Dakota Krout Quotes

Come, meat! Let this farce end! My people are hungry for manflesh!” “That’s what she said,” Joe whispered before shoveling more popcorn into his face.

Caffeinated! Temporary changes: Movement speed +10%! Charisma -2. Intelligence +1!

In classic gamer style, they were ready to throw themselves against overwhelming odds.

if I ever die, I want you to be the one to lower my body into the ground, just so that you can let me down one last time.>

Feel free to play with your balls here anytime you like.

he was still somewhat leery of agreeing to work now for a possible reward later. It was like an artist being asked to work for ‘exposure’. People die of exposure!

pickaxe-density erections

Some people choose to be tanks… some tanks are chosen. I think you are one of the chosen.

Mike looked at the building once more. He squinted and pointed up. “No shingles on the roof?” “Well, Mike,” Joe stood up, brushed off his Robe of Liquid Darkness, and shrugged, “no shingles on the blueprint.

Yes, dimensional warping. Someone had to have done this for the first time in the past. I don’t know who they were, but they must have had a pair on them bigger than my dungeon to be messing around with forces like these.

Guards can do what they want. Message. Received.

Yes, down with greenery and vegetables! Let’s cheese that broccoli!” Jaxon finished his inspiring speech, getting roaring approval

Masters of this skill have been known to remain in the air long enough to cross canyons, and Sages are rumored to be able to walk on clouds. You though… you can do a flip.

knowledge is only evil if it is used as such,

What falls faster, a ton of feathers or a one-ton anvil. The anvil, less wind resistance.

Overkill is the best kind of kill.

Not that he was resisting. This was getting fun.

Pay to win was a valid strategy, right? “Guess I’m running to the bank.

that people would have to bend over and reach like twenty times. Remember that handsome book writer who tagged along with a group for ‘inspiration’—what was his name? Dakota?

Firstly, stop screaming at me. If you want to speak against what I have to say, or you think I am wrong, give me reasons why I am wrong. Improve your argument. Next,

Still, his beans seemed to be full of admiration;

A place to live, money, and power that is there for the taking? That isn’t enough?” “No!” “...What about half taxes for six months?” There was a pause as people took in his words, and faces lit up. A few people nodded, some clapped.

Tomatoes. Why tomatoes?  Think of it like this: Strength was how hard you could throw a tomato. Dexterity was how fast you could get to a tomato and allowed you to slice the fruit without hurting yourself. Constitution let you eat rotten tomatoes without getting sick. Intelligence let you know that a tomato was a fruit, while wisdom let you know not to put it in a fruit salad. Charisma allowed you to sell a tomato-based fruit salad. Perception let you spot tomatoes

Mate then noticed the cat as well. It bubbled and steamed, and the cat hissed. Mate hissed like a kettle, then vanished into Joe’s sleeve once more. Joe stood and slowly backed away from the cat, “What are you, really? I don’t trust anything that my coffee doesn’t.

Intimidation (Journeyman I). You have learned that the most efficient method of dealing with people is saying exactly what you want. Honesty is key, and people have learned to respect that! This skill allows you to make new friends, gain better prices at shops, and speed up conversation. Sometimes people will even give you money for no particular reason! +2% chance to make a new friend, gain money, and get better prices per skill rank. Caution, sometimes people are afraid of the truth and will get mad about how friendly you are. They may even call guards to attack you!

I do, in fact, have a plan.” Aten told Joe, much to his surprise. “It requires a bit of legal mumbo-jumbo, so bear with me.” “Rawr!” Joe waved his hands in front of him like they were claws. Seeing that no one was smiling, Joe coughed into his hand and settled into a seat. “Sorry, was trying to ‘bear’ with you.

You don’t poke anyone with your sword. You don’t poke them with your finger, or a fork, or a spoon, or anything!” She hadn’t meant to raise her voice at the end, but she was starting to get very frustrated. “The game is called poker, but there isn’t any actual poking at all. Don’t worry about the name! It is a game about trying to get the best hand.” “This sounds gruesome. Now I have to cut people’s hands off?

