β
Love is not the absence of logic
but logic examined and recalculated
heated and curved to fit
inside the contours of the heart
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Choosing to be with you, isn't a difficult decision, Jacqueline...It's easy. Incredibly easy.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
You're full of contradictions, Ms. Wallace."
I looked up at him and arched a brow. "I'm a girl. That's part of the job description, Mr. Maxfield.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Words are never 'only words'; they matter because they define the contours of what we can do.
β
β
Slavoj Ε½iΕΎek
β
He knew me in all the ways that truly mattered: the shape of my fears, the contours of my dreams.
β
β
Justina Chen
β
The truth was, he now belonged only to my past, and it was time I begin to accept it, as much as it hurt to do so.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I wanted to tell you that I just--I miss you. And maybe that sounds ridiculous--like we barely know each other, but between the emails and texts and... everything else, I felt like we did. Like we do. and I miss--I don't know how else to say it--I miss both of you.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
The mold in which a key is made would be a strange thing, if you had never seen a key: and the key itself a strange thing if you had never seen a lock. Your soul has a curious shape because it is a hollow made to fit a particular swelling in the infinite contours of the divine substance, or a key to unlock one of the doors in the house with many mansions.
Your place in heaven will seem to be made for you and you alone, because you were made for it -- made for it stitch by stitch as a glove is made for a hand.
β
β
C.S. Lewis (The Problem of Pain)
β
As for being somewhere you're not supposed to be--Maybe you're here for a reason, or there is no reason.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
The night we metβI'm not like that guy." His jaw was rigid.
"I know thaβ" He placed a finger over my lips, his expression softening.
"So I don't want you to feel pressured. Or overpowered. But I do, absolutely, want to kiss you right now. Badly.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
People rarely said what they thought, or revealed how they felt. No one was honest.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
If someone had asked, "How does this compare to kissing Kennedy?" I would have answered, "Who?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
sometimes, how a situation is perceived carries more weight than the reality of the matter.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
The type of human being we prefer reveals the contours of our heart.
β
β
JosΓ© Ortega y Gasset
β
It is by riding a bicycle that you learn the contours of a country best, since you have to sweat up the hills and coast down them.
β
β
Ernest Hemingway (By-Line: Selected Articles and Dispatches of Four Decades)
β
He stuck the pencil over his ear, looking unconvinced. "Mmm. What position would you be the most comfortable for you?"
I couldn't say aloud the answers that popped into my head at that question, but the flush that spread across my face like wildfire gave me away. He caught his lower lip in his teeth, and I was sure it was to contain a laugh. Most comfortable position? What about with my head stuck under a pillow?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Bonus: I now knew what Erin meant by lickable abs.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Sisters in solidarity and all that shit.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Lucas: I wanted to talk to you after class, but you disappeared.
Me: I have another class right after. One of those profs who stops talking, stares at you and waits until you get to your seat if you're late.
Lucas: I would probably just walk to my seat even slower. ;)
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Ugh! Erin. You have a one-track mind."
She smiled deviously. "I prefer to think of it as target-driven.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
He brushed my tears from my face. "How did I find you?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
His hands reached for me, gripping my hipbones and pulling me forward. he stared down at me, his voice low. "There are some things I will make time for, Jacqueline.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Please touch me. I need you to touch me.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
What I can't do anywhere is be with you.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Choosing to be with you isn't a difficult decision, Jacqueline," he breathed, pulling back one final time to stare into my eyes. "It's easy. Incredibly easy.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Unfortunately, the coughing drew her attention. "Are you dying or something?" she asked, affecting a perfect sneer as I shook my head. "Well, hacking up a lung out in public isn't all that attractive--just sayin'."
My face flamed, but then Benji leaned up and spoke around me. "Um, giving half the class an exhaustive summary every Monday morning--in lurid detail--of how much of an alcoholic skank you are? Isn't all that attractive either. Just sayin'.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
The way he kissed me felt like a brand. Like he was tattooing himself under my skin.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
So when do we get to the junk-kicking?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
It was strange learning the contours of anotherβs loneliness. You could never know it all at once; like stepping inside a dark cave, you felt along the walls, bumped into jagged edges.
β
β
Brit Bennett (The Mothers)
β
He took one of my hands in his, and I brought the other to his face, wondering how his eyes could look like chipped ice and still warm me to my core.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Too much quiet left me depressed and consuming condiments for meals.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Close your eyes and picture it. Can you see it?"
