Overrated Quotes

We've searched our database for all the quotes and captions related to Overrated. Here they are! All 100 of them:

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You know, when it works, love is pretty amazing. It's not overrated. There's a reason for all those songs.
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Sarah Dessen (This Lullaby)
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Perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring." I smile. "You don't think I'm perfect?" "No. You're delightfully screwy, and I wouldn't have you any other way.
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Stephanie Perkins (Lola and the Boy Next Door (Anna and the French Kiss, #2))
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Going outside is highly overrated.
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Ernest Cline (Ready Player One (Ready Player One, #1))
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You picked a lemon, throw it away lemonade is overrated. Freaks should remain at the circus, not in your apartment. You already have one asshole. You don’t need another. Make a space in your life for the glorious things you deserve. Have faith.
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Greg Behrendt (He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys)
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I can believe things that are true and things that aren't true and I can believe things where nobody knows if they're true or not. I can believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny and the Beatles and Marilyn Monroe and Elvis and Mister Ed. Listen - I believe that people are perfectable, that knowledge is infinite, that the world is run by secret banking cartels and is visited by aliens on a regular basis, nice ones that look like wrinkled lemurs and bad ones who mutilate cattle and want our water and our women. I believe that the future sucks and I believe that the future rocks and I believe that one day White Buffalo Woman is going to come back and kick everyone's ass. I believe that all men are just overgrown boys with deep problems communicating and that the decline in good sex in America is coincident with the decline in drive-in movie theaters from state to state. I believe that all politicians are unprincipled crooks and I still believe that they are better than the alternative. I believe that California is going to sink into the sea when the big one comes, while Florida is going to dissolve into madness and alligators and toxic waste. I believe that antibacterial soap is destroying our resistance to dirt and disease so that one day we'll all be wiped out by the common cold like martians in War of the Worlds. I believe that the greatest poets of the last century were Edith Sitwell and Don Marquis, that jade is dried dragon sperm, and that thousands of years ago in a former life I was a one-armed Siberian shaman. I believe that mankind's destiny lies in the stars. I believe that candy really did taste better when I was a kid, that it's aerodynamically impossible for a bumble bee to fly, that light is a wave and a particle, that there's a cat in a box somewhere who's alive and dead at the same time (although if they don't ever open the box to feed it it'll eventually just be two different kinds of dead), and that there are stars in the universe billions of years older than the universe itself. I believe in a personal god who cares about me and worries and oversees everything I do. I believe in an impersonal god who set the universe in motion and went off to hang with her girlfriends and doesn't even know that I'm alive. I believe in an empty and godless universe of causal chaos, background noise, and sheer blind luck. I believe that anyone who says sex is overrated just hasn't done it properly. I believe that anyone who claims to know what's going on will lie about the little things too. I believe in absolute honesty and sensible social lies. I believe in a woman's right to choose, a baby's right to live, that while all human life is sacred there's nothing wrong with the death penalty if you can trust the legal system implicitly, and that no one but a moron would ever trust the legal system. I believe that life is a game, that life is a cruel joke, and that life is what happens when you're alive and that you might as well lie back and enjoy it.
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Neil Gaiman (American Gods (American Gods, #1))
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To say I’m an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair.
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Tina Fey (Bossypants)
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Comfort zones are overrated. They make you lazy.
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Melina Marchetta (Saving Francesca)
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Dying is overrated. Human sentimentality has twisted it into the ultimate act of love. Biggest load of bullshit in the world. Dying for someone isn't the hard thing. The man that dies escapes. Plain and simple. Game over. End of pain...Try living for someone. Through it all-good, bad, thick, thin, joy, suffering. That's the hard thing.
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Karen Marie Moning (Shadowfever (Fever, #5))
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I think reality is overrated.
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David Nicholls (One Day)
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You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.
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Woody Allen
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You overrate my capacity of love. I don't posess half the warmth of nature you believe me to have. An unprotected childhood in a cold world has beaten gentleness out of me.
