Overextending Quotes

By the way, when Oprah Winfrey is suggesting you may have overextended yourself, you need to examine your fucking life.

If a responsible, mentally sound American wants to own and AR-15, that’s their right. Besides, when the zombies come…okay, you don’t like the zombie thing. When the Chinese invade our country, who do you want to depend on? The over-extended police force and the National Guard? Or the next door neighbor who’s a former Marine and has enough guns and ammunition for your entire block?

I have far more enthusiasm in life than I have actual energy. In my excitement, I routinely take on more that I can physically or emotionally handle, which causes me to break down in quite predictable displays of dramatic exhaustion. You will be the one burdened with the job of mopping me up every time I've overextended myself and then fallen apart. This will be unbelievably tedious. I apologize in advance.

Warm laundry, radio, waiting for the bus. I could get frustrated, overextended, overwhelmed, uncomfortable. Sometimes I ran late. But these banal inefficiencies—I thought they were luxuries, the mark of the unencumbered. Time to do nothing, to let my mind run anywhere, to be in the world. At the very least, they made me feel human.

That is because you don't yet know how to deal with time," said Wen. "But I will teach you to deal with time as you would deal with a coat, to be worn when necessary and discarded when not." "Will I have to wash it?" said Clodpool. Wen gave him a long, slow look. "That was either a very complex piece of thinking on your part, Clodpool, or you were just trying to overextend a metaphor in a rather stupid way. Which, do you think, it was?" Clodpool looked at his feet. Then he looked at the sky. Then he looked at Wen. "I think I am stupid, master." "Good," said Wen. "It is fortuitous that you are my apprentice at this time, because if I can teach you, Clodpool, I can teach anyone.

We ourselves are the substance we withdraw to, not from, as we pull our overextended and misplaced creative energy back into our own core.

Much of our lack of peace is the result of willingly exploiting ourselves by creating an overextended, imbalanced lifestyle organized around trying to accumulate what we often do not need and which is detrimental to our physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being.

If you grew up with emotionally immature parents, you may face your own challenges with reciprocity, having learned to give either too much or not enough. Your parents’ self-preoccupied demands may have distorted your natural instincts about fairness. If you were an internalizer, you learned that in order to be loved or desirable, you need to give more than you get; otherwise you’ll be of no value to others. If you were an externalizer, you may have the false belief that others don’t really love you unless they prove it by always putting you first and repeatedly overextending themselves for you.

...have you ever thought you knew someone--I mean really knew someone--then realized that the person you thought you knew only existed in your overextended mind...

The state of being frantic, overextended and distracted drives people away rather than drawing them in and inviting them to the refuge of your company.

When you heed only your lion, you will find yourself overextended and exhausted. When you take notice only of your lamb, you will easily become a victim of your need for other people’s attention.

Since reading and writing didn’t come easily, Irving learned that “to do anything really well, you have to overextend yourself. . . . In my case, I learned that I just had to pay twice as much attention. I came to appreciate that in doing something over and over again, something that was never natural becomes almost second nature. You learn that you have the capacity for that, and that it doesn’t come overnight.

The all-pervading disease of the modern world is the total imbalance between city and countryside, an imbalance in terms of wealth, power, culture, attraction and hope. The former has become over-extended and the latter has atrophied. The city has become the universal magnet, while rural life has lost its savour. Yet it remains an unalterable truth that, just as a sound mind depends on a sound body, so the health of the cities depends on the health of the rural areas. The cities, with all their wealth, are merely secondary producers, while primary production, the precondition of all economic life, takes place in the countryside. The prevailing lack of balance, based on the age-old exploitation of countryman and raw material producer, today threatens all countries throughout the world, the rich even more than the poor. To restore a proper balance between city and rural life is perhaps the greatest task in front of modern man.

Omnidirectional peaceful diplomacy” is all very well for the present, but how useful will it be if an overextended United States does withdraw from its Asian commitments, or finds it impossible to protect the flow of oil from Arabia to Yokohama? How

Typically, the louder a voice gets, the bigger the knot in my gut grows. So I have to turn my heart and mind toward our Heavenly Father and ask, “Is this pit in my stomach about today or is it about what already happened in the past or about what I’m afraid might happen in the future?

Omnidirectional peaceful diplomacy” is all very well for the present, but how useful will it be if an overextended United States does withdraw from its Asian commitments, or finds it impossible to protect the flow of oil from Arabia to Yokohama? How useful if there is another Korean war? How useful if China begins to dominate the region? How

If you believe being overly busy and overextended is evidence of productivity, then you probably believe that creating space to explore, think, and reflect should be kept to a minimum. Yet these very activities are the antidote to the nonessential busyness that infects so many of us. Rather than trivial diversions, they are critical to distinguishing what is actually a trivial diversion from what is truly essential.

