Poles Apart Quotes

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Unending Love I seem to have loved you in numberless forms, numberless times... In life after life, in age after age, forever. My spellbound heart has made and remade the necklace of songs, That you take as a gift, wear round your neck in your many forms, In life after life, in age after age, forever. Whenever I hear old chronicles of love, it's age old pain, It's ancient tale of being apart or together. As I stare on and on into the past, in the end you emerge, Clad in the light of a pole-star, piercing the darkness of time. You become an image of what is remembered forever. You and I have floated here on the stream that brings from the fount. At the heart of time, love of one for another. We have played along side millions of lovers, Shared in the same shy sweetness of meeting, the distressful tears of farewell, Old love but in shapes that renew and renew forever. Today it is heaped at your feet, it has found its end in you The love of all man's days both past and forever: Universal joy, universal sorrow, universal life. The memories of all loves merging with this one love of ours - And the songs of every poet past and forever.
Rabindranath Tagore (Selected Poems)
The conservatives who say, "Let us not move so fast," and the extremists who say, "Let us go out and whip the world ," would tell you that they are as far apart as the poles. But there is a striking parallel: They accomplish nothing; for they do not reach the people who have a crying need to be free.
Martin Luther King Jr. (Why We Can't Wait)
Philosophically, Communism and Anarchism are poles apart. Practically—i.e. in the form of society aimed at—the difference is mainly one of emphasis, but it is quite irreconcilable. The Communist’s emphasis is always on centralism and efficiency, the Anarchist’s on liberty and equality.
George Orwell (Homage to Catalonia)
Love is close to hate when it comes to sisters. You're as close as two humans can be. You came from the same womb. The same background. Even if you're poles apart, mentally. That's why it hurts so much when your sister is unkind. It's as though part of you is turning against yourself.
Jane Corry
Or maybe a person is just made up of a lot of people,” I say. “Maybe we’re accumulating these new selves all the time.” Hauling them in as we make choices, good and bad, as we screw up, step up, lose our minds, find our minds, fall apart, fall in love, as we grieve, grow, retreat from the world, dive into the world, as we make things, as we break things. He grins. “Each new self standing on the last one’s shoulders until we’re these wobbly people poles?” I die of delight. “Yes, exactly! We’re all just wobbly people poles!
Jandy Nelson (I'll Give You the Sun: Jandy Nelson)
Now, as far as I was concerned, there are two ways of living, and because we're on a ball in space these were more or less exactly poles apart. The first, accept the world as it is. The world is concrete and considerable, with beauties and flaws both, and both immense, profound and perplexing, and if you can take it as it is and for what it is you'll all but guarantee an easier path, because it's a given that acceptance is one of the keys to any kind of contentment. The second, that acceptance is surrender, that there's a place for it, but that place is somewhere just before your last breath where you say "All right then, I have tried" and accept that you have lived and loved as best you could, have pushed against every wall, stood up after every disappointment, and until that last moment, you shouldn't accept anything, you should make things better.
Niall Williams (This Is Happiness)
And it’s suddenly, blindingly obvious. He’s too gloriously good-looking. We are poles apart and from two very different worlds. I have a vision of myself as Icarus flying too close to the sun and crashing and burning as a result. ~Anastasia
E.L. James (Fifty Shades of Grey (Fifty Shades, #1))
Increasingly, life seems fractured, as if his past had been lived by someone else. It isn't just that the place he now resides in and the people around him are poles apart, it's like he himself is an entirely different person. The overriding obsessions and foibles of the man he'd once been now feel utterly ludicrous to the current resident of his mind and body. The only bridge is rage; when angered he can taste his old self. But in California, the way he is currently living his life, few things can vex him to that extent. But that's over there.
Irvine Welsh (The Blade Artist (Mark Renton, #4))
Well,' he said, 'I don't know. What's the use of my generalizing? I only know my own case. I like women, but I don't desire them. I like talking to them; but talking to them, though it makes me intimate in one direction, sets me poles apart from them as far as kissing is concerned. So there you are! But don't take me as a general example, probably I'm just a special case: one of the men who like women, but don't love women, and even hate them if they force me into a pretence of love, or an entangled appearance.
D.H. Lawrence (Lady Chatterley's Lover)
He Liked Pizzas, she Burger. He Liked Italian, she Continental. He Liked muffins, she puffs. Poles apart they had no chance, but cheese kept them together.
Nishant Kumar
Enlightenment and Orgasm are both personal affairs. Yet, both are treated poles apart by man
Soman Gouda (YOGI IN SUITS: Christopher Nolan and Vedanta)
It was clear to me that both were intelligent, kind people, but careless with each other’s feelings, and poles apart in temperament. I liked both immensely; I hated their way together.
Esi Edugyan (Washington Black)
Can such a man, you ask, be a leader of the masses? Surprisingly, the answer is yes. The masses — by which I mean not the proletariat, but the anonymous collective body into which all of us, high and low, amalgamate at certain moments — react most strongly to someone who least resembles them. Normality coupled with talent may make a politician popular. But to provoke extremes of love and hate, to be worshipped like a god or loathed like the devil, is given only to a truly exceptional person who is poles apart from the masses, be it far above or far below them. If my experience of Germany has taught me anything, it is this: Rathenau and Hitler are the two men who excited the imagination of the German masses to the utmost; the one by his ineffable culture, the other by his ineffable vileness. Both, and this is decisive, came from inaccessible regions, from some sort of “beyond.” The one from a sphere of sublime spirituality where the cultures of three millennia and two continents hold a symposium; the other from a jungle far below the depths plumbed by the basest penny dreadfuls, from an underworld where demons rise from a brewed-up stench of petty-bourgeois back rooms, doss-houses, barrack latrines, and the hangman’s yard. From their different “beyonds” they both drew
Sebastian Haffner (Defying Hitler: A Memoir)
When she had packed all the artifacts that made up their personal history into liquor store boxes, the house became strictly a feminine place. She stood with her hands on her hips, stoically accepting the absence of old Boston Celtics coasters and the tangle of fishing poles, the old dartboard from a Scots pub, the toolbox and downhill skis, the silky patterned ties which sat in the base of one box like a writing mass of snakes. Without these things, one tended to notice the bright eyelet curtains, the vase filled with yawning crocuses, a needlepoint pillow ... Overall, the house looked much like her apartment had eight years ago, before she had met him.
