Nofx Quotes

I was experiencing every emotion, all at once, all the time, and it was, for the first time, completely undiluted. I was learning how to be human, and being human fucking sucks.

Iris wasn’t able to fight Raymond off. That’s just what she told Melvin. She

She showed me that dreams become reality only after you’ve put in the time and poured out the sweat. If

The first time I drank piss was on a fire escape overlooking downtown Los Angeles.

From 111 Mike " I never travel with drugs because I don't want to get caught at the airport, so if I ever have any coke or ecstasy left over after night of partying I tuck it in the pages of the Bible in my hotel room. I like to picture someone alone in the strange city, lost and looking for answers , opening the Bible and having my leftover drugs fall into his or her pal. I consider it missionary work." --- haha, never touch the hotel Bible, or, always check the Bible out?

I was pissed. Really pissed. It happens so often in your life: You tell people what they should do, over and over, and they don’t do it. And they pay the consequences. You can’t force someone to do something, no matter how much it would help them. It’s the most frustrating thing in the world. And you usually just have to sigh and let it go. But this was a tough one to shrug off.

We slept at the club, and the next morning around 10 a.m. Smelly discovered that they didn’t lock the bar. He grabbed a bottle of Jägermeister, said, “This is MY breakfast!” and downed half the fucking thing before we even loaded into the van. He went from lucid to plowed in about ten minutes. Three hours later, we pulled into Amsterdam and everyone got out of the van. Smelly sat down on the curb, then slowly lay down, and then passed out. He had laid his head in a pile of dog shit.

For all the lessons Raymond imparted to me, he never mentioned you’re not supposed to rip epic farts in a cell. Being the goof-off I am, I did just that and waited for everyone to laugh. But in jail farting isn’t funny, it’s disrespectful. Some older cholo guy got in my face and made it clear that I had fucked up. The mood in the room went from casual fun to seriously tense. Our respective racial groups took us to neutral corners, and I avoided getting murdered once again.