April Fools Day Quotes

I like to schedule dentist appointments for March 32, otherwise known as April Fool’s Day.

Some people can't be fooled on April Fool's Day because they were fooled too many times during their entire lifetime.

Look: this is January the worst onslaught is ahead of us Don't be lured by these soft grey afternoons these sunsets cut from pink and violet tissue-paper by the thought the days are lengthening Don't let the solstice fool you: our lives will always be a stew of contradictions the worst moment of winter can come in April when the peepers are stubbornly still and our bodies plod on without conviction and our thoughts cramp down before the sheer arsenal of everything that tries us: this battering, blunt-edged life

The time we are given for parenting is so short, passes so quickly and is jumbled up with so many other priorities and disruptions that, in the end, we come to doubt that we used it in the best interests of our children.

By now the streets of Kalaupapa were filled with people racing for high ground - sick people crying "Tsunami!" as nature played yet another mean trick on them, God's last best joke at their expense. It was, after all, April Fool's Day.

I have taken the opportunity to update the book and include new theoretical and observational results obtained since the book was first published (on April Fools’ Day, 1988).

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have taken the opportunity to update the book and include new theoretical and observational results obtained since the book was first published (on April Fools’ Day, 1988). I have

Meanwhile 1st April to lie as if they were honest throughout the year.

Per se, a prank is meant to thank. Rethink and thank the soft spank. And fill in the blank, Not even over drank, Knelt when they made you walk the plank.

I'm not a fan of April Fools' Day. I can take a joke; I just don't want to BE the joke.

April Fools' is the only day to take people seriously.

A GENIUS IS HE WHO FINDS THE FOOL IN HIM, HAPPY FOOLS DAY

I have taken the opportunity to update the book and include new theoretical and observational results obtained since the book was first published (on April Fools’ Day, 1988). I have included a new chapter on wormholes and time travel. Einstein’s General Theory of Relativity seems to offer the possibility that we could create and maintain wormholes, little tubes that connect different regions of space-time. If so, we might be able to use them for rapid travel around the galaxy or travel back in time. Of course, we have not seen anyone from the future (or have we?) but I discuss a possible explanation for this

LIVE FROM THE PASTA FARMS, THIS HAS BEEN AL DENTE: The British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC) aired a documentary on its new show Panorama about Spaghetti growers in Switzerland-- on April 1, 1957. The joke broadcast showed Swiss spaghetti farmers picking fresh spaghetti from 'spaghetti trees' and preparing the spaghetti for market. It also mentioned that the pasta farmers had a bumper crop partly because of the 'virtual disappearance of the spaghetti weevil.' Soon after the broadcast, the BBC received phone calls from viewers eager to know if spaghetti really grew on trees and how they might grow a spaghetti tree of their own. To the last question, the BBC reportedly replied that they should 'place a sprig of spaghetti in a tin of tomato sauce and hope for the best.

EARLY ONE DARK April morning a few years ago I was sitting in my living room in central Copenhagen, wrapped in a blanket and yearning for spring, when I opened that day’s newspaper to discover that my adopted countrymen had been anointed the happiest of their species in something called the Satisfaction with Life Index, compiled by the Department of Psychology at the University of Leicester. I checked the date on the newspaper: it wasn’t 1 April.

On April 1, the Holy Spirit descended into the body of President Jerry Falwell I, who, it turned out, was in the last year of his life on this world, and God spoke. He wanted them to form God’s Church of the Evangels and he wanted all Americans to have a chance to convert to that true church. Those who did not would be an abomination to the Lord. All the leaders present recognized the voice of the Holy Spirit and fell to their knees and all instantly joined the newly -formed church. The Great Conversion had begun. Interestingly enough, April 1 used to be known as April Fool’s Day and people played practical jokes on each other , but of course it is now Jerry Falwell Day and the holiday is celebrated with praises to the Holy Spirit.