Jodi Picoult (Mercy)
Everything about them is blighted, dead. Feelings flake off & fall in dust. The senses, vitrified, can no longer experience pleasure; they crack at the least provocation. Each of us, within, was as if devoured by conflagration, & our hearts were no more than a pinch of ashes. Our souls were laid waste. For a long time now we had believed in nothing, not even nothingness. The nihilists of 1880 were a sect of mystics, dreamers, the routineers of universal happiness. We, of course, were poles apart from these credulous fools & their vaporous theories. We were men of action, technicians, specialists, the pioneers of a modern generation dedicated to death, the preachers of world revolution, the precursors of universal destruction, realists, realists. And there is no reality. What then? Destroy to rebuild or destroy to destroy? Neither the one nor the other. Angels or devils? No. You must excuse my smile: we were automats, pure & simple. We ran on like an idling machine until we were exhausted, pointlessly pointlessly, like life, like death, like a dream. Not even adversity had any charm for us.
Blaise Cendrars (Moravagine)
Now the poles have gotten so far apart that anyone who isn’t officiating a gay wedding at a Whole Foods is considered to be to the right of Rush Limbaugh.
Adam Carolla (President Me: The America That's in My Head)
MD’s letter finally reached the village. But no one opened it. Winds glibly carried it away in casual chase and whispers of ghastly horror through the bamboo bush. The house of the Monsoon rain and the pretty pink knitting was now deserted; front yard had fallen decrepit as though struck with the dark fever of pestilence. Branches from storm lay randomly across the yard as did poles and the shack roof. Doors hung from their hinges, in the process of coming completely apart. Ravens came and sat fruitlessly in the yard in search of salted fish.
Mehreen Ahmed (Moirae)
The managers and superintendents and clerks of Packingtown were all recruited from another class, and never from the workers; they scorned the workers, the very meanest of them. A poor devil of a bookkeeper who had been working in Durham's for twenty years at a salary of six dollars a week, and might work there for twenty more and do no better, would yet consider himself a gentleman, as far removed as the poles from the most skilled worker on the killing beds; he would dress differently, and live in another part of the town, and come to work at a different hour of the day, and in every way make sure that he never rubbed elbows with a laboring man. Perhaps this was due to the repulsiveness of the work; at any rate, the people who worked with their hands were a class apart, and were made to feel it.
Upton Sinclair (The Jungle)
In short they felt that they should like to have the pleasure of looking at Lady Pole again, and so they told Sir Walter - rather than asked him - that he missed his wife. He replied that he did not. But this was not allowed to be possible; it was well known that newly married gentlemen were never happy apart from their wives; the briefest of absences could depress a new husband's spirits and interfere with his digestion.
Susanna Clarke (Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell)
The depths of winter longing are ice within my heart The shards of broken covenants lie sharp against my soul The wraiths of long-lost ecstasy still keep us two apart The amen winds of bitterness sill keen from turn to pole. The scares are twisted tendons, the stumps of struck-off limbs, The aching pit of hunger and throb of unset bone, My sanded burning eyeballs, as might within them dims, Add nothin to the torment of lying here alone... The shimmering flames of fever trace out your blessed face My broken eardrums echo yet your voice inside my head I do not fear the darkness that comes to me apace I only dread the loss of you thy comes when I am dead.
Robert A. Heinlein (Stranger in a Strange Land)
Being a feminist in principle is easy compared to being a feminist in practice. For men and women, living each day in practical defiance of thousands of years of gender-based streaming is so much harder than walking in marches, running workshops, and writing blog posts. It means questioning everything you do, moment by moment, day by day. It means thinking differently and making dozens of conscious decisions every day that you might have made on auto-pilot before. It's hard. It's taxing. It's tiring.
Terry Fallis (Poles Apart)
I truly believed that a man should not be seen to be out front on feminism. That would be just like a man to try to take over the women's movement. We'd taken over everything else in history, in society, in the world, why not feminism, too? No, I don't think so.
Terry Fallis (Poles Apart)
We are not a bit alike, you know," she said, "our characters are poles apart. I show everything on my face, whether I like people or not, whether I am angry or pleased. There's no reserve about me. Maxim is entirely different. Very quiet, very reserved. You never know what's going on in that funny mind of his. I lose my temper on the slightest provocation, flare up, and then it's all over. Maxim loses his temper once or twice in a year, and when he does--my God--he *does* lose it. I don't suppose he ever will with you. I should think you are a placid little thing.
Daphne du Maurier (Rebecca)
Do not laugh! But once upon a time (my crest has long since fallen) I had a mind to make a body of more or less connected legend, ranging from the large and cosmogonic, to the level of romantic fairy-story – the larger founded on the lesser in contact with the earth, the lesser drawing splendour from the vast backcloths – which I could dedicate simply to: to England; to my country. It should possess the tone and quality that I desired, somewhat cool and clear, be redolent of our ‘air’ (the clime and soil of the North West, meaning Britain and the hither parts of Europe: not Italy or the Aegean, still less the East), and, while possessing (if I could achieve it) the fair elusive beauty that some call Celtic (though it is rarely found in genuine ancient Celtic things), it should be ‘high’, purged of the gross, and fit for the more adult mind of a land long now steeped in poetry. I would draw some of the great tales in fullness, and leave many only placed in the scheme, and sketched. The cycles should be linked to a majestic whole, and yet leave scope for other minds and hands, wielding paint and music and drama. Absurd. Of course, such an overweening purpose did not develop all at once. The mere stories were the thing. They arose in my mind as ‘given’ things, and as they came, separately, so too the links grew. An absorbing, though continually interrupted labour (especially since, even apart from the necessities of life, the mind would wing to the other pole and spend itself on the linguistics): yet always I had the sense of recording what was already ‘there’, somewhere: not of ‘inventing’. Of course, I made up and even wrote lots of other things (especially for my children). Some escaped from the grasp of this branching acquisitive theme, being ultimately and radically unrelated: Leaf by Niggle and Farmer Giles, for instance, the only two that have been printed. The Hobbit, which has much more essential life in it, was quite independently conceived: I did not know as I began it that it belonged. But it proved to be the discovery of the completion of the whole, its mode of descent to earth, and merging into ‘history’. As the high Legends of the beginning are supposed to look at things through Elvish minds, so the middle tale of the Hobbit takes a virtually human point of view – and the last tale blends them.
