“
You and I do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.
”
”
Herb Cohen
“
No' is a reaction, not a position. The people who react negatively to your proposal simply need time to evaluate it and adjust their thinking. With the passage of sufficient time and repeated efforts on your part, almost every 'no' can be transformed into a 'maybe' and eventually a 'yes'.
”
”
Herb Cohen
“
Most of us, in our civilized society, rely too heavily on reasoning capacity to make things happen. We've been raised to believe that logic will prevail. Logic, in and of itself, will rarely influence people. Most often logic doesn't work.
”
”
Herb Cohen
“
Negotiation is a field of knowledge and endeavor that focuses on gaining the favor of people from whom we want things. It’s as simple as that.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
To successfully interact with any individual in any setup, all you have to do is determine his or her needs, then fulfill them.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Information. The other side seems to know more about you and your needs than you know about them and their needs.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Time. The other side doesn’t seem to be under the same kind of organizational pressure, time constraints, and restrictive deadlines you feel you’re under.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
In short, you have more power if you believe you have power and view your life’s encounters as negotiations.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
His response to any question is a counter-question.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
The secret of walking on water is knowing where the stones are.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
The “winners” seem to be people who not only are competent, but also have the ability to “negotiate” their way to get what they want.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
There’s a way to break out of this bind: Don’t act as though your limited experience represents universal truths. It doesn’t. Force yourself to go outside your own experience by vigorously testing your assumptions.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
if you happen to be a boss, you never want an employee to do exactly what you tell him to do. You want him to occasionally do what you don’t tell him to do … often what you can’t tell him to do, because many problems can’t be anticipated.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
In every negotiation in which you’re involved—in every negotiation in which I’m involved—in fact, in every negotiation in the world (from a diplomatic geopolitical negotiation to the purchase of a home)—three crucial elements are always present:
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Multiple plates full of colorful elements stared back at him. Beet-cured salmon sliced thinly, sitting atop Andean purple potatoes made into a crispy cake, crowned with a tiny salad of arugula, edible flowers, and passion-fruit-pickled shallot rings, which could all be picked up and eaten in one bite, was his nod to both the South American flavors Penelope had been teaching him and his own Jewish traditions. Next he'd created a Lapsang souchong tea-smoked pigeon breast with a tamarind sauce in a flaky, herbed pastry cup (a refined version of one of his pasties), and for dessert, a chili and cinnamon-infused chocolate bon bon filled with a horchata liquid caramel.
”
”
Jennieke Cohen (My Fine Fellow)
“
Because the plant is an herb, not a tree, the banana is properly classed as a berry. The plant grows from a rhizome, which, in the way of a potato, has no roots. It’s
”
”
Rich Cohen (The Fish That Ate the Whale: The Life and Times of America's Banana King)
Herb Cohen (Negotiate This!: By Caring, But Not T-H-A-T Much)
“
What really corrupts is not power, but a sense of powerlessness.