I don't have enough time. I am being pulled in too many directions. Someone or something is stealing my time. Whether you complain that you are overworked and overextended or you believe that other people, obligations, or competing loyalties are forcing you to postpone or cancel your own aspirations or dreams, you're basically saying one thing: you are inefficient. Yes, it's your fault. It's bullshit and you can change that.

often think about what would happen if, for just one day, women everywhere refused to overextend themselves. I truly believe the world as we know it would crumble. Remembering people’s birthdays, cleaning clothes, cooking, tidying up after others, anticipating others’ needs, being polite to men who make us uncomfortable, doing our makeup in the mornings and skincare routine before bed, offering our help without any real acknowledgment for it. Women are often in positions where they have to constantly remind others to take care of themselves, neglecting themselves in the process. This is why self-care is uniquely important for women and marginalized genders.

It wasn’t just other writers who weighed in. The comments section of Shawna’s article blew up. “I might need a whole day to myself to recharge after a party, and I really feel like I was hung over: headache, nausea, fatigue, the whole shebang,” one reader comments. Another agrees: “I often need the next day to recover, which is why I try really hard to never schedule two days of socializing back to back.” And: “I definitely become physically unwell if I overextend.” When Shawna wrote about her experiences, she had no idea she would hit on a topic that resonated so deeply with many introverts. It turns out Shawna was not alone in her introvert hangover. The introvert hangover is real.

The worldview of the underdog socialist is that the neoliberals have mastered the game of reason, judgment, and statistics, leaving the left with emotion. Its heart is in the right place. Underdog socialists have a surfeit of compassion and find prevailing policies deeply unfair. Seeing the welfare state crumbling to dust, they rush in to salvage what they can. But when push comes to shove, the underdog socialist caves in to the arguments of the opposition, always accepting the premise on which the debate takes place... The underdog socialist forgets that the real problem isn't the national debt, but overextended households and businesses. He forgets that fighting poverty is an investment that pays off in spades. And he forgets that, all the while, the bankers and the lawyers are polishing turds at the expense of waste collectors and nurses.

They Give Back Fairness and reciprocity are at the heart of good relationships. Emotionally mature people don’t like taking advantage of people, nor do they like the feeling of being used. They want to help and are generous with their time, but they also ask for attention and assistance when they need it. They’re willing to give more than they get back for awhile, but they won’t let an imbalance go on indefinitely. If you grew up with emotionally immature parents, you may face your own challenges with reciprocity, having learned to give either too much or not enough. Your parents’ self-preoccupied demands may have distorted your natural instincts about fairness. If you were an internalizer, you learned that in order to be loved or desirable, you need to give more than you get; otherwise you’ll be of no value to others. If you were an externalizer, you may have the false belief that others don’t really love you unless they prove it by always putting you first and repeatedly overextending themselves for you.

Archangel Raphael This is the realm of healing Love. As natural healers from the heart, you who carry this realm innately project blue healing rays through your hands. As a Raphaelite, the way your Soul emanates its gifts is through this healing energy. You don’t need to do anything outwardly for healing Love to be radiated to others. Raphaelites have a tendency to overexert this healing influence unnecessarily. It works on the level of being, not doing. In essence, healing naturally occurs wherever the frequency of Love is present. You Raphaelites can overextend yourselves based on your feeling that everything needs healing, feeling that it’s your job to bring that healing Love wherever it is lacking. That is an endless, exhausting, fruitless task. Love is the same energy as life force. You are here to help us to return to the natural state of wholeness through the power of healing Love. You are always present with understanding and care. You are loving individuals who have a tendency to deplete yourselves by attempting to fill the seemingly endless needs of others. Your challenge is to discern who is part of your Soul plan to extend your energy toward and how to do it in a way that does not leave you depleted. You are here to show people that Love is an infinite commodity universally available. It is not yours to personally give to others. When a Raphaelite feels the need to personally give the divine Love they inherently feel connected to, to another, as though it belongs solely to them, it can become a caretaking exchange, which is disempowering to both people. This caretaking level of love is different than the frequency of divine Love. Healing as Love is not meant to be at the level of caretaking. It is not for you to say, “I’ll give all I have to you, because it feels so natural to do so, and it doesn’t matter if I get anything in return.” This state can lead to the expectation for others that you are here to fill their needs for Love. The Raphaelite is here to remind us that divine Love is the healing force moving through everyone. You must visualize or feel an umbilical cord from your heart to the source of divine Love. This is how Love, in fact, feeds us all. The channel from our Creator to our heart is filled with divine Love. When we feel thanksgiving for the eternal presence of Love, it ignites the miracle of healing that hasn’t held a place for Love. We can co-create as Love with those around us freely and appropriately from this place and this place alone. Remember, healer, to heal yourself first in this way and you will have much to give and will be rewarded joyously in return for that gift. The Raphael realm can be tapped into any time by anyone requesting the healing balm of Love that is vital to our life nourishment. We are designed to know this healing Love as a natural flow of our heart’s expression.