J.R.R. Tolkien (The Letters of J.R.R. Tolkien)
Earth processes that seem trivially slow in human time can accomplish stunning work in geologic time. Let the Colorado River erode its bed by 1/100th of an inch each year (about the thickness of one of your fingernails.) Multiply it by six million years, and you’ve carved the Grand Canyon. Take the creeping pace of which the continents move (about two inches per year on average, or roughly as fast as your fingernails grow). Stretch that over thirty million years, and a continent will travel nearly 1,000 miles. Stretch that over a few billions years, and continents will have time to wander from the tropics to the poles and back, crunching together to assemble super-continents, break apart into new configurations- and do all of that again several times over. Deep time, it could be said, is Nature’s way of giving the Earth room for its history. The recognition of deep time might be geology’s paramount contribution to human knowledge.
Keith Meldahl (Rough-Hewn Land: A Geologic Journey from California to the Rocky Mountains)
He had lived in an apartment with books touching the ceilings, and rugs thick enough to hide dice; then in a room and a half with dirt floors; on forest floors, under unconcerned stars; under the floorboards of a Christian who, half a world and three-quarters of a century away, would have a tree planted to commemorate his righteousness; in a hole for so many days his knees would never wholly unbend; among Gypsies and partisans and half-decent Poles; in transit, refugee, and displaced persons camps; on a boat with a bottle with a boat that an insomniac agnostic had miraculously constructed inside it; on the other side of an ocean he would never wholly cross; above half a dozen grocery stores he killed himself fixing up and selling for small profits; beside a woman who rechecked the locks until she broke them, and died of old age at forty-two without a syllable of praise in her throat but the cells of her murdered mother still dividing in her brain; and finally, for the last quarter century, in a snow-globe-quiet Silver Spring split-level: ten pounds of Roman Vishniac bleaching on the coffee table; Enemies, A Love Story demagnetizing in the world’s last functional VCR; egg salad becoming bird flu in a refrigerator mummified with photographs of gorgeous, genius, tumorless great-grandchildren.
Jonathan Safran Foer (Here I Am)
The facade of the robatayaki looked like a leftover from the past…smoky-black tiles topped its wooden overhang…red, waxy paper lanterns lit it up…a noren curtain hung from a thin bamboo pole above the doorframe. Its sliding doors had rows of rectangular panes of glass. The robatayaki’s simplicity gave the impression of a one-story building, but eight floors of apartments rose up from it.
B. Jeanne Shibahara (Kaerou Time to Go Home)
They had no relish for gossiping about their acquaintance and even politics seemed a little dull. In short they felt that they should like to have the pleasure of looking at Lady Pole again, and so they told Sir Walter – rather than asked him – that he missed his wife. He replied that he did not. But this was not allowed to be possible; it was well known that newly married gentlemen were never happy apart from their wives; the briefest of absences could depress a new husband's spirits and interfere with his digestion. Sir Walter's guests asked each other if they thought he looked bilious and they agreed that he did. He denied it. Ah, he was putting a brave face on it, was he? Very good. But clearly it was a desperate case. They would have mercy on him and go and join the ladies.
Susanna Clarke (Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell)
Suddenly life was good, even glamorous. We were poor but didn’t know it, or maybe we did know, but we didn’t care, because my mother had stopped disappearing into her bedroom. Our apartment building was surrounded by empty lots, which were all that separated us from the ocean. Within a couple of decades, those stretches of undeveloped land – prime coastline real estate –would be built upon, with upscale apartment complexes and million-dollar houses with ocean views. But in 1967, those barren lots were our magnificent private playground. I had a tomboy streak and recruited neighborhood boys onto an ad hoc softball team. Dieter and my mother installed a tetherball pole, which acted as a magnet for kids in the neighborhood. For the first time in years, we were enjoying what felt like a normal, quasi-suburban existence, with us at the center of everything–the popular kids with the endless playground.
Katie Hafner (Mother Daughter Me)
All these processes are helped along by another friend of the earth, dematerialization. Progress in technology allows us to do more with less. An aluminum soda can used to weight three ounces; today it weighs less than half an ounce. Mobile phones don't need miles of telephone poles and wires. The digital revolution, by replacing atoms with bits, is dematerializing the world in front of our eyes. The cubic yards of vinyl that used to be my music collection gave way to cubic inches of compact disks and then to the nothingness of MP3s. The river of newsprint flowing through my apartment has been stanched by an iPad. With a terabyte of storage on my laptop I no longer buy paper by the ten-ream box. And just think of all the plastic, metal, and paper that no longer go into the forty-odd consumer products that can be replaced by a single smartphone, including a telephone, answering machine, phone book, camera, camcorder, tape recorder, radio, alarm clock, calculator, dictionary, Rolodex, calendar, street maps, flashlight, fax, and compass--even a metronome, outdoor thermometer, and spirit level.
Steven Pinker (Enlightenment Now: The Case for Reason, Science, Humanism, and Progress)
Why did I do it?" I finally asked him. "Because you couldn't stand it, because you were choking, that's why. Perfectly understandable." No, it was not understandable. Choking was just a word, a metaphor, a nothing. I myself had found the world crawling under my pillow that very same night. It was not an answer, not an explanation, yet it seemed the only one at hand, and the only word that said everything despite my mistrust of words. Why had I left her? Because I was living someone else's life, not mine. Because I wanted my life back, even if I didn't know what my life was or what I even wanted it to be. Because I wanted to be alone, or not with her, or with someone else, or, better yet, with no one at all. Because I wanted to find something of me in others only to realize that others were never going to be like me and ultimately had to be unclasped. thrown out, exploded, because estrangement is branded on the soul, because love itself was foreign to me, and in its place sat resentment and bile. Why had I even started with her? To be with someone instead of no one? To be like him? Or was I already, had always been like him, but in so different a guise that it was just as easy to think us poles apart? The Arab and the jew, the ill-tempered and the mild-mannered, the irascible and the forbearing, the this and the that! And yet, we came from the same mold, choked in the same way, and in the same way, lashed back, then ran away.
