bringing you back to a part of yourself that you thought had been left behind sometime, somewhere. It is a mirror too, though, chipped and cracked, showing all the ways you have changed; and, like every mirror, it dreams of becoming whole again.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Not a very sensible thing to do, I admit, to fall for someone who is not of your kind, someone who will only complicate your life, disrupt your routine and mess with your sense of stability and rootedness. But, then again, anyone who expects love to be sensible has perhaps never loved.
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How amazing was this ability to achieve plenty by achieving little, to go home empty-handed yet still satisfied at the end of the day!
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Elif Shafak (The Bastard of Istanbul: The powerful novel about family secrets from the award-winning author of The Island of Missing Trees)
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because that is what nature did to death, it transformed abrupt endings into a thousand new beginnings.
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Trees might not have eyes but we have vision.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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What I meant was, some people stand in front of a tree and the first thing they notice is the trunk. These are the ones who prioritize order, safety, rules, continuity. Then there are those who pick out the branches before anything else. They yearn for change, a sense of freedom. And then there are those who are drawn to the roots, though concealed under the ground. They have a deep emotional attachment to their heritage, identity, traditions β¦
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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They ooze down slowly, a flow so slight as to be imperceptible, moving across time and space, until they find a crack in which to settle and coagulate. The path of an inherited trauma is random; you never know who might get it, but someone will.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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I believe one reason why humans find it hard to understand plants is because, in order to connect with something other than themselves and genuinely care about it, they need to interact with a face, an image that mirrors theirs as closely as possible.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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There was something childlike in the way grown-ups had a need for stories. They held a naive belief that by telling an inspiring anecdote-the right fable at the right time-they could lift their children's moods, motivate them to great achievements and simply change reality. There was no point in telling them that life was more complicated than that and words less magical than they presumed.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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I reminded myself that life was not a trade agreement, a calculated give-and-take, and not every affection needed to be returned in kind,
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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was it also possible to inherit something as intangible and immeasurable as sorrow?
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Arriving there is what you are destined for, But do not hurry the journey at all β¦
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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A map is a two-dimensional representation with arbitrary symbols and incised lines that decide who is to be our enemy and who is to be our friend, who deserves our love and who deserves our hatred and who, our sheer indifference.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Because in real life, unlike in history books, stories come to us not in their entirety but in bits and pieces, broken segments and partial echoes, a full sentence here, a fragment there, a clue hidden in between.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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I listened to her with respect, knowing what resilient migrants they are, seen almost everywhere across the globe. They can fly for an impressive 2,500 miles. I have never understood why humans regard butterflies as fragile. Optimists they may be, but fragile, never!
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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When you are in trouble or at your lowest point, and have no one in whom to confide, a hawthorn would be the right choice. There is a reason why hawthorns are home to fairies and known to protect pots of treasure. For wisdom, try a beech; for intelligence, a pine; for bravery, a rowan; for generosity, a hazel; for joy, a juniper; and for when you need to learn to let go of what you cannot control, a birch with its white-silver bark, peeling and shedding layers like old skin. Then again, if it's love you're after, or love you have lost, come to the fig, always the fig.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Throughout my long life, I have observed, again and again, this psychological pendulum that drives human nature. Every few decades they sway into a zone of unbridled optimism and insist on seeing everything through a rosy filter, only to be challenged and shaken by events and catapulted back into their habitual apathy and listless indifference.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Life below the surface is neither simple nor monotonous. The subterranean, contrary to what most people think, is bustling with activity. As you tunnel deep down, you might be surprised to see the soil take on unexpected shades. Rusty red, soft peach, warm mustard, lime green, rich turquoise β¦ Humans teach their children to paint the earth in one colour alone. They imagine the sky in blue, the grass in green, the sun in yellow and the earth entirely in brown.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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First-generation immigrants... Both eternally grateful for the chances life has given them and scarred by what it has snatched away, always out of place, separated from others by some unspoken experience, like survivors of a car accident.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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At night we heard the howling of the gale and it brought to mind things untamed and unbidden, things within each of us that we were not yet ready to face, let alone comprehend.
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trees of different species show solidarity with one another regardless of their differences, which is more than you can say for so many humans.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Where do you start someoneβs story when every life has more than one thread and what we call birth is not the only beginning, nor is death exactly an end?
