β
Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I'm not living.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Why are they all staring?" demanded Albus as he and Rose craned around to look at the other students.
"Donβt let it worry you," said Ron. "Itβs me. Iβm extremely famous.
β
β
J.K. Rowling (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (Harry Potter, #7))
β
Don't you think it's better to be extremely happy for a short while, even if you lose it, than to be just okay for your whole life?
β
β
Audrey Niffenegger (The Time Traveler's Wife)
β
Talking to a drunk person was like talking to an extremely happy, severely brain-damaged three-year-old.
β
β
John Green (Paper Towns)
β
Why didn't I learn to treat everything like it was the last time. My greatest regret was how much I believed in the future.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Basically, I have two speeds.... Hostile or smart-aleck. Your choice.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
I regret that it takes a life to learn how to live.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Love is the extremely difficult realization that something other than oneself is real.
β
β
Iris Murdoch (Existentialists and Mystics: Writings on Philosophy and Literature)
β
The surest defense against Evil is extreme individualism, originality of thinking, whimsicality, evenβif you willβeccentricity.
β
β
Joseph Brodsky
β
The plain state of being human is dramatic enough for anyone; you don't need to be a heroin addict or a performance poet to experience extremity. You just have to love someone.
β
β
Nick Hornby (How to Be Good)
β
I hope that one day you will have the experience of doing something you do not understand for someone you love.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
All extremes of feeling are allied with madness.
β
β
Virginia Woolf (Orlando)
β
Why do beautiful songs make you sad?' 'Because they aren't true.' 'Never?' 'Nothing is beautiful and true.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
There were things I wanted to tell him. But I knew they would hurt him. So I buried them, and let them hurt me.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
I'm about to make a wild, extreme and severe relationship rule: the word busy is a load of crap and is most often used by assholes. The word "busy" is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. It seems like a good excuse, but in fact in every silo you uncover, all you're going to find is a man who didn't care enough to call. Remember men are never to busy to get what they want.
β
β
Greg Behrendt
β
I like to see people reunited, I like to see people run to each other, I like the kissing and the crying, I like the impatience, the stories that the mouth can't tell fast enough, the ears that aren't big enough, the eyes that can't take in all of the change, I like the hugging, the bringing together, the end of missing someone.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Songs are as sad as the listener.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
She wants to know if I love her, that's all anyone wants from anyone else, not love itself but the knowledge that love is there, like new batteries in the flashlight in the emergency kit in the hall closet.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
So many people enter and leave your life! Hundreds of thousands of people! You have to keep the door open so they can come in! But it also means you have to let them go!
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee.β
βWhoβs Bruce Lee?β
βWhoβs Bruce Lee?β Kenji asks, horrified. βOh my God. We canβt even be friends anymore.β
βWhy? Was he a friend of yours?β
βYou know what,β he says, βjust stop. JustβI canβt even talk to you right now.
β
β
Tahereh Mafi (Ignite Me (Shatter Me, #3))
β
Anyone who has ever struggled with poverty knows how extremely expensive it is to be poor.
β
β
James Baldwin
β
My life story is the story of everyone I've ever met.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
I had noticed that both in the very poor and very rich extremes of society the mad were often allowed to mingle freely.
β
β
Charles Bukowski (Ham on Rye)
β
Sometimes people hold a core belief that is very strong. When they are
presented with evidence that works against that belief, the new
evidence cannot be accepted. It would create a feeling that is
extremely uncomfortable, called cognitive dissonance. And because it
is so important to protect the core belief, they will rationalize,
ignore and even deny anything that doesn't fit in with the core belief.
β
β
Frantz Fanon (Black Skin, White Masks)
β
Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.
β
β
Dave Barry
β
Once you think a thought, it is extremely difficult to unthink it.
β
β
John Green (Let It Snow: Three Holiday Romances)
β
Humans are the only animal that blushes, laughs, has religion, wages war, and kisses with lips. So in a way, the more you kiss with lips, the more human you are. And the more you wage war.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
You're incredibly, absolutely, extremely, supremely, unbelievably different.
