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On Why It’s A Threat
by Lynne Schmidt
The first time she is catcalled,
she is nineteen years old and
we are walking down the street,
dog leashes in hand, on a college campus
that is not ours but is close enough to be home.
Close enough that I should feel safe to walk my pets, go for a run, exist.
He rolls up, and I bristle when I hear the stop because it’s too soon,
and she mistakes the slowing for the sign at the end of the road.
My ears wait for what may or may not come next and sure enough
his voice rises just loud enough so we can hear it,
“I don’t know which is more beautiful, the dogs, or the girls walking them.”
Beside me, she stills, a deer in the sights of a gun,
eyes wild like prey
ready for fight or flight,
because she is.
Another youngest child seeking protection
when there may not be any safety to be had.
She does not realize she walks beside a bomb
who marched in DC against a rapist in seat,
who has been fighting off men like this since her knuckles could bleed.
I ignite for all the times she will be yelled at and
all the times my oldest sister has thrown me behind her
when the vehicles stop and the car doors open.
I position my body between her and this man,
the way my sister did for me,
a shell of a shield if need be,
grip the leash tighter with my hand
and demand he to keep driving.
My hands shake.
My voice doesn’t.
This is all I need her to hear.
His saccharine words turn to acid,
smile sliding off his face like an avalanche,
Bitch-cunt you have STIs I wouldn’t touch you with a ten foot pole
before his tires peel away pavement and leave us reeling in dust.
When we return home,
she is still shaking, and I am still furious.
She tells me she was scared she would be hurt,
or I would be hurt,
and I tell her, the same thing my sister told me,
I wouldn’t let that happen.
Later, when she tells her partner what happened,
he says,
“It’s not a big deal. Why are you acting like it is?
”
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