Jimmy and Grace returned to Detroit in late August, in time to participate in the final work to relaunch Correspondence. On September 21–22 the organization held a national convention in Detroit attended by the full membership across the country, just as they had done with the initial founding of the paper. During the convention Jimmy and Lyman were elected as the cochairmen of the organization. 77 This reflected a solidification of Jimmy’s leadership of the organization. In title Jimmy and Lyman shared responsibility, but in practice, with Jimmy there in Detroit and Lyman in Los Angeles, “90% of the burden of national leadership rest[ ed] with” Jimmy, as Glaberman described the situation. In a letter to C. L. R., Glaberman reported that Jimmy had been “the key figure in the convention” and “he remains that today. He consciously and vigorously took over the direction of the organization and his leadership was accepted by everyone.” Given the many activities and spaces in which Jimmy had taken responsibility for building the organization—leading editorial committees and reaching out to workers in his neighborhood and at Chrysler—Glaberman expressed concern that Jimmy not overextend himself: “The organization looks to him to give direction on all these things and he is not very cooperative when any attempt is made to slow him down.” 78

Unhealthy giving is characterized by the following:  Excessive need to be needed—in other words, feeling worthwhile only if needed by others.  Doing too much for another person in the process of helping him or her, thus preventing that person from taking responsibility and fully achieving all that is possible.  Focusing on the needs and reactions of others to the extent of losing sight of one’s own needs, perceptions, limitations, and feelings. On the other hand, healthy giving by those in helping roles is characterized by the following:  Supporting another person to be the best that he or she can be.  Recognizing and valuing one’s own needs, perceptions, limitations, and feeling.  Self-compassion.  Ability and willingness (of the helper) to ask for help.

Many helpers who have difficulty accepting their own limitations are also perfectionistic. It is important to make a distinction between perfection and excellence, yet many people find it difficult to do so. Here’s a useful distinction between the two: The pursuit of excellence allows for error and self-compassion; perfectionists, on the other hand, cannot tolerate their own weakness. While perfectionists have compassion for others, they have little or no compassion for themselves. Furthermore, they tend to be highly self-critical, while attempting to live up to unrealistic standards.

Break the mold, do whatever the hell you want within your abilities. Don't overextend yourself to create a false appearance of wealth and success

Only one aspect of the Vision resonated sharply throughout his first eight months in office. During the second presidential debate with Al Gore, on October 11, 2000, George W. Bush promised a less interventionist foreign policy than that of the Clinton-Gore administration – one, in keeping with his Responsibility Era, that would encourage self-reliance while curbing its own meddlesome Great Power Impulses. “I am worried,” Bush said then, “about over committing our military around the world. I want to be judicious in its use… I think what we need to do is convince people who live in the lands they live in to build nations. Maybe I’m missing something here. I mean, we’re going to have kind of a nation-building corps from America? Absolutely not. Our military is meant to fight and win war; that’s what its meant to do. And when it gets overextended, moreal drops… I’m going to be judicious as to how I use the military. It needed to be in our vital interest, the mission needs to be clear, and the exit strategy obvious.

The people who are most vulnerable to overextending themselves on behalf of ministry relationships are people who struggle with intimacy—both with God and others. Ministry can be a great place for them to feel connected and loved, but the truth is, without the accountability that only comes from covenant friendships, they are just being set up for burnout or compromise.

When the speed of our lives makes us feel stressed, drained, and overextended, we blame ourselves. After all, everyone else seems to be keeping up. To succeed, we believe we just need to hang in there and keep going—pushing past the pain, past our limits, and past our well-being. When we do achieve our goals by rushing, straining, and keeping up, we don’t necessarily feel good; we might experience a sense of relief, but that relief comes with a high price tag: burnout, disconnection, stress. But isn’t the point of all that hard work and suffering to be happy? Isn’t the idea that success will bring happiness?

My lady, don't you think you might be over-extending yourself? You've decided to confront the gyorn, liberate the court women from masculine oppression, save Arelon's economy, and feed Elantris. Perhaps you should just let this man's subterfuge go unexplored.

If you were valued primarily for your ability to excel, you may form an assumption that being average means you won’t be loved or valued. If you don’t perform according to a particular standard, you are a failure. You may have a belief that you must be the best at whatever I do. You may believe that it is wrong for you to disappoint others. You might have a hidden assumption that if someone you care about feels let down by you and you are unable to fix it, you are a bad or defective person.