β
β
Kami Garcia (Beautiful Creatures (Caster Chronicles, #1))
β
I missed you even when I was with you. Thatβs been my problem. I miss what I already have, and I surround myself with things that are missing.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
I feel too much. That's what's going on.' 'Do you think one can feel too much? Or just feel in the wrong ways?' 'My insides don't match up with my outsides.' 'Do anyone's insides and outsides match up?' 'I don't know. I'm only me.' 'Maybe that's what a person's personality is: the difference between the inside and outside.' 'But it's worse for me.' 'I wonder if everyone thinks it's worse for him.' 'Probably. But it really is worse for me.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Although itβs good to try new things and to keep an open mind, itβs also extremely important to stay true to who you really are.
β
β
Gail Honeyman (Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine)
β
The need to go astray, to be destroyed, is an extremely private, distant, passionate, turbulent truth.
β
β
Georges Bataille
β
We had everything to say to each other, but no ways to say it
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Max, you're the last of the hybrids who still has...a soul.' ... 'She doesn't have soul,' Gazzy scoffed. 'Have you ever seen her dance?
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
A new experience can be extremely pleasurable, or extremely irritating, or somewhere in between, and you never know until you try it out.
β
β
Lemony Snicket (The Blank Book (A Series of Unfortunate Events))
β
I consider it an extremely dangerous doctrine, because the more likely we are to assume that the solution comes from the outside, the less likely we are to solve our problems ourselves.
β
β
Carl Sagan
β
Dogs do not have many advantages over people, but one of them is extremely important: euthanasia is not forbidden by law in their case; animals have the right to a merciful death.
β
β
Milan Kundera (The Unbearable Lightness of Being)
β
This calls for a very special blend of psychology and extreme violence.
β
β
Ben Elton (Bachelor Boys: The Young Ones Book)
β
Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
β
β
Groucho Marx
β
I hated myself for going, why couldn't I be the kind of person who stays?
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
They turned to Angel. "We will call you Little One," the leader said, obviously deciding to dispense with the whole confusing name thing.
"Okay," said Angel agreeably. "I'll call you Guy in a White Lab Coat." He frowned.
"That can be his Indian name," I suggested.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
Sensitive people usually love deeply and hate deeply. They don't know any other way to live than by extremes because thier emotional theromastat is broken.
β
β
Shannon L. Alder
β
What did thinking ever do for me, to what great place did thinking ever bring me? I think and think and think. I've thought myself out of happiness one million times, but never once into it.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
You looove me. (holds out arms) You love me this much.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
Be extremely subtle even to the point of formlessness. Be extremely mysterious even to the point of soundlessness. Thereby you can be the director of the opponent's fate.
β
β
Sun Tzu (The Art of War)
β
I would rather a romantic relationship turn into contempt than turn into apathy. The passion in the extremities make it appear as though it once meant something. We grow from hot or cold, but lukewarm is the biggest insult.
β
β
Criss Jami (Killosophy)
β
Just because you're an atheist, that doesn't mean you wouldn't love for things to have reasons for why they are.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
The mind can go either direction under stressβtoward positive or toward negative: on or off. Think of it as a spectrum whose extremes are unconsciousness at the negative end and hyperconsciousness at the positive end. The way the mind will lean under stress is strongly influenced by training.
β
β
Frank Herbert (Dune (Dune, #1))
β
Somebody who only reads newspapers and at best books of contemporary authors looks to me like an extremely near-sighted person who scorns eyeglasses. He is completely dependent on the prejudices and fashions of his times, since he never gets to see or hear anything else.
β
β
Albert Einstein
β
I felt suddenly shy. I was not used to shy. I was used to shame. Shyness is when you turn your head away from something you want. Shame is when you turn your head away from something you do not want.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
From the beginning men used God to justify the unjustifiable.
β
β
Salman Rushdie (The Satanic Verses)
β
Iβm about to make a wild, extreme, and severe relationship rule: THE WORD "BUSY" IS A LOAD OF CRAP AND IS MOST OFTEN USED BY ASSHOLES. The word βbusyβ is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. Remember: Men are never too busy to get what they want.
