The Narcissism Epidemic Quotes

The only crime is pride.

The narc has been living in denial of their humanity and normal vulnerable feelings for so long there is an entire life time of unexpressed, repressed emotions rotting in the depths of their psyche. This is why they cannot stand to be alone. In that stillness they start to notice the stink coming up from the basement.

Do not seek your worth in someone else. Your worth is inside you, realize this and then find a partner worthy of you. Never stay if they do not know your worth.

I remember clearly the deaths of three men. One was the richest man of the century, who, having clawed his way to wealth through the souls and bodies of men, spent many years trying to buy back the love he had forfeited and by that process performed great service to the world and, perhaps, had much more than balanced the evils of his rise. I was on a ship when he died. The news was posted on the bulletin board, and nearly everyone recieved the news with pleasure. Several said, "Thank God that son of a bitch is dead." Then there was a man, smart as Satan, who, lacking some perception of human dignity and knowing all too well every aspect of human weakness and wickedness, used his special knowledge to warp men, to buy men, to bribe and threaten and seduce until he found himself in a position of great power. He clothed his motives in the names of virtue, and I have wondered whether he ever knew that no gift will ever buy back a man's love when you have removed his self-love. A bribed man can only hate his briber. When this man died the nation rang with praise... There was a third man, who perhaps made many errors in performance but whose effective life was devoted to making men brave and dignified and good in a time when they were poor and frightened and when ugly forces were loose in the world to utilize their fears. This man was hated by few. When he died the people burst into tears in the streets and their minds wailed, "What can we do now?" How can we go on without him?" In uncertainty I am certain that underneath their topmost layers of frailty men want to be good and want to be loved. Indeed, most of their vices are attempted short cuts to love. When a man comes to die, mo matter what his talents and influence and genius, if he dies unloved his life must be a failure to him and his dying a cold horror....we should remember our dying and try so to live that our death brings no pleasure to the world.

Forget the past, you cannot change it. Always remember the lesson, and stay the hell away from your abuser.

Looking for someone to tell me how great I am, do everything for me and don't dare want anything from me. Skills... Fooled easily, kind, loving, smart with low self love. Willing to keep quiet while I abuse you. People with boundaries need not apply. Call Narcissist 555-123-4567.

And the problem was that there was a positive epidemic of narcissism, encouraged by commercial manipulation and by the shallow values of Hollywood films. And interestingly enough, the real growth area was male narcissism.

Increasingly, we are emptying the connection, respect, and empathy out of one of the most important and healthy of human experiences and turning it into branding, showmanship, and posturing. In the midst of this epidemic and cultural shift into narcissism, relationships have taken the hardest hit of all.

When you struggle with fear and trust issues, be aware that you may not trust yourself. You are the first person you must learn to trust.

Americans are experiencing an epidemic in narcissistic behavior in a culture that is intrinsically self-conscious and selfish, and citizens are encouraged to pursue happiness and instant gratification of their personal desires.

Narcissists like watching themselves on videotape, and report gaining self-confidence from gazing at their reflection in a mirror. The Narcissistic Personality Inventory contains items such as “I like to look at myself in the mirror,” “I get upset when people don’t notice how I look when I go out in public,” and “I like to show off my body.” Vanity seems harmless and often is, but vanity often occurs with self-centeredness, which causes so many of the negative behaviors associated with narcissism.

Keep dreaming - when you have a dream, set goals on how to get there. When you work hard for your dreams it makes them that much better when they come true.

Social media has exploded our narcissism. “Facebragging” has become a new slang term for the way that social media has enabled us to shamelessly self-promote, self-congratulate, and generally make public fools of ourselves. As Jean Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, authors of The Narcissism Epidemic, have pointed out, there’s a kind of democratization on the web, where everyone’s opinion has been elevated (or deflated) to a common level. Journalists who fight to present information with clarity and objectivity find themselves contradicted and shouted down by raging bloggers and commenters with no actual knowledge of whatever circumstance they may be reporting. Self-expression on the web has led to a sense of entitlement, a belief that “everybody’s opinion is just as valid as everyone else’s.”2 Andrew Keen refers to the phenomenon as “ignorance meets egoism, meets bad taste, meets mob rule.”3 It’s a world where the way up is to be louder, more flashy, more harsh and outspoken.

As a child of a narcissistic mother I was never told I could do anything right. Disapproval was the “normal” of my life, I was never taught to believe in myself, nor was I guided to better choices. I was alone in figuring out life. Deep inside my self-esteem was uncertain and unsure, on the surface I looked confident because I was told to act that way.