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Thomas Hardy (Far From the Madding Crowd)
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Civilization is vastly overrated.
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Patricia Briggs (On the Prowl (Alpha & Omega, #0.5))
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You know, when it works, love is amazing. It's not overrated.
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Sarah Dessen (This Lullaby)
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The cat wrinkled its nose and managed to look unimpressed. "Calling cats," it confided, "tends to be a rather overrated activity. Might as well call a whirlwind.
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Neil Gaiman (Coraline)
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If this was love, love had been overrated.
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Henry James (The Europeans (Penguin Popular Classics))
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Maturity is highly overrated.
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Kelley Armstrong (Bitten (Otherworld, #1))
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Approval is overrated...Approval and disapproval alike satisfy those who deliver it more than those who receive it. I don't care for approval, and I don't mind doing without.
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Gregory Maguire
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It will never be perfect, but perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring on live TV.
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Tina Fey (Bossypants)
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Sand is overrated. It's just tiny little rocks.
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Charlie Kaufman (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind: The Shooting Script)
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Everyone wants to grow up to be a faerie princess. Trust me, It's overrated
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Laurell K. Hamilton (A Kiss of Shadows (Merry Gentry, #1))
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Goodbyes are overrated.
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Neil Gaiman (American Gods (American Gods, #1))
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I think fitting in is highly overrated. I’d rather just fit out... Fitting out means being who you are, even when people insist that you have to change. Fitting out means taking up space, not apologizing for yourself, and not agreeing with those who seek to label you with stereotypes.
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Golda Poretsky
β€œ
It's hot rain and humid days and broken thermostats. It's screaming and raging steam engines and wanting to take your clothes off just to feel a breeze. It's the kind of kiss that makes you realize oxygen is overrated.
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Tahereh Mafi (Unravel Me (Shatter Me, #2))
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As many overrate the allowable bearing capacity of their love commitment, they may also misjudge the consequences of the steps they take. Measuring is knowing, indeed. (β€œMeasuring space Β»)
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Erik Pevernagie
β€œ
I love you more than I can say, than I can even think and what you give me takes my breath away, but breathing is overrated when I can kiss you.
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Aleksandr Voinov (Special Forces - Mercenaries Part I (Special Forces, #2 part 1))
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Go to hell," he said, but there was a desolate fear in his eyes and I couldn't look away. "Been there. Trust me. It's so overrated.
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Melina Marchetta (On the Jellicoe Road)
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For my part,” I replied, β€œI find forgiveness overrated. There are times and places when it’s appropriate. But not when the demand that you forgive is used to keep you in your place.
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Ann Leckie (Ancillary Sword (Imperial Radch, #2))
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Being a martyr is highly overrated.
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Patricia Briggs (Dragon Bones (Hurog, #1))
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Your least favorite virtue, or nominee for the most overrated one? Faith. Closely followedβ€”in view of the overall shortage of timeβ€”by patience.
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Christopher Hitchens (Hitch 22: A Memoir)
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Okay," I gasp. "I can't really breathe, but other than that, okay." "Breathing's overrated," Gabriel advises me."I'm discovering that right about now with this damn tie.
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Carolyn MacCullough (Once a Witch (Witch, #1))
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I don’t mean to make a big deal out of sobriety, by the way. Of all the modes of human consciousness available to the modern consumer I consider it to be the most overrated.
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Michael Chabon (Wonder Boys)
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Common is overrated.
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Ally Carter (Only the Good Spy Young (Gallagher Girls, #4))
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Approval is overrated. Approval and disapproval alike satisfy those who deliver it more than those who receive it.
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Gregory Maguire (Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister)
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It's all overrated, man. Sex is only a great thing if you're not getting any.
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Charles Bukowski
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I've been in love. It's painful, pointless and overrated. - Damon Salvatore
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L.J. Smith
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Normal's overrated.