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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The places where we were born are the shape of our lives, even when we are away from them. Especially then. Now
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Cartography is another name for stories told by winners. For stories told by those who have lost, there isnβt one.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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As you aged you cared less and less about what others thought of you, and only then could you be more free.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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The places where we were born are the shape of our lives, even when we are away from them.
Especially then.
Now and again in my sleep I find myself in Nicosia, standing under a familiar sun, my shadow falling against the rocks, reaching towards the prickly broom bushes that burst with blossoms, each as perfect and bright as the golden coins in a children's fable.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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We are scared of happiness, you see. From a tender age we have been taught that in the air, in the Etesian wind, an uncanny exchange is at work, so that for every morsel of contentment there will follow a morsel of suffering, for every peal of laughter there is a drop of tear ready to roll, because that is the way of this strange world, and hence we try not to look too happy, even on days when we might feel so inside.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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When elderly Cypriot women wish ill on someone, they don't ask for anything blatantly bad to befall them. They don't pray for lightning bolts, unforseen accidents or sudden reversals of fortune. They simply say,
May you never be able to forget.
May you go to your grave still remembering.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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remote and seemingly lone trees were not as badly affected as those living together in close proximity. Today, I think of fanaticism β of any type β as a viral disease. Creeping in menacingly, ticking like a pendulum clock that never winds down, it takes hold of you faster when you are part of an enclosed, homogenous unit. Better to keep some distance from all collective beliefs and certainties, I always remind myself.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Hey, I am serious. And I want you to understand a fundamental rule about love. You see, there are two kinds: the surface and the deep water. Now, Aphrodite emerged from foam, remember? Foam love is a nice feeling, but just as superficial. When it's gone, it's gone, nothing remains. Always aim for the kind of love that comes from the deep.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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as with some trees β you canβt help feeling that they must be much older than their chronological age? Where do you start someoneβs story when every life has more than one thread and what we call birth is not the only beginning, nor is death exactly an end?
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Did subsequent generations ineluctably start where previous ones had given up, absorbing all of their disappointments and unfulfilled dreams? Was the present moment a mere continuation of the past, every word an afterword to what had already been said or left unsaid?
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She was no part of this chain. She was no part of anything. In her unbroken loneliness, she was complete. Never had she felt so exposed, yet so powerful.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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If you cannot find a reason to love the life you are living, do not pretend to love the life you are living.
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Elif Shafak (The Bastard of Istanbul: The powerful novel about family secrets from the award-winning author of The Island of Missing Trees)
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Even trees of different species show solidarity with one another regardless of their differences, which is more than you can say for so many humans.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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One day youβll look back and say, why was I even worried about that?
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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wherever there is war and a painful partition, there will be no winners, human or otherwise.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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all happy families resemble one another, but each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.
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Elif Shafak (The Bastard of Istanbul: The powerful novel about family secrets from the award-winning author of The Island of Missing Trees)
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When you didnβt tell anyone the extraordinary, everyone assumed the normal,
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Elif Shafak (The Bastard of Istanbul: The powerful novel about family secrets from the award-winning author of The Island of Missing Trees)
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And what about our ancestors β can they, too, continue to exist through us? Is that why, when you meet some individuals β just as with some trees β you can't help feeling that they must be much older than their chronological age? Where do you start someone's story when every life has more than one thread and what we call birth is not the only beginning nor is death exactly an end?
