The Storey Treehouse Quotes

THE 100 PERCENT TOTALLY DANGER-PROOF FUTURE IS AMAZING!’ we shout. Terry runs into the wall again. I jump back into the shark’s mouth.

No detective ever solved a mystery without the help of a hot jam doughnut.

crustaceans?

She wasn’t

water!’ says

ANTS!

this?’ ‘It would make a great head for our scarecrow,’ says Terry. ‘I didn’t know you had a scarecrow,’ says Jill. ‘We don’t,’ says Terry, ‘but if we did this head would be perfect!’ ‘No way,’ I say. ‘I don’t want to see that man’s head ever again. I hated him.’ ‘Yeah,’ says Jill, ‘so did I.’ ‘Oh, did you know him, too?’ says Terry. ‘Yes! Don’t you remember? I was on board his ship when you and Andy were captured. I’ll never forget my first sight of you, Terry! You looked like you were wearing a nappy!’ ‘It wasn’t a nappy,’ says Terry. ‘I was wearing emergency self-inflating underpants. They get a bit baggy when they deflate.’ ‘And Andy was so scared he was crying,’ says Jill. ‘I was not crying,’ I say. ‘It was just spray from

let

YOU

An artist’s impression of what it would look like if Mr Big Nose’s nose exploded.

sketches

Boris eats a whole couch. ‘Ah,’ he says, licking his lips, ‘just like the couches Mother used to bake!

what’s the alternative? We can’t just

waves to surf …

desk.

BARKY THE BARKING DOG SHOW

dance contest …

ABOVE: An artist’s impression of what it would look like if Mr Big Nose’s nose exploded.

bearer of good news,’ says Bill, ‘but I’d better be on my way.’ He

scooter back down the path he’s cleared to our front door and disappears into the overgrown forest. ‘I had the most amazing dream while we were asleep,’ says Terry. ‘I dreamed we added another 13

a haunted house,

my Ninja Snails. ‘Watch this!’ ‘Attack!’ ‘Fly!

Beatrix is kneeling beside him, fanning his face. ‘Are you okay, Boris?’ says Beatrix. ‘Never felt better!’ says Boris, suddenly leaping up and stretching out to his full height.

textas

a vegetable vaporiser,

play.

Mount Everest!

Hey, I know,’ says Terry. ‘Why don’t

If life gets tough, what do you have that you can always count on? A Your fingers. ‘But we have to write this book,’ says Terry.

BY ANDY GRIFFITHS AND TERRY DENTON Just Tricking! Just Annoying! Just Stupid! Just Crazy! Just Disgusting! Just Shocking! Just Macbeth! Just Doomed! The Bad Book The Very Bad Book The Cat on the Mat is Flat The Big Fat Cow That Goes Kapow What Bumosaur is That? What Body Part is That? The 13-Storey Treehouse The 26-Storey Treehouse The 39-Storey Treehouse The 52-Storey Treehouse The 65-Storey Treehouse The 78-Storey Treehouse Once Upon a Slime: 45 fun ways to get writing ... FAST! The Treehouse Fun Book The Treehouse Fun Book 2

If you’re like most of our readers, you’re probably wondering where we get all the ideas for our books from. Well, sometimes we think them up. Other times they are based on stuff that actually happens. Like this book, for instance. It all started one morning when I got up and went down to get some breakfast.

Case

Lots

better

canary

Edward

climb

going

We

having

Well,’ says Mr Big Nose, ‘I could use an enthusiastic filing monster like you in my office at Big Nose Books.’ ‘Oh, that would be wonderful,’ says the monster. ‘I always wanted to get into publishing. It starts with P, one of my favourite letters.’ Terry giggles. ‘P,’ he says.

waiting

race. She drives in close and uses her wheel spike to destroy Terencius’s wheel.

H.G.

Leave it to me,’ says the inspector, leaping out of

blasted filing monster,’ says One-eyed Pete.

THE 13-STOREY MONKEY HOUSE

OPEN THE TREEHOUSE DOOR OR ELSE!

driftfire.

SOS’.

bravo, bravo!’ says Terry. ‘That was il magnifico de stupendio!’ ‘Thank you,’ says Mr Big Nose, taking a big bow.

What demands an answer but asks no question? A A telephone.

You’re going to come with

Great idea!’ I say. ‘Let’s load

Look at that,’ I say, ‘Cowhouse: The Mooo-vie! Now do you believe me?’ ‘Shh!’ says Terry. ‘The mooo-vie’s about to start.’ ‘Hey,’ says Terry. ‘Those cows look just like us.’ ‘Yeah,’ I say. ‘Except they’re cows!’ ‘Shh!’ says Jill. ‘Hey,’ says Terry, ‘that’s just like when my pants were on fire.’ ‘I know,’ I say. ‘That’s where they got the idea!’ ‘Shh,’ says Jill. ‘Hey,’ says Jill, ‘that’s just like what happened to Silky.’ ‘No, it’s not,’ says Terry. ‘She turned into a catnary, not an udderfly.’ ‘Shh!’ I say. ‘Hey,’ says Terry, ‘that’s just like my Ninja Snails.’ ‘I know,’ I say. ‘Those cows have stolen all our stories.’ ‘Shh!’ says Jill. ‘Hey,’ says Terry, ‘that’s just like when the shark ate my underpants.’ ‘Duh!’ I say, jumping up in front of him. ‘Don’t you get it yet?’ ‘Sit down, Andy,’ says Jill. ‘I can’t see the mooo-vie.’ ‘Cows are funny,’ says Terry. ‘They’re also thieves,’ I say. ‘They stole that idea from Barky the Barking Dog.’ ‘Shh,’ says Jill. ‘I can’t hear what Mooey is saying.’ ‘Remember when we had an epic interstellar space battle, Andy?’ says Terry. ‘I sure do,’ I say. ‘And it looks like the cows do too. They are such copycats.’ ‘I think you mean copycows,’ says Jill. ‘Oh, that’s so sweet,’ says Jill. ‘But it’s OUR story,’ I say. ‘No, it’s not,’ says Terry. ‘We’re best friends not barn buddies.’ ‘Hey!’ says Terry. ‘That’s exactly how our story ends … Wait a minute … WAIT a minute … Hang on … Just one more minute … ‘THOSE THIEVING COWS STOLE OUR MOVIE!