André Aciman (Harvard Square)
At the time of solitude, I went where Narmada was sleeping. She got awake and sat up. She neither got scared nor nervous but she immediately got off the bed. She kept both her hands tied on her chest. I was standing so close to her that my face was near her face. We could sense each other’s breath. I called out her name and could not speak anything else. After a moment, I started - “I love you Narmada…I like to be with you…I want to marry you.” She got nervous and said - “Please, go to your room, why have you come here? It may cause trouble if Jaanki sees us like this.” She was neck down. Her eyes were on the floor. Her heart was beating fast. “Don’t you want to talk to me? Why are you angry with me? Why don’t you trust on my feelings for you?” - I softly asked her. “I guess you don’t like my friendship with Varsha. You and Varsha are poles apart.” - I added. She said - “You please go. It would not be nice if someone sees us like this. I do not want anything from you.” I said - “But I am dying for you and I know you too are made for me.” Her eyes suddenly fell on maid behind the curtains of the door who was trying to listen to our conversation. Narmada said - “You please leave right now, we’ll talk later. Mom is not at home.” I went by on her prescriptive tone. She was fighting for her self-being and the reason was only Varsha. She felt suffocated with my friendship with Varsha. I was glad to hear her words - “WE’LL TALK LATER”. This meant, she gave her consent to my love. She understood my restlessness. -- Excerpts from Romantic Novel "Narmada
Laxman Rao
Now, an important word from our Minister of Defense: Certainly the loudspeaker in each and every apartment in North Korea provides news, announcements, and cultural programming, but it must be reminded that it was by Great Leader Kim Il Sung's decree in 1973 that an anti-raid warning system be installed across this nation, and a properly functioning early-warning network is of supreme importance. The Inuit people are a tribe of isolate savages that live near the North Pole. Their boots are called mukluk. Ask your neighbor later today, what is a mukluk? If he does not know, perhaps there is a malfunction with his loudspeaker, or perhaps it has for some reason become accidentally disconnected. By reporting this, you could be saving his life the next time the Americans sneak-attack our great nation.
Adam Johnson (The Orphan Master's Son)
The method he adopted in building the bridge was as follows. He took a pair of piles a foot and a half thick, slightly pointed at the lower ends and of a length adapted to the varying depth of the river, and fastened them together two feet apart. These he lowered into the river with appropriate tackle, placed them in position at right angles to the bank, and drove them home with pile-drivers, not vertically, as piles are generally fixed, but obliquely, inclined in the direction of the current. Opposite these, forty feet lower down the river, another pair of piles was planted, similarly fixed together, and inclined in the opposite direction to the current. The two pairs were then joined by a beam two feet wide, whose ends fitted exactly into the spaces between the two piles forming each pair. The upper pair was kept at the right distance from the lower pair by means of iron braces, one of which was used to fasten each pile to the end of the beam. The pairs of piles being thus held apart, and each pair individually strengthened by a diagonal tie between the two piles, the whole structure was so rigid, that, in accordance with the laws of physics, the greater the force of the current, the more tightly were the piles held in position. A series of these piles and transverse beams was carried right across the stream and connected by lengths of timber running in the direction of the bridge; on these were laid poles and bundles of sticks. In spite of the strength of the structure, additional piles were fixed obliquely to each pair of the original piles along the whole length of the downstream side of the bridge, holding them up like a buttress and opposing the force of the current. Others were fixed also a little above the bridge, so that if the natives tried to demolish it by floating down tree-trunks or beams, these buffers would break the force of the impact and preserve the bridge from injury.
Gaius Julius Caesar (The Conquest of Gaul)
Are you sure you’re all right?” Oscar asked. “I’m sure.” The sound of their voices disturbed the night, and her dishonesty disturbed her. How could she be all right? She’d been abducted at knifepoint. She’d heard the chanting again and seen the eerie black skeletal face on the bathwater’s surface. What were those things, if not part of the Umandu curse? “Are you sure he didn’t touch you?” Oscar asked, the softness of his question poles apart from the anger and irritation he’d shown all day. It was obvious he didn’t want to go chasing after Umandu, but she couldn’t imagine the prospect of bringing her father back to life would make him so sour. Camille sat up, holding the thin blanket around her neck. An odd thought struck her: They were on land, alone in a room, and they hadn’t yet struggled with an awkward stretch of silence. Camille liked the change and hoped it stuck. Oscar lay on the floor, beneath the double windows. He had one arm over his chest, the other behind his head. He saw her and pushed himself up, his own covers loose around his waist. He still wore his clothes, and she grinned, knowing it was for her benefit only. He’d be sweating rivers tonight in the heavy heat. Oscar wrapped his arm around one knee. “You have no idea what went through my mind tonight when I found that bathtub empty,” he whispered. “I can’t let anything happen to you, Camille.” She sat up a little straighter, hoping he wouldn’t pledge his protection just to honor his dead captain. “I didn’t mean to make you worry, Oscar. But my safety isn’t your burden.” Though she couldn’t see him clearly in the shadowed room, Camille felt his eyes on her. “You’re not a burden, Camille. Not to me.” She searched his dark outline. A patch of moonlight fell on a swath of bare skin on the curve of his neck. It glistened with sweat, and she felt her own skin fire with the charged silence growing between them. She didn’t know how to respond; he wouldn’t look away. “He didn’t touch me,” she whispered instead, answering his original question. She lay back and turned onto her side, disappointed she hadn’t found something more to say. Something to make the moment last a hair longer. Oscar’s covers rustled as he settled back as well. “That was smart of him,” he replied, and said no more.