”
”
Herb Cohen (Negotiate This!: By Caring, But Not T-H-A-T Much)
“
Never take a risk out of pride, impatience, or a desire to get it over with.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Throughout this chapter, the point has been made that your winning in negotiations does not require someone to lose. Winning means managing the outcome by seeing your reality true and clear and being able to react with the appropriate strategy.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
in every negotiation in the world (from a diplomatic geopolitical negotiation to the purchase of a home)—three crucial elements are always present: Information. The other side seems to know more about you and your needs than you know about them and their needs. Time. The other side doesn’t seem to be under the same kind of organizational pressure, time constraints, and restrictive deadlines you feel you’re under. Power. The other side always seems to have more power and authority than you think you have.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
all power is based on perception. If you think you’ve got it, then you’ve got it. If you think you don’t have it, even if you have it, then you don’t have it.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Power. The other side always seems to have more power and authority than you think you have.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Your ability to negotiate determines whether you can or can’t influence your environment. It gives you a sense of mastery over your life.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
It’s analyzing information, time, and power to affect behavior … the meeting of needs (yours and others’) to make things happen the way you want them to.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
However, in dying, both gained the commitment of followers who carried on after them, changing the value system on the face of this earth. In fact, many of us try to live by their values in our daily lives.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
2. Almost everything is negotiable
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
He says, “Good … I’ll write up the sales slip.” You interject, “No … wait—maybe we can talk.” He arches an eyebrow and says, “When you and your wife finish discussing this, you’ll find me in Hardware,” and strolls away.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Now I ask you, will this be an easy or a difficult negotiation? Most people in our culture would say difficult. Why? Because of the great imbalance in information, apparent time pressure, and perceived power.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Information. What do you know about the salesman’s needs or the store’s needs? Is the salesman on salary, commission, or a combination of both? You don’t know.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Does he have a budget, a quota, or a deadline? You don’t know. Has he had a great month, or did his boss warn him to sell a refrigerator today “or else”? You don’t know.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
What’s the inventory situation on this model? Is it the store’s hottest item, currently on backorder, or is it a dog the store manager will dump at any price? You don’t know.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
What are the itemized costs on this model? You don’t know. Is the store making a profit on this model? If so, how much? You don’t know.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
But does the salesman know something about you? Yes.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
He knows you’re interested in the refrigerator. People may browse in the Sporting Goods, Clothing, or Stereo Departments at Sears, but not in the Large Appliances Department. They examine refrigerators when and because they need them.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Over and above this “given fact,” the salesman knows which nearby competitors sell refrigerators, whether they’re featuring special sales at present, and how much they’re charging.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Almost anything you and your spouse say furthers the informational imbalance and strengthens the salesman’s hand.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Note that the salesman never responds directly to any question that might give you information.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
If you ask, “I’m not saying I’ll buy this refrigerator, but if I do, when do you think you could deliver it?” he’ll say, “When would you like it delivered?” When you reply, “How about early this afternoon?” he’ll say, “Why so soon?” At that point one of you will comment, “Because we have about seventy dollars’ worth of food spoiling rapidly.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Does the salesman like this information? Yes, because you’ve exposed your deadline to him without knowing his.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Time. Compounding the expanding informational gap is the problem of organizational pressure and time. The salesman you’re dealing with seems relaxed. His organization isn’t visible.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
As a negotiator, take some risk, break free from the precedent of your past experiences, challenge your assumptions, raise your aspiration level, and increase your expectations.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Some things are not the product of a negotiation. The Ten Commandments was not a negotiated document. It’s certainly difficult to negotiate with the Lord when he presents you with a fait accompli etched in stone.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
Because so many things are negotiable doesn’t mean that you or I should negotiate all the time. If you were to ask me, “Do you negotiate with one-price stores? Do you negotiate with Sears?
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
I’d be perfectly frank with you and reply, “One of my life strategies is never to go into Sears.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
My point is, whether you do or don’t negotiate anything should be strictly up to you, based on your answers to the following questions: Am I comfortable negotiating in this particular situation? Will negotiating meet my needs? Is the expenditure of energy and time on my part worth the benefits that I can receive as a result of this encounter? Only if you, as a unique individual, can answer yes to all three of these questions should you proceed to negotiate. You should always have a sense of mastery over your situation. Pick and choose your opportunities based upon your needs. Don’t allow yourself to be manipulated or intimidated by those who aren’t concerned with your best interests. You have the freedom to choose your attitude toward any given set of circumstances and the ability to affect the outcome. In other words, you can play a much greater role than you thought in shaping your life and improving your lifestyle.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
There are many people with technical expertise who lack the negotiating skill needed to sell their ideas. As a result they feel frustrated.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)
“
What is negotiation? It is the use of information and power to affect behavior within a “web of tension.” If you think about this broad definition, you’ll realize that you do, in fact, negotiate all the time both on your job and in your personal life.
”
”
Herb Cohen (You Can Negotiate Anything: The Groundbreaking Original Guide to Negotiation)