β
β
Greg Behrendt (He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys)
β
The mistakes I've made are dead to me. But I can't take back the things I never did.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
A girlβs got to use what sheβs given and Iβm not going to make a guy drool the way a Britney video does. So I take it to extremes. I donβt say I dress sexily on stage - what I do is so extreme. Itβs meant to make guys think: βI donβt know if this is sexy or just weird.
β
β
Lady Gaga
β
What I said yesterday didn't mean anything! I love everyone in the flock! Plus, it was the Valium talking!"
"Uh-huh. You just keep telling yourself that. You looove me."
Max: (tries to punch him)
"Pick a tree. I'll go carve our initials in it."
Max: (screams and runs into bathroom)
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
Dignity is as essential to human life as water, food, and oxygen. The stubborn retention of it, even in the face of extreme physical hardship, can hold a man's soul in his body long past the point at which the body should have surrendered it.
β
β
Laura Hillenbrand (Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience and Redemption)
β
I believe the simplest explanation is, there is no God. No one created the universe and no one directs our fate. This leads me to a profound realization that there probably is no heaven and no afterlife either. We have this one life to appreciate the grand design of the universe and for that, I am extremely grateful.
β
β
Stephen Hawking
β
I felt, that night, on that stage, under that skull, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone. I wondered, for the first time in my life, if life was worth all the work it took to live. What exactly made it worth it? What's so horrible about being dead forever, and not feeling anything, and not even dreaming? What's so great about feeling and dreaming?
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
I took the world into me, rearranged it, and sent it back out as a question: "Do you like me?
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
We need enormous pockets, pockets big enough for our families and our friends, and even the people who aren't on our lists, people we've never met but still want to protect. We need pockets for boroughs and for cities, a pocket that could hold the universe.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
I never confused what I had with what I was.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
The secret was a hole in the middle of me that every happy thing fell into.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
i donβt know what living a balanced life feels like
when i am sad
i donβt cry i pour
when i am happy
i donβt smile i glow
when i am angry
i donβt yell i burn
the good thing about
feeling in extremes
is when i love
i give them wings
but perhaps
that isn't
such a good thing
cause they always
tend to leave and
you should see me
when my heart is broken
i don't grieve
i shatter
β
β
Rupi Kaur (milk and honey)
β
I vill eat nine Snikuhs bahs visout bahfing
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
Fang felt a cold jolt, then dismissed it. Max wasnβt dead. He would know, somehow. He would have felt it. The world still felt the same to him; therefore, Max was still in it.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
Feathers filled the small room. Our laughter kept the feathers in the air. I thought about birds. Could they fly if there wasn't someone, somewhere, laughing?
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Being a geek is all about being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection. It means never having to play it cool about how much you like something. Itβs basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult. Being a geek is extremely liberating.
β
β
Simon Pegg
β
The Universe is very, very big.
It also loves a paradox. For example, it has some extremely strict rules.
Rule number one: Nothing lasts forever.
Not you or your family or your house or your planet or the sun. It is an absolute rule. Therefore when someone says that their love will never die, it means that their love is not real, for everything that is real dies.
Rule number two: Everything lasts forever.
β
β
Craig Ferguson (Between the Bridge and the River)
β
You can't love anything more than something you miss.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
I wanted to touch him, to tell him that even if everyone left everyone, I would never leave him, he talked and talked, his words fell through him, trying to find the floor to his sadness.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Meaning what? We're going to pretend nothing's going on? That's stupid. The only way to deal with any of this is to get it out in the open."
Have you been watching Oprah again?
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
He was not my boyfriend. On the other hand, he wasn't just a friend either. Instead, our relationship was elastic, stretching between those two extremes depending on who else was around, how much either of us had to drink, and other varying factors. This was exactly what I wanted, as commitments had never really been my thing. And it wasn't like it was hard, either. The only trick was never giving more than you were willing to lose.
β
β
Sarah Dessen (Lock and Key)
β
I don't damsel well. Distress, I can do. Damseling? Not so much.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
De tall, dark vun--dere's nothing special about him at all," ter Borcht said dismissively of Fang, who hadn't moved since the doctor had come in.