Angie Frazier (Everlasting (Everlasting, #1))
My dwelling was small, and I could hardly entertain an echo in it; but it seemed larger for being a single apartment and remote from neighbors. All the attractions of a house were concentrated in one room; it was kitchen, chamber, parlor, and keeping-room; and whatever satisfaction parent or child, master or servant, derive from living in a house, I enjoyed it all. Cato says, the master of a family (patremfamilias) must have in his rustic villa "cellam oleariam, vinariam, dolia multa, uti lubeat caritatem expectare, et rei, et virtuti, et gloriae erit," that is, "an oil and wine cellar, many casks, so that it may be pleasant to expect hard times; it will be for his advantage, and virtue, and glory." I had in my cellar a firkin of potatoes, about two quarts of peas with the weevil in them, and on my shelf a little rice, a jug of molasses, and of rye and Indian meal a peck each. I sometimes dream of a larger and more populous house, standing in a golden age, of enduring materials, and without gingerbread work, which shall still consist of only one room, a vast, rude, substantial, primitive hall, without ceiling or plastering, with bare rafters and purlins supporting a sort of lower heaven over one's head—useful to keep off rain and snow, where the king and queen posts stand out to receive your homage, when you have done reverence to the prostrate Saturn of an older dynasty on stepping over the sill; a cavernous house, wherein you must reach up a torch upon a pole to see the roof; where some may live in the fireplace, some in the recess of a window, and some on settles, some at one end of the hall, some at another, and some aloft on rafters with the spiders, if they choose; a house which you have got into when you have opened the outside door, and the ceremony is over; where the weary traveller may wash, and eat, and converse, and sleep, without further journey; such a shelter as you would be glad to reach in a tempestuous night, containing all the essentials of a house, and nothing for house-keeping; where you can see all the treasures of the house at one view, and everything hangs upon its peg, that a man should use; at once kitchen, pantry, parlor, chamber, storehouse, and garret; where you can see so necessary a thing, as a barrel or a ladder, so convenient a thing as a cupboard, and hear the pot boil, and pay your respects to the fire that cooks your dinner, and the oven that bakes your bread, and the necessary furniture and utensils are the chief ornaments; where the washing is not put out, nor the fire, nor the mistress, and perhaps you are sometimes requested to move from off the trap-door, when the cook would descend into the cellar, and so learn whether the ground is solid or hollow beneath you without stamping. A house whose inside is as open and manifest as a bird's nest, and you cannot go in at the front door and out at the back without seeing some of its inhabitants; where to be a guest is to be presented with the freedom of the house, and not to be carefully excluded from seven eighths of it, shut up in a particular cell, and told to make yourself at home there—in solitary confinement. Nowadays the host does not admit you to his hearth, but has got the mason to build one for yourself somewhere in his alley, and hospitality is the art of keeping you at the greatest distance. There is as much secrecy about the cooking as if he had a design to poison you. I am aware that I have been on many a man's premises, and might have been legally ordered off, but I am not aware that I have been in many men's houses. I might visit in my old clothes a king and queen who lived simply in such a house as I have described, if I were going their way; but backing out of a modern palace will be all that I shall desire to learn, if ever I am caught in one.
Henry David Thoreau (Walden)
And it would be startlingly cheap. IV estimates the “Save the Arctic” plan could be set up in just two years at a cost of roughly $20 million, with an annual operating cost of about $10 million. If cooling the poles alone proved insufficient, IV has drawn up a “Save the Planet” version, with five worldwide base stations instead of two, and three hoses at each site. This would put about three to five times the amount of sulfur dioxide into the stratosphere. Even so, that would still represent less than 1 percent of current worldwide sulfur emissions. IV estimates this plan could be up and running in about three years, with a startup cost of $150 million and annual operating costs of $100 million. So Budyko’s Blanket could effectively reverse global warming at a total cost of $250 million. Compared with the $1.2 trillion that Nicholas Stern proposes spending each year to attack the problem, IV’s idea is, well, practically free. It would cost $50 million less to stop global warming than what Al Gore’s foundation is paying just to increase public awareness about global warming. And there lies the key to the question we asked at the beginning of this chapter: What do Al Gore and Mount Pinatubo have in common? The answer is that Gore and Pinatubo both suggest a way to cool the planet, albeit with methods whose cost-effectiveness are a universe apart.
Steven D. Levitt (SuperFreakonomics, Illustrated edition: Global Cooling, Patriotic Prostitutes, and Why Suicide Bombers Should Buy Life Insurance)
First off, demon, let’s get one thing straight. I. Am. Not. Weak. What you saw last night was another fucking subclause of Lucifer’s that makes me of the same strength physically and magically as when I died, but only when on the mortal plane in the presence of the souls I damned. Any other time, I am not to be messed with.” “If you’re so bad ass, how come I never heard of you?” “I prefer to stay out of the spotlight, unlike some sorceress’s I know,” she said with a smile as she came to stop in front of him. “But I do have a nickname.” “Hot on a stick?” “No.” “Spanks with magic?” “Most definitely not.” “I know, you must be the famous BJ Swallows.” “I am going to hurt you.” “I was right?” “No. And your made up names are just pissing me off.” “Made up? I’ll have you know those monikers are just a few of the more famous witch ones I know. Of course, I don’t know if their magical abilities extend beyond the pole they dance on, but still, they’re very well known in my circles.” “Why am I not surprised?” “Are you going to tell what your name is then? ‘Cause I’m gonna wager it isn’t Magical Pie.” He really needed to learn how to keep certain thoughts to himself, an easy thing to promise with the iron grip she had on his balls. Not exactly how he pictured their first time touching. She twisted. He winced. “Let this be a reminder not to fuck with me. And just so you know, while my nickname is the Blood Witch, my true title is Satan’s Assistant.” She was the one who had all the damned souls trembling? Hot damn. “I have heard of you.” “Good, then you know what I can do. And might I add it hurts.” She leaned up on tiptoe as she said it, her lips so close to his. But Ysabel wasn’t the only one with surprises. And truly, she’d pushed the boundaries of temptation too far. He snapped her magic binding and wrapped his arms around her, bringing her flush against his chest. “Did I mention, apart from ability with fire, I can unravel several forms of magic?” Then he kissed her, and by all the coals in the furnace of Hell, he’d never burned hotter.
