“
There’s a certain high you get from fooling the world into thinking you’re the lamb instead of the rabid wolf.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
A serial killer sharing a house with a homicide detective and a FBI agent. Life doesn’t get more complicated than this.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
It’s sad that I want to hide my bodies now so that my boyfriend gets a break and can spend more time with me.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Two bodies in two days is a rapid devolution. He’s getting too bold.” I dropped two bodies in one day, but I hardly feel like now is the time to brag about my awesome efficiency.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Why is there a gun hidden in my bathroom? Have you ever seen a horror film?
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
just smile, looking all sweet and shit. No ruthless killer here, boys. Just a harmless woman falling in love. That’s all.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I really don’t like her. Can I cut her? Just a little?
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
When anger rises, think of the consequences. —Confucius
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
It’s all cloak and dagger right now. That’s what happens when you’re a serial killer dating a FBI profiler who hunts serial killers.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Do I need to kill her? No. No. I can’t kill her. Not unless she’s a rapist. Any chance she’s a rapist?
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
But they’re looking for a monster. Not a girl who loves red. Not a girl who is falling in love. Not a girl who died ten years ago.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
To see and listen to the wicked is already the beginning of wickedness. —Confucius
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
A serial killer sharing a house with a homicide detective and a FBI agent.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Real knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance. —Confucius
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
We had him all wrong. There won’t be animal cruelty in his past. He’ll have been someone gentle, possibly naïve and trusting—too trusting. Trusting enough to have been someone’s victim.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Kill all the monsters,” she whispers. “That way they don’t hurt anyone else.” Lindy’s breath catches, and I frown. I hope her influence outshines mine in the long run. “I’ll kill them all so you never have to,” I whisper back,
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
But I obviously don’t point that out. A good, sane, non-stabby girl wouldn’t know that.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Logan is taunting. Duke is arrogant. And I’m worried there’s about to be a sword fight in my living room. And not with actual swords.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Definitely should have stabbed that motherfucker more. And weighed him down with stones. And chummed the water for sharks or something. Are there sharks here?
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Without feelings of respect, what is there to distinguish men from beasts?
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
She has no idea at how sick the world is.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Why is there a gun hidden in my bathroom? Have you ever seen a horror film? The girl always gets stabbed in the shower. Or she runs into the bathroom and locks the door, but has no way to defend herself when the psycho killer breaks in.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
The FBI will be all over me. And my boyfriend has the cops watching my house. The house where I have all my murder supplies that I have to use. Cops that follow me to the store when I get milk. Obviously they can’t follow me and guard my kill zone for days on end while I torture people. Stupid Boogeyman. I wish I could castrate him.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
He’s bringing back parts of me that I thought were dead, resurrecting my soul from ashes. But all the shadows that lurk inside me, hiding the monster within… Those are parts he can never see.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
It’s often easier for someone to believe evil can’t exist inside someone they love, than to admit they’ve failed someone who should be more important. We see it too often. The blind eye effect is what we call it,
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Now I just wait on the chips to fall in place, and while they play poker, I’ll be playing dominoes.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Keep me awake while I drive,” I tell her, not commenting on any of the other. “You want me to tell you about how I broke my vibrator this morning?
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Because a sadist would never take the time to deviate from his list and go kill a pedophile. This was motivated.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Then I’d have been just as ugly on the outside as I am on the inside.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change. —Confucius
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Have I told you today that you're perfect?
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
The relief that washes over his face makes it worth all the million and one things that can go wrong. He genuinely cares about me. He’s terrified for me right now because a merciless killer might be after me. The irony isn’t lost on me.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Keep me awake while I drive,” I tell her, not commenting on any of the other.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Someone killed this guy, but I’m looking for the dozens of kids who are missing more than I’m looking for his killer.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
You know it’s worth it. You stop killers. You’re a hero.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Kill all the monsters,” she whispers. “That way they don’t hurt anyone else.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Falling in love? It’s the end of a girl like me.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I don’t bleed for the world anymore.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
A man who’s never had something may be content in going on without it.” “But a man who’s had a taste of something he didn’t know he wanted, will work harder to taste more,
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
The superior man is modest in his speech, but exceeds in his actions. —Confucius
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Turns out, I’m just someone he didn’t bother to think of when I was going out of my mind with all the worst case scenarios.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Death and life have their determined appointments. —Confucius
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
It’s the first time I’ve faced my past with a face I didn’t want to cut off.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I don’t feel comfortable with a random stranger sleeping in my house. A badge doesn’t make him noble.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
There’s no way a girl carried him to the water alone.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
They always confess their sins to me.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I’ve had self-defense training. I have two guns. I also plan to run out the back door instead of up the stairs. We’re good. I can handle this.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Feeling stabby?” he muses, still trying to lighten my mood. “Very.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Don’t these women know that it’s dangerous to piss off a highly trained killer?
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I am Kennedy Carlyle. Well, actually I’m Lana Myers. Victoria Evans and Kennedy both died, and Lana was born.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
That fat bastard has already been found? Damn him. I should have stabbed him even more for ruining this moment.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
He believed my rapist over me. Just left me.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I won’t tell them a thing,” Laurel says from the living room, proving she’s not as oblivious as I thought.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
personal involvement in this case is fucking with my head, making me have tunnel-vision, and knocking me off my game. He’s winning.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Just make sure those sons of bitches never hurt anyone ever again.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Now I have to let him do his job, trying to find me.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
It’s all cloak and dagger right now. That’s what happens when you’re a serial killer dating a FBI profiler who hunts serial killers. Somehow, my simple life got very complicated.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
It feels good to crave someone and want them.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
He's cute when he's jealous.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
those who strive to be humble detest the ways of the arrogant.
