Mae West Quotes

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

There are no good girls gone wrong - just bad girls found out.

I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.

Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.

I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

When I'm good, I'm very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.

I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.

I'm single because I was born that way.

Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere.

I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.

Ladies who play with fire must remember that smoke gets in their eyes.

A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.

Marriage is a fine institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.

It's not the men in your life that matters, it's the life in your men.

Don't cry for a man who's left you--the next one may fall for your smile.

All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.

Sex is an emotion in motion.

I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.

Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.

Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.

Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.

It is better to be looked over than overlooked.

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.

Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.

Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else

JUDGE: Are you trying to show contempt for this court? MAE WEST: I was doin' my best to hide it.

You are never too old to become younger!

Love thy neighbor -- and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.

Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present.

He who hesitates is a damned fool.

Look your best - who said love is blind?

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.

A woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

To err is human - but it feels divine.

I have found men who didn't know how to kiss. I've always found time to teach them.

If a little is great, and a lot is better, then way too much is just about right!

Men are my hobby, if I ever got married I'd have to give it up.

Getting married is like trading in the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one.

When women go wrong, men go right after them.

The curve is more powerful than the sword.

Good women are no fun... The only good woman I can recall in history was Betsy Ross. And all she ever made was a flag.

I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do up the zipper on the back of your dress?

Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.

I never loved another person the way I loved myself.

The score never interested me, only the game.

Keep a diary and one day it'll keep you.

She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.

Women with pasts interest men because they hope history will repeat itself.

I've been things and seen places.

I only read biographies, metaphysics and psychology. I can dream up my own fiction.

I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.

Mae West, a famous vaudeville actress, once said, “A man’s kiss is his signature.” I grinned to myself. If that was true, then Ren’s signature was the John Hancock of kisses.

An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.

One more drink and I'll be under the host.

A man’s kiss is his signature.

Everyone has the right to run his own life- even if you're heading for a crash. What I'm against is blind flying.

Love isn't an emotion or an instinct - it's an art.

Love is like a booger, you pick and pick at it. Then when you get it you wonder how to get rid of it.

No one can have everything, so you have to try for what you want most.

I've been in more laps than a napkin.

I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.

An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away. ~Mae West

It's all right for a perfect stranger to kiss your hand as long as he's perfect.

Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for.

It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do it and say it.

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.

Woman: You certainly know the way to a man's heart. Mae West: Funny, too, 'cause I don't know how to cook.

A hard man is good to find.

Goodness, what beautiful diamonds!' 'Goodness had nothing to do with it'.

You may admire a girl's curves on the first introduction, but the second meeting shows up new angles.

I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.

Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I'm tired.

If I had known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself.

I saw what a mess a lot of people could make of their lives when they're smitten. Some of them go temporarily insane. They find a person who they think holds the key to their happiness-the only key to their happiness... My work has always been my greatest happiness

A man in the house is worth two on the street.

Men are all alike - except the one you've met who's different.

Brains are an asset, if you hide them.

Goodness had nothing to do with it.

I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported.

I've been rich and I've been poor, and rich is better.

You can do what you want, but saving love doesn't bring any interest.

It's about average for us. Behavior always draws more than survey. We're the sexy ones,' Nate said with a grin. Amy snorted. 'Oh, yeah, you guys are the Mae Wests of the nerd world.' We're action nerds,' Nate said. 'Adventure nerds. Nerds of romance.

When in doubt, take a bath...

Errar es humano, pero se siente divino.

Look at you, locked and loaded, like Mae West of the Motor City.

Sex with love is the greatest thing in life. But sex without love — that's not so bad either.

What's the good of resisting temptation? There'll always be more.

Man, you’re a regular Bonnie Parker.” “A dame that knows the ropes isn’t likely to get tied up.” Jesse found that hysterical. “Did Willie say that?” “Nope, Mae West. Now, how do I get on this thing in a skirt?

You only live once—but if you work it right, once is enough. —JOE E. LEWIS

Tu vivi solo una volta, ma se lo fai bene, una volta è abbastanza.

If I can't a man with a million dollars, I'll a million men with one dollar.

A me piacciono solo due tipi di uomini: gli stranieri e quelli del mio Paese.

So to hell with dignity. Dignity has got nothing on Rita Hayworth singing “Put the Blame on Mame” in Gilda, and absolutely nothing on Mae West in anything. It seems far more exciting to be a Siren beckoning with her song or Calypso captivating on her island than to be Penelope, the archetype of female fidelity, weaving and unweaving at her loom, sending her suitors away, waiting for the errant Odysseus to return, waiting while he luxuriates in lotusland, waiting while, as one correspondent to The New York Times Book Review put it, he “commits adultery with various gorgeous, high-class women,” waiting for her husband like Lucy waits for Desi at the end of the day, or Alice waits for Ralph at the end of the night. Bad girls don’t wait around—one doesn’t get to go everywhere by sitting by the phone.