Eve Langlais (A Demon and His Witch (Welcome to Hell, #1))
Only twice in literary history has there been a great period of tragedy, in the Athens of Pericles and in Elizabethan England. What these two periods had in common, two thousand years and more apart in time, that they expressed themselves in the same fashion, may give us some hint of the nature of tragedy, for far from being periods of darkness and defeat, each was a time when life was seen exalted, a time of thrilling and unfathomable possibilities. They held their heads high, those men who conquered at Marathon and Salamis, and those who fought Spain and saw the Great Armada sink. The world was a place of wonder; mankind was beauteous; life was lived on the crest of the wave. More than all, the poignant joy of heroism had stirred men’s hearts. Not stuff for tragedy, would you say? But on the crest of the wave one must feel either tragically or joyously; one cannot feel tamely. The temper of mind that sees tragedy in life has not for its opposite the temper that sees joy. The opposite pole to the tragic view of life is the sordid view. When humanity is seen as devoid of dignity and significance, trivial, mean, and sunk in dreary hopelessness, then the spirit of tragedy departs. “Sometime let gorgeous tragedy in sceptred pall come sweeping by.” At the opposite pole stands Gorki with The Lower Depths. Other poets may, the tragedian must, seek for the significance of life. An error strangely common is that this significance for tragic purposes depends, in some sort, upon outward circumstance, on pomp and feast and revelry, With mask, and antique pageantry— Nothing of all that touches tragedy. The surface of life is comedy’s concern; tragedy is indifferent to it. We do not, to be sure, go to Main Street or to Zenith for tragedy, but the reason has nothing to do with their dull familiarity. There is no reason inherent in the house itself why Babbitt’s home in Zenith should not be the scene of a tragedy quite as well as the Castle of Elsinore. The only reason it is not is Babbitt himself. “That singular swing toward elevation” which Schopenhauer discerned in tragedy, does not take any of its impetus from outside things. The
Edith Hamilton (The Greek Way)
Palestinian Ziad Rizk, 38, sits with others in a shelter made of a blanket stretched over four poles next to one of the destroyed Nada Towers, where he lost his apartment and clothes shop,
Anonymous
Never Let Me Down" (feat. Jay-Z, J-Ivy) [Intro:] Yeah Grandmama Told you I won't let you down Told you I won't let this rap game change me, right? [Chorus:] When it comes to being true, at least true to me One thing I found,one thing I found Oh no you'll neva let me down, Get up I get(down) Get up I get(down) Get up I get(down) Get up I get(down) Get up I get(down) Get up I get(down) [Jay-Z:] Yo, yo first I snatched the street then I snatched the charts, First had they ear now I hav they're heart, Rappers came and went, I've been hear from the start, Seen them put it together Watch them take it apart, See the Rovers roll up wit ribbons I've seen them re-poed, re-sold and re-driven So when I reload, he holds #1 position When u hot I'm hot And when your feet cold, mines is sizzelin It's plain to see Nigga's can't f*** wit me Cuz ima be that nigga fo life This is not an image This is God given This is hard liven Mixed wit crystal sipping It's the most consistent Hov Give you the most hits you can fit inside a whole disc and Nigga I'm home on these charts, y'all niggaz visitin It's Hov tradition, Jeff Gordan of rap I'm back to claim pole position, holla at ya boy [Chorus] [Kanye West:] I get down for my grandfather who took my momma Made her sit that seat where white folks ain't wanna us to eat At the tender age of 6 she was arrested for the sit in With that in my blood I was born to be different Now niggas can't make it to ballots to choose leadership But we can make it to Jacob and to the dealership That's why I hear new music And I just don't be feeling it Racism still alive they just be concealing it But I know they don't want me in the damn club They even made me show I.D to get inside of Sam's club I did dirt and went to church to get my hands scrubbed Swear I've been baptised at least 3 or 4 times But in the land where nigga's praise Yukons and getting paid It gon' take a lot more than coupons to get us saved Like it take a lot more than do-rags to get your waves Noting sadder than that day my girl father past away So I promised to Mr Rany I'm gonna marry your daughter And u know I gotta thank u for they way that she was brought up And I know that u were smiling when u see that car I bought her And u sent tears from heaven when u seen my car get balled up But I can't complaint what the accident did to my Left Eye Cuz look what a accident did to Left Eye First Aaliyah and now romeo must die I know a got angels watching me from the other side
Kanye West
I will have your things returned to your apartment tomorrow.” It made me sick in my stomach to hear those words. His untimely declarations were worse than….It was that raw, that demeaning, and made you feel like you were nothing but a let down…a total let down. Well, I wasn’t willing to be a let down to anyone…least of all to someone willing to drop me in front of my home tossing my heart into the air…waiting for love to find me in all the wrong places. He wore a look of regret on his face. “Jason will drive your car home for you.” “Oh…okay, well...I had a great time.” It was over. I was a statistic, a hash line on the totem pole of his sexual career. “You and I, we were...it was fun. I had fun.” He leaned in toward me, kissing me gently, regretfully. Are you kidding me?
C.E. Hansen (It's A Crime (Blood and Tears, #1))
Was it this? Unlike as they were in everything upon which human friendship is usually based — unlike in upbringing, in modes of life, in habits, interests, and thoughts, poles apart in station and in appearance, there was yet a bond between them which needed no forging, but sprang suddenly and strongly into being at their first contact.