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Lisa Genova (Left Neglected)
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Imperfection is underrated. Perfection is overrated.
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Helena Bonham Carter
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Protection and power are overrated. I think you are very wise to choose happiness and love.
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Uncle Iroh
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Having a spine is overrated. If everybody squealed and ran away, there'd be no more wars.
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Robert Anton Wilson
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The four most over-rated things in life are champagne, lobster, anal sex, and picnics.
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Christopher Hitchens
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Faith is the surrender of the mind, it's the surrender of reason, it's the surrender of the only thing that makes us different from other animals. It's our need to believe and to surrender our skepticism and our reason, our yearning to discard that and put all our trust or faith in someone or something, that is the sinister thing to me. ... Out of all the virtues, all the supposed virtues, faith must be the most overrated
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Christopher Hitchens
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He said something I remember very clearly. "Self esteem is overrated. Anyone will think they color great if enough people tell them. Artificial praise. Down inside, compliments like that are hollow.
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Albert Borris (Crash Into Me)
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Humanity is overrated
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Adrian Tchaikovsky (Children of Time (Children of Time, #1))
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Many girls have been romanced under the moon, and I don’t mean to say moonlight is overrated, but few I think have known the magic of a sunrise kiss.
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Jerry Spinelli (Love, Stargirl (Stargirl, #2))
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Q: I want to be an author when I grow up. Am I insane?" Neil Gaiman: "Yes. Growing up is highly overrated. Just be an author." [Jumbo.com, 21 August 2012]
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Neil Gaiman
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The great source of both the misery and disorders of human life, seems to arise from over-rating the difference between one permanent situation and another. Avarice over-rates the difference between poverty and riches: ambition, that between a private and a public station: vain-glory, that between obscurity and extensive reputation. The person under the influence of any of those extravagant passions, is not only miserable in his actual situation, but is often disposed to disturb the peace of society, in order to arrive at that which he so foolishly admires. The slightest observation, however, might satisfy him, that, in all the ordinary situations of human life, a well-disposed mind may be equally calm, equally cheerful, and equally contented. Some of those situations may, no doubt, deserve to be preferred to others: but none of them can deserve to be pursued with that passionate ardour which drives us to violate the rules either of prudence or of justice; or to corrupt the future tranquillity of our minds, either by shame from the remembrance of our own folly, or by remorse from the horror of our own injustice.
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Adam Smith (The Theory of Moral Sentiments)
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Bad boys were highly overrated.
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Kylie Scott (Lick (Stage Dive, #1))
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strange evolution, that people have come to believe that we are its greatest achievement when really we're just a collection of cells overrating themselves
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Dave Matthews Band
β€œ
Truth, as he always said, was overrated, nobody ever won prizes for telling the truth.
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Sarah Winman (When God Was a Rabbit)
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Once I fucked you, it would be all over for me. I had to have a guarantee I could get you back. Christ, Blue, the first time I saw you, I wanted to throw you over the couch and fuck you." Blue flushed but smiled a little. "So why didn't you?" "Common decency." "Highly overrated.
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S.E. Jakes (Free Falling)
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I take it, sir, that you do not approve of our new society." "Approval, sir, in my opinion, demands the attainment of perfection. And in that sense, you rather overrate the charms of your society. I'faith, for one thing, it does seem monstrous ill-dressed for any society, even a new one.
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Emmuska Orczy
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Stability was overrated. Crises and adventures, on the other hand, could actually teach you something.
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Sarah Addison Allen
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I don't hold with shamans, witch doctors, or psychiatrists. Shakespeare, Tolstoy, or even Dickens, understood more about the human condition than ever occurred to any of you. You overrated bunch of charlatans deal with the grammar of human problems, and the writers I've mentioned with the essence.
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Mordecai Richler (Barney's Version)
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Dignity is overrated. You know what trumps dignity? Kissing.