Some researchers, such as psychologist Jean Twenge, say this new world where compliments are better than sex and pizza, in which the self-enhancing bias has been unchained and allowed to gorge unfettered, has led to a new normal in which the positive illusions of several generations have now mutated into full-blown narcissism. In her book The Narcissism Epidemic, Twenge says her research shows that since the mid-1980s, clinically defined narcissism rates in the United States have increased in the population at the same rate as obesity. She used the same test used by psychiatrists to test for narcissism in patients and found that, in 2006, one in four U.S. college students tested positive. That’s real narcissism, the kind that leads to diagnoses of personality disorders. In her estimation, this is a dangerous trend, and it shows signs of acceleration. Narcissistic overconfidence crosses a line, says Twenge, and taints those things improved by a skosh of confidence. Over that line, you become less concerned with the well-being of others, more materialistic, and obsessed with status in addition to losing all the restraint normally preventing you from tragically overestimating your ability to manage or even survive risky situations. In her book, Twenge connects this trend to the housing market crash of the mid-2000s and the stark increase in reality programming during that same decade. According to Twenge, the drive to be famous for nothing went from being strange to predictable thanks to a generation or two of people raised by parents who artificially boosted self-esteem to ’roidtastic levels and then released them into a culture filled with new technologies that emerged right when those people needed them most to prop up their self-enhancement biases. By the time Twenge’s research was published, reality programming had spent twenty years perfecting itself, and the modern stars of those shows represent a tiny portion of the population who not only want to be on those shows, but who also know what they are getting into and still want to participate. Producers with the experience to know who will provide the best television entertainment to millions then cull that small group. The result is a new generation of celebrities with positive illusions so robust and potent that the narcissistic overconfidence of the modern American teenager by comparison is now much easier to see as normal.

In such a self-centered society, many people have gone to the extreme of narcissism—being solely concerned about their own personal well-being and agendas while excluding and exploiting others. Narcissism is not only epidemic but is also a pandemic of our times that has been normalized and accepted. Self-serving, narcissistic people are incapable and unwilling to love due to a lack of authentic self and love for one’s self and others.” — Sepideh Irvani, PsyD

Understanding the narcissism epidemic is important because its long-term consequences are destructive to society. American culture’s focus on self-admiration has caused a flight from reality to the land of grandiose fantasy. We have phony rich people (with interest-only mortgages and piles of debt), phony beauty (with plastic surgery and cosmetic procedures), phony athletes (with performance-enhancing drugs), phony celebrities (via reality TV and YouTube), phony genius students (with grade inflation), a phony national economy (with $11 trillion of government debt), phony feelings of being special among children (with parenting and education focused on self-esteem), and phony friends (with the social networking explosion). All this fantasy might feel good, but unfortunately, reality always wins. The mortgage meltdown and the resulting financial crisis are just one demonstration of how inflated desires eventually crash to earth.

I say that the modern 'clerks' [intellectuals] have preached that the State should be strong and care nothing about being just.... -Julien Benda, The Treason of the Intellectuals, p. 107 We must organize the intellectuals. -Willi Munzenberg, communist organizer, 1919 The present situation may be characterized as follows: All our institutions are breaking down, and social chaos rises on every side: (1) the breakdown of the family, of motherhood and fatherhood; (2) the breakdown of morality, especially honesty; (3) the breakdown of Constitutional government and of national security, the phenomenon of the imposter president, cowardly legislators, careerist generals, intelligence officials who are double agents; (4) an educational system that is anti-patriotic; (5) epidemic narcissism, selfishness, entertainment culture and materialism. From all of this we also see the breakdown of the individual into madness – as expressed in the social reinforcement of the above.