I nod, eyes closed.
"Imagine it right there before you. See its texture, shape, and colorβgot it?"
I smile, holding the image in my head.
"Good. Now reach out and touch it. Feel its contours with the tips of your fingers, cradle its weight in the palms of your hands, then combine all of your sensesβsight, touch, smell, tasteβcan you taste it?"
I bite my lip and suppress a giggle.
"Perfect. Now combine that with feeling. Believe it exists right before you. Feel it, see it, touch it, taste it, accept it, manifest it!" he says.
So I do. I do all of those things. And when he groans, I open my eyes to see for myself.
"Ever." He shakes his head. "You were supposed to think of an orange. This isn't even close."
"Nope, nothing fruity about him." I laugh, smiling ateach of my Damensβthe replica I manifested before me, and the flesh and blood version beside me. Both of them equally tall, dark, and so devastatingly handsome they hardly seem real.
β
β
Alyson Noel (Blue Moon (The Immortals, #2))
β
Erin was right. Apologies could come too late.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
A world grows up around me. Am I shaping it, or do its predetermined contours guide my hand?
β
β
Alan Moore (Watchmen)
β
I lost myself so entirely in charting the contours of my love for you that there wasn't any room for tracking time. There wasn't any room to examine the past or the future, there was only the eternal now.
β
β
S.T. Gibson (A Dowry of Blood (A Dowry of Blood, #1))
β
His earlier hesitation gone, he removed the last scraps of fabric we were wearing, fixed the condom in place, kissed me fiercely and rocked into me.
Had this been Kennedy, it would have been over in a few minutes.
My last coherent thought, as Lucas took his time kissing and touching every part of me he could reach and my body arched into his, was Oh... so this is what all the fuss is about.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
The freedom I want is located in a world where we wouldn't need to love women, or even monitor our feelings about women as meaningfulβin which we wouldn't need to parse the contours of female worth and liberation by paying meticulous personal attention to any of this at all.
β
β
Jia Tolentino (Trick Mirror: Reflections on Self-Delusion)
β
While Daniel disappeared into his room, probably to limn the contours of some exquisite constellation of philosophical nonsense for his internship applications and gasp in the throes of his overachieving OCDness.
β
β
Michelle Hodkin (The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer (Mara Dyer, #1))
β
Maybe I'm exactly where I should be after all.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I'm trying to protect you. From myself. I don't do..." he swung a finger back and forth between us"...this.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
He was lovable the way a child is lovable, and he was capable of returning love with a childlike purity. If love is nevertheless excluded from his work, it's because he never quite felt that he deserved to receive it. He was a lifelong prisoner on the island of himself. What looked like gentle contours from a distance were in fact sheer cliffs. Sometimes only a little of him was crazy, sometimes nearly all of him, but, as an adult, he was never entirely not crazy. What he'd seen of his id while trying to escape his island prison by way of drugs and alcohol, only to find himself even more imprisoned by addiction, seems never to have ceased to be corrosive of his belief in his lovability. Even after he got clean, even decades after his late-adolescent suicide attempt, even after his slow and heroic construction of a life for himself, he felt undeserving. And this feeling was intertwined, ultimately to the point of indistinguishability, with the thought of suicide, which was the one sure way out of his imprisonment; surer than addiction, surer than fiction, and surer, finally, than love.
β
β
Jonathan Franzen
β
A word of advice, though. This won't be the last time you have to deal with something in life that throws you off your game. In future courses, as well as in the real world--such as it is--professors and employers won't always be accommodating. We all have to--what's my daughter's terminology--suck it up and deal?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
We talked--recent history only--and Lucas relayed the story of how Francis came to be his roommate. "He showed up at the door one night, demanding to be let in. Napped on the sofa for an hour, then demanded to be let out. It turned into a nightly ritual, with him staying longer and longer, until at some point I realized he'd moved in. He's basically the most brazen squatter ever.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Not stupid. Overly trusting, maybe, but that reflects on his lack of trustworthiness, not on your intelligence.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Look - guys are dogs. Women have known this since the beginning of time. Guys don't want to be chased; they chase. So if you're going to catch one, you have to know how to make him chase you.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I could never be afraid of you.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Regular maps have few surprises: their contour lines reveal where the Andes are, and are reasonably clear. More precious, though, are the unpublished maps we make ourselves, of our city, our place, our daily world, our life; those maps of our private world we use every day; here I was happy, in that place I left my coat behind after a party, that is where I met my love; I cried there once, I was heartsore; but felt better round the corner once I saw the hills of Fife across the Forth, things of that sort, our personal memories, that make the private tapestry of our lives.