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Nina LaCour (Everything Leads to You)
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that's exactly the good thing about the Injun life--you don't have to stop and think about whether or not you're 'happy'--which in my opinion is a highly overrated human condition invented by white folks
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Jim Fergus (One Thousand White Women: The Journals of May Dodd (One Thousand White Women, #1))
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Study's overrated. Just find someone smart to copy off. -Adrian to Lissa
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Richelle Mead (Blood Promise (Vampire Academy, #4))
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Being normal is overrated. Normal gets you whatβ€”the dolt husband with the 2.5 kids and the house with the dog? You seriously want that? I mean, one of those kids is going to be really funny looking, by the way, all cut in half like that. Who wants half a kid?
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H.M. Ward (Damaged (Damaged, #1))
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Normal is overrated.” Cassie nudged me toward the bar. β€œExtraordinary is unforgettable.
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Kerri Maniscalco (Escaping from Houdini (Stalking Jack the Ripper, #3))
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...If it wasn’t for you, I’d think that angels were all totally interchangeable.’ β€˜You mean because I’m beyond perfect?’ β€˜No. Because you’re so humble.’ β€˜Humility’s overrated.’ β€˜So is clear self-assessment, apparently.’ β€˜Real warriors don’t stand for psychobabble.’ β€˜Or for rational thinking.’ He glances at my naked legs. β€˜No, not that rational, I admit.
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Susan Ee (End of Days (Penryn & the End of Days, #3))
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Sincerity and gravity, in Magnus's opinion, were highly overrated, as was being forced to relive unpleasant memories. He would much rather be amused and amusing.
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Cassandra Clare (The Bane Chronicles)
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When it was done and I went to sleep, I lay awake and listened to the clock on your nightstand and the wind outside and understood that I was really home, that in bed with you was home, and something that had been getting close in the dark was suddenly gone. It could not stay. It had been banished. It knew how to come back, I was sure of that, but it could not stay and I could really go to sleep. My heart cracked with gratitude. I think it was the first gratitude I’ve ever really known. I lay there beside you and the tears rolled down the sides of my face and onto the pillow. I loved you then and I love you now and I have loved you every second in between. I don’t care if you understand me. Understanding is vastly overrated, but nobody ever gets enough safety. I’ve never forgotten how safe I felt with that thing gone out of the darkness.
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Stephen King (Lisey's Story)
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In his opinion, working was vastly overrated. Particularly as a way to build character, for everyone who engaged in it was far too snappish and fussy, and seemed to have no manners at all.
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Hilari Bell (Crown of Earth (The Shield, Sword, and Crown, #3))
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Being an icon is overrated, remember an icon can be moved by a mouse
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William Shatner
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A smart woman would have shut up. Did I? Hell no. Intelligence is overrated anyway.
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Rachel Vincent (Stray (Shifters, #1))
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This idea of perpetual happiness is crazy and overrated, because those dark moments fuel you for the next bright moments; each one helps you appreciate the other.
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Brad Pitt
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Happiness is good, but well-overrated: what we hate most are the very motivators that put us in gear. A man drifts along with little to contribute until something agitates him enough to make a difference, whether for himself or for his communities.
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Criss Jami (Killosophy)
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His two front teeth are slightly crooked, veer just a tiny bit to the right, as if they've decided perfection is overrated. His smile is like unlocking a riddle. How does an imperfection make him seem more perfect?
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Julie Buxbaum (Tell Me Three Things)
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Sanity is overrated.
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Cynthia Hand (Boundless (Unearthly, #3))
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Falling in love has been greatly overrated. Falling in love consists of 45 percent fear of not being accepted, 45 percent manic hope that this time the fear will be put to shame and a modest 10 percent frail awareness of the possibility of love. I don't fall in love any more. Just like I don't get the mumps.
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Peter HΓΈeg (Smilla's Sense of Snow)
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No matter that we could be beheaded for this,” said Esa. β€œHeads are overrated.” β€œYes, they are so unfashionable,” said Miri, imitating an Aslandian accent. β€œThis spring, ladies of style are wearing their feathers in their necks.