Well, he's a snappy dresser," I offered. One side of Fang's mouth quirked.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all,
And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.
I've heard it in the chilliest land
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.
β
β
Emily Dickinson (The Complete Poems of Emily Dickinson)
β
Oh, I will be cruel to you, Marya Morevna. It will stop your breath, how cruel I can be. But you understand, donβt you? You are clever enough. I am a demanding creature. I am selfish and cruel and extremely unreasonable. But I am your servant. When you starve I will feed you; when you are sick I will tend you. I crawl at your feet; for before your love, your kisses, I am debased. For you alone I will be weak.
β
β
Catherynne M. Valente (Deathless)
β
What are you doing here?β [ndr prison]
Selling Girl Scout cookies,β I said. βWant some? The Samoas are terrific.β
(Max II to Max)
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
So you have you price," I said with a mouthful of crumbs. "Your soul for a cookie." Fang made sure Dr. Martinez wasn't looking and then shot me the bird.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
Max, if you survive your final test, can you steal me one of those magic outfits for me?"
I'll try to get one for each of us. Hey! 'If'?
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
I did not need to know if he could love me.
I needed to know if he could need me.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
He promised us that everything would be okay. I was a child, but I knew that everything would not be okay. That did not make my father a liar. It made him my father.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
In bed that night I invented a special drain that would be underneath every pillow in New York, and would connect to the reservoir. Whenever people cried themselves to sleep, the tears would all go to the same place, and in the morning the weatherman could report if the water level of the Reservoir of Tears had gone up or down, and you could know if New York is in heavy boots.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Falling in love, we said; I fell for him. We were falling women. We believed in it, this downward motion: so lovely, like flying, and yet at the same time so dire, so extreme, so unlikely. God is love, they once said, but we reversed that, and love, like heaven, was always just around the corner. The more difficult it was to love the particular man beside us, the more we believed in Love, abstract and total. We were waiting, always, for the incarnation. That word, made flesh.
And sometimes it happened, for a time. That kind of love comes and goes and is hard to remember afterwards, like pain. You would look at the man one day and you would think, I loved you, and the tense would be past, and you would be filled with a sense of wonder, because it was such an amazing and precarious and dumb thing to have done; and you would know too why your friends had been evasive about it, at the time.
There is a good deal of comfort, now, in remembering this.
β
β
Margaret Atwood (The Handmaid's Tale)
β
America is the wealthiest nation on Earth, but its people are mainly poor, and poor Americans are urged to hate themselves. To quote the American humorist Kin Hubbard, 'It ainβt no disgrace to be poor, but it might as well be.' It is in fact a crime for an American to be poor, even though America is a nation of poor. Every other nation has folk traditions of men who were poor but extremely wise and virtuous, and therefore more estimable than anyone with power and gold. No such tales are told by the American poor. They mock themselves and glorify their betters. The meanest eating or drinking establishment, owned by a man who is himself poor, is very likely to have a sign on its wall asking this cruel question: 'if youβre so smart, why ainβt you rich?' There will also be an American flag no larger than a childβs hand β glued to a lollipop stick and flying from the cash register.
Americans, like human beings everywhere, believe many things that are obviously untrue. Their most destructive untruth is that it is very easy for any American to make money. They will not acknowledge how in fact hard money is to come by, and, therefore, those who have no money blame and blame and blame themselves. This inward blame has been a treasure for the rich and powerful, who have had to do less for their poor, publicly and privately, than any other ruling class since, say Napoleonic times. Many novelties have come from America. The most startling of these, a thing without precedent, is a mass of undignified poor. They do not love one another because they do not love themselves.
β
β
Kurt Vonnegut Jr. (Slaughterhouse-Five)
β
I wanted to tell her everything, maybe if I'd been able to, we could have lived differently, maybe I'd be there with you now instead of here. Maybe... if I'd said, 'I'm so afraid of losing something I love that I refuse to love anything,' maybe that would have made the impossible possible. Maybe, but I couldn't do it, I had buried too much too deeply inside me. And here I am, instead of there.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Fang: "There is one bright side to this."