Conventional economics is the dominant intellectual rationalization of today’s world order. As we’ve overextended the growth phase of our global adaptive cycle, this rationalization has become relentlessly more complex and rigid and progressively less tenable. Breakdown will, all at once, discredit this rationalization and create intellectual space for new ideas to flourish. But this space will be brutally competitive. We can boost the chances that humane alternatives will thrive by working them out in detail and disseminating them as widely as possible beforehand.89 Advance planning means we need to develop a wide range of scenarios and experiment with technologies, organizations, and ideas. We’ll do better at these tasks, and we’ll also do better in the confusing aftermath of breakdown, if we use a decentralized approach to solving our problems, because traditional centralized and top-down approaches aren’t nimble enough, and they stifle creativity. Scientists have found that complex systems that are highly adaptive—like markets and even the immune system of mammals—tend to share certain characteristics. First of all, the individual elements that make up the systems—such as companies in a market economy or T-cells and macrophages in an immune system—are extraordinarily diverse. Second, the power to make decisions and solve problems isn’t centralized in one place or thing; instead, it’s distributed across the system’s elements. The elements are then linked in a loose network that allows them to exchange information about what works and what doesn’t. Often in a market economy, for example, several companies will be working at the same time to solve different parts of a shared problem, and important information about solutions will flow between them. Third and finally, highly adaptive systems are unstable enough to create unexpected innovations but orderly enough to learn from their failures and successes. Systems with these three characteristics stimulate constant experimentation, and they generate a variety of problem-solving strategies.90 We

but I was carrying still carrying the jade crock and my coat, and I didn’t want to over-extend myself before the race. I

to do anything really well, you have to overextend yourself,

Companies only have to be “big enough,” which rarely means they have to dominate. Often “big enough” is just 10 percent of the market. Yet companies under the influence of winner-takes-all thinking tend to pursue illusory scale advantages. In doing so, they are likely to damage their own performance by cutting price to gain volume, by overextending themselves to serve all market segments, and by pursuing overpriced mergers and acquisitions.

In addition, some who are Crashed have a personality type of being eager to please or help others. They may have a hard time saying no when asked to contribute. In any event, they find themselves overextended for too long. To heal your adrenals, you need less on your plate and more time to care for yourself.

Embrace the new way: firm boundaries and selective 'no's. Say goodbye to overextending and sacrificing quality. Say hello to reclaiming your time, energy, and focus on what truly matters.

The frustration some express with capitalism—and the overextended interference into it—is misplaced. Capitalism is not the problem. Capitalism does not cause poor education; it does not cause discrimination; it does not cause inadequate healthcare; and it does not cause poverty. And further, the existence of wealth does not cause poverty. Poverty is not caused by wealth; misfortune is not caused by fortune.

(By the way, when Oprah Winfrey is suggesting you may have overextended yourself, you need to examine your fucking life.) Around

the prudent person neither neglects important commitments nor gets overextended.

[Concerning the 'over-extended domain' of Yahweh:] It is very interesting to observe that, in the Bible, Yahweh is not exclusively linked to Israel. This point is clearly stressed in the book of Amos, where it is claimed: 'On that day...they may possess the remnant of Edom and all the nations who are called by my name, says the LORD who does this' (Amos 9.11-12). Indeed, it appears from many biblical sources that Yahweh also 'protects' the Canaanite alliances of Edom, Moab and Amon, sometimes against the political interest of the Israelite Alliance. [61] Even more intriguing is the special attention, in the book of Jeremiah, devoted to the far country of Elam: I [Yahweh] will terrify Elam before their enemies, and before those who seek their life; I will bring disaster upon them, my fierce anger, says the LORD. I will send the sword after them, until I have consumed them; and I will set my throne in Elam, and destroy their king and officials, says the LORD. But in the latter days I will restore the fortunes of Elam, says the LORD (Jer. 49.37-39). This oracle is amazingly similar to those devoted to Judah and Israel. Such a commitment concerning Elam suggests that the Elamites were also regarded here as a 'people of Yahweh'. In this case, however, one has to assume a homology (if not an identity) between Yahweh and Napir ('the great god'), the main deity of Elam, who was also the god of metallurgy. (pp. 401-402) (from 'Yahweh, the Canaanite God of Metallurgy?', JSOT 33.4 (2009): 387-404) [61] It is especially mentioned that the Israelites cannot conquer the lands of Edom, Moab and Ammon, since Yahweh has given them forever to the sons of Esau (Deut. 2.5) and Lot (Deut. 2.9, 19). In Jer. 9.24-25, Edom, Moab and Ammon are considered together with Judah as the circumcised, the peoples of Yahweh. The Amos oracles against Amon, Moab, Damas or Edom (Amos 1 and 2) not only mention their 'cimres' against Judah and Israel, but also all the 'crimes' perpetrated between and among them in regard to Yahweh.

The over-extended domain of Yahweh should not be regarded as the consequence of a rapid diffusion of the Israelite religion during the First Temple period. It is rather the expression of a very ancient homology (if not identity) existing between the gods of metallurgy during the Bronze Age. (p. 403) (from 'Yahweh, the Canaanite God of Metallurgy?', JSOT 33.4 (2009): 387-404)

The Empty Feeling Have you ever noticed how continuously striving to achieve, conceive and receive more and more, actually most often leaves you feeling totally bloated and overextended, yet at the very same time, absolutely empty and utterly unsatisfied?   This is most certainly never a part of the plan you signed up for!