β
β
Alexander McCall Smith (Love Over Scotland (44 Scotland Street, #3))
β
Chivalry isn't really dead you know."
"Oh?"
"Nah. That guy's just an asshole.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Everyone isnβt logical. Everything doesnβt make sense in the end. Sometimes you have to forget about explanations or excuses and leave people and places behind, because otherwise they will drag you straight down.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Breakable (Contours of the Heart, #2))
β
The difference between a path and a road is not only the obvious one. A path is little more than a habit that comes with knowledge of a place. It is a sort of ritual of familiarity. As a form, it is a form of contact with a known landscape. It is not destructive. It is the perfect adaptation, through experience and familiarity, of movement to place; it obeys the natural contours; such obstacles as it meets it goes around.
β
β
Wendell Berry (The Art of the Commonplace: The Agrarian Essays)
β
His jaw clenched. "Okay, so I guess trying to let you down easy was a bad idea--"
"This is your idea of letting me down easy? Breaking up with me so you can screw other girls? Without feeling guilty? Are you serious?"
"As a heart attack."
The last thing I thought before I picked up my econ textbook and hurled it at him: How can he use such a piece-of-shit cliche in a moment like this?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Moonlight knew no colors and traced the contours of the terrain only very softly. It covered the land a dirty gray, strangling life all night long. This world molded in lead, where nothing moved but the wind that fell sometimes like a shadow over the gray forests, and where nothing lived but the scent of the naked earth, was the only world he accepted, for it was much like the world of his soul.
β
β
Patrick SΓΌskind (Perfume: The Story of a Murderer)
β
No matter what happened to any individual person, life was going on elsewhere. The first time Kennedy kissed me, it stood to reason that at the same time, other people were splitting up. And the night Kennedy broke my heart, somewhere--maybe right there in my dorm, other people were falling in love.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
It was as though he didn't exist, and then suddenly, he was everywhere.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
He's already chasing you. Now all you have to do is keep running. Just not too fast.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Really, he could have just punched me in the stomach, because my brain refused to comprehend the words he was saying. A physical assault, it might have understood.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Damn Kennedy. Damn him, damn him. It would serve him right to see me with someone like Lucas. Someone so different, but equally hot. More so, if I started calculating details.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I'm going to arrange you, if that's okay?"
I swallowed. "Uh... sure." My hands were clutched to my ribcage, my shoulders hunched almost to my ears. What, this isn't how you want me positioned?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Your father is Dr. Lucas--one of the foremost minds in modern economics--and you're studying art? What the hell are you going to do with a degree in art?"
She drew herself up to all five foot two, eyes flashing, and said, "I'm going to make the world more beautiful. What are you going to do? Make money?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I'm gonna make that asshole gnaw his own hand off that night, dammit.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
We live in a world with a lot of insecure, jealous people. Some of them are our best friends. They are blood relatives. Failure terrifies them. So does our success. Because when we transcend what we once thought possible, push our limits, and become more, our light reflects off all the walls theyβve built up around them. Your light enables them to see the contours of their own prison, their own self-limitations. But if they are truly the great people you always believed them to be, their jealousy will evolve, and soon their imagination might hop its fence, and it will be their turn to change for the better.
β
β
David Goggins (Can't Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds)
β
I'd basically described myself: a quiet, studious bookworm who would go to bed at a decent hour. A non-partier who wouldn't bring a parade of boys through our room, or make it the floor headquarters for beer pong.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I noticed you the first week. Not just because of how pretty you are, though of course, that played into it. It was the way you lean onto your elbows when you 're listening in class, when something catches your interest. And when you laugh, it's never to get attention, it's just-laughter. The way you obssevively tuck your hair behind your ear on the left side, but let the right side fall down like a screen. And when you 're bored, you tap your foot soundlessly and move your fingers on the desktop like you 're playing an instrument. I wanted to sketch you.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I watched him pull his t-shirt over his head.
I could put hin on replay doing that and watch it all day...
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Let's go make Chaz wish he was never born."
"Oh, Erin. I'm so glad you 're on my side."