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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A fig is not exactly a fruit, you see. It is a synconium β a fascinating structure that hides flowers and seeds in its cavity, with a barely visible opening through which wasps can enter and deposit their pollen. And sometimes, seizing the opportunity, ants, too, crawl through that opening and eat what they can.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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I want you to understand a fundamental rule about love. You see, there are two kinds: the surface and the deep water. Now, Aphrodite emerged from foam,remember? Foam love is a nice feeling, but just as superficial. When itβs gone itβs gone, nothing remains. Always aim for the kind of love that comes from the deep. β¦ foam love is interested in foam beauty. Sea love seeks sea beauty and you, my heart, deserve sea love, the strong and profound and enchanting type.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Arboreal-time is cyclical, recurrent, perennial; the past and the future breathe within this moment, and the present does not necessarily flow in one direction; instead it draws circles within circles, like the rings you find when you cut us down.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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The bodies of the missing, if unearthed, would be taken care of by their loved ones and given the proper burials they deserved. But even those who would never be found were not exactly foresaken. Nature tended to them. Wild thyme and sweet marjoram grew from the same soil, the ground splitting open like a crack in a window to make way for possibilities. Myriad birds, bats, and ants carried those seeds far away, where they would grow into fresh vegetation. In the most surprising ways, the victims continued to live. Because that it was nature did to death. It transformed abrupt endings into a thousand new beginnings.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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No storyteller is completely objective. But I have always tried to grasp every story through diverse angels, shifting perspectives, conflicting narratives. Truth is a rhizome β an underground plant stem with lateral shoots. You need to dig deep to reach it and, once unearthed, you have to treat it with respect.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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I wish I could have told him that loneliness is a human invention. Trees are never lonely. Humans think they know with certainty where their being ends and someone else's starts. With their roots tangled and caught up underground, linked to fungi and bacteria, trees harbour no such illusions. For us, everything is interconnected.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Time is a songbird, and just like any other songbird, it can be taken captive.
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Iβll come to the island,β Ada said, a new note in her voice. βI just want to meet islanders, like myself.
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Without understanding our past, how can we hope to shape our future?
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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The world is unfair,β said Meryem. βIf a stone falls on an egg, it is bad for the egg; if an egg falls on a stone, it is still bad for the egg.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Trees might not have eyes but we have vision. I respond to light. I detect ultraviolet and infrared and electromagnetic waves. If
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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house windows, offering furtive peeks into other peopleβs lives, which always seemed less complicated somehow, more exciting β happier.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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People from troubled islands can never be normal. We can pretend, we can even make amazing progress β but we can never really learn to feel safe. The ground that feels rock hard to others is choppy waters for our kind.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Human remains β¦ What exactly did that mean? Was it a few hard bones and soft tissue? Clothes and accessories? Things solid and compact enough to fit inside a coffin? Or was it rather the intangible β the words we send out into the ether, the dreams we keep to ourselves, the heartbeats we skip beside our lovers, the voids we try to fill and can never adequately articulate β when all was said and done, what was left of an entire life, a human being β¦ and could that really be disinterred from the ground?
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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They move with a slight ungainliness, not quite at ease in their surroundings. Both eternally grateful for the chances life has given them and scarred by what it has snatched away, always out of place, separated from others by some unspoken experience, like survivors of a car accident.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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The glint does not come from a living being, but from an antique pocket watch - eighteen-carat gold encased with mother of pearl, engraved with the lines from a poem:
"Arriving there is what you are destined for,
But do not hurry the journey at all..."
And there on the back are two letters, or more precisely, the same letter written twice:
Y & Y
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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Each time Kostas pushed her on the swing, watching her fly away from him, up into the air, laughing and kicking her legs, Ada would shout, βHigher, Daddy, higher!β Struggling with the fear that she might flip over or the metal chains might break off, he would push her harder, and then, as the swing came back, he would have to move out of the way to make space for her. And so it still was, this back and forth, with the father ceding space to his daughter so she could have her freedom.
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Elif Shafak (The Island of Missing Trees)
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When I am away from Sandhill, sometimes the picture of it comes drifting toward me- just the picture of it, like some sunny little island I have got to get back to. And there's my family. Most of the time I seem to see them sort of like a bunch of picnickers in a nineteenth century painting, sitting around in the grass with their picnic baskets and their pretty dresses and parasols, and floating past on that island. I think, I've got to get back. I think, they need me there and I have got to get back to them. But when I go back, they laugh at me and rumple my hair and ask why I;m such a worrier. And I can't tell them why. There's nothing I can tell them. Pretty soon I leave again, on account of seeing myself so weak and speechless and worried. I get to thinking about something I just miss like hell in another town, like this tree on a street in Atlanta that has a real electric socket in it, right in the trunk, or the trolley cars in Philadelphia making that faraway lonesome sound as they pass down an empty street in the rain, through old torn-down slum buildings with nothing but a wallpapered sheet of brick and a set of stone steps left standing...
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Anne Tyler (If Morning Ever Comes)