Wundersmith Quotes

I don’t know what to tell you, Mog.’ Jupiter sighed. ‘Some people are brave bullies. Some people are friendly cowards.

Morrigan didn’t like the sound of the Goal-Setting and Achieving Club for Highly Ambitious Youth, which met on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday evenings, and all day Sunday. But she thought she could probably get on board with Introverts Utterly Anonymous, which promised no meetings or gatherings of any sort, ever.

One thing you all should know about me: I’ve got very high biscuit standards.

You bought poisonous mushrooms,” Mahir said, blinking at him, “from somewhere called a murdergarden?” Francis shrugged and said again, “They have a little shop.

How did you find it?” “Well, it took me a while,” he said. “But luckily I know lots of people who know lots of things. And I’m nosy by nature, aren’t I?

It was a small act of pettiness, but by gentle, tenderhearted Martha’s standards, it was a declaration of all-out war, and Morrigan adored her for it.

Morrigan frowned. She sometimes felt that her true knack had nothing to do with being a Wundersmith. That it was, in fact, her remarkable ability to assume the worst. It came, of course, from a lifetime of believing she was cursed, and it seemed to be stitched into the very fabric of her being, even now. Telling her not to worry about bad things happening around her was like telling Hawthorne not to get excited about dragons, or Jupiter not to be ginger.

Their motto is If Not for Us, You’d All Be Speaking Zombie.

Cook used to tell stories about angels,” said Morrigan, recalling her family home, Crow Manor. “The Angel of Death, the Angel of Mercy, the Angel of Ruined Dinners…

I was having the best dream,” he croaked. “I was flying over a jungle on the back of a dragon and I fell off and tumbled down into the trees… and then I got adopted by a gang of monkeys. They made me their king.

I have no time for childish problems. Should any arise, you will either take them up with your unit conductor, or squash them deep down in the pit of your soul where they shall no longer bother you. Have I made myself clear?

Frank the vampire dwarf, party planner extraordinaire

then—casually defying the law of gravity—proceeded to walk skyward up the wall,

Her voice made Morrigan think of a sheet of glass: perfectly smooth all along its surface, with a sharp edge concealed at the end.

Welcome, Unit 919, to the first day of the rest of your lives.

Where are you going, o son of the morning?” he sang softly. When he sang, Squall’s voice was unsettlingly gentle and sweet. Much lovelier than Morrigan’s. It shouldn’t sound like that, she thought. It should sound ugly and jagged. Like his heart.

She cast a look at the octopus-shaped armchair in the corner, which gave a sinister flick of its tentacles. The maid shuddered. “I do wish you’d get rid of that thing. It’s a nightmare to dust.

She was dressed all in black, from her heavy boots to the pair of woolly earmuffs hanging around her neck. (Morrigan approved.)

She’d never met Israfel in her life and yet she couldn’t bear the thought that he was unhappy. She felt a strange urge to give him a biscuit. Or a puppy. Something.

The door swung shut in Jupiter’s wake. Morrigan threw a piece of toast at it.

Morrigan shook her head, trying—and failing—to control a smile that was twitching at the corners of her mouth. She felt a warm, sunshiny glow right in the center of her chest, as if a cat had curled up there and was purring contentedly.

Perhaps I should have murdered you too, you wretched disappointment,” he snarled, and for an instant his face was the foul mask of a man possessed, the black-eyed, black-mouthed Wundersmith of legend emerging in a moment of uncontrolled fury. Then it was gone. And the mild, perfectly contained man was back. Just like that.

No, Francis, I got it from the shop like a normal person.

Seeing her own name spelled out in dragon fire was only the latest in a series of firsts, but she had to admit it was one of the better ones so far.

Morrigan only just managed to stop herself from reaching out and stroking them. Might be weird, she thought.

Don’t forget who finished the Show Trial in the number one spot on the leaderboard.” He paused for a moment, then added, “It was you. In case you actually did forget.

The real, actual Paximus Luck? Plucky?” Mahir clarified. “The famous master illusionist slash stealth prankster slash vigilante street artist?

There was something almost comforting about the presence of these black-cloaked strangers staring down at her from the trees.

Elder Alioth Saga—who was, in fact, a large talking bull.

Jupiter made a space on the sofa for Morrigan to sit, delicately removing items of rubbish and placing them in the trash… then he got carried away and spent the next forty minutes tidying, wiping down surfaces, and making the room as habitable as he possibly could. He didn’t ask Morrigan to help, and Morrigan didn’t offer. She wasn’t touching this health and safety hazard with a ten-foot pole.

He gently pressed the grouting between the bricks with his fingertips, leaned in to sniff it, and then gave the wall a tentative lick. Morrigan gave him a look of horror. “Ugh, stop that. What are you doing?

Cascade Towers!” Jupiter shouted over the roaring, rushing sound of a waterfall as they lunged out from between the alley walls, gasping for breath. Not just a waterfall, though—a dozen waterfalls, maybe more. Some were vast, impenetrable white-water curtains that crashed spectacularly to the ground; others delicate and crystalline with a sound like tinkling glass chimes. It was a symphony of water, falling from nowhere and disappearing into nothing, arranged in the three-dimensional form of a glorious, glittering skyscraper.