"Damn right, bitch.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
People feel the need to choose sides when a relationship splitsβit's human nature.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
His breath in my ear, he ran his tongue along the curved edge, sucking the fleshy lobe and my small diamond stud into his mouth, and my eyes drifted closed while I babbled a weak sound of longing.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Ooh, J, he's got ink too."
"Just when i didn't think he could get any hotter...
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I never wanted you to get hurt, but i wanted to take you from him.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
What will you do with them?"
"Redo them in charcoal, probably."
"And then?"
"Tack them to my bedroom wall."
Bedroom wall?
"Who wouldn't want to wake up to this?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Erin and I spent four hours shopping for dresses and shoes Tuesday night. She was going all out in her intention to make Chaz regret any decision he'd made that didn't include worshipping at her feet.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Alcohol removes inhibitions. It doesn't trigger criminal violence where there was none before.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Time would not change what I was feeling--or not feeling. I'd had time, and though the ache from his desertion hadn't disappeared, it was decreasing. My future was blurry, yes, but I was beginning to imagine a future when I would no longer miss him at all.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I've been known to slum it and shop in the gag-him-and-bag-him aisles, believe it or not.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I took a breath and blurted everything out before I was too chickenshit to say any of it. βI wanted to tell you that I justβI miss you. And maybe
that sounds ridiculousβlike we barely know each other, but between the emails and texts andβ¦ everything else, I felt like we did. Like we do. And I
missβI donβt know how else to say itβI miss both of you.β
He swallowed, closing his eyes and inhaling slowly. I knew he would be all rational and do-the-right-thing and he would push me away again,
and I was determined not to give him that chance. But then his eyes flashed open and he said, βFuck it,β pushing me against the door, slamming his
forearms on either side of my head and kissing me more forcefully than Iβd ever been kissed
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
But why?"
"You heard the pay, right? And also, to be near you." Thumbing a tear from my cheek, he added, "Mostly, to be near you.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Say stop, whenever you want to stop. Understand?"
I nodded.
"Do you want to stop now?"
My head moved back and forth to the pillow.
"Thank God.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Woman, if i was straight, i would steal you from him so hard.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I breathed him in, closing my mouth tight and inhaling the scent of him through my nose. I felt sheltered by him. Safe.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
In their choice of lovers both the male and the female reveal their essential nature. The type of human being we prefer reveals the contours of our heart. Love is an impulse which springs from the most profound depths of our beings, and upon reaching the visible surface of life carries with it an alluvium of shells and seaweed from the inner abyss. A skilled naturalist, by filing these materials, can reconstruct the oceanic depths from which they have been uprooted.
β
β
JosΓ© Ortega y Gasset
β
There is an internal landscape, a geography of the soul; we search for its outlines all our lives. Those who are lucky enough to find it ease like water over a stone, onto its fluid contours, and are home. Some find it in the place of their birth; others may leave a seaside town, parched, and find themselves refreshed in the desert. There are those born in rolling countryside who are really only at ease in the intense and busy loneliness of the city. For some, the search is for the imprint of another; a child or a mother, a grandfather or a brother, a lover, a husband, a wife, or a foe. We may go through our lives happy or unhappy, successful or unfulfilled, loved or unloved, without ever standing cold with the shock of recognition, without ever feeling the agony as the twisted iron in our soul unlocks itself and we slip at last into place.
β
β
Josephine Hart
β
Stay here tonight, Jacqueline. I need to keep you here, at least tonight. Please.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I want to see your tattoos."
"You do, huh?
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Ah, crap. I forgot what my hands look like after drawing. You may have little gray marks...everywhere.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Some of us can begin to heal the damage people have done to us by escaping the situation, but some of us need more than that. Tattoos make statements that need to be made. Or hide things that are no one's business. Your scars are battle wounds, but you don't see them that way. Yet.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Breakable (Contours of the Heart, #2))
β
The last time someone dried my hair for me was in sixth grade, when i broke my arm."
"How did you break it?"
"I fell out of a tree."
"You fell out of a tree?"
"I think there was a boy and a dare involved."
"Ah.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Almost every time i saw you, you were with him. But one day, you walked up to the building alone. I was holding the door for several girls in front of you, and i waited for you to catch up. When you reached me, you look pleased, and a little surprised. Unlike the others, you didn't expect the door to be held for you by some random guy. You smiled up at me and said, 'Thank you.' That was the last straw. I prayed you 'd never come to a session, and not with him. I didn't want you to know i was the tutor.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
LUCAS: I've done a couple from memory but they aren't the same. Can't quite get the shape of your jaw. The line of your neck. And your lips. I need to spend more time staring at them and less time tasting them.