hard to do. So, we are going to celebrate. You see, when you all wrote those nature poems the other day, you had all been secretly entered in”—he puts his arms up and raises his voice—“the first annual Fantastico Poetry Award.” Oh, great. Another thing for Shay to brag about. I look over at Albert and hope he will win instead. He’s hoping so, too. I can tell by how he pulls his chair in more, like he’s getting ready. I think that Suki has a good shot as well. “So,” Mr. Daniels begins, “this poem is a splendid surprise. Great work. And I am very happy to give the first annual Fantastico Poetry Award to . . .” I watch Shay out of the corner of my eye. If she wins, we’ll never hear the end of it. What she does doesn’t make sense. She shows surprise, but it’s followed by disgust. Mr. Daniels’s hand on my shoulder makes me jump. “Congratulations, Ally,” Mr. Daniels says. This can’t be. It’s too early for April Fool’s Day. I look over at Albert and Keisha, wondering if they put a poem in with my name. Mr.

A fool’s errand . . . but so is chipping at a blank concrete wall for twenty-seven years. And when you’re no longer the man who can get it for you and just an old bag-boy, it’s nice to have a hobby to take your mind off your new life. My hobby was looking for Andy’s rock. So I’d hitchhike to Buxton and walk the roads. I’d listen to the birds, to the spring runoff in the culverts, examine the bottles the retreating snows had revealed—all useless non-returnables, I am sorry to say; the world seems to have gotten awfully spendthrift since I went into the slam—and look for hayfields. Most of them could be eliminated right off. No rock walls. Others had rock walls, but my compass told me they were facing the wrong direction. I walked these wrong ones anyway. It was a comfortable thing to be doing, and on those outings I really felt free, at peace. An old dog walked with me one Saturday. And one day I saw a winter-skinny deer. Then came April 23rd, a day I’ll not forget even if I live another fifty-eight years.

One of the things I loved about Chris was his sense of humor, which seemed perfectly matched with mine, even at its most offbeat. April Fools’ Day was always a major highlight. A month before our daughter was due, I woke him up in the middle of the night. “Don’t panic,” I told him, “but I think I’m going into labor.” “Do we have a bag?” he asked, jumping up immediately. “No, no, don’t worry.” I slipped out of bed and went to take a shower. Chris immediately got dressed and, calmly but very quickly, gathered my clothes and packed a suitcase. “I’m ready!” he announced, barging into the bathroom. “Babe, do you know what day it is?” I asked sweetly. It was two A.M., April 1. “Are you kidding me?” he said, disbelieving. I laughed and plunged back into the shower. He quickly got revenge by flushing the toilet, sending a burst of cold water across my body. In retrospect, maybe I’d been a little cruel, but we did love teasing each other. At our wedding, we’d smooshed cake into each other’s faces. That began a tradition that continued at each birthday--whether it was ours or not. The routine never seemed to get old. We’d giggle and laugh, chasing each other as if we were crazy people. Our friends and neighbors got used to it--and learned to stay out of the line of fire.

April. It teaches us everything. The coldest and nastiest days of the year can happen in April. It won’t matter. It’s April. The English word for the month comes from the Roman Aprilis, the Latin aperire: to open, to uncover, to make accessible, or to remove whatever stops something from being accessible. It maybe also partly comes from the name of Aphrodite, Greek goddess of love, whose happy fickleness with various gods mirrors the month’s own showery-sunny fickleness. Month of sacrifice and month of playfulness. Month of restoration, of fertility-festivity. Month when the earth and the buds are already open, the creatures asleep for the winter have woken and are already breeding, the birds have already built their nests, birds that this time last year didn’t exist, busy bringing to life the birds that’ll replace them this time next year. Spring-cuckoo month, grass-month. In Gaelic its name means the month that fools mistake for May. April Fool’s Day also probably marks what was the old end of the new year celebrations. Winter has Epiphany. Spring’s gifts are different. Month of dead deities coming back to life. In the French revolutionary calendar, along with the last days of March, it becomes Germinal, the month of return to the source, to the seed, to the germ of things, which is maybe why Zola gave the novel he wrote about hopeless hope this revolutionary title. April the anarchic, the final month, of spring the great connective.