D.E. Stevenson (Peter West)
Loretta was stuffing her belongings into her satchel when Hunter stepped into the lodge. He stood in the shadows a moment, watching her. The firelight fell across her, shimmering in her golden hair, flickering across the leather that skimmed her bent shoulders. She was sobbing. The sounds cut through him. “Blue Eyes?” His whisper snapped her head around. She sprang to her feet, his eyes huge with shock, her lips pale. “I’m leaving, Hunter.” Hunter stepped from the shadows, his heart catching at the way she retreated. “I was not at your wooden walls that day, Blue Eyes. I have spoken it.” He paused by the fire, not wanting to crowd her. “It is a God promise I make for you.” Sparkling with tears, her eyes met his. Her throat worked, and her mouth twisted. “Oh, Hunter, don’t you see it doesn’t make a difference?” She made a gesture toward his scalp pole. “From the first we knew it could never work between us. Somehow, for a few wonderful days, we lost sight of that. You’re a Comanche. I’m a tosi woman. We’re worlds apart.” “Look into me and say you have no love for me,” he commanded hoarsely. “All the love in the world can never change this.” “Say the words to me!” “I can’t. I do love you, don’t you see? What I must do has nothing to do with what’s between us.” “My heart sang only good things--” His voice caught, and he swallowed. “I thought the comb would bring you great gladness.” “I know that.” Loretta swiped at her cheeks and sniffed. “I’m not blaming you. It’s not your fault, Hunter, or mine, not even Red Buffalo’s. Don’t you see? This madness began long before we were born, and it’ll go on long after we’re all dead. Some things, no matter how sweet, how wonderful, just aren’t meant to be.
Catherine Anderson (Comanche Moon (Comanche, #1))
If today’s youth have less reason to believe things will improve for them under the democratic status quo, they have less reason to uphold those institutions.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
In short, in uncertain times they craved the certainty of the ingroup, shunned the outgroup and, as they did so, locked themselves into a polarised mindset.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
because one of the great mistakes many political analysts historically made was to assume, as the political scientist Anthony Downs did in his 1957 article ‘An Economic Theory of Political Action in a Democracy’, that ‘the citizens of our model democracy are rational’.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Yet despite such voter engagement, analysis shows that voter advice apps have had no effect on their users’ ultimate voting decision.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
in those countries where the average income is over $6,000 per annum, democracy can survive ‘come hell or high water’, but that where the average per capita income is below $1,000, the life expectancy of a democracy is a mere eight years.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Ironically, as the economist Raj Chetty has shown, these days you are twice as likely to achieve the American Dream if you live in Canada than if you are a US citizen.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Were participants aware of the influence their political group identity had on their judgements? No. All were convinced they had made rational assessments based purely on the evidence placed in front of them. They did, however, believe that others, including their allies but especially those of different ideological persuasians, would be swayed in such a way.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
This worrying tendency to become convinced that the same set of ‘facts’ prove us to be right and our rivals to be wrong is a major driving force in polarisation.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
If, for example, people in group A believe that members of group B are ‘stealing’ their jobs, they will feel resentment and hostility even if what they think to be true is not objectively the case.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Anything that causes people to fear losing what they already have offers the potential for conflict.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
we often don’t treat individuals as individuals. We treat them as members of a group. And in so doing, we bring a freight of preconceptions and prejudices to our judgements.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
it does generally seem to be the case that contact-based approaches can only have a limited effect when it comes to reducing polarisation, not least because the people who become involved are not drawn from society as a whole but from those who chose to ‘opt in’.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Quintin Oliver, a conflict resolution specialist and the man behind the successful referendum for a ‘Yes’ vote on the Good Friday Agreement in Northern Ireland, told us that for deliberative democracy to work, three essential ingredients first have to be in place: a purpose; a promise; and a deadline.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
With a relevant and tangible ‘superordinate’ goal in play, the animosity previously expressed by the two groups quickly began to dissipate.28 The insults dwindled. Aggression vanished. Cross-group friendships began to form. Pursuing a common goal highlighted what the boys had in common and averted focus from what was different.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Manchester United fans were asked to talk not about their team but about what they liked about being a football supporter. When the fans primed in this way were then confronted by the fallen jogger, the help they offered was determined not by whether the jogger was a Manchester United supporter but by whether he was a football fan.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Jordan Blashek and Chris Haugh found that a good way to reduce tension was to ‘strip away the labels’. ‘We learned to identify each other not as Democrats or Republicans with beliefs motivated by partisan ideology, but instead as the deeper identities that we both carried that matter to us,’ said Jordan.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Lab studies33 have shown that when people are asked to reflect on their own positive attributes – for example, by writing them down – they react more open-mindedly to information that goes against their partisan identity.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
if we first think about our own positive attributes (attributes not connected with our group), the boost we receive in self-esteem neutralises the negativity we would usually experience from a dalliance with ‘them’. Self-affirmation, it seems, gives people the inner security they need to accept new ideas that they would otherwise reject, and to abandon old ideas to which they would otherwise cling.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
If people are told that their views are outdated, they may double down. Messages that seek to include rather than reprimand them will be more effective.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
there are common themes to many accounts of their journeys and those highlighted by academic studies: rethinking and/or getting to know the ‘enemy’ (in other words, who the ‘them’ is); seeking to establish a shared identity; moving from a winning to an understanding mindset; being presented with a route to change that made it less costly; rethinking a position in the face of kindness; identifying a common goal rather than a ‘winning’ position; listening to a trusted ‘messenger’; letting go of a belief if a mechanistic attempt to justify it failed or if presented with overwhelming contrary evidence.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Leah and Craig were able to activate their other identities – as parents, as people who valued education, as people who cared about sharing the reality of the situation with a wider group of people – which meant they could treat each other with kindness, explore each other’s views in more depth and, in the process, move from a winning position to an understanding one in which they could establish a shared goal.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
You have to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. And I think the key takeaway there is that if we continue to only speak to people who agree with us, we won’t make change. We won’t change people’s minds. So the first step is being comfortable with being uncomfortable: being willing to speak to people who don’t agree with you. The second is that we have to recognise that the people that we’re speaking to, that maybe we see as enemies or as adversaries, quite often have a lot more in common with us than we care to realise
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
then [it’s about] finding the places where you have common ground and building from there, finding the things that benefit both of you, both of your values, where you both can start from, where you’re similar rather than you’re different.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
to negotiate you need to see the process as collaborative problem-solving rather than winner-takes-all.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Debate is good. Disagreement is good. Entrenching in our own beliefs to the extent that we can’t tolerate either does us much harm.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
We reserve special thanks for our husbands. Will, Doug and Jimmy; and our children Evie, Teddy, Tomos, Anna and Ellie. Mummy can finally put down the laptop!