Max: "Yeah? What's that?" The new and improved Erasers would mutilate us before they killed us?
Fang: *grins* You looove me. (holds out arms) You love me this much.
Max: My shriek of appalled rage would probably be heard in California, or maybe Hawaii.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
In his extreme youth Stoner had thought of love as an absolute state of being to which, if one were lucky, one might find access; in his maturity he had decided it was the heaven of a false religion, toward which one ought to gaze with an amused disbelief, a gently familiar contempt, and an embarrassed nostalgia. Now in his middle age he began to know that it was neither a state of grace nor an illusion; he saw it as a human act of becoming, a condition that was invented and modified moment by moment and day by day, by the will and the intelligence and the heart.
β
β
John Williams (Stoner)
β
Never assume that the person you are dealing with is weaker or less important than you are. Some people are slow to take offense, which may make you misjudge the thickness of their skin, and fail to worry about insulting them. But should you offend their honor and their pride, they will overwhelm you with a violence that seems sudden and extreme given their slowness to anger. If you want to turn people down, it is best to do so politely and respectfully, even if you feel their request is impudent or their offer ridiculous.
β
β
Robert Greene (The 48 Laws of Power)
β
Tell me again what we're doing here," I said, running a continuous scan of our surroundings.
Fang popped some Cracker Jack into his mouth. "We're here to watch manly men do manly things."
I followed Fang's line of sight: He was watching the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, who were not doing manly things, by any stretch of the imagination.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
You don't speak much, do you?" ter Borcht said, circling him slowly.
Fittingly, Fang said nothing.
Vhy do you let a girl be de leader?" ter Borcht asked, a calculating look in his eye.
She's the tough one," Fang said.
Dang right, I thought proudly.
Is dere anysing special about you?" asked ter Borcht. "Anysing vorth saving?"
Fang pretended to think, gazing up at the ceiling. "Besides my fashion sense? I play a mean harmonica.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
I thought about all of the things that everyone ever says to each other, and how everyone is going to die, whether it's in a millisecond, or days, or months, or 76.5 years, if you were just born. Everything that's born has to die, which means our lives are like skyscrapers. The smoke rises at different speeds, but they're all on fire, and we're all trapped.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
Fangβs hand gently smoothed my hair off my neck. My breath froze in my chest, and every sense seemed hyperalert. His hand stroked my hair again, so softly, and then trailed across my neck and shoulder and down my back, making me shiver.
I looked up. 'What the heck are you doing?'
'Helping you change your mind,' he whispered, and then he leaned over, tilted my chin up, and kissed me.
β
β
James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
β
What about little microphones? What if everyone swallowed them, and they played the sounds of our hearts through little speakers, which could be in the pouches of our overalls? When you skateboarded down the street at night you could hear everyone's heartbeat, and they could hear yours, sort of like sonar. One weird thing is, I wonder if everyone's hearts would start to beat at the same time, like how women who live together have their menstrual periods at the same time, which I know about, but don't really want to know about. That would be so weird, except that the place in the hospital where babies are born would sound like a crystal chandelier in a houseboat, because the babies wouldn't have had time to match up their heartbeats yet. And at the finish line at the end of the New York City Marathon it would sound like war.
β
β
Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close)
β
I am a sick man... I am a spiteful man. I am an unpleasant man. I think my liver is diseased. However, I don't know beans about my disease, and I am not sure what is bothering me. I don't treat it and never have, though I respect medicine and doctors. Besides, I am extremely superstitious, let's say sufficiently so to respect medicine. (I am educated enough not to be superstitious, but I am.) No, I refuse to treat it out of spite. You probably will not understand that. Well, but I understand it. Of course I can't explain to you just whom I am annoying in this case by my spite. I am perfectly well aware that I cannot "get even" with the doctors by not consulting them. I know better than anyone that I thereby injure only myself and no one else. But still, if I don't treat it, its is out of spite. My liver is bad, well then-- let it get even worse!