You know, a government should be a good thing. The Anglo-Saxons and the Germans rejoice in the phenomenon of government. They think that the recipe for human happiness is that you should make your desires and actions concordant with those of the government. So a German and an American will try to make the government work for him, protect him, and he will be more than happy to murder to preserve that wonderful symbiosis. And if he has some money to invest, he will invest it in the government, buying government bonds. He does this regardless of whether his government happens to be trillions of dollars in debt—that is, practically bankrupt. Despite his rhetoric of private enterprise, a Westerner will invest in his government. And we, Eastern and Central Europeans, and particularly Slavs, we all consider our governments to be absolutely the worst in the world. We are ashamed of our governments, and, as a rule, our government is ashamed of us, trying to improve us statistically, to say that we work more and drink less than we do. We think that there's no greater obstacle to human happiness than the government. So even if we have an institution pregnant with democratic potential, such as workers' self-management, we never even bother to attend a meeting unless absolutely forced. And as for voting, we circle any name without looking at whose it is, out of spite. To a Slav, there is nothing more disgusting than voting. We have an aversion to investing trust in any human being. So how could we single out someone we haven't met but whom we know a priori to be a social upstart and climber? So we spend these workers' self-management meetings, where democracy could be practiced, in daydreams of sex and violence.

264. The longest passenger rail service currently running directly between two cities runs from Moscow, Russia to Pyongyang, North Korea, a distance of 6,380 mi (10,267 km). The trip takes 206 hours (8.5 days). 265. There is a popular myth that bats always turn left when exiting a cave but this is not true. In fact, some bats can fly in any direction, and some bats don’t live in caves. 266. The Assyrian New Year is celebrated on the 1st of April. However, this day is better known as April Fools’ Day. 267. A person who looked very like you or even exactly like you once lived or will live on the planet. There’s even a small chance this person lives today and that you will meet one day.

Don't fool April; she always finds an escape. Drained empty, but she still loves herself. Helping someone who is not too strong and taking the right turn in a place that appears to be wrong. Head spins faster than the days; she never forgets herself. Whistling a lullaby in the air, she says goodbye before dropping dead. The floor becomes a crimson pool, wearing shades of cool and telling the world; she's April, who you cannot fool.

Representative Tom Moore Jr. once submitted legislation to the Texas legislature in favor of honoring notorious murderer Albert DeSalvo "for his work in "population control"" as an April Fool's Day joke. Without paying any attention to it, it was unanimously passed.

Jeong-dae, who nonchalantly slid the blackboard cleaner into his book bag. ‘What’re you taking that for?’ ‘To give to my sister.’ ‘What’s she going to do with it?’ ‘Well, she keeps talking about it. It’s her main memory of middle school.’ ‘A blackboard cleaner? Must have been a pretty boring time.’ ‘No, it’s just there was a story connected with it. It was April Fool’s Day, and the kids in her class covered the entire blackboard with writing, for a prank - you know, because the teacher would have to spend ages getting it all off before he could start the lesson. But when he came in and saw it he just yelled, “Who’s classroom monitor this week?” - and it was my sister. The rest of the class carried on with the lesson while she stood out in the corridor, dangling the cloth out of the window and beating it with a stick to bash the chalk dust out. It is funnv, though, isn’t it? Two years at middle school, and that’s what she remembers most.

aanhin pa natin ang april fool’s day? Araw-araw ka namang niloloko.

Frank,” Belinda sounded more drained than angry. “When are you going to stop making excuses for him?” “He had a bad day at practice yesterday,” Hildy went on as if she hadn’t heard. “He’s always weird when he’s been bad at practice.