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Shannon Hale (Palace of Stone (Princess Academy, #2))
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Australians are very unfair in this way. They spend half of any conversation insisting that the country's dangers are vastly overrated and that there's nothing to worry about, and the other half telling you how six months ago their Uncle Bob was driving to Mudgee when a tiger snake slid out from under the dashboard and bit him on the groin, but that it's okay now because he's off the life support machine and they've discovered he can communicate with eye blinks.
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Bill Bryson (In a Sunburned Country)
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Nice. Now that's an overrated quality
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Beth Fantaskey
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Understatement is overrated
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Leigh Bardugo (Ruin and Rising (The Shadow and Bone Trilogy, #3))
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The few love affairs which had come my way had been rather silly and sordid. They had not revealed the possibilities of love; in fact I had thought it a somewhat overrated pleasure, a brief and brutal blindness with boredom and disgust hard on its heels.
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Aleister Crowley (Diary of a Drug Fiend)
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And I know [other] faces aren't this colorful, this vivid, this lived-in, this superbly off-site, this brimming with dark unpredictable music. NOT THAT I EFFING NOTICE... For the record, breathing is overrated.
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Jandy Nelson (I'll Give You the Sun)
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Normal is overrated and experience. Being just like everyone else, getting lost in the crowd is nothing to strive for.
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S.L. Naeole (Black Halo (Grace, #3))
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Perfection is overrated. Perfection is boring
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Stephanie Perkins (Lola and the Boy Next Door (Anna and the French Kiss, #2))
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Selfishness is one of the principal fruits of the corruption of human nature; and it is obvious that selfishness disposes us to over-rate our good qualities, and to overlook or extenuate our defects.
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William Wilberforce (Real Christianity)
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Find a way back in. Waiting is overrated." -Van
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Jennifer Foor (Risking Fate (Mitchell Family, #4))
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No one could ever truly be free as long as they loved, and life wasn't worth living without love. So freedom? Overrated.
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Gena Showalter (Unraveled (Intertwined, #2))
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You young people are always so obsessed with truth. The truth is often overrated.
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Maggie O'Farrell (The Hand That First Held Mine)
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In my opinion, moderation is a vastly overrated virtue, particularly when applied to work
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Barbara Taylor Bradford (A Woman of Substance (Emma Harte Saga #1))
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I want a wild love....I want this feeling I have with you where it hurts to breathe when you get too far away, where my skin itches uncontrollably when you look at me. Where thinking feels overrated because we both know nothing and no one will ever feel like this. Like us.
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Elsie Silver (Wild Love (Rose Hill, #1))
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I believe that anyone who says that sex is overrated just hasn't done it properly. I believe that anyone who claims to know what's going on will lie about the little things too. I believe in absolute honesty and sensible social lies. I believe in a woman's right to choose, a baby's right to live, that while all human life is sacred there's nothing wrong with the death penalty if you can trust the legal system implicitly, and that no one but a moron would ever trust the legal system. I believe that life is a game, that life is a cruel joke, and that life is what happens when you're alive and that you might as well lie back and enjoy it.
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Neil Gaiman (American Gods (American Gods, #1))
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Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days. Crash Davis Bull Durham
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Ron Shelton
β€œ
Denise's first thought on seeing her blood stain Spade's lips was "oh shit". Then the fire that leapt into his gaze and the way he dominated her mouth in his next kiss made her decide that self-preservation was overrated.
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Jeaniene Frost (First Drop of Crimson (Night Huntress World, #1))
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The best performers set goals that are not about the outcome but about the process of reaching the outcome.
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Geoff Colvin (Talent is Overrated: What Really Separates World-Class Performers from Everybody Else)
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Did I have to be dead to get you to see me? Wake the fuck up, Ms. Lane. Dying is overrated. Human sentimentality has twisted it into the ultimate act of love. Biggest load of bullshit in the world. Dying for someone isn't the hard thing. The man that dies escapes. Plan and simple. Game over. End of pain. Alina was the lucky one. Try living for someone. Through it all - good, bad, thick, thin, joy, suffering. That's the hard thing.