With the refractive quality, no matter where people look, the light will be right in their face!” “Oh, Kirby.” Joe had chuckled at her falling expression. “This is an effective, well-made ritual… which makes rainbows. Just rainbows. If it helps, they would be rainbows that you could see at night, or use to light up an area. If there are things like sporting events or concerts, this is something they would love to have.

Are ya ready, Dwarves?” Havoc howled at his troops; their reply was almost incoherent screaming. “Aye, aye, Major General!” Havoc slammed his construct’s left ‘fist’ into the mountain, sending a spray of torn-out stone flying into the air. The other fist came down as that one retracted. “I can’t hear you!” “Aye, aye, Major General!” “Ohhh!” The fists started moving four times as fast as they pulverized the rocky surface. “Elves in a bunker, under this rock!” “War crimes, war crimes!” “What will we do, when we pull them on top?” Havoc bellowed as rock chips flew everywhere. “War crimes, war crimes!” “Is bloodshed and razing something you wish?” “War crimes, war crimes!” “Then come over here, and gut 'em like a fish!” “War crimes, war crimes!” “Ready?” Havoc popped out of the golem as it vanished into the tunnel it was rapidly digging, and he no longer needed to manually control it. “War crimes, war crimes…” “War crimes, war crimes!” “War cri~imes…! Here we go~o!

Rose whipped out an arrow and fired at him. Hans didn’t move, and the arrow *thunked* into the armor covering his knee. He looked down at the arrow, back at her, and back at the arrow. “Are you invoking the Northman’s courting ritual?” “Ha!” Tom bellowed a single, deep laugh. “He’s right; we call getting married ‘taking an arrow to the knee’! You just got engag-” he sputtered to a stop as he looked at an arrowhead that was pointing at his eye.

Gramma’s Shoe, Hidden Camp (Tier 0) Town Level: 0 Residents: 0 Morale: -125 (Dissatisfied.) Resources: none. Living areas: 0 (-25 morale). Air Quality: Livable (poor, increasing. -25 morale). Heat: Dangerous (Hot. -25 morale). Water Sources: 1 (Mineral Water. Tainted. -25 morale) Light: Poor (-25 morale). Now

Sir…” Major Cleave’s voice was pained. “Before you came here, what sort of things did people throw at you, and how many times a day did it happen? Just for research purposes.

Staying in your comfort zone means that you lack dedication to improve. A lack of dedication is an insult to those who believe in you.

Somehow,

He turned to the guards and made a motion. “Go, bring me the smith, and inform him that he is about to be on trial for beartrayal of the people.” A few tense minutes passed before the smith’s head appeared above the palisade. It bobbed up and down as he walked toward the gate, and he was glowering at the mayor the entire time. “What nonsense is this, that you would call me a betrayer?” “Technically, he called you a bear-trayer,

does death only come for those who are wicked? Does it spare good people just because they are good or excited? I think not!

Chef Gordon.

words turned the atmosphere gloomy. “This was a trap the entire time. Because we thought that there would be expert

Oh. I didn’t know you were a follower of the Divine I.T.” Zed shook his head as he recalled the strange cultists that tried to live by the words of powerful Ascenders. “The golden rule ‘turn it off and on again, to function better than it has been’? I guess; who am I to judge your beliefs?

There be no let. Me free Mob. Oni is a free Ogre! Oni does what wants!” the Ogre bellowed excitedly. “Oni was given a sock!

this

Sarge sounded like he was choking back laughter.

Necromancers get killed because they obtain more energy when strong emotions are passing through the person at the time of death. So, most quickly delve into torture and murder and other illegal things,

Most people tend to only look at or think about things that have value to them at that moment. They look so hard at what they want that they drown out the beautiful things that would give them hope or allow them to look beyond their small lives.