To show what is still needed, let us examine how an ideal system might reason about the burglar alarm situation of Figure 1.2. Upon receiving the phone call from your neighbor, only the burglary hypothesis is triggered; your decision whether to drive home or stay at work is made solely on the basis of the parameter P(False alarm), which summarizes all other (unexplicated) causes for an alarm sound. After a moment’s reflection, the possibility of an April Fools’ Day joke may

HOW WISE LEARN FROM FOOLS – When I was young fooling was done on only 1st April every year and rest of the days were as usual with honesty and integrity. In the recent days no day goes without fooling and being fooled, we find people act too brilliant, as only a fool knows everything. A wise man knows how little he knows. Never forget as said by --Albert Einstein before God we are equally wise and equally foolish. However we need many fools to be around as Wise men learn more from fools than fools from the wise. Dr.T.V.Rao MD

Technically, we played our first show at Menlo College in Menlo Park, one town over from Palo Alto. That was on April Fool’s Day, ’65.

HAPPY APRIL FOOL’S DAY! Did you prank anyone?

I’m sorry Mr Lichtenstein, but your January birthday means only one thing and that's you're probably conceived on April Fools Day.

Be a man! Put on a mask.

Hello everyone (Fools & Wise Ones)! Welcome to New Month, April! A month known for sunshine, spring vibes & it’s fool’s day. Honestly speaking, it is human nature to think wisely & act foolishly. Isn’t that the truth? We spend hours contemplating the best course of action, only to be tripped up by emotions, impulses or that one extra Gulab Jamun or laddu staring us from our dining table. Sweetheart, Isn’t that just delightful? Here’s to thinking big, acting…well, sometimes a little less big & learning to laugh along the way. Remember, even the wisest person trips on their shoelaces occasionally. But hold on, dear, before you align yourself to a life of perpetual folly, here’s the good news: The fact that we CAN think wisely means we CAN act wisely. I wish & hope that from today itself you will begin to catch yourself in the act of thinking foolishly (every time)… Darling listen – we’ll still have our April Fools’ Day moments (because, let’s face it, sometimes life is the biggest prankster of all). But by acknowledging this human tendency & taking steps to bridge the wisdom-action gap, we can turn this month & every month, into a celebration of our ability to be not just thoughtful creatures, but thoughtful doers. May this month be everything you hope for & more! Happy New Month! Blessings!

Every day of our lives has been an April Fool’s Day. We just never knew it until Covid.

Ironically, it’s only on April Fool’s Day that we are skeptical and not quick to believe the things we read online.

The first thing you have to remember is that we count the days a bit differently. Having 39.6 more minutes each day, and 669 days—or sols, as we call ’em—in a sidereal period, meant that aresians threw out both Greenwich Mean Time and the Gregorian calendar in a.d. 2032, long before the Pax Astra took control of the near-space colonies, way before Mars declared its independence. The Zubrin calendar has twelve months, ranging from 48 to 66 sols in length, each named after a Zodiac constellation; it retroactively began on January 1, 1961, which became Gemini 1, m.y. 1 by local reckoning. The conversion factors from Gregorian to Zubrin calendars are fairly complex, so don’t ask for an explanation here; best to say that one of the first things newcomers from Earth have to realize is that April Fool pranks are even less funny at Arsia Station than they were back in Indiana.

And in fact Hale-Bopp will reach its perihelion on April Fools' Day, which I suppose is fitting - but I think on the whole I'd rather be prone to being fooled than to be too wise a man for wonder.

Poor fool, you are divided at the heart, Lost in its maze of chambers, blood, and love, A heart that will one day beat you to death. — Suji Kwock Kim, from “Monologue For an Onion,” Notes from the Divided Country. (LSU Press; First Edition edition April 1, 2003)

Every day is a Fool's day. This is merely the April one.

49. Ice chest free for all On the off chance that you have a cooler and admittance to a lot of imagine play food (the benevolent children keep in their small scale measured kitchens), Michael Humpreys of Z Barbecues has a trick for you: Get a lot of chocolate boxes and fill them with the phony vegetables or cheddar, or fill the refrigerator with them instead of the genuine article.