Suppiluliuma I came to the throne while the mighty Amenhotep III ruled in Egypt and Kadashman-Enlil I sat on the throne in Babylon (Kuhrt 1:336). Known for his military endeavors, Suppiluliuma first conquered lands the Hittites had lost in Anatolia during the Dark Age before he turned his attention south to Mittani (Macqueen 2003, 46). At the same time, Suppiluliuma was also a diplomat who saw the virtues of providing for his people through peaceful means. Instead of attacking Babylon and overextending his empire as Mursili I did, Suppiluliuma I contracted a marriage with the Babylonian king’s daughter (Macqueen 2003, 46). Perhaps Suppiluliuma I hoped to one day make a claim to the throne of Babylon, or one of his potential future sons from the Babylonian princess could, but all of his sons appear to have been born to a Hittite queen

He looked over at me now, his eyes wet. "Will you come and lay down with me first?" "Well, gee, Lyle . . . gee. Actually, I think Miss Manners would advise against it. I mean, with my lover waiting down in the car and all. I think you have a good bit to learn about timing—about the social graces. I'm pretty sure we'd both feel very, very bad afterwards. Also, these days I'm a bit overextended in that department.

Ironically, our feelings of lack of productivity and not measuring up have not led us until now to “read” the institution; our self-blame has played into corporate values. As many have commented, there has been little protest from academics to the attack on the core principles of the university. It is not only that academics are “run off their feet” (Menzies and Newson, “Over-Extended Academic” par. 3) but also that the individualistic and meritocratic values of academic training inhibit collective awareness. While

She knew she was overextended, but she couldn't help herself. Student, tree lover, citizen of the Earth, she was busier than ever as she raced through Berkeley on her bicycle, and stood on street corners with petitions. She was a blithe spirit, and increasingly a hungry one. Vegan, but not always strict. She never ate meat or tuna fish or honey harvested from indentured bees, but sometimes she craved eggs, and cheese, and even butter, and she bought herself a croissant or ate a slice of whole-wheat pizza, or a box of saltine crackers which she ate in bed, one by one, so that they dissolved on her tongue like the heavenly host.

Pastors are over-extended taking care of a few hundred sheep in their church

The antidote for exhaustion from our overextended calendars isn’t just being still, however, or He would have stopped with that command. We are to know that He is God. He is the Creator of the world, the One who cannot fail, the One who loves us without measure and whose promises are trustworthy.

Take care of yourself before you’re completely fried Figure out whether you’re overextended, disengaged, or feeling ineffective If you’re overextended, get comfortable living at 80 percent and say no more often If you’re disengaged, seek connection and craft a more meaningful schedule If you feel ineffective, find ways to achieve clear wins and realign your life with your values If you feel all three, detach your worth from your work and embrace “garbage time

In the ancient world the intuitive awareness of break boundaries as points of reversal and of no return was embodied in the Greek idea of hubris, which Toynbee presents in his Study of History, under the head of “The Nemesis of Creativity” and “The Reversal of Roles.” The Greek dramatists presented the idea of creativity as creating, also, its own kind of blindness, as in the case of Oedipus Rex, who solved the riddle of the Sphinx. It was as if the Greeks felt that the penalty for one break-through was a general sealing-off of awareness to the total field. In a Chinese work—The Way and Its Power (A. Waley translation)—there is a series of instances of the overheated medium, the overextended man or culture, and the peripety or reversal that inevitably follows: He who stands on tiptoe does not stand firm; He who takes the longest strides does not walk the fastest … He who boasts of what he will do succeeds in nothing; He who is proud of his work achieves nothing that endures. One of the most common causes of breaks in any system is the cross-fertilization with another system, such as happened to print with the steam press, or with radio and movies (that yielded the talkies). Today with microfilm and micro-cards, not to mention electric memories, the printed word assumes again much of the handicraft character of a manuscript. But printing from movable type was, itself, the major break boundary in the history of phonetic literacy, just as the phonetic alphabet had been the break boundary between tribal and individualist man.

When we feel unfocused, tired, and lazy, it’s often because we desperately need some time to rest our bodies and brains. Research has repeatedly shown that a person on the verge of burnout will have trouble staying focused and productive.40 No amount of pressure and stress can magically help a person overcome that lack of focus and motivation. The solution is to cut way back on expectations for a while. Overextended people have to find space in their lives to sleep, power down their stressed-out minds, and recharge their mental and emotional batteries. You can wait until you reach a breaking point like Max and I did, or you can prevent illness and burnout by being gentle with yourself before it’s too late. The Laziness Lie has tried to convince us that our desires for rest and relaxation make us terrible people. It’s made us believe that having no motivation is shameful and must be avoided at all costs. In reality, our feelings of tiredness and idleness can help save us by signaling to us that we’re desperately in need of some downtime. When we stop fearing laziness, we can find time to reflect and recharge, to reconnect with the people and hobbies that we love, and to move through the world at a more intentional, peaceful pace. “Wasting time” is a basic human need. Once we accept that, we can stop fearing our inner “laziness” and begin to build healthy, happy, well-balanced lives.

