Lava Chicken Quotes

The man’s arm finally snapped at the elbow and the dagger dropped, and now Solomon Saunders held the dagger, and it was the worst way in the world to kill or be killed, and he felt his stomach erupting and scalding lava spilling over and eating up his insides as he raised his arm and hesitated, and the other soldier grabbed at him, and then Solly came down with a vengeance, and he felt the steel tear ruthlessly into human flesh like it was a chicken, and back and down, and he didn’t hate this man beneath him. “I don’t hate you, goddamn your hari-kari soul!” And down and back, down and back, and hot tears flooding Solly’s cheeks and nausea in his nasty throat and down and back, the man’s chest was a dark bloody geyser gushing blood, his pleading eyes his desperate eyes. “I don’t hate you, Tojo, damn you. I don’t hate you! I don’t even know you—damn you!” The boyish soldier gave up the ghost just as Solly’s steam gave out and he fell forward on top of this very very dead young stranger from the islands of Japan, and all was peace and all was quiet, and brotherhood and all that crap, even as the battle raged around the lucky living bastards who were dying on the strip for freedom.

Watch out!” Dave yelled. Spidroth and Jean-Cowphio turned their heads, looking up in horror as the jet of lava sped towards them… … but then something unexpected happened. One of Spidroth’s arms instantly transformed into a huge red shield, and the lava splattered harmlessly off of it. “Waa!” Spidroth yelled, looking at her gigantic shield arm. Wait, Dave realized. That’s not a shield… that’s a wing! Suddenly Spidroth’s body began twisting and contorting: red feathers the size of pigs bursting from her skin. “YAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGHHH!!!!” she screamed, as her eyes glowed and her body crackled with red electricity. “W-what’s happening to her?” Jean-Cowphio asked, dragging Vioroth’s unconscious body over towards Dave. “I… I think she’s monstermaxing,” said Dave. “Wait,” said Carl, as he and Chief Udder ran over to join them, “I thought she lost those monster-whatever powers?” “I guess not,” said Dave. “But this monstermax form looks different. It looks almost like…” “Oh, no way,” grinned Carl, looking up as Spidroth finished transforming. “I’m going to make fun of her so much if we all get out of this alive.” Spidroth had finished transforming, but this time she wasn’t a giant ball of spider legs and red eyes: She was a gigantic red chicken. “BWAAAAARRRKKKK!!!!!!!” The chicken roared, and then it charged towards the creeper queen. CHAPTER NINE Mega Chicken, I Choose You!