Finding Water On Mars As An April Fool’s Prank. Every April Fool’s Day, which is the first day of every April, we all try our hardest to prank and pun each other. All this is done for fun and laughter. According to “Universe Today,” not even big science hotshots like NASA are above a few harmless pranks. Never was this more obvious than in 2005, when NASA pranked the world about finding water on Mars. On March 31, 2005, a teaser was posted on NASA’s Astronomy Picture of the Day website. It was titled “Water on Mars!” with a presentation to follow the next day, on April 1. This left people ecstatic. This was an incredible find for the human race. If there was water on Mars, then that meant there could have been life on Mars at one stage. Science was about to make a huge leap forward. The next day, April 1, 2005, NASA posted their presentation of water on Mars, and it left the whole world either in tears or crying from laughter. Their presentation was a picture of a glass of water standing on top of two Mars chocolate bars. It was water on Mars, but not the kind that everyone was hoping for.

The day after the Martin-Bellinger report, on April Fools Day if anyone noticed, ONI alerted all naval districts that “. . . past experience shows the Axis Powers often begin activities . . . on Saturdays, Sundays and national holidays of the country concerned . . . . Take steps on such days to see that proper watches and precautions are in effect.

Once we’d wrapped season two, in April I headed to Vegas to shoot my first major movie. I was being paid a million dollars to star in Fools Rush In, with Salma Hayek. To this day, it’s probably my best movie.

Every year on April Fools’ we throw a giant Valentine’s Day party, just so we don’t forget. Love happens all the time.

Alex’s espresso; her name badge said… ‘Reenie’. Alex took a sip. Not bad. Slowly, Reenie came back carrying a red plate, as if the food were a highly important telegram. She lowered it onto the yellow tablecloth and Alex wrinkled her nose with a sense of nausea that she’d suffered from lately. On the plate lay a perfect circle of egg and neat runways of bacon. ‘I ordered fruit and porridge, not a cardiac arrest,’ Alex said in an abrupt tone. The parrot squawked again. ‘He’s very friendly,’ called barn owl man’s voice from across the room. ‘Never nipped anyone.’ Alex got to her feet and glowered at the cage, the staff and the manager too. ‘Why is bad service a joke here?’ she asked. ‘You do know what this café is called?’ asked Tom. Oh. As it turned out she didn’t. Alex had always cut Hope short when she’d tried to give any details, and had simply focused on the directions to get to the building. Then she’d been distracted by her phone outside, just as she was going to read its name. He picked up the menu and passed it over. Alex read the front. By now the whole room had fallen silent. Contact lenses gave her perfect vision and it wasn’t April Fool’s Day, so what sort of idiot would call their business Wrong Order Café? ‘A café that purposely delivers the wrong orders? Next, in this parallel universe, you’ll be telling me that the

It is not an April Fool's Day that I feel the blessings of my spiritual mentors and guides.

Fred and George were born on April Fool’s day.

Fred and George were born on April Fool’s Day.

Under the Sun" The days are my consolation. I take one home each night and put it in the case beside my bed and watch it fade in the dark, no matter how shiny it seems at first, no matter how high it stands behind the glass. I keep a few polished for memory's sake, but even they grow tarnished and lost among the others. "Thank you," I say to the dusk each night for another trophy engraved with the cloud code of that particular day—April l0, June 19 ... As for the diamond- studded chalice I glimpsed in a dream, I no longer want it, although I live as if I do to fool myself, throwing quarters at a wall, playing the numbers, singing, "Grief is happy with a stone. See how bright it shines on the dull cold ground.

Reader, if you wrest my words beyond their fair construction, it is you, and not I, that are the April Fool.

If you are not cool, who cares, give a hoot and make a fool out of you

April Fools Day lets too many people think they are funny and so I don’t support that.