β
β
Fyodor Dostoevsky (Notes from Underground, White Nights, The Dream of a Ridiculous Man, and Selections from The House of the Dead)
β
The book itself is a curious artifact, not showy in its technology but complex and extremely efficient: a really neat little device, compact, often very pleasant to look at and handle, that can last decades, even centuries. It doesn't have to be plugged in, activated, or performed by a machine; all it needs is light, a human eye, and a human mind. It is not one of a kind, and it is not ephemeral. It lasts. It is reliable. If a book told you something when you were fifteen, it will tell it to you again when you're fifty, though you may understand it so differently that it seems you're reading a whole new book."
(Staying Awake: Notes on the alleged decline of reading, Harper's Magazine, February 2008)
β
β
Ursula K. Le Guin
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Certainly the most destructive vice if you like, that a person can have. More than pride, which is supposedly the number one of the cardinal sins - is self pity. Self pity is the worst possible emotion anyone can have. And the most destructive. It is, to slightly paraphrase what Wilde said about hatred, and I think actually hatred's a subset of self pity and not the other way around - ' It destroys everything around it, except itself '.
Self pity will destroy relationships, it'll destroy anything that's good, it will fulfill all the prophecies it makes and leave only itself. And it's so simple to imagine that one is hard done by, and that things are unfair, and that one is underappreciated, and that if only one had had a chance at this, only one had had a chance at that, things would have gone better, you would be happier if only this, that one is unlucky. All those things. And some of them may well even be true. But, to pity oneself as a result of them is to do oneself an enormous disservice.
I think it's one of things we find unattractive about the american culture, a culture which I find mostly, extremely attractive, and I like americans and I love being in america. But, just occasionally there will be some example of the absolutely ravening self pity that they are capable of, and you see it in their talk shows. It's an appalling spectacle, and it's so self destructive. I almost once wanted to publish a self help book saying 'How To Be Happy by Stephen Fry : Guaranteed success'. And people buy this huge book and it's all blank pages, and the first page would just say - ' Stop Feeling Sorry For Yourself - And you will be happy '. Use the rest of the book to write down your interesting thoughts and drawings, and that's what the book would be, and it would be true. And it sounds like 'Oh that's so simple', because it's not simple to stop feeling sorry for yourself, it's bloody hard. Because we do feel sorry for ourselves, it's what Genesis is all about.
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Stephen Fry
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Fang: βLet them blow up the world, and global-warm it, and pollute it. You and me and the others will be holed up somewhere, safe. Weβll come back out when theyβre all gone, done playing their games of world domination."
Max: βThatβs a great plan. Of course, by then we wonβt be able to go outside because weβll get fried by the lack of the ozone layer. Weβll be living at the bottom of the food chain because everything with flavor will be full of mercury or radiation or something! And there wonβt be any TV or cable because all the people will be dead! So our only entertainment will be Gazzy singing the constipation song! And there wonβt be amusement parks and museums and zoos and libraries and cute shoes! Weβll be like cavemen, trying to weave clothes out of plant fibers. Weβll have nothing! Nothing! All because you and the kids want to kick back in a La-Z-Boy during the most important time in history!β
Fang: βSo maybe we should sign you up for a weaving class. Get a jump start on all those plant fibers.β
Max: "I HATE YOU!!!"
Fang: "NO YOU DOOOOOON'T!!"
Voice: "You two are crazy about each other.
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James Patterson (Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports (Maximum Ride, #3))
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Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things donβt go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades β how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you. But itβs life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember β if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And thatβs where you want to be.
Disappointmentβ s cousin is Frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you donβt know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release. Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved β movies take a long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result β at least I was learning how to write scripts, having a side plan β I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life β friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.
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Chetan Bhagat
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That is the idea -- that we should all be wicked if we did not hold to the Christian religion. It seems to me that the people who have held to it have been for the most part extremely wicked. You find this curious fact, that the more intense has been the religion of any period and the more profound has been the dogmatic belief, the greater has been the cruelty and the worse has been the state of affairs. In the so-called ages of faith, when men really did believe the Christian religion in all its completeness, there was the Inquisition, with all its tortures; there were millions of unfortunate women burned as witches; and there was every kind of cruelty practiced upon all sorts of people in the name of religion.