Smiling victoriously, he crushed me against his chest and kissed me again. This time, the kiss was bolder and playful. I ran my hands from his powerful shoulders, up to his neck, and pressed him close to me. When he pulled away, his face brightened with an enthusiastic smile. He scooped me up and spun me around the room, laughing. When I was thoroughly dizzy, he sobered and touched his forehead to mine. Shyly, I reached out to touch his face, exploring the angles of his cheeks and lips with my fingertips. He leaned into my touch like the tiger did. I laughed softly and ran my hands up into his hair, brushing it away from his forehead, loving the silky feel of it. I felt overwhelmed. I didn’t expect a first kiss to be so…life altering. In a few brief moments, the rule book of my universe had been rewritten. Suddenly I was a brand new person. I was as fragile as a newborn, and I worried that the deeper I allowed the relationship to progress, the worse that the deeper I allowed the relationship to progress, the worse it would be if Ren left. What would become of us? There was no way to know, and I realized what a breakable and delicate thing a heart was. No wonder I’d kept mine locked away. He was oblivious to my negative thoughts, and I tried to push them into the back of my mind and enjoy the moment with him. Setting me down, he briefly kissed me again and pressed soft kisses along my hairline and neck. Then, he gathered me into a warm embrace and just held me close. Stroking my hair while caressing my neck, he whispered soft words in his native language. After several moments, he sighed, kissed my cheek, and nudged me toward the bed. “Get some sleep, Kelsey. We both need some.” After one last caress on my cheek with the back of his fingers, he changed into his tiger form and lay down on the mat beside my bed. I climbed into bed, settled under my quilt, and leaned over to stroke his head. Tucking my other arm under my cheek, I softly said, “Goodnight, Ren.” He rubbed his head against my hand, leaned into it, and purred quietly. Then he put his head on his paws and closed his eyes. Mae West, a famous vaudeville actress, once said, “A man’s kiss is his signature.” I grinned to myself. If that was true, then Ren’s signature was the John Hancock of kisses.

She's a bright girl. She learned in her thirteenth year that you can get old films of Mae West or Marlene Dietrich (who is a Vulcan; look at the eyebrows) after midnight on UHF if you know where to look, at fourteen that pot helps, at fifteen that reading's even better. She learned, wearing her rimless glasses, that the world is full of intelligent, attractive, talented women who manage to combine careers with their primary responsibilities as wives and mothers and whose husbands beat them. She's put a gold circle pin on her shirt as a concession to club day. She loves her father and once is enough. Everyone knows that much as women want to be scientists and engineers, they want foremost to be womanly companions to men (what?) and caretakers of childhood; everyone knows that a large part of a woman's identity inheres in the style of her attractiveness. Laur is daydreaming. She looks straight before her, blushes, smiles, and doesn't see a thing... Laur is daydreaming that she's Genghis Khan.

I wanted to be a sex goddess. And you can laugh all you want to. The joke is on me, whether you laugh or not. I wanted to be one -- one of them. They used to laugh at Marilyn when she said she didn't want to be a sex-goddess, she wanted to be a human being. And now they laugh at me when I say, "I don't want to be a human being; I want to be a sex-goddess." That shows you right there that something has changed, doesn't it? Rita, Ava, Lana, Marlene, Marilyn -- I wanted to be one of them. I remember the morning my friend came in and told us that Marilyn had died. And all the boys were stunned, rigid, literally, as they realized what had left us. I mean, if the world couldn't support Marilyn Monroe, then wasn't something desperately wrong? And we spent the rest of the goddamned sixties finding out what it was. We were all living together, me and these three gay boys that adopted me when I ran away, in this loft on East Fifth Street, before it became dropout heaven -- before anyone ever said "dropout" -- way back when "commune" was still a verb? We were all -- old-movie buffs, sex-mad -- you know, the early sixties. And then my friend, this sweet little queen, he came in and he passed out tranquilizers to everyone, and told us all to sit down, and we thought he was just going to tell us there was a Mae West double feature on somewhere -- and he said -- he said -- "Marilyn Monroe died last" -- and all the boys were stunned -- but I -- I felt something sudden and cold in my solar plexus, and I knew then what I wanted to do with my life. I wanted to be the next one. I wanted to be the next one to stand radiant and perfected before the race of man, to shed the luminosity of my beloved countenance over the struggles and aspirations of my pitiful subjects. I wanted to give meaning to my own time, to be the unattainable luring love that drives men on, the angle of light, the golden flower, the best of the universe made womankind, the living sacrifice, the end! Shit!