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The typical characteristics of the egocentric mentality are arrogance and bravado, but even a submissive
personality who is seemingly void of ego can also be self-centered and selfish. He is consumed by his own pain, filled with self-pity, and unable to feel anyone else’s pain while drowning in his own. Such a person experiences no real connection to anyone outside of himself, despite his seemingly noble nature. He will not—cannot—burden himself unless he receives a larger payout in the form of acceptance or approval. His taking is disguised as giving. His fear is dressed up as love. (He may also be motivated by the need to assuage feelings of guilt or inadequacy, yet still his aim is to reduce his own suffering, not someone else’s.)
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David J. Lieberman (Mindreader: The New Science of Deciphering What People Really Think, What They Really Want, and Who They Really Are)