I’m Italian. I don't care.

Tom boomed at the now-nervous host, “Hello, tiny person. We need a table as presently as can be arranged. As a boon from the owner, Madam, we have been offered a place to eat as often as we are able to find the room in our stomach. I have found the room, have you yet found a table that can seat us?

Nothing in our world worth having is gained without pain and effort.

I can’t tell you. How would I be able to remain aloof and mysterious?

when you are suddenly far stronger, taller, more powerful, and have a greater capacity for intelligence than you used to, you may look back on your old self as a pathetic version. A bit harsh though.

They have the right to act like the entitled snobs that they are. So their people will eventually revolt and potentially overthrow them.

tells us that war serves little purpose. That is, outside of causing destruction and suffering. The main outcome of this type of war is drastic change to society at large. This mentality arises from the idea that 'there is no other option', that the only thing that can possibly be beneficial is killing and destroying the previous order. From the ashes rises a new, 'better' society.

for now until forever, wherever you are is where I want to be. If that means we charge forward into the unknown and fail, then by the abyss, we will be doing it together! Forward it is.>

I once thought that I understood human nature, that I was a good judge of character. I have been proven wrong far too often. Now, I do what I feel needs to be done.

Ah, well. Nothing to do now but learn from his mistakes and move forward with his eyes open the possibilities in front of him.

That’s how you knew that a pun was mature, after all—when it was full groan.

If you have three, you have three. Two, and you have two. If you have only one, you have none. What is it?” Dale ignored him, lunging for the wall, desperately trying to blast a hole through it. He failed, yet again. “It’s options,

Hold still so I can kill you! Grahh! You. That’s you.

Bob ran off to inform himselves of the recent developments.

Today was a nice day,” he spoke aloud, causing the birds in the area to go quiet. “I’m bringing dinner, didn’t die, and I’m done early. Hmm. Yup. Good day.

I’m a gem. I’m shiny.>

Starting with the lowest, we have G, F, E, D, C, B, A, S, SS, SSS, Heavenly, and Godly.

So far they had found three left boots. Maybe I am evil.

be in lots of pain soon. “That sounds fun…?” Grant cautiously ventured. “I've heard tales of people that traveled a mile with each step; is it something like that?”

I’ve checked upstairs,” one of the other bounty hunters shouted down after a few minutes. “No sign of Grant Monday. Just a gaggle of kids, and one that was peeing on the walls! Hah!” “Timmy!” Fergus shouted as he scrambled to get up from the table. “I showed you, boy. Do. It. In. The. Toilet!

It's over nine thousand?

Caravan is in need of a guard. Danger level: minimal. This opening is due to the death of a guard, but fear not! He died from choking on a strawberry pie.

It isn’t so much that I am happy they died, I am happy that I lived.

Explaining that there was indeed a new dungeon, no the mountains had not finally driven the sheepherders insane, the local Guild leader was about to dismiss this as a beginner training area of no importance when he was told of the Elven nation’s mobilization.

I’ll try to remember that real power is not in what something looks like but in the quality of the effort that it takes to get there. >

May knowledge find you, wherever you may hide.

Balls! Attack!

CAL Scan complete! Level: 0 Current Etheric Xenograft Potentia: 15/100 to level 1! Body: 1.1 Mind: 3.75 Presence: 1.9 Senses: 2.25 Health: 59 Mana: 92 Mana regen: 1.83 per second

Destroyed, Damaged, Flawed, Low-quality, Common, Strong, High-Quality, Extreme High-Quality, Forged, and Perfect. Those are all the possible Mana Channel qualities.

The sand is attacking me! Die, sand!