The nature of our work means that we are constantly supporting others, and it can be easy to overextend and sacrifice ourselves for other people. If you’re the kind of person who typically puts others before themselves, it can be hard to create healthy boundaries, as it can feel selfish. But setting boundaries for ourselves helps us support others.

When we desire more than we need, we make ourselves vulnerable. When we overextend ourselves, when we chase, we are not self-sufficient.

To live a more balanced existence you have to recognize that not doing everything that comes along is okay. There is no need to overextend yourself. All it takes is realizing that it's alright to say no when necessary and then focus on your highest priorities.

Hydrocodone is expensive. Off-market, a full baggie can set you back three hundred dollars. KJ’s dealer waited for the two women to overextend themselves, and then offered much cheaper avenues to chase the same high: powder and black tar heroin.

The issue with people-pleasing is that you gain nothing from it. You are constantly giving and overextending yourself to people who wouldn't do the same for you. These connections thrive well between parties that lack boundaries. The takers, who don't know when to stop taking, and the givers, who don't know when to stop giving

Workers are desperate for more autonomy over their lives. They crave more balance and less precarity. They also, crucially, want to work. But they want to work for places that treat them as human beings and that invest in them and their futures. They want to be a part of organizations that recognize that meaningful and collaborative work can bring dignity and create value but that work is by no means the only way to cultivate satisfaction and self-worth. We know that workers who are overextended become too tired, frustrated, and anxious to do their best work; they’re too busy trying to tread water, look busy, and keep poorly communicating bosses happy.

Admit it, even though we’re super-tired and overextended, we still like to brag about all that we do and how much better women are at getting it done. But here’s the thing: There is no consistent data proving that women are better at multitasking than men. It’s just something we say to our girlfriends over coffee to feel better about all that we’ve piled on our own plates.

Impostors are preoccupied with acceptance and approval. Because of their suffocating need to please others, they cannot say no with the same confidence with which they say yes. And so they overextend themselves in people, projects, and causes, motivated not by personal commitment but by the fear of not living up to others’ expectations.

Another important factor to distinguish your site from others is to focus on what not to do. A lot of sites over-extend – too many SEO improvements can ruin your site usability and start generating diminishing returns. For example, they have heard that content is king, so let’s hammer away, usability be damned. Human nature then takes over, with multiple pages having similar content, keyword stuffing and acceptance of suboptimal guest posts. This results in excessive keyword density, which in turn attracts lower search rankings or penalties, as leading SERPs do not want a bunch of sites with reams of content dominating their first page.

And don’t over-extend a punch like that,” Toomsil added. “It comes from frustration and thinking about only that single blow. Have more patience and self-control. Consider what will happen if you miss, and what you’ll do about it.

The Dutch, who had been the unparalleled leaders in innovation, trade, and wealth in the 1600s, failed to keep up. Eventually the cost of maintaining a declining and overextended empire became unsustainable.

Banks could (and do) deny accounts to people who have a history of overextending their money, but those customers also provide a steady revenue system for some of the most powerful financial institutions in the world.

Porous boundaries are weak or poorly expressed and unintentionally harmful. They lead to feeling depleted, overextending yourself, depression, anxiety, and unhealthy relationship dynamics. Porous boundaries look like: • Oversharing • Codependency • Enmeshment (lacking emotional separation between you and another person) • Inability to say no • People-pleasing • Dependency on feedback from others • Paralysing fear of being rejected • Accepting mistreatment

The thing is, you are actually a complete badass, superstar, Wonder Woman. Somewhere inside of you KNOWS THIS IS TRUE, but you have not yet determined how to live in this space, to feel in this space, or to live FROM this space. Instead, you lay in bed at night replaying all the ways you or others failed you that day or worrying about what you did not check off your to-do list. The women I have worked with as a life and relationship coach over the past twenty-three years reached the point where they had had enough running around on this hamster wheel and felt ready to live a life they could adore. The women who call to work with me are ready to wake up every day completely rested and leaping out of bed with joy and inspiration. They are ready to live for love! They are ready to shed the perfectionistic habits, mindsets, and emotions that led them to overdo, over-try, over-extend, overwork, over-please, and be overly busy. That “lifestyle” has only served to the detriment of their bodies, minds, and spirits, and they are ready to claim joy and freedom without all the craziness, upset, and frustration!