Weaknesses in claims about self-esteem have been evident for a long time. In California in the late 1980s, the state governor set up a special taskforce to examine politician John Vasconcellos’s claim that boosting young people’s self-esteem would prevent a range of societal problems (see chapter 1). One of its briefs was to review the relevant literature and assess whether there was support for this new approach. An author of the resulting report wrote in the introduction that ‘one of the disappointing aspects of every chapter in this volume … is how low the associations between self-esteem and its [presumed] consequences are in research to date.’1 Unfortunately, this early expression of concern was largely ignored. Carol Craig reviews more recent warnings about the self-esteem movement in an online article ‘A short history of self-esteem’, citing the research of five professors of psychology. Craig’s article and related documents are worth reading if you are interested in exploring this issue in depth.2 The following is my summary of her key conclusions about self-esteem:        •   There is no evidence that self-image enhancing techniques, aimed at boosting self-esteem directly, foster improvements in objectively measured ‘performance’.        •   Many people who consider themselves to have high self-esteem tend to grossly overestimate their own abilities, as assessed by objective tests of their performance, and may be insulted and threatened whenever anyone asserts otherwise.        •   Low self-esteem is not a risk factor for educational problems, or problems such as violence, bullying, delinquency, racism, drug-taking or alcohol abuse.        •   Obsession with self-esteem has contributed to an ‘epidemic of depression’ and is undermining the life skills and resilience of young people.        •   Attempts to boost self-esteem are encouraging narcissism and a sense of entitlement.        •   The pursuit of self-esteem has considerable costs and may undermine the wellbeing of both individuals and societies. Some of these findings were brought to wider public attention in an article entitled ‘The trouble with self-esteem’, written by psychologist Lauren Slater, which appeared in The New York Times in 2002.3 Related articles, far too many to mention individually in this book, have emerged, alongside many books in which authors express their concerns about various aspects of the myth of self-esteem.4 There is particular concern about what we are doing to our children.

The Narcissism Epidemic, Twenge and Campbell

Your online persona is the real-world equivalent of Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak. Once unseen you become imbued with magical powers, aka the ‘online disinhibition effect’ (ODE). Individuals are bolder, less inhibited and more confident. In related news, psychologists have reported on the rise of the ‘e-personality’, your online presence that amplifies the self-centred nature of human beings. This has led to an ‘epidemic of narcissism’ that manifests in a disinterest in the lives of others. With empathy on the decline and the ‘me me me’ yelp of narcissism on the rise, there’s a dark side brewing. There’s an awful lot of awfulness, online bile spitting, Twitter death threats, cyber bullying and trolling. Once cloaked you can say what you like to whomever you like. You can cause huge upset by saying ​poisonous things from under the cloak of invisibility that you’d never dream of saying to someone’s face. Because in the flesh and blood world, you’re a nice person, right?

Recovery from emotional abuse is a unique journey for everyone. Start by controlling what you can, grab a hold of your new chapter. Learn to let go of the past, because you never really had control of that.

We’re not number one, but we’re number one in thinking we are number one.

Dr. Datura was good. But only a certain type of woman believed him. They were usually the ones looking to be saved. The forlorn ones.

One study conducted by researchers at the University of Michigan analyzed data from almost fourteen thousand college students. What they found was alarming: empathy has been decreasing over the past thirty years, so much so that the college kids in their study measured 40 percent lower in empathy on tests of the trait than their counterparts just a few decades ago. The drop is so startling some researchers have even declared a “narcissism epidemic.

I never mentioned anything about my family, but we talked about narcissism because everyone you hurt was a narcissist. He said that it’s reached the point of becoming an epidemic. Everyone is out for themselves and couldn’t care less who they hurt or what it takes to get what they want. It’s something short of being a human being. It’s a mental illness that wipes out evolution in favor of the knuckle dragger. He said that most shrinks won’t even take them as patients because their disease can’t be cured. They like being animals. They enjoy it. That’s why I wonder why you spared my father. Why didn’t you do everybody a favor and just kill him?” A

In a self-absorbed society with a narcissism epidemic, everyone values image perception over reality. No one cares about being real anymore.

From an ecopsychological standpoint, most people within our Western culture are ill because we no longer have the intact relationships with the natural world that our earth-based ancestors did. As a result, we do not have a deep sense of trust in the world or ourselves, so we often have problems developing an authentic sense of self, forming healthy relationships, and discovering our greatest gifts. In our Western, globalized, corporate reality, we dedicate less and less time to genuine relationship and the nurturing of our unique callings, and we emphasize more and more the separate self, individual achievement, wealth, fame, and vanity. Essentially we collectively suffer from having a poorly developed sense of self. It is no surprise that most of us never develop into mature adults, and even as adults, we tend to fixate on our ego needs. We are bred to become narcissistic, and it is an epidemic in our society.

The silent treatment is a deafening and cruel abuse tactic

Narcissists reward loyalty, on their side, oh golden one.... You think you are safe. The truth is they will quickly discard your ass and flip your golden role to scapegoat. This is the illusion of loyalty.