Eliot Spitzer Quotes

It sucks. I used to be governor of New York.

I moved back in with my parents in New York and got a job in politics. The George Pataki for Governor reelection campaign was in full swing. The Republican governor put a judge on the ticket to run as his attorney general candidate. Her name was Judge Irizarry, but people called her Judge “Irregardless.” Nobody on the Pataki campaign thought much of her since she’d get smoked by the incumbent Democrat attorney general running against her: Eliot Spitzer. His nickname was “the Steamroller.” He was a hard-charging, ambitious dude, and my job was to take him down with opposition research. I wasn’t very good at it because I missed the fact that he was sleeping with escorts up and down the East Coast. His new nickname became “Client Number 9” when a madame’s little black book was released.

Yes, people pull the trigger - but guns are the instrument of death. Gun control is necessary, and delay means more death and horror.

Yes, people pull the trigger - but guns are the instrument of death.

Well, I barely ever have to talk to him. He's usually too busy snorting cocaine off of Eliot Spitzer's prostitute, or whatever he does in his spare time.