You find as you look around the world that every single bit of progress in humane feeling, every improvement in the criminal law, every step toward the diminution of war, every step toward better treatment of the colored races, or every mitigation of slavery, every moral progress that there has been in the world, has been consistently opposed by the organized churches of the world. I say quite deliberately that the Christian religion, as organized in its churches, has been and still is the principal enemy of moral progress in the world.
You may think that I am going too far when I say that that is still so. I do not think that I am. Take one fact. You will bear with me if I mention it. It is not a pleasant fact, but the churches compel one to mention facts that are not pleasant. Supposing that in this world that we live in today an inexperienced girl is married to a syphilitic man; in that case the Catholic Church says, 'This is an indissoluble sacrament. You must endure celibacy or stay together. And if you stay together, you must not use birth control to prevent the birth of syphilitic children.' Nobody whose natural sympathies have not been warped by dogma, or whose moral nature was not absolutely dead to all sense of suffering, could maintain that it is right and proper that that state of things should continue.
That is only an example. There are a great many ways in which, at the present moment, the church, by its insistence upon what it chooses to call morality, inflicts upon all sorts of people undeserved and unnecessary suffering. And of course, as we know, it is in its major part an opponent still of progress and improvement in all the ways that diminish suffering in the world, because it has chosen to label as morality a certain narrow set of rules of conduct which have nothing to do with human happiness; and when you say that this or that ought to be done because it would make for human happiness, they think that has nothing to do with the matter at all. 'What has human happiness to do with morals? The object of morals is not to make people happy.
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Bertrand Russell (Why I Am Not a Christian and Other Essays on Religion and Related Subjects)
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All depression has its roots in self-pity, and all self-pity is rooted in people taking themselves too seriously.β
At the time Switters had disputed her assertion. Even at seventeen, he was aware that depression could have chemical causes.
βThe key word here is roots,β Maestra had countered. βThe roots of depression. For most people, self-awareness and self-pity blossom simultaneously in early adolescence. It's about that time that we start viewing the world as something other than a whoop-de-doo playground, we start to experience personally how threatening it can be, how cruel and unjust. At the very moment when we become, for the first time, both introspective and socially conscientious, we receive the bad news that the world, by and large, doesn't give a rat's ass. Even an old tomato like me can recall how painful, scary, and disillusioning that realization was. So, there's a tendency, then, to slip into rage and self-pity, which if indulged, can fester into bouts of depression.β
βYeah but Maestraββ
βDon't interrupt. Now, unless someone stronger and wiserβa friend, a parent, a novelist, filmmaker, teacher, or musicianβcan josh us out of it, can elevate us and show us how petty and pompous and monumentally useless it is to take ourselves so seriously, then depression can become a habit, which, in tern, can produce a neurological imprint. Are you with me? Gradually, our brain chemistry becomes conditioned to react to negative stimuli in a particular, predictable way. One thing'll go wrong and it'll automatically switch on its blender and mix us that black cocktail, the olβ doomsday daiquiri, and before we know it, weβre soused to the gills from the inside out. Once depression has become electrochemically integrated, it can be extremely difficult to philosophically or psychologically override it; by then it's playing by physical rules, a whole different ball game. That's why, Switters my dearest, every time you've shown signs of feeling sorry for yourself, I've played my blues records really loud or read to you from The Horseβs Mouth. And thatβs why when youβve exhibited the slightest tendency toward self-importance, Iβve reminded you that you and meβ you and I: excuse meβmay be every bit as important as the President or the pope or the biggest prime-time icon in Hollywood, but none of us is much more than a pimple on the ass-end of creation, so letβs not get carried away with ourselves. Preventive medicine, boy. Itβs preventive medicine.β
βBut what about self-esteem?β
βHeh! Self-esteem is for sissies. Accept that youβre a pimple and try to keep a lively sense of humor about it. That way lies graceβand maybe even glory.
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Tom Robbins (Fierce Invalids Home from Hot Climates)