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Karen Marie Moning (Shadowfever (Fever, #5))
β€œ
Don't drive drunk. Ever. Don't shag anyone you don't like, or who doesn't like you. Get a look at how people live in a place where you don't. Suffering is over-rated, don't pursue it. Ask for help when you need it, don't when you don't, and learn to recognize the difference. Don't confuse movement and progress. Be kind. Be forgiving. Pay attention.
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Christopher Moore
β€œ
Why do you want me?" I asked, suppressing the trembling of my voice. "I’m strange, definitely not perfect, and fucked up. Actually, a lot of the latter.” β€œPerfect is boring and overrated.” He smiled that lopsided grin of his that made my lower abdomen twist and curl with delicious desire. β€œI’m looking for sexy, fun, kind, and honest. And you tick all the right boxes, Brooke.
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J.C. Reed (Surrender Your Love (Surrender Your Love, #1))
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I glance down at the over-sized t-shirt and socks I’m wearing. β€œYou’d be sadly disappointed if you actually saw what I wear to bed.” β€œYou know, clothes are overrated as far as I’m concerned. I’m good with you totally doing away with them when you visit me.” I can hear the smile in his voice. β€œNoel...” I say his name like a warning.
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Michelle A. Valentine (Rock the Heart (Black Falcon, #1))
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Don't have a mother,' he said. Not only had he no mother, but he had not the slightest desire to have one. He thought them very over-rated persons.
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J.M. Barrie
β€œ
deliberate practice requires that one identify certain sharply defined elements of performance that need to be improved, and then work intently on them.
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Geoff Colvin (Talent is Overrated: What Really Separates World-Class Performers from Everybody Else)
β€œ
I love you,” I sighed, unable to keep the smile from my face, leaning back and looking at him through heavy-lidded eyes. β€œI really do.” β€œI know,” he grunted, very pleased with himself. β€œYou can’t live without me. I’m like cheese.” It took a second to process his comment. β€œI’m sorry, cheese?” β€œSure. Air’s overrated. Try living without cheese.” The man was insane, which, it turned out, was just perfect for me.
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Mary Calmes
β€œ
Do you know the only value life has is what life puts upon itself? And it is of course overestimated, for it is of necessity prejudiced in its own favour. Take that man I had aloft. He held on as if he were a precious thing, a treasure beyond diamonds of rubies. To you? No. To me? Not at all. To himself? Yes. But I do not accept his estimate. He sadly overrates himself. There is plenty more life demanding to be born. Had he fallen and dripped his brains upon the deck like honey from the comb, there would have been no loss to the world. The supply is too large.
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Jack London (The Sea Wolf)
β€œ
He grimaced and went after her. β€œI’m not a trainer. Just spent a lot of time working out.”  β€œMisspent youth, clearly.” She held the door open, standing just outside.Β  β€œMy application to princess school was rejected.” Callan exited the building and fell into step alongside her. β€œWorking out was how I coped.” Sunlight peeked out from behind striped clouds and lit the early-morning sky. Autumn weather chilled the perspiration on his skin.Β  β€œSuch a shame.” Meridian glanced up at him out of the corner of her eye.Β  β€œWhat is?”  β€œThat you didn’t go to princess school. Could have learned some manners.” Her blue-green eyes sparked in the sunlight. And her mouth . . . Her lips set in some smart-looking, lopsided grin, with a small dimple.Β  IΒ should definitely kiss that look off her face. β€œOverrated. Inefficient. And I look terrible in a tiara.