Suki laid out a deck of cards that had been included in the supplies they’d bought, running Grant through the different types of games he could expect to see. It didn’t take long for him to realize how much trouble he was in. “How do you keep all these rules straight in your head?” He pointed at the game they were practicing at the moment. “I am supposed to slap the Jacks and Jokers, but not the others? Then this one: the one where I have to count to twenty one… I don’t slap, I hit? What am I supposed to hit again? The dealer?” “No. No, don’t hit the dealer.” Suki massaged her left temple as her eyelid twitched. “You say the word ‘hit’ when you want another card.” “But in this game, I’m supposed to hit.” Grant pointed at the pile of cards in front of him. “Do I get to hit the dealer in this game, then?” “No! No hitting actual people!” Suki picked up the cards and shuffled them. “Let’s stop worrying about the games where you might get us kicked out, and focus on just one. The most important game to learn is poker. It’s known as the gentleman's game, and it focuses more on reading other people than the cards themselves.” “Poker. So, I… poke them with my sword?

Tom!” Rose screamed, racing forward. The defenders moved together and began a painful tug-of-war using Tom’s body as the rope. Tom screamed as the defenders won with a roar and a jerk, pulling off the arm of the creature that had been gripping him. “Anyone need a hand?” Tom panted, then chuckled. “I… ha-ha… I got a spare arm now!” There were chuckles all around as people went back to defending. Someone called out, “I wouldn’t use that one; you have no idea where it might have been!” “Looks like we don’t need to give you a hand.” “Seems you have a good handle on things!” “Yikes, this fight is getting out of hand!” Rose shuddered. “You all need to stop.

Sir, the geological surveys all came back clean! There is nothing we could have done to predict this,” the man standing in front of the toolpusher–the person in charge of every crew on the oil rig–nervously reported.

Want a cup of me?” “What?” “Want a cup of Joe?” Joe chuckled at the pun as he downed his fifth cup of the day. It was already nine in the morning, after all.

I’ll tell you now, creamy lies certainly spread easier upon the toast of life than the cold and chunky truth does.

Joe woke up feeling refreshed and cheerful. Sure, he didn’t have a team to hunt with. Yes, the quests that he currently had were long-term and vastly difficult. No, he didn’t have a clear way to reach his goals... Joe suddenly wasn’t feeling quite as cheerful.

Towny McTownface!

Joe the stupid Human that can’t do his own shopping’,

That will only hold it for a few seconds! Quick! Count its vertebrae!

I can and I will live off coffee!

Can-do, bald daddy-o.” Jaxon threw out a mock salute, and Joe tried not to vomit in his mouth.

At least, someday my Constitution will be high enough that I can live on coffee alone.

How very interesting! You’re considering problems so far in the future, and I have no interest in them. I'm not going to say that I only come visit you when I’m coated in hot, sticky blood, filthy as a pig, and feel like having clean underwear again… but I'm feeling rather fresh and ready to get back out there. Have a lovely day!

Change of plans.” Joe started moving faster. “I need to put that beast out of its misery before Jaxon finishes experimenting on it. War crimes are one thing; letting him have free rein is another.

It's about to be an all-you-can-kill buffet, and our diet ended yesterday!

Dinos vs Elves’, which was splayed across the cover of what was clearly a children's book depicting an Elf being bitten in half by a pterodactyl.

poked his organs back into place

Who doesn’t want something for zero effort?” The group tried to think of a good answer for that but instead shrugged

Dani tried to shake me out of my melancholy, “Hey! Listen!” For some reason, the way she said those words made me slightly upset. I tried to move past it.

That’s before the effect we are after is in place.

Trust no one and nothing. An attack can come from anywhere, at any time.

Once something is shown to be possible, the body and mind will accept it much more easily.

That was Cardinal Kere Nolsen, the High Inquisitor of the Holy Church, the man known as ‘The Slayer of Shades’. The single most terrifying embodiment of pure justice known to mankind. When he accesses his power, he needs to mete out punishments for your sins. He makes them visible to all around him so that everyone can see that justice is being done. There are no people that are immune to his influence.

Under your restrictive mindset, even breathing is a sin because you take air that another could use! Open your eyes, child!