Aces Funny Quotes

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Marketing is so powerful that it can make even an extremely untalented musician a one-hundred-hits wonder.
Mokokoma Mokhonoana
I like it when people give me attention! I like being interesting! And these are all things that our societal narrative attaches to sex,” Selena says. For allos, sex is so natural an explanation for behavior that other reasons, such as wanting to dress creatively for its own sake and wanting to be seen just to be seen, can be hard to fathom. “I’m like ‘I want you to stare at me, but I don’t want you to fuck me, and they have nothing to do with each other,’” Selena continues. “And then allos are so funny because they just insist that those have everything to do with each other.
Angela Chen (Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex)
Roarke didn't quite make it to Eve's office. He found her down the corridor, in front of one of the vending machines. She and the machine appeared to be in the middle of a vicious argument. "I put the proper credits in, you blood-sucking, money-grubbing son of a bitch." Eve punctuated this by slamming her fist where the machine's heart would be, if it had one. ANY ATTEMPT TO VANDALIZE, DEFACE, OR DAMAGE THIS UNIT IS A CRIMINAL OFFENSE. The machine spoke in a prissy, singsong voice Roarke was certain was sending his wife's blood pressure through the roof. THIS UNIT IS EQUIPPED WITH SCANEYE, AND HAS RECORDED YOUR BADGE NUMBER. DALLAS, LIEUTENANT EVE. PLEASE INSERT PROPER CREDIT, IN COIN OR CREDIT CODE, FOR YOUR SELECTION. AND REFRAIN FROM ATTEMPTING TO VANDALIZE, DEFACE, OR DAMAGE THIS UNIT. "Okay, I'll stop attempting to vandalize, deface, or damage you, you electronic street thief. I'll just do it." She swung back her right foot, which Roarke had cause to know could deliver a paralyzing kick from a standing position. But before she could follow through he stepped up and nudged her off balance. "Please, allow me, Lieutenant." "Don't put any more credits in that thieving bastard," she began, then hissed when Roarke did just that. "Candy bar, I assume. Did you have any lunch?" "Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know it's just going to keep stealing if people like you pander to it." "Eve, darling, it's a machine. It does not think." "Ever hear of artificial intelligence, ace?" "Not in a vending machine that dispenses chocolate bars.
J.D. Robb (Betrayal in Death (In Death, #12))
Sher just laughed, shaking her head in genuine bemusement. “Just think it through Ace. I’m sure the answer will come to you… eventually.” Jake sat there in silence, staring at the closed door to Sher’s bedroom. What had just happened here? Well, he’d just knocked back Sher’s invitation to have sex for starters. Oh my God, what had he just done?
Jane Cousins (Two For The Show (By The Numbers, #2))
What if you didn't have time to draw them on one day? Or what if it rained and your eyebrows started dripping off? Hopefully her eye pencil is waterproof.
Lauren Barnholdt (Aces Up)
Never in a million years did she expect to be doing her first real mission with Agent Ace Knight, the number one spy in history!
Austin Stack (Kat Doggers: Superspy: Book 1 of the Kat Doggers Series)
The revolution" -the one that helps all of us-"will not come on the tidal wave of your next multiple orgasm you had with your seven partners on the floor of your communal living space.
Angela Chen, Ace: What Asexuality Reveals about Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex.
He’s so mad it’s not funny.
D. G. Compton (The Steel Crocodile (Ace Books #78575))
Now, I'm not claiming to have won any intelligence contests lately. I say lately because the last time I actually entered an intelligence contest was like seven years ago. It was pretty easy to sign up. I just had to send this guy two thousand dollars and answer some pretty tough questions from memory. They were mainly about my family history and some of my personal information--- stuff like my social security number and whatnot. I don't like to brag, but I aced it. The guy even sent me a framed certificate that now proudly hangs in the new office I built after we declared bankruptcy due to some random identity theft. You think a fifth grader could do all that? I doubt it. Who are smarter now?
Tim Hawkins
what exactly they are. Let’s do a little digging and find out what these terms mean. What is fear? Fear can be so intense! It can make us react in absurd ways, often in ways that end up being quite funny in hindsight (but usually anything but funny in the moment!) It's quite normal to “freeze up” when you're faced with an intensely fearful situation. The danger (or, oftentimes, the perceived danger) strikes, and you can end up feeling quite crazy and out of control, out of tune with your usual self. Sometimes fear can translate into physical symptoms. If your hands and feet feel weird, you can't breathe right, your chest hurts, you're tired, dizzy, or you feel like you'll pass out, chances are fear has paid you a not so welcome visit! And anxiety? Anxiety is when your body and mind freak out because they believe that something unpleasant will happen in the future. There’s not a single soul on the planet who hasn’t felt anxiety at one point or another, whether it’s anxiety over going to the doctor, or perhaps anxiety over meeting new people. While fear is an emotion which is focused on the present moment, anxiety involves projection into the future, asking yourself “what if?” Some people are more prone to this sort of thinking than others, but it’s all but impossible to escape anxiety altogether. Dealing with Both: Although anxiety and fear are technically two different emotions, they often crop up together (lovely, isn’t it!) On a more positive note, the ways of dealing and coping with these emotions are also quite similar.
Jamie Thorne (Middle School Survival Guide: How to Navigate Friendships, Tackle Peer Pressure, Ace Your Studies, Stay Safe Online, Understand Money Basics, Prepare for the Future, and Much More!)
I'm like I want you to stare at me, but I don't want you to fuck me, and they have nothing to do with each other. And then allos are so funny because they just insist that those have everything to do with each other.
Angela Chen, Ace: What Asexuality Reveals about Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex.
Comyn thought it was funny. It was very funny, indeed, that men making the second Big Jump in history, that men going faster and farther than any men but five had ever gone before, separated only by metal walls from the awfulness of infinity, should sit and play games with little plastic cards and pretend they were not where they were.
Leigh Brackett (The Big Jump (Vintage Ace SF, G-683))
It’s weird seeing black-and-white photos of Black people sometimes. TV had me thinking we didn’t exist until the eighties.
Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé (Ace of Spades)
In the mirror of a thousand mirrors, I've seen small bubbles, so funny, it could rain!
Petra Hermans (Voor een betere wereld)