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Their sins stained my soul with so much darkness that their deaths are needed to cleanse me.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I don’t bleed for the world anymore. He saw more than anyone else, and he didn’t bother to care when it mattered the most.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes. —Confucius
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
go on, keeping my tone even, refusing to show too much emotion. I don’t bleed for the world anymore.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Death and life have their determined appointments.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Real knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
The cautious seldom err.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
those who strive to be humble detest the ways of the arrogant
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Chapter 6 The superior man is modest in his speech, but exceeds in his actions. —Confucius
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I’m the best option for keeping me safe.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Monsters can come in many forms.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
No one cared. No one wanted to listen. No one wanted to be bothered with something so horribly, inconceivably evil. They wanted to pretend it just didn’t exist.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Where they die, a nail gets taken.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I’m just sick of lying when I don’t have to.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I need to replace their taunts and evil laughter with the sounds of their screams.
I sleep better with each new scream I get to add. The screams override the scent of their breath, the strikes of their hands, and their dirty, disgusting fingers.
They'll never hurt anyone else. Even if they rise from the dead, they lost their tools of pain.
The rest will join them soon enough.
I can't stop now.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
It's often easier for someone to believe evil can't exist inside someone they love, than to admit they've failed someone who should be more important. We see it too often. The blind eye effect is what we call it.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Lana backs away, saying nothing, but my eyes are on Duke, furiously glaring at him. He glares back, just as furious. “She’s not a prisoner or a criminal. I can’t legally confine her to her damn house, you arrogant asswipe.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
This is for the ones who lost their voice. This is for the ones who wish they could be Lana Myers. This is for the ones people still whisper about. This is for the ones who fight every single day to forget. You’re not alone.
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Apparently all the girls on his team seem to have an issue with me, especially since this is the second one I’ve met and she’s regarding me with a scowl. Don’t these women know that it’s dangerous to piss off a highly trained killer?
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
We had him all wrong. There won’t be animal cruelty in his past. He’ll have been someone gentle, possibly naïve and trusting—too trusting. Trusting enough to have been someone’s victim. Instead of it shattering him; he came back for cold vengeance.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Just as I’m about to leave, Laurel stands on shaky legs and makes her way to me. I kneel just as she tosses her arms around my neck, catching me off guard. Slowly, carefully, I hug her back. “Kill all the monsters,” she whispers. “That way they don’t hurt anyone else.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I can't have children," I whisper hoarsely.
His head rears back, and his forehead creases in confusion. I could have just lied. I could have glossed over it and promised I couldn't get pregnant.
I'm just sick of lying when I don't have to.
"Why?"
Instead of telling him another lie outright, I point the scars on my side. "I lost a lot that night," I say quietly.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I trust him. It’s insane to trust someone so freely after being hurt so irrevocably in the past, but I do. I trust him completely, and there’s no doubt in my mind that he’d never intentionally hurt me. I can feel it in the way he kisses me. I can see it in his eyes when he bares his soul. I can taste it in the way he breathes. And I sense his honesty like a predator can sense its prey’s fear.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
You have no legal right to be here. Just as you said. I can’t stop you from loitering on the street, but you’re officially trespassing if you stay on my property. Be gone before I get back, or, ironically enough, I’ll call the cops.” He groans and curses, running a hand through his already disheveled hair. “Where are you going?” “Wherever the fuck I want to,” I say, flipping him off as I get into the car.
”
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S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
You told me to have a protective detail, and I agreed,” she says quietly. I swallow down my words as she continues. “You told me to let a stranger stay in my house; I agreed, even though I didn’t want to. I take someone with me when I leave. I’ve put my business deals on hold to appease you, not traveling and risking myself. I’ve sat in a protective bubble, answering all your calls and texts promptly so you don’t worry about me.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
To see and listen to the wicked is already the beginning of wickedness.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Never contract friendship with a man who is not better than thyself. —Confucius
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Real knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance. —Confucius LANA My mother was a Confucius woman when she needed some motivational words. My father was an Einstein man when everything was crashing down on him. Neither of the dead wise men are helping me out right now. Neither are my parents and all their words of wisdom. To be fair, they probably never would have condoned me stealing another girl’s identity, taking her inheritance, and using it to get some very disturbing revenge on all the men who scarred me for life.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
She’s been dead since the day he took her, even if her heart is still beating right now.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
It’s often easier for someone to believe evil can’t exist inside someone they love, than to admit they’ve failed someone who should be more important. We see it too often. The blind eye effect is what we call it,” I say absently.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
He saved the child. The child feels safe because he’s the dark knight that slayed the monster who has haunted her for months, ever since her disappearance. Our unsub handed her over to this woman, who he swore would keep her safe. She trusted him. She was cared for by Lindy, and the bond formed instantly.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
He left you all alone finally. Tell me, princess, are you afraid of the Boogeyman?
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I jog upstairs, head into my secret room, and touch the apple on my desk. It’s a wax apple, brilliantly red, and there are seven nails sticking out of it. Still many more to go.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
The truck that fucking passed us,” I say through clenched teeth. “It was him. He even blew his motherfucking horn!
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”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
He knows calligraphy?
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
I can handle a lot of things, but I won’t let you walk all over me, then refuse to offer me the same peace of mind.
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))
“
Without feelings of respect, what is there to distinguish men from beasts? —Confucius
”
”
S.T. Abby (Sidetracked (Mindf*ck, #2))