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J. Rose Black (Losing My Breath)
β€œ
I'm thinking that it will be autumn soon," she said, lifting her gaze to his. "Autumn is my absolute favorite season. Spring is overrated. It's soggy and the trees are still bare from winter. Winter drags on and on, and summer is nice, but it's all the same. Autumn is different. I mean, is there any perfume in the world that can compare with the smell of burning leaves?" she asked with an engaging smile. Matt thought she smelled a hell of a lot better than burning leaves, but he let her continue. "Autumn β€”is thexincgitsinagre changing. It's like dusk." "Dusk?" "Dusk is my favorite time of day, for the same reason. When I was young, I used to walk down our driveway at dusk in the summer and stand at the fence, watching all the cars going by with their headlights on. Everyone had a place to go, something to do. The night was just beginning ..." She trailed off in embarrassment. "That must sound incredibly silly." "It sounds incredibly lonely.
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Judith McNaught (Paradise (Paradise, #1))
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Do you know the only value life has is what life puts upon itself? And it is of course over-estimated since it is of necessity prejudiced in its own favour. Take that man I had aloft. He held on as if he were a precious thing, a treasure beyond diamonds or rubies. To you? No. To me? Not at all. To himself? Yes. But I do not accept his estimate. He sadly overrates himself. There is plenty more life demanding to be born. Had he fallen and dripped his brains upon the deck like honey from the comb, there would have been no loss to the world. He was worth nothing to the world. The supply is too large. To himself only was he of value, and to show how fictitious even this value was, being dead he is unconscious that he has lost himself. He alone rated himself beyond diamonds and rubies. Diamonds and rubies are gone, spread out on the deck to be washed away by a bucket of sea- water, and he does not even know that the diamonds and rubies are gone. He does not lose anything, for with the loss of himself he loses the knowledge of loss. Don't you see? And what have you to say?
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Jack London (The Sea Wolf)
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The show doesn’t go on because it’s ready; it goes on because it’s 11:30. This is something Lorne [Michaels] has said often about Saturday Night Live, but I think it’s a great lesson about not being too precious about your writing. You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke you can until the last possible second, and then you have to let it go. You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute. (And I’m from a generation where a lot of people died on waterslides, so this was an important lesson for me to learn.) You have to let people see what you wrote. It will never be perfect, but perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring on live TV. What I learned about β€˜bombing’ as an improviser at Second City was that bombing is painful, but it doesn’t kill you. No matter how badly an improv set goes, you will still be physically alive when it’s over. What I learned about bombing as a writer at Saturday Night is that you can’t be too worried about your β€˜permanent record.’ Yes, you’re going to write some sketches that you love and are proud of foreverβ€”your golden nuggets. But you’re also going to write some real shit nuggets. And unfortunately, sometimes the shit nuggets will make it onto the air. You can’t worry about it. As long as you know the difference, you can go back to panning for gold on Monday.
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Tina Fey (Bossypants)
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Here’s what I’ve got, the reasons why our marriage might work: Because you wear pink but write poems about bullets and gravestones. Because you yell at your keys when you lose them, and laugh, loudly, at your own jokes. Because you can hold a pistol, gut a pig. Because you memorize songs, even commercials from thirty years back and sing them when vacuuming. You have soft hands. Because when we moved, the contents of what you packed were written inside the boxes. Because you think swans are overrated. Because you drove me to the train station. You drove me to Minneapolis. You drove me to Providence. Because you underline everything you read, and circle the things you think are important, and put stars next to the things you think I should think are important, and write notes in the margins about all the people you’re mad at and my name almost never appears there. Because you make that pork recipe you found in the Frida Khalo Cookbook. Because when you read that essay about Rilke, you underlined the whole thing except the part where Rilke says love means to deny the self and to be consumed in flames. Because when the lights are off, the curtains drawn, and an additional sheet is nailed over the windows, you still believe someone outside can see you. And one day five summers ago, when you couldn’t put gas in your car, when your fridge was so emptyβ€”not even leftovers or condimentsβ€” there was a single twenty-ounce bottle of Mountain Dew, which you paid for with your last damn dime because you once overheard me say that I liked it.
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Matthew Olzmann