Dame Chanda Kali, the famous soprano and Dame Commander of the Order of Woodland Whisperers, launched into a very theatrical version of the birthday song (which immediately attracted three robins, a badger, and a family of squirrels to worship adoringly at her feet).

idea this would happen. I didn’t know Squall could—’ ‘I know you didn’t!’ Morrigan cut in. ‘Don’t be ridiculous. It’s not your fault.’ ‘It is – partly, at least. I should have realised the danger you were in. I should have known Squall would take advantage if he could. I’ve been preoccupied for months – so focused on Cassiel and Paximus Luck and Alfie Swann, when I should have been focused on what was happening right in front of me.’ ‘Cassiel!’ Morrigan said, sitting up straight. ‘I forgot all about him! So, what happened to him? And Paximus Luck?’ ‘The Stealth has a lead on Paximus, which they’re following across the border into the Republic – that’s strictly confidential. But as for Cassiel,’ Jupiter shrugged, looking baffled, ‘I honestly have no idea. I’ve chewed through more resources at the League of Explorers than I can possibly justify, looking for him on-realm and off. We’ve handed it over to the Celestial Observation Group for now. They don’t quite have our reach, but they can watch the skies. They’ll keep me informed.’ ‘So you don’t think it was anything to do with Squall or the Ghastly Market?’ He didn’t answer immediately. Staring at the floor, he sat and breathed in the lemon smoke.

They stood up and were just about to flee the séance when the Marvelous Malau stood also, pointed directly at Morrigan, and declared in a sharp, ringing voice— “You breathed fire.” The laughter died in Morrigan’s throat. She faltered, eager to leave but seemingly rooted to the spot. Malau tilted his head to the side, a curious little frown creasing the spot between his eyes. “You breathed fire.” His voice was suddenly commanding and clear. There were no slurred consonants, no fumbled words. “Like a dragon. Did you enjoy it?” Morrigan blinked. She looked sideways at Hawthorne and then at Jupiter, who both appeared equally shocked. The séance circle had turned in their direction now and were all peering at Morrigan with great interest. Morrigan felt her face grow hot. She couldn’t, of course, admit to such a thing. “No. No, I never did that.” “Yes,” said Malau flatly. “You did.” How did he know? Perhaps the man wasn’t such a charlatan after all. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Morrigan insisted, in a voice as steely as she could make it. Jupiter stood up suddenly, his movements elegant and precise. He tilted his head and took a step closer, staring at her face. “I think you know exactly what I’m talking about,” he said.

But in the end, I just couldn't choose between making him drool through the whole thing, speak in a baby voice, or drop his trousers at the end and shout 'BAZZY WANT POTTY.'' Cadence grinned. 'So I went with all three.' Fireworks and water slides and rock concerts were fine, Morrigan thought. But this, truly, was her favourite moment of the summer so far.

Some people are brave bullies. Some people are friendly cowards.

She may be a Wundersmith, but truly from today onward, she is our Wundersmith

Mog, listen to me. I know that Wundersmiths can be good." He leaned forward and fixed her with a serious, searching look. "I know it because I know you. You are a Wundersmith. And you are good. I don't need any more proof than that.

But if they believed the money really was on the table, they must believe Morrigan truly could be a Wundersmith, and everyone knew Wundersmiths were dangerous... which made her wonder why they dared to come anywhere near her. "Folks'll do anything for money like that," Kedgeree said when she'd asked him about it. "Greed trumps fear.

Secondly, that the boy standing to her right—gangly-limbed, curly-headed, one corner of his mouth smeared with the remnants of a bedtime chocolate—was her best friend in the whole world. Hawthorne Swift rubbed his eyes and grinned at her blearily.

These were supposed to be her brothers and sisters. Loyal for life. But with a single word, they were looking at her as if she was their enemy.

Her voice was like steel. “You are a unit now. You are responsible for each other. You are accountable to each other. Therefore, if anyone—anyone at all—is found to have broken our trust…” Elder Quinn paused, her face grave. She looked at each one of them in turn, until finally her gaze landed on Morrigan. “…then all nine of you will face expulsion from Wunsoc. For life.

Kedgeree the concierge and Martha the maid held armfuls of presents, beaming brightly. And Fenestra, the giant Magnificat and head of housekeeping, used the commotion as a cover to discreetly swipe a huge pawful of pink icing.

Spitznogle

Darling, look—a child, here in Bohemia. How frightful!

The thing you must remember above all else, scholars, is this: You. Are. Not. Important.

hodgepodge

Ghastly Market?

Arch is in the teaching hospital, having the fingers on his left hand broken and re-set for maximum

In fact, only Hawthorne (who had, after all, been riding dragons since he could walk) seemed politely unfazed.

She had seen him bend iron with a flick of the wrist, create fire with a whisper, destroy her family home with a click of his fingers and rebuild it in an instant.

Moments later, the world stuttered back to life.

I couldn’t decide what to come as, so Mum made me a pirate-zombie-robot-dinosaur costume and—” Hawthorne stopped abruptly when he saw Morrigan’s face. He looked down at his ensemble. “What, too much?