Step #3. Identify where the negativity is coming from. Start by checking if it’s coming from you. If you’re tired, hungry, overextended, rushed, or in any way unhappy or uncomfortable, don’t be surprised if you’re the one who’s putting out bad vibes toward others (see Practice #2). Sometimes we’re our own worst enemy, and simple physical neglect is all it takes to feel that the world is against us. You may also be feeling negative vibes because you’re being overly critical of yourself. If so, ease up!

Baby, you have greatness written into every fiber of your being. You are walking in it, and I couldn’t be more proud of you. You don’t have to conquer the world baby. Do what you have to do to save our family. Shatter the Confederacy, and kick the Feds in their ass hard enough to get them to end their bullshit. But you don’t have to do more than that. The beauty of the Vanguard is that it’s an infrastructure for people to free themselves. What you started with the care packages, go farther.” I pulled my beard, thinking on her words. “So…hmm…you mean like…client kingdoms or satellite states?” “Exactly babe! You can offer whoever wants it a seat at the table can have one and if they need help we help them, but responsibly. Help them help themselves. You don’t have to conquer with the sword baby, you can break nations with your words alone. If you overextend yourself you can’t be who you were meant to be.

Well, folks, you can see that those superscrapers came through the storm just fine. It’s too bad they’re mostly empty right now. I mean they’re residential towers supposedly, but they were always too expensive for ordinary people to afford. They’re like big granaries for holding money, basically. You have to imagine them all stuffed to the top with dollar bills. The richest people from all over the world own the apartments in those towers. They’re an investment, or maybe a tax write-off. Diversify into real estate, as they say. While also having a place to visit whenever you happen to want to visit New York. A vacation place they might use for only a week or two every year. Depends what they like. They usually own about a dozen of these places around the world. Spread their holdings around. So really these towers are just assets. They’re money. They’re like big tall purple gold bars. They’re everything except housing.... Now, here below us is Central Park. It’s a refugee camp now, you can see that. It’s likely to be that for weeks and months to come. Maybe a year. People will be sleeping in the park. Lots of tents already, as you see.... So you know what? I’m sick of the rich. I just am. I’m sick of them running this whole planet for themselves. They’re wrecking it! So I think we should take it back, and take care of it. And take care of each other as part of that. No more table scraps. You know that Householders’ Union that I was telling you about? I think it’s time for everyone to join that union, and for that union to go on strike. An everybody strike. I think there should be an everybody strike. Now. Today.... What I mean by a householders’strike is you just stop paying your rents and mortgages ... maybe also your student loans and insurance payments. Any private debt you’ve taken on just to make you and your family safe. The daily necessities of existence. The union is declaring all those to be odious debts, like some kind of blackmail on us, and we’re demanding they be renegotiated ... So, we stop paying and call that the Jubilee? ... That’s an old name for this kind of thing. After we start this Jubilee, until there’s a restructuring that forgives a lot of our debt, we aren’t paying anything. You might think that not paying your mortgage would get you in trouble, and it’s true that if it was just you, that might happen. But when everyone does it, that makes it a strike. Civil disobedience. A revolution. So everyone needs to join in. Won’t be that hard. Just don’t pay your bills! ... What will happen then is that the absence of those payments of ours will cause the banks to crash fast. They take our payments and use them as collateral to borrow tons more, to fund their own gambling, and they are way, way, way overextended. Overleveraged.... At that point they will be asking the government to bail them out. That’s us. We’re the government. At least in theory, but yeah. We are. So we can decide what to do then. We will have to tell our government what to do at that point. If our government tries to back the banks instead of us, then we elect a different government. We pretend that democracy is real, and that will make it real. We elect a government of the people, by the people, and for the people. That was the whole idea in the first place. As they used to tell us in school. And it’s a good idea, if we could make it real. It might never have been real, up till now. But now’s the time. Now’s the time, people!