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Our appetite for story is a reflection of the profound human need to grasp the patterns of living.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
And herein lies one of the great powers and potential dangers of stories. That emotional bonding force they create, in generating a sense of togetherness, can by the same token also generate an outgroup.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
But a close study of the Obama camp’s TV advertising has revealed that it actually spent more on advertising that promoted a negative message than did those promoting Obama’s opponent John McCain via a similarly negative message.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Studies have shown that in situations where laughter is evoked, levels of trust and generosity increase by 30 per cent.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Why, then, should a story as absurd as Pizzagate prove so ‘sticky’? Quite simply, it ticked all the conspiracy theory boxes, and in so doing ticked many of the boxes for a great story. It evoked strong emotion through a narrative of supposedly suffering children. It posited a world clearly divided between good and evil. And in triggering fear in an environment dominated by social and political uncertainty it played on people’s natural tendency to pay more attention to negative coverage in the media when faced with news that induces anxiety, whether a terrorist attack, a natural disaster, a financial crash – or an evil conspiracy.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
research from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology that points to fake news being retweeted 70 per cent more frequently than the truth,32 and to the truth taking nearly six times as long as a falsehood to reach 1,500 people and twenty times as long to be passed on through a chain of ten recipients.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
This remained the case even when these particular voters were challenged, and even when they were shown a newspaper article in which G. W. Bush himself was quoted as saying there was no link between Saddam and 9/11. Whatever contrary evidence was presented to them, from whatever source, 98 per cent of those interviewed refused to change their minds. Their beliefs, their views and their partisan identity had become inextricably interwoven.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
A study conducted in 2018 by a group of academics led by the Duke sociologist Christopher Bail69 involved paying supporters of the Democratic and Republican parties in the US a small sum each to follow bots that retweeted messages put out by elected officials and opinion leaders with opposing political views. Over the course of a month, researchers found that the two groups became, respectively, more liberal and more conservative (the shift was particularly apparent among Republican supporters).
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
For humans who are hardwired to find ways to reduce uncertainty,58 living in a world that is increasingly uncertain is fraught with dangers.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
A predisposition to reduce threat drives us to want to keep the world the way it is.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
When people are worried or frightened, the wrong answer is better than no answer. Ignorant confidence is better received than informed uncertainty. Leaders who are trying to do the right thing can fall by the wayside. Leaders who say that they are doing the right thing are popular.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Strong leaders, suggests the Oxford historian and political scientist Archie Brown, are the least likely to reach across divides, seek consensus and deliver a transformative, depolarising reset.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Because we can’t change reality when things we dislike or that cause us harm come to pass, we instead change our minds about them, persuading ourselves that they’re not really that bad.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Having randomly assigned accurate and inaccurate information about immigration policy and levels of immigration to participants in their study, they found that the provision of accurate facts and figures did have an impact on people’s knowledge. But that new knowledge had no knock-on effect on attitudes, even among those who discovered that their previous assumptions were wildly out of kilter with reality.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
opinions come first, and facts are interpreted to support them. This points to a wider truth touched on in Chapter 1, that many of our attitudes are rooted in predispositions established early in life and reinforced by the groups we interact with, and that, consequently, mere information is often insufficient to shift the dial.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
One approach which has been shown to work is to say, not that something isn’t true, but that its opposite is true.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Humans suffer from what is technically known as the illusion of explanatory depth (IOED).27 In other words, we tend to believe that we understand things far more precisely and coherently than we actually do.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Researchers have found that when people are brought face-to-face with the fact that they don’t know as much as they thought they did in a mechanistic (step-by-step fashion), they tend to become less extreme.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Before you commit yourself to a position or a policy, ask yourself to explain mechanistically how you think it will bring about its intended outcome. Pick a topic you feel strongly about: climate change, immigration, taxation, gun laws, euthanasia. Then don’t simply justify it: write down or explain to someone else step-by-step how your thinking operates and why therefore it will succeed.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
it turned out that in one particular US training camp they had been taught that Koreans were ‘cruel and heartless’ and trained to hate them deeply. So when they were shown unexpected kindness and compassion36 by their Korean captors, which flew in the face of the barbarism they had been trained to expect, their prior beliefs crumbled.37 In fact, soldiers who had been trained in this particular US camp were far more likely to defect than POWs who had not been given any training on the North Koreans or had been given more neutral information.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
The point is, though, that he did all this kindly, not critically or censoriously. Famke acknowledged that ‘she just needed that’: it was his kindness, it seems, that made the difference
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Kindness involves a mindset of understanding, not winning. A zero-sum, winner-takes-all mentality makes both sides think that if the other side wins, they lose. An understanding mentality ensures that because neither side loses, neither side puts winning beyond everything else.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
So instead, we started having conversations where we entered with the intention just to learn from the other side. And we found that in doing so, it made our own positions better, and our own views stronger, more reasoned and nuanced. Second, we realised that a lot of our assumptions about the other side turned out to be wrong.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
rather than thinking about negotiation as a battle, you should think about negotiation as collaborative problem-solving.’46 She argues that it is critical that you start by being prepared – and able – to frame your proposals as a solution to a problem your counterpart has.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
One final way to counter polarisation is to formulate a markedly different position from our usual one and come up with reasons for it. Can we understand why someone would hold such a view? It may be different from ours, but is it genuinely worse – or perhaps better
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
When disagreement comes from a socially different person, we are prompted to work harder. Diversity jolts us into cognitive action in ways that homogeneity simply does not.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
In recent times, organisational diversity has tended to focus on the crucial issues of race and gender. But there’s a case to be made for ensuring a plurality of political views too, not least as, at a fundamental level, these encompass how we share resources across different groups
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
enabling debate and division that boosts rather than undermines innovation, creativity and productivity – is critical, but so too is emphasising what holds us together.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
The conclusion of the American political philosopher John Rawls was that we need clearly defined ways to debate with one another, while protecting our political institutions, if we are each to remain free. We must find a way to disagree that does not ultimately undermine us all.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)
Abraham Lincoln is supposed to have said, ‘I don’t like that man. I must get to know him better.
Alison Goldsworthy (Poles Apart: Why People Turn Against Each Other, and How to Bring Them Together)