ME: I can't say i agree with that notion.
LUCAS: More of both, then.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I'd always disparaged the games people played in pursuit of love--or the next hook up. The whole thing was a competition to see who could get how far, and I could never figure out if there was more luck or skill involved, or some unknowable combination of the two. People rarely said what they thought, or revealed how they felt. No one was honest.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
Minus my relationship with Kennedy, I had no automatic invitation to Greek Parties or events, though Chaz and Erin could invite me to some stuff since I fell under the heading of acceptable things to bring to any party: alcohol and girls.
Awesome. I'd gone from independent girlfriend to party paraphernalia.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
It's not that i don't want you. I lied, earlier, when i said i was protecting you. I'm protecting myself. I don't want to be your rebound, Jacqueline."
"Then why are you assuming that role? It's not what i want, either."
"What am i gonna do with you?"
"I can think of a couple things.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
I take it this is one of the ones crushing on you."
"What? They all crush on me. I'm a hot college girl, remember?" I laughed and his eyes burned into mine.
He leaned in close and whispered into my ear. "So hot. Now you've got me thinking what you looked like this morning, when i woke up with you in my arms, in my bed. Would it be too greedy to ask you to stay tonight, too?"
"I was afraid you weren't going to ask.
β
β
Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
β
What would happen if a man's face could adequately express his suffering, if his entire inner agony would be objectified in his facial expression? Could we still communicate? Wouldn't we then cover our faces with our hands while talking? Life would really be impossible if the infinitude of feelings we harbor within ourselves would be fully expressed in the lines of our face. Nobody would dare look at himself in the mirror, because a grotesque, tragic image would mix in the contours of his face with stains and traces of blood, wounds which cannot be healed, and unstoppable streams of tears. I would experience a kind of voluptuous awe if I could see a volcano of blood, eruptions as red as fire and as burning as despair, burst into the comfortable and superficial harmony of everyday life, or if I could see all our hidden wounds open, making of us a bloody eruption forever. Only then would be truly understand and appreciate the advantages of loneliness, which silences our suffering and makes it inaccessible. The venom drawn out from suffering would be enough to poison the whole world in a bloody eruption, bursting out of the volcano of our being. There is so much venom, so much poison, in suffering!
β
β
Emil M. Cioran (On the Heights of Despair)
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(Decadent style) is ingenious, complicated, learned, full of shades of meaning and research, always pushing further the limits of language... forcing itself to express in thought that which is most ineffable, and in form the vaguest and most fleeting contours; listening that it may translate them to the subtle confidences of the neuropath, to the avowals of aging and depraved passion, and to the singular hallucinations of the fixed idea verging on madness... In opposition to the classic style, it admits of shading, and these shadows teem and swarm with the larvae of superstitions, the haggard phantoms of insomnia, nocturnal terrors, remorse which starts and turns back at the slightest noise, monstrous dreams stayed only by impotence, obscure phantasies at which daylight would stand amazed, and all that the soul conceals of the dark, the unformed, and the vaguely horrible, in its deepest and furthest recesses.
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ThΓ©ophile Gautier (Charles Baudelaire and His Life)
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Nobody would dare look at himself in the mirror, because a grotesque, tragic image would mix in the contours of his face with stains and traces of blood, wounds which cannot be healed, and unstoppable streams of tears. I would experience a kind of voluptuous awe if I could see a volcano of blood, eruptions as red as fire and as burning as despair, burst into the midst of the comfortable and superficial harmony of everyday life, or if I could see all our hidden wounds open, making of us a bloody eruption forever. Only then would we truly understand and appreciate the advantage of loneliness, which silences our suffering and makes it inaccessible. The venom drawn out from suffering would be enough to poison the whole world in a bloody eruption, bursting out of the volcano of our being. There is so much venom, so much poison, in suffering!
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Emil M. Cioran (On the Heights of Despair)
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my final piece
Weβre born into the world
As just one small piece to the puzzle
That makes up an entire life.
Itβs up to us throughout our years,
to find all of our pieces that fit.
The pieces that connect who we are
To who we were
To who weβll one day be.
Sometimes pieces will almost fit.
Theyβll feel right.