Well, folks, you can see that those superscrapers came through the storm just fine. It’s too bad they’re mostly empty right now. I mean they’re residential towers supposedly, but they were always too expensive for ordinary people to afford. They’re like big granaries for holding money, basically. You have to imagine them all stuffed to the top with dollar bills. The richest people from all over the world own the apartments in those towers. They’re an investment, or maybe a tax write-off. Diversify into real estate, as they say. While also having a place to visit whenever you happen to want to visit New York. A vacation place they might use for only a week or two every year. Depends what they like. They usually own about a dozen of these places around the world. Spread their holdings around. So really these towers are just assets. They’re money. They’re like big tall purple gold bars. They’re everything except housing.... Now, here below us is Central Park. It’s a refugee camp now, you can see that. It’s likely to be that for weeks and months to come. Maybe a year. People will be sleeping in the park. Lots of tents already, as you see.... So you know what? I’m sick of the rich. I just am. I’m sick of them running this whole planet for themselves. They’re wrecking it! So I think we should take it back, and take care of it. And take care of each other as part of that. No more table scraps. You know that Householders’ Union that I was telling you about? I think it’s time for everyone to join that union, and for that union to go on strike. An everybody strike. I think there should be an everybody strike. Now. Today.... What I mean by a householders’strike is you just stop paying your rents and mortgages ... maybe also your student loans and insurance payments. Any private debt you’ve taken on just to make you and your family safe. The daily necessities of existence. The union is declaring all those to be odious debts, like some kind of blackmail on us, and we’re demanding they be renegotiated ... So, we stop paying and call that the Jubilee? ... That’s an old name for this kind of thing. After we start this Jubilee, until there’s a restructuring that forgives a lot of our debt, we aren’t paying anything. You might think that not paying your mortgage would get you in trouble, and it’s true that if it was just you, that might happen. But when everyone does it, that makes it a strike. Civil disobedience. A revolution. So everyone needs to join in. Won’t be that hard. Just don’t pay your bills! ... What will happen then is that the absence of those payments of ours will cause the banks to crash fast. They take our payments and use them as collateral to borrow tons more, to fund their own gambling, and they are way, way, way overextended. Overleveraged.... At that point they will be asking the government to bail them out. That’s us. We’re the government. At least in theory, but yeah. We are. So we can decide what to do then. We will have to tell our government what to do at that point. If our government tries to back the banks instead of us, then we elect a different government. We pretend that democracy is real, and that will make it real. We elect a government of the people, by the people, and for the people. That was the whole idea in the first place. As they used to tell us in school. And it’s a good idea, if we could make it real. It might never have been real, up till now. But now’s the time. Now’s the time, people!

My point is, social media is a tool; use it to build what you want and take that from it. Try to surround yourself with kind, diverse perspectives. Listen and share openly. If you’re mired in anxiety, seek facts that bolster you, and if that fails, consider introspection. Ask yourself if your tension is as much over the state of politics as, say, having overextended yourself, or having made unfair comparisons.

If you constantly over think, over-analyze, over-compensate, over-act, overdo and overstate, you will have an over-flow of useless information that will cause you to overlook the simplicity of most situations. It’s time to overhaul your attitude. From now on over-rule the urge to overextend so you can effectively overcome your challenges and live your life less overwhelmed and more OVERJOYED!

This can result in us over-extending ourselves, as in offering inappropriate generosity or kindness in an attempt to “buy” the love from others. Sadly, this doesn’t work and often we feel resentful when we continuously give of ourselves and others still don’t meet our needs.

The advice I have always given to you is to be ambitious in your personal life. There are going to be plenty of people in your life who push you to work hours longer than the normal workday, expecting you to overextend yourself, and situations that pressure you to concentrate on your career. Some of that pressure may likely be self-imposed, as you focus on your pursuits and goals. But only you can prioritize your heart, and ensure that you work to nurture it. Your well-cared-for heart will be evident to all, opening you to those who will add promise and purpose to your life. The noblest ambition is to love someone.

Warm laundry, radio, waiting for the bus. I could get frustrated, overextended, overwhelmed, uncomfortable. Sometimes I ran late. But these banal inefficiencies—I thought they were luxuries, the mark of the unencumbered. Time to do nothing, to let my mind run anywhere, to be in the world. At the very least, they made me feel human. The fetishized life without friction: What was it like? An unending shuttle between meetings and bodily needs? A continuous, productive loop? Charts and data sets. it wasn't, to me, an aspiration. It was not a prize.

But because middle-class children today occupy privileged positions within the family, and because their parents have overextended themselves on their behalf, kids sense that they have the power to make their boredom their parents’ responsibility. Lareau noticed this immediately too. “Middle-class children,” she writes, “often feel entitled to adult attention and intervention in their play.

around, “some of the people went out to gather” anyway (Exod. 16:27). Why did they do this? More personally, why do we? We’re constantly gathering and producing and spending and eating and collecting and keeping and hoarding—beyond what we should, beyond what we need—instead of genuinely enjoying and appreciating what God has already done, instead of trusting that He is our ultimate provider and will sustain us when we honor His boundaries. Like ancient Israel, we tend to overextend, reaching

The all-pervading disease of the modern world is the total imbalance between city and countryside, an imbalance in terms of wealth, power, culture, attraction and hope. The former has become over-extended and the latter has atrophied. The city has become the universal magnet, while rural life has lost its savour. Yet it remains an unalterable truth that, just as a sound mind depends on a sound body, so the health of the cities depends on the health of the rural areas. The cities, with all their wealth, are merely secondary producers, while primary production, the precondition of all economic life, takes place in the countryside. The prevailing lack of balance, based on the age-old exploitation of countryman and raw material producer, today threatens all countries throughout the world, the rich even more than the poor. To restore a proper balance between city and rural life is perhaps the greatest task in front of modern man.

We are surrounded by a great cloud of people whose lives tell us what faith means. So let us run the race that is before us and never give up.” —Hebrews 12:1a NCV

(By the way, when Oprah Winfrey is suggesting you may have overextended yourself, you need to examine your fucking life.)