Weβll carry them around for a while,
Hoping theyβll change shape.
Hoping theyβll conform to our puzzle.
But they wonβt.
Weβll eventually have to let them go.
To find the puzzle that is their home.
Sometimes pieces wonβt fit at all.
No matter how much we want them to.
Weβll shove them.
Weβll bend them.
Weβll break them.
But what isnβt meant to be,
wonβt be.
Those are the hardest pieces of all to
accept.
The pieces of our puzzle
That just donβt belong.
But occasionally . . .
Not very often at all,
If weβre lucky,
If we pay enough attention,
Weβll find a
perfect match.
The pieces of the puzzle that slide right in
The pieces that hug the contours of our own
pieces.
The pieces that lock to us.
The pieces that we lock to.
The pieces that fit so well, we canβt tell
where our piece begins
And that piece ends.
Those pieces we call
Friends.
True loves.
Dreams.
Passions.
Beliefs.
Talents.
Theyβre all the pieces that complete our
puzzles.
They line the edges,
Frame the corners,
Fill the centers,
Those pieces are the pieces that make us
who we are.
Who we were.
Who weβll one day be.
Up until today,
When I looked at my own puzzle,
I would see a finished piece.
I had the edges lined,
The corners framed,
The center filled.
It felt like it was complete.
All the pieces were there.
I had everything I wanted.
Everything I needed.
Everything I dreamt of.
But up until today,
I realized I had collected all
but one piece.
The most vital piece.
The piece that completes the picture.
The piece that completes my whole life.
I held this girl in my arms
She wrapped her tiny fingers around mine.
It was then that I realized
She was the fusion.
The glue.
The cement that bound all my pieces
together.
The piece that seals my puzzle.
The piece that completes my life.
The element that makes me who I am.
Who I was.
Who Iβll one day be.
You, baby girl.
Youβre my final piece.
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Colleen Hoover (This Girl (Slammed, #3))
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I'm so proud of you. I want you to tell me about it, when you can... and when i can stand to hear it. I'm still too angry right now.."
"Okay."
"I knew i'd fucked up. I was getting on my bike, coming after you-and then you were running up the driveway. When he tackled you...i wanted to kill him. I think if Charles hadn't stopped me, i would have killed him.
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Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
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This girl wasnβt tapping her fingers restlessly, though. Her movements were methodical. Synchronized. Sitting far enough to the left of her to study her profile, I watched her chin bob, so subtly it was almost undetectable β and at some point, I realized that when her expression was remote and her fingers were moving, she was hearing music. She was playing music.
It was the most magical thing Iβd ever seen anyone do.
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Tammara Webber (Breakable (Contours of the Heart, #2))
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Please touch me. I need you to touch me."
I didn't have to ask twice. His arms came around me, pulling me onto his lap and cradling me against his chest.
"His blood? From his nose?"
I nodded, disgusted.
"Good girl." His arms slid around me again. "God, you 're so fucking amazing."
"I want it off. I want it off."
"Yes. Soon." His fingers moved gently over my face. "I'm so sorry, Jacqueline. Jesus Christ, i can't believe i sent you out the door like that. Please forgive me."
As he caressed me, i turned my head under his chin, folding into him as small as i could get. "I'm sorry for looking her up. I didn't know-"
"Shh, baby...not now. Just let me hold you." He pulled me tighter still after grabbing his jacket from the grass nearby and draping it over me, and we stopped speaking.
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Tammara Webber (Easy (Contours of the Heart, #1))
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Admirable, however, as the Paris of the present day appears to you, build up and put together again in imagination the Paris of the fifteenth century; look at the light through that surprising host of steeples, towers, and belfries; pour forth amid the immense city, break against the points of its islands, compress within the arches of the bridges, the current of the Seine, with its large patches of green and yellow, more changeable than a serpent's skin; define clearly the Gothic profile of this old Paris upon an horizon of azure, make its contour float in a wintry fog which clings to its innumerable chimneys; drown it in deep night, and observe the extraordinary play of darkness and light in this sombre labyrinth of buildings; throw into it a ray of moonlight, which shall show its faint outline and cause the huge heads of the towers to stand forth from amid the mist; or revert to that dark picture, touch up with shade the thousand acute angles of the spires and gables, and make them stand out, more jagged than a shark's jaw, upon the copper-coloured sky of evening. Now compare the two.
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Victor Hugo (The